Fork in the road, each path leads to possibly more disappointment.

[JDStupi]

I just want to comment on a number of things, though I believe that what needs to be said has pretty much already been said.

First, it is evident that you have psychological problems and should seek help from a professional. You are unable to get over your past and seem to hold on to a lot of events. I'm not saying your unwarranted in doing so, simply that it is an unhealthy way of living and if you are that nervous by people knowing about your past there is something wrong. You should have the attitude of "F**k them, my life is for me and if they want to judge me, so be it". People are always going to judge you based off of some trivial or stupid criterion, it's what happens.

Second, I whole-heartedly endorse the military option. It is THE solution to all of your problems. Regarding your "What if I'm in the same boat x years from now" statement; yea, what if? "A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single footstep" what is the worst that can happen? Oh noooo you end up getting out of a miserable situation and getting into a different mindset for 4 years, what a horrible thing, sarcasm implied. You'll figure it out.

Third, "I am in good shape. I am not a couch potato, but yes I still do spend pretty much all of my free time hiding in the attic" doesn't make much sense to me.
To me it says "There is no point in me saying this but I am going to say it so that the forum people know that I'm 'doing good' and not out of shape" If you're spending all of your free time in an attic, that doesn't say much about you being in shape.

Instead of being a miserable helpless shell of a human, you should discover the power of the Will. Get out of your house, run a little bit. Walk in the woods by yourself. If possible go kayaking or canoeing or something . At least get out and do things . Get a book and go to the nearby park. There is nothing holding you in your attic except for yourself.

Oh and btw, have you ever read "Death of a Salesman"? I think you should

 

[SpringCreek]

One thing which I forgot to mention about the military is that you can definitely have a social life while enlisted, both on and off the base. I suggested the Air Force in part because the sexiest woman I've ever known was in the Air Force.

As for the Navy, I didn't think about a shore command, but after reading QuarkCharmer's posts I think the Navy would be an excellent choice.

 

[QuarkCharmer]

The navy let's you pick your job, and compete vs. your classmates for the pick of the best available orders. All written into the contract. That's not possible with the other branches. The AF might be nice too, but I know from experience that the Navy isn't half bad if you have a nice command (on dry land), and a job that does not put you in physical danger. Most of the AF people I know get sent to Qatar (which isn't bad really), along with no promise of your billet, and the Marines/Army, well, I'm not too fond of taking bullet fire myself. In terms of "get a free education and paid debts" I think the Navy is a way to go. I spent a lot of time researching my options before I picked a branch because I did not want to end up with a crap job in the middle of nowhere for low pay.

 

[dcm]

Not a veteran, but I doubt the Spanish certification would mean much to a recruiter. Theres no shortage of Hispanics in the Navy.

In the meantime while you make up your mind, use your car to take you places besides your job. Go away for the weekend now and then. Anywhere, doesn't have to be a touristy vacation spot. Someplace far away from where you live. Check into a motel and just walk the streets randomly. Spend the weekend trying to find a movie theater, catch a movie. Try to find the best place to eat in 'Anywheresville'. Stuff like that. It would be a lot more fun than sitting in the attic.

Thanks for the idea. When Spider-Man 2 came out, the plan was to go see it in theaters all over the state. The movie was very bad in my opinion, so I never did that. Maybe I will try that again for Transformers 3.

 

[dcm]

A few college credits can mean the difference between enlisting as an E-1/2/3. Typically you should be able to skip the first 2 ranks by completing some trivial program involving military history, that they provide for you to study. They CAN put you in as an E-3, it is their decision, and you should make sure they do that. The pay difference isn't significant, but you will be able to take the exam for E-4/5 sooner, and start getting BAH (Housing pay) which is essentially a free 1k a month. Not to mention, you have to listen to slightly fewer people.

If you have a problem listening to people who are probably dumber than you, and often are only looking out for their own interests, then it might now be for you. There are some really ignorant people in the Navy, I will be honest it's not the greatest thing in the world as far as intellectual fulfillment goes, but if you just do what you have to do, refrain from doing anything stupid (getting a DUI for instance), you will get a decent paying job for a few years with the ability to attend online courses free of charge, as well as a free ride through any University you choose when you are finished. (Don't ever use your GI bill while you are still enlisted!). If you are wondering what jobs require little work and don't suck in the Navy, here are some of the rates that have a high pay for minimum work ratio. They also don't require you spend any time on a boat, boats are for the birds.

AT - Works on radar, HF communication, repairing some instruments of aircraft.
AE - Inertial navigation, power generation/distrobution, general troubleshooting.
-both of these two provide some college credits in AC/DC theory, I was an AE myself and learned a great deal that directly applies to physics and engineering.

AME - They maintain things like ejection seats, work on crew comforts, air conditioning, troubleshooting electronics for bleed air turbines and such. Probably the easiest of all the technical jobs if you get the right command (read: not on a boat). Otherwise it's a crappy job. Note that AME is NOT an AM.

