Checklist Accomplished: Launching My Daughter Into the World

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The discussion revolves around the emotional journey of a parent as their child transitions to college, highlighting the various responsibilities and joys of parenting. Key points include the satisfaction of completing a checklist of parenting tasks, from nurturing and educating to supporting their child's independence. There is a bittersweet acknowledgment of the challenges faced when leaving a child at college, with reflections on how many peers of the child are not pursuing higher education due to missed applications rather than financial issues. The conversation also touches on the evolving nature of parenting, including the complexities of discipline and the importance of allowing children to make their own mistakes. Participants share personal anecdotes, emphasizing the mixed feelings of pride and sadness as children grow up and leave home. The thread concludes with a sense of community support and shared experiences among parents navigating similar life stages.
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  • #33
Go Molly Go Go Go! :biggrin:


Now mom's checklist wasn't that bad, was it?... *Waiting for Molly's checklist* :-p
 
  • #34
Danger said:
I just found that I'm not 22. I do believe that, but don't like it.

I have pretty much stopped believing that I age. :-p
 
  • #35
rootX said:
I have pretty much stopped believing that I age. :-p
You stop aging the year that you first have to start calculating your age.

"How old am I? Uh, let's see. Born in '64... this is '10, so..."

Happened to me at about 44.
 
  • #36
Congrats lisab- that must feel awesome and a little heartbreaking! I still remember leaving for college and having my parents drop me off. It was simultaneously liberating and scary. I remember looking forward to talking to my parents on the phone and hearing their voices- it was comforting.

Just remember if you send her some food, send a lot. The kids in our dorm that shared their parents home cooking were always well liked! :biggrin:


rootX said:
Danger said:
I just found that I'm not 22. I do believe that, but don't like it.
I have pretty much stopped believing that I age. :-p
I had the same revelation as danger in June when I tore my Achilles. Turns out believing something is quite different from it being true! :-p

DaveC426913 said:
You stop aging the year that you first have to start calculating your age.

"How old am I? Uh, let's see. Born in '64... this is '10, so..."

Happened to me at about 44.
That made me chuckle out loud!
 
  • #37
Congratulations lisab, and Molly too!111
 
  • #38
lisab said:
Feed her - check.
Keep her clean - check.
Read to her - check.
Play with her - check.
Teach her how to swim, ride a bike, do a summersault - check.
Explain the wonders of the world - check.
Treat boo-boos with band-aids and kisses - check.
Be very silly with her - check.
Help with homework - check.
Ground her when she's bad - check.
Serve as taxi when needed - check.
Cover the refrigerator with her art and awards - check.
Comfort her when her heart breaks - check.
Encourage her to trust her judgement - check.
Teach her to drive - check.
Marvel at her independence - check.
Indulge her by buying books she wants - check.
Share her joy at getting accepted to her #1 choice college - check.
Take her to her college and leave her there - check.

Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?

Look out world, she's been launched!

Congratulations, lisab! You sound like an exceptional parent, and I've no doubt that your daughter is well prepared to start this next phase of her life. :smile:
 
  • #39
That list is not enough for me. Don't get me wrong, I love that list, except . . . well, never mind. And I admire parents taking time to learn how to raise healthy children. We know what some of the consequences for not doing that are. Me, I'd just ask her, "girl, you ready to start the next phase of your life?" At that age, I'm pretty sure my daughter would have said, "what phase?" but maybe she's not the average.

But how do you make sure that's she's ready? For me, that list is not enough. That's what I mean.
 
  • #40
jackmell said:
That list is not enough for me. Don't get me wrong, I love that list, except . . . well, never mind. And I admire parents taking time to learn how to raise healthy children. We know what some of the consequences for not doing that are. Me, I'd just ask her, "girl, you ready to start the next phase of your life?" At that age, I'm pretty sure my daughter would have said, "what phase?" but maybe she's not the average.

But how do you make sure that's she's ready? For me, that list is not enough. That's what I mean.

I don't think lisab's post is intended to be a comprehensive parenting checklist, jackmell. :wink:
 
  • #41
jackmell said:
But how do you make sure that's she's ready? For me, that list is not enough. That's what I mean.
You don't.

The last item on the list really should be:

...and then let them go out and make their own mistakes. You will not always be there as a crutch to "make sure" they're ready.
 
  • #42
Dembadon said:
I don't think lisab's post is intended to be a comprehensive parenting checklist, jackmell. :wink:

Hi. I'm sorry I didn't quote you above with that comment I made. You said:

Congratulations, lisab! You sound like an exceptional parent, and I've no doubt that your daughter is well prepared to start this next phase of her life.

Ok, that's what's not enough for me. Not her checklist. That is, her check list is not enough for me to decide that she is an exceptional parent and that her child is well-prepared for the next phase in life. I'm not saying she and her are not, I'm just saying that I need more information about her family to say things are good. And she doesn't care what I think, right, but I'm just implying I guess that it takes a whole bunch more to be a good parent and a whole bunch more to raise a child well that's all.
 
  • #43
Wait, I thought your daughter's school was only a 1 hour drive? Going to my office is a one hour drive. :-p

Evo Child moved an hour away for school and was back 5 days a week. She was in my place at least 2-3 times a week.

Does your daughter have a car?
 
