The old wrod for "action" means the same as the current word for "impulse." Impulse is defined as the change in momentum. So if two objects collide (call them object A and object B) and they bounce off each other, then the change in momentum of object A will be equal in magnitude to the change in momentum of object B, though opposite in direction. THis is essentially the law of conservation of momentum.
Since impulse is equal to the change in momentum, and impulse can be calculated as the applied force multiplied by the time through which the force is applied (impulse = Ft), you can see that since A cannot touch B for a different amount of time than B touches A, the forces on each otehr also must be the same.
So the modern statement of Newton's 3rd Law is sometimes stated as "If one object exerts a force on a second object, then the second object exerts a force equal in magnitude but opposite in direction on the first object."
THis is the customary "high school" definition; the better definition incorporates the conservation of momentum. Either way the use of the word "action" is arcane and inappropriate.