The only "more technical/relevant" job than those would be a Nuke Class position, but while it sounds ideal, and you essentially earn a free ride to 5 paygrades up as well as the college equal of an AS, you should know it REQUIRES 6+ years on your contract and they ALWAYS go on a submarine. The only place worse than going to a boat would be going on a submarine I would imagine. Skip the glamor, ignore all that honor stuff, don't volunteer for any sort of collateral duties (aircrew, seal, swc). The 1-2 hundred dollars extra a month isn't worth the 2x work required.

There are a bunch of clerical jobs and things that require no labor or learning for that matter. But under these jobs you will most likely be stuck on a boat. You DONT want to be on a boat. Your goal should be to kick all of your classmates butts during your A-school and earn the ability to pick your first command. You want to work at any shore command, or a sea-going command prefixed with VP-xxx. C130's and P3's never land on a boat.

There are 4 different "classes" of jobs. Airmen,Firemen,Seamen and something else I forget it's been so long. You DONT want to be anything that is not an Airman. The rest of them go straight to a boat, which you don't want to do. I spent a few weeks on a carrier once as a temporary assignment I volunteered for. I think if I had to be there any longer I would have jumped over the side lol.

Hope that helps, that's my "guide to not getting screwed in the armed forces from personal experience". If you have any more questions about it send me a pm.

Oh yeah: If you do decide to join, you have to declare yourself a resident of (some state). Regardless of where you are from or live in, you want to claim your resident state as one that does not have state taxes. Yes it's perfectly legal, as a member of the armed forces, you can be a resident wherever you want without actually living there.

Thanks for the very useful information. There is a cheaper community college nearby I can transfer into and finish in maybe 1.5 years. Would a two year degree in general education allow me to be around the smarter personnel? Also, I'm more into foreign languages than technical subjects. I will have to investigate further if the Navy will be a good fit due to this.

 

[dcm]

I just want to comment on a number of things, though I believe that what needs to be said has pretty much already been said.

First, it is evident that you have psychological problems and should seek help from a professional. You are unable to get over your past and seem to hold on to a lot of events. I'm not saying your unwarranted in doing so, simply that it is an unhealthy way of living and if you are that nervous by people knowing about your past there is something wrong. You should have the attitude of "F**k them, my life is for me and if they want to judge me, so be it". People are always going to judge you based off of some trivial or stupid criterion, it's what happens.

Second, I whole-heartedly endorse the military option. It is THE solution to all of your problems. Regarding your "What if I'm in the same boat x years from now" statement; yea, what if? "A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single footstep" what is the worst that can happen? Oh noooo you end up getting out of a miserable situation and getting into a different mindset for 4 years, what a horrible thing, sarcasm implied. You'll figure it out.

Third, "I am in good shape. I am not a couch potato, but yes I still do spend pretty much all of my free time hiding in the attic" doesn't make much sense to me.
To me it says "There is no point in me saying this but I am going to say it so that the forum people know that I'm 'doing good' and not out of shape" If you're spending all of your free time in an attic, that doesn't say much about you being in shape.

Instead of being a miserable helpless shell of a human, you should discover the power of the Will. Get out of your house, run a little bit. Walk in the woods by yourself. If possible go kayaking or canoeing or something . At least get out and do things . Get a book and go to the nearby park. There is nothing holding you in your attic except for yourself.

Oh and btw, have you ever read "Death of a Salesman"? I think you should

I do understand that I have a psychological problem, and my job offers offsite counseling for free if you have a disorder or abuse problem. I haven't really tried to seek the help because for some reason I believe that people, men or women, will view me as a man if I do not live with my parents. It sounds kinda silly, but that is what I think about when I see people. I wonder what they see when they see me, and I am reminded that I am a scared little boy in a mans body, living at home with mom and dad.
Although, there is a man living with his mother or grandmother two streets over. He has to be at least 38 years old, because he went to high school with my oldest sister.

About the military, yes I really have no real reason not to join up. I just somehow believe that if I keep scraping my dollars together to pay for community college and finish, maybe something will change.

The "I'm in good shape" thing, Nikitin mentioned sloth and I thought maybe he/she was trying to say I was fat slob that eats frozen pizza everyday. My current job and previous jobs have been manual labor type jobs and I eat healthy foods because I can't afford to waste money on the frozen prepared meals. I probably can't run a mile in 5 minutes, but after a hard days work my coworkers can't understand why I haven't dropped dead, considering the type of work that I do. I hope that maybe makes more sense.

About hiding in the attic, I stay there mainly because I'm trying to avoid my family. That is pretty much all there is to that. When I read books, I'm usually sitting in my car in the parking lot of a grocery store or my job. "Miserable helpless shell of a human" describes everyone in my immediate family. This is why I avoid them.

Thanks for the book recommendation. The campus library near my job has it checked in and I will go search for it this week.

 

[dcm]

One thing which I forgot to mention about the military is that you can definitely have a social life while enlisted, both on and off the base. I suggested the Air Force in part because the sexiest woman I've ever known was in the Air Force.

As for the Navy, I didn't think about a shore command, but after reading QuarkCharmer's posts I think the Navy would be an excellent choice.

