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Rate The Humour.... Worth a Read??

Poll closed Dec 7, 2007.
  1. NO! Absolutely Pathetic Waste of my Time

    7 vote(s)
  2. OK! Worth one Visit... Just a Glance

    4 vote(s)
  3. BRIL! I'll PASS it ON to ALL My Colleagues!

    0 vote(s)
  4. WOW! I Wanna POST it on the ENTIRE Internet!

    1 vote(s)
  1. Jul 10, 2007 #1
    Lab Lovers - ACRONYMS ALERT ALL!! (NYM)

    10th July 2007

    RE: Rehearse Those Acronyms...

    Dear All,

    Known affectionately as NIM... Here is a Bit of "FUN" attached

    Fondest Regards to ALL True Physicists...

    Yours affectionately

    Tim (NYM) Newey


    Attached Files:

  2. jcsd
  3. Jul 10, 2007 #2


    User Avatar

    Staff: Mentor

    The attachment is copyrighted, but it appears to be copyrighted by you, so I'll approve it.
  4. Jul 10, 2007 #3
    For anyone that does not want to download the .doc.

    Acronym Dictionary
    Parton Distribution Function Sets
    CTEQ - either "The Coordinated Theoretical-Experimental Project on QCD" or "The Project on Collaborative Theoretical and Experimental Studies of QCD" or The Coordinated Theoretical/Experimental Project on Quantitative QCD Phenomenology and Tests of the Standard Model (or make up your own) or Curious Techniques to Evacuate Queers
    DFLM - Diemoz-Ferroni-Longo-Martinelli or Definitely Found Lost Minds
    DO - Duke-Owens or Door Opens
    EHLQ - Eichten-Hinchliffe-Lane-Quigg or Energy Heist Language Quiz
    GRV - Glück-Reya-Vogt or Get Real Voltage
    HMRS - Harriman-Martin-Roberts-Stirling or Has Mensa Run Short?
    MRRS - Martin-Roberts-Ryskin-Stirling or Mike Ran Round Security....
    MRS - Martin-Roberts-Stirling or Mike Ran Security
    MRST - Martin-Roberts-Stirling-Thorne or Mike Rang Security Telephone
    MT - Morfín-Tung or “MIKE! TELEPHONE!!”
    High-Energy Particle Physics Acronyms
    1PI - One Particle Irreducible or 1 Physics Irretrievable
    ACOT - Aivazis-Collins-Olness-Tung or All Calm On Telephone
    sACOT - simplified Aivazis-Collins-Olness-Tung or Seriously All Calm On Telephone!
    BFKL - Balitskii-Fadin-Kuraev-Lipatov or Bloody Fire Kept Leaking!
    CCFM - Ciafaloni-Catani-Fiorani-Marchesini or Change Canister For Mike
    DGLAP - Dok****zer-Gribov-Lipatov-Altarelli-Parisi or Dog Garn Laser After Prep’s!
    BPHZ - Bogoliubov-Parasuik-Hepp-Zimmerman or Bloody People Have to Zone!
    BRST - Becchi-Rouet-Stora-Tyutin or Big Rush on Security Telephone
    CKM - Cabibo-Kobayashi-Maskawa or Check Kelvin Magnet
    CP - Charge conjugation-Parity or Check “Particle”
    CPT - Charge conjugation-Parity-Time reversal or Check “Particle” Telephone
    DLA - Double Logarithm Approximation or Door Left Ajar
    DY - Drell-Yan or Definitely Yellow
    DIS - Deeply Inelastic Scattering or Door Instructions Standard
    MS - Minimal Subtraction or Made of Steel
    MS-bar - Modified Minimal Subtraction or Made of Steel bar
    GLS - Gross-Llewellyn-Smith or Gave Lucy Sample
    GeV - Giga-electron-Volt (109 eV) or Generous Voltage
    TeV - Tera-electron-Volt (1012 eV) or Testing Voltage
    IR - Infrared or Ian’s Rubbish
    KLN - Kino****a-Lee-Nauenberg or Keep Level Nebulas
    LLA - Leading Logarithm Approximation or Low-lying Action
    LSZ - Lehmann-Symanzik-Zimmerman or Luscious Safety Zone
    LO - Leading Order or Leave Out
    NLO - Next to Leading Order or Normally Left Out
