I am an Engineering student but it has always been my dream to become a Physicist. So, I decided to continue on with my degree and extend my studies to Physics (I still have two years left in Engineering). However, in class, I wouldn't be whom you would be calling as "smart". My whole life, I did the least effort to "just pass", thus, my grades are not sterling. This semester, I realized that if I wanted to become a Physicist, I have to study hard. And study I did. Except I barely raised my test scores from when I barely studied. (10-20 point difference) In class, I do get the concept. Concept comes easily to me. I could explain to you how it works, but when applying it on a problem, I barely could. Also, I've seen people (mostly girls) who I assume are very hard workers but just can't be at the "top". There's this one guy, who does not do any written papers AT ALL but manage to ace all the subjects and went on the compete nationals. He is interested in Physics as well and I sometimes think he's like Paul Dirac. Though not as quiet. Anyway, I am fascinated with him and I wonder if I could ever reach his level. Anyway, Why am I not getting sterling marks now? Is it because I barely knew how to study before thus, I couldn't possibly change my habits in just one semester? Or is it because I really don't stand a chance when I put up work? Breaking my notion that if I just studied, I would've been at the top? College has taught me lot of great things particularly of the fact that I am not as bright as I would like to think. This breaks my heart actually. Also, I think that my years spent on slacking in school has put me at a disadvantage because my foundation is not as strong as some of my colleagues. Maybe it is because of this? Do I have to relearn everything?