Another good reason to join up. I wonder if it is possible to be friends with and/or date someone who is a higher rank than you. I imagine it would be a conflict of some sort if a Lieutenant was involved with a deckhand.

 

[QuarkCharmer]

Thanks for the very useful information. There is a cheaper community college nearby I can transfer into and finish in maybe 1.5 years. Would a two year degree in general education allow me to be around the smarter personnel? Also, I'm more into foreign languages than technical subjects. I will have to investigate further if the Navy will be a good fit due to this.

Well, in all honesty, the non-technical jobs will make you crazy with all the morons you will be forced to work around. Not only that, but they basically get shipped right to a boat. Then again, maybe that boat thing is something you might enjoy, I have known some people who like the idea of spending time at sea and visiting ports and such. I would work towards my AA/AS degree while IN the military, not before. That degree will get you nothing but an E3 paygrade which you can get yourself. I would think it would be better to spend your time in the military working on the degree so when you get out you can get right to business in your degree-field coursework.

Edit: As for the above comment, that is exactly what you don't want to do. Frat. like that, out of your paygrade so to speak is a no-no and while it sometimes goes un-policed, it can land you in jail believe it or not. You probably won't want to date any women in the military anyway to be honest. I just thought of it as a 9-5 job, and when work was over, I took off my navy-suit and made friends with the normal population.

 

[dcm]

The navy let's you pick your job, and compete vs. your classmates for the pick of the best available orders. All written into the contract. That's not possible with the other branches. The AF might be nice too, but I know from experience that the Navy isn't half bad if you have a nice command (on dry land), and a job that does not put you in physical danger. Most of the AF people I know get sent to Qatar (which isn't bad really), along with no promise of your billet, and the Marines/Army, well, I'm not too fond of taking bullet fire myself. In terms of "get a free education and paid debts" I think the Navy is a way to go. I spent a lot of time researching my options before I picked a branch because I did not want to end up with a crap job in the middle of nowhere for low pay.

I wouldn't mind staying on dry land, but those jobs you listed don't interest me that much. I guess I can do them anyway since it would mean I don't have to sit in the middle of an ocean for 6 months. Is the US Coast Guard similar to the Navy as far as having shore command jobs? I'll have to look them up, but I don't think they don't set sail as long as the Navy does.

 

[QuarkCharmer]

CG has limited jobs, mostly technical in nature, and you will spend a LOT more time at sea, just in shorter spurts. I also hear it's difficult to get in because they are relatively small. I don't know, that something worth looking into I suppose. Don't listen to recruiter talk though, speak to someone who is/has served active duty.

 

[dcm]

Well, in all honesty, the non-technical jobs will make you crazy with all the morons you will be forced to work around. Not only that, but they basically get shipped right to a boat. Then again, maybe that boat thing is something you might enjoy, I have known some people who like the idea of spending time at sea and visiting ports and such. I would work towards my AA/AS degree while IN the military, not before. That degree will get you nothing but an E3 paygrade which you can get yourself. I would think it would be better to spend your time in the military working on the degree so when you get out you can get right to business in your degree-field coursework.

Edit: As for the above comment, that is exactly what you don't want to do. Frat. like that, out of your paygrade so to speak is a no-no and while it sometimes goes un-policed, it can land you in jail believe it or not. You probably won't want to date any women in the military anyway to be honest. I just thought of it as a 9-5 job, and when work was over, I took off my navy-suit and made friends with the normal population.

Hmm, at my last job I only worked with ONE moron, and that was pushing me to my limit. I can't see myself being trapped on dry land or out to sea with SEVERAL. This may be a deal breaker, as I simply do not enjoy the technical subjects. Also, when we are talking morons, how big of a moron are we talking here? I was under the impression that the military had low tolerance for these dumbos and they would just lock them in the brig or force them to clean toilets or something.

 

[QuarkCharmer]

Morons are everywhere you go, you have to learn to deal with them eventually. I might be exaggerating a bit though. The Moron/Reasonable people ratio is about what you would find working at your average customer service job (I am referring to the customers). So it's probably a sample of the general population more or less. The only difference is, in the military you are usually not fired for poor-quality or lazy work, they just give you something crappier to do. And so, through a sort of military-osmosis, all of the Morons drip down the chain of command to the bad jobs.

 

[SpringCreek]

Another good reason to join up. I wonder if it is possible to be friends with and/or date someone who is a higher rank than you. I imagine it would be a conflict of some sort if a Lieutenant was involved with a deckhand.

As QuarkCharmer said, it's definitely a bad idea. The aforementioned 'sexiest woman' told me that a certain colonel wouldn't stop hitting on her. The end result was that he retired early, against his will.

On the other hand, she met her husband while they both were in the Air Force. I don't know what their ranks were, but neither of them were officers.

Anyway, I was just saying that you can have a pretty normal life in the military, a social life being just one aspect of that.

And yeah, unfortunately, morons in the workplace are unavoidable no matter where you work. I currently work with several morons, each of whom has a PhD. I used to work with attorneys and there were idiots among them too. It's just a fact of life. Not such a big deal really.