    NNLO - Next to Next to Leading Order or Not Normally Left Out
    PDF - Parton Distribution Function, Portable Document Format, or Physics Dead Fools
    pQCD - perturbative QCD or partly Quantum Compact Disc
    QCD - Quantum Chromodynamics or Quantum Compact Disc
    QED - Quantum Electrodynamics or Quantum “Extra” Disc
    SU(n) - Special Unitary group of n x n matrices or Seemed Unusual
    SM - Standard Model or Safely Measured
    SUSY - Supersymmetry or Seen/UnSeen - Yes!
    MSSM - Minimally Supersymmetric Standard Model or Massive Store / Store Massive
    UV - Ultraviolet or Usually Vanishes
    YM - Yang-Mills or Young Minds
    Collaborations, Laboratories, and Machines
    BNL - Brookhaven National Laboratory or Brought Neon Lights
    AGS - Alternating Gradient Synchrotron or Also Going Somewhere
    RHIC - Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider or Rather Heavy Isolation Catch
    CERN - Conseil Europeen pour la Recherche Nucleaire (European Organization for Nuclear Research) or Campaign for Emergency Ratified Nuisance
    ATLAS - A Toroidal LHC ApparatuS or “At The Law-Abiding Social”
    BCDMS - Bologna-CERN-Dubna-Munich-Saclay or “BUY CONDOMS!!”
    CDHS - CERN-Dormund-Heidelberg-Saclay or Compact Disc Has Suffered
    CDHSW - CERN-Dormund-Heidelberg-Saclay-Warsaw or Compact Disc Has Suffered Worse!
    CHARM - CERN-Hamburg-Amsterdam-Rome-Moscow or CERN Has Alternate Resource Management!
    EMC - European Muon Collaboration or Electro-Magnetic Crisis
    ISR - Intersecting Storage Ring or Immediate Sense of Relief
    LEP - Large Electron Positron or Lying Evidence is Positive
    LHC - Large Hadron Collider or Left Her Cold!
    NMC - New Muon Collaboration or Nearly Mentioned Cause
    PS - Proton Synchrotron or Pissed Specimen
    SPS - Super Proton Synchrotron or Seriously Pissed Specimen
    SMC - Spin Muon Collaboration or Should Mention Collaboration
    NA# - Experiment at CERN or Not All Music
    UA# - Experiment at CERN or Usually All Music
    WA# - Experiment at CERN or WAS All Music
    DESY - Deutsches Elektronen-SYnchrotron or Did Eventually Sign, Yellow
    HERA - Hadron Elektron Ring Anlage or Has Extreme Risk Attached
    FNAL - Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory or Find Nearby Assisting Lab.
    CCFR - Chicago-Columbia-Fermilab-Rochester or Could Catch Fever-Risk
    CCFRR - Chicago-Columbia-Fermilab-Rochester-Rockefeller or Could Catch Fever-Risk Restored
    CDF - Collider Detector at Fermilab or Compact Disk Found!
    KTEV - Kaons at the Tevatron or Kill-Terminal Eventual Value
    NuTeV - Neutrinos at the Tevatron or New Terminal Value
    BEBC - Big European Bubble Chamber or Buy Expensive Bubble Catcher
    CMOR - or See Less
    E# - Experiment at Fermilab, BNL, or other laboratory or Eventual Music
    LSND - Liquid Scintillator Neutrino Detector (Los Alamos) or License Should Not Deviate!
    NLC - Next Linear Collider or New Line of Checking
    SLAC - Stanford Linear Accelerator Center or Silence Leaves As Chaos!
    SSC - Superconducting Supercollider or Send Someone Clever!
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2007
  5. Jul 10, 2007 #4
    Based on the fact that I worked at APL ,group RSI, subset of RTDC, and then in group GED, of global precision engagement
    (NSTD), I voted "OK! Worth one Visit... Just a Glance"
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