Is Coasting Through Life Sustainable for a Young Adult?

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A 24-year-old woman is currently living rent-free with a friend while struggling to find stable employment. After quitting a full-time job she had for a couple of months, she has been job-hunting for over a month without success. Despite having previously supported herself as a cashier, she now expresses dissatisfaction with minimum wage jobs, showing a sense of entitlement. She aspires to be an artist but spends limited time on her artwork, relying on past insurance money for expenses. Concerns are raised about her lack of motivation and the fragility of her current living situation, as well as the potential consequences of her aimlessness. Discussions highlight generational differences in work ethic and the impact of enabling environments on personal responsibility. The conversation also touches on the importance of having goals and the challenges of balancing creative pursuits with financial stability. Overall, there is a sense of frustration regarding her choices and the perception that she may be avoiding necessary responsibilities.
  • #31
Just don't enable her, but let her do her thing.

The thing about being a loser is you get sick of it eventually. I have so many things I want to do with my life that just sitting around doing nothing would drive me insane.

Don't lend/give money, but she's an adult and full capable of making her own decisions.
 
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  • #32
There's a saying that to become an expert (or at least competent) in the arts that it requires 10,000 hours of solid practice.

I'm sure most people here agree that even something not considered "artistic" (like physics, engineering, and so on, even though I consider these equally artistic) that it has taken people probably a similar amount of time to become very good in their chosen field.

I agree with the above poster(s) that have said to just let things be. You usually have to hit rock bottom in a lot of circumstances before you recover. Reality, especially harsh, is probably the biggest motivator. When people don't face reality (like for example getting free rent, food from someone else), then of course they don't have much to worry about because they haven't faced the necessary hardship to change.

It's unfortunate that it usually takes rock-bottom to wake people up, but in my experience (personal), it took just that.

To the OP, it seems like you have a good heart, but don't get emotionally swallowed by this friend of yours. I don't know you, her, or anything about your relationship with her, but I have been with similar people in the past and they can really drain you if you are not careful.
 
  • #33
blade123 said:
I have so many things I want to do with my life that just sitting around doing nothing would drive me insane.
but for some people its more like
A.A. Milne said:
There was once an old sailor my grandfather knew
Who had so many things which he wanted to do
That, whenever he thought it was time to begin,
He couldn't because of the state he was in.
 

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