  • #44
jackmell said:
...
Dembadon said:
Congratulations, lisab! You sound like an exceptional parent, and I've no doubt that your daughter is well prepared to start this next phase of her life.
Ok, that's what's not enough for me. Not her checklist. That is, her check list is not enough for me to decide that she is an exceptional parent and that her child is well-prepared for the next phase in life. I'm not saying she and her are not, I'm just saying that I need more information about her family to say things are good. And she doesn't care what I think, right, but I'm just implying I guess that it takes a whole bunch more to be a good parent and a whole bunch more to raise a child well that's all.

I'm sure we all could come up with thousands of things to put on a list, but I don't think one needs to do that in order to claim that lisab sounds like an exceptional parent. In addition, "The list" isn't the only thing I considered. She's made countless posts, especially in the Academic Guidance and Relationship sections, that confirm my feelings. However unsubstantiated my claim may be, I feel comfortable it would hold up to scrutiny.
 
  • #45
My mom tells me that the best way to determine if you're a good parent is to observe how your children parent their own children.

Soooo...I hopefully have many years before I experience that!
 
  • #46
Evo said:
Wait, I thought your daughter's school was only a 1 hour drive? Going to my office is a one hour drive. :-p

Evo Child moved an hour away for school and was back 5 days a week. She was in my place at least 2-3 times a week.

Does your daughter have a car?

Yes, it's only an hour (maybe 1.5 hours) and yes, she has a car. But for the last year she's been like a racehorse waiting to run. I'd be surprised if she comes back even once a week, but I wouldn't mind that at all :biggrin:.
 
  • #47
lisab said:
Yes, it's only an hour (maybe 1.5 hours) and yes, she has a car. But for the last year she's been like a racehorse waiting to run. I'd be surprised if she comes back even once a week, but I wouldn't mind that at all :biggrin:.
Evo Child had so much freedom growing up that she loved coming home once she started college, it kept her connected with the familiar.

We raised our girls very differently, but they both grew up great, and that's all that matters.
 
  • #48
When I moved out, I never came back.

Well, I did drive by the house once. Turned out that right after I moved out, my parents moved and didn't leave a forwarding address. Worse yet, they sold anything I left behind at a garage sale right before they moved.
 
  • #49
BobG said:
When I moved out, I never came back.

Well, I did drive by the house once. Turned out that right after I moved out, my parents moved and didn't leave a forwarding address. Worse yet, they sold anything I left behind at a garage sale right before they moved.

Wow, are you one of my brothers?!?

My parents did the same. Well they did leave a forwarding address, but they moved into a one-bedroom apartment.

But the garage sale...they sold the chest of drawers I used through high school, and the bottom drawer was full of my diaries :cry:! Why didn't they check the dang drawers? Who sells a chest of drawers without checking what's in it?!?
 
  • #50
lisab said:
Wow, are you one of my brothers?!?

My parents did the same. Well they did leave a forwarding address, but they moved into a one-bedroom apartment.

But the garage sale...they sold the chest of drawers I used through high school, and the bottom drawer was full of my diaries :cry:! Why didn't they check the dang drawers? Who sells a chest of drawers without checking what's in it?!?
I was lucky, my dad died young and my mother didn't move because of bad health.

On the other hand, all of my old writings and drawings disappeared when my older daughter found them and thought that they were so cool that she took them to friend's homes to show them off and lost them all.
 
  • #51
Evo said:
I was lucky, my dad died young and my mother didn't move because of bad health.

On the other hand, all of my old writings and drawings disappeared when my older daughter found them and thought that they were so cool that she took them to friend's homes to show them off and lost them all.

Dang! I hope there wasn't anything too personal in them.
 
  • #52
lisab said:
Dang! I hope there wasn't anything too personal in them.
Nah, just all of my writings and art since I was 14 to age 28, nothing important. :cry:


<hyperventilates>

I keep telling myself...pretend your house was burned down and you lost everything, happens all of the time.
 
  • #53
Evo said:
On the other hand, all of my old writings and drawings disappeared when my older daughter found them and thought that they were so cool that she took them to friend's homes to show them off and lost them all.

How do you just lose a pile of writings and drawings?
 
  • #54
DaveC426913 said:
How do you just lose a pile of writings and drawings?
I stupidly had collected everything together into a large cedar chest for preservation.

My daughter - "ooh look at all of this great stuff my mother's done!". I will take this and show it to friends so that they know how cool she is! :cry:
 
  • #55
Evo said:
I stupidly had collected everything together into a large cedar chest for preservation.

How did she get the large cedar chest over to the friend's place? And then how do you lose an entire cedar chest?

Not that it's any of my business and all.
 
  • #56
Evo said:
I stupidly had collected everything together into a large cedar chest for preservation.

That's why I put everything in an online blog and try to have a copy of them on my local computer.

What kind of writings those were?
 
  • #57
GeorginaS said:
How did she get the large cedar chest over to the friend's place? And then how do you lose an entire cedar chest?
She didn't move the chest, she removed the contents.

Oh well, I'm hoping to get back into art and starting again.
 
  • #58
Evo said:
She didn't move the chest, she removed the contents.

Oh well, I'm hoping to get back into art and starting again.

Nice! What medium?
 
  • #59
DaveC426913 said:
How do you just lose a pile of writings and drawings?

They obviously ran out of toilet paper at her friend's house and didn't have the heart to tell Evo the true story.
 
  • #60
BobG said:
They obviously ran out of toilet paper at her friend's house and didn't have the heart to tell Evo the true story.
<gaaaasp>

---------------------------------------------------------------flatline
 

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