Dismiss Notice
Join Physics Forums Today!
The friendliest, high quality science and math community on the planet! Everyone who loves science is here!

Physicist, mathematician and engineer jokes.

  1. Nov 7, 2009 #1
  2. jcsd
  3. Nov 7, 2009 #2

    Moonbear

    User Avatar
    Staff Emeritus
    Science Advisor
    Gold Member

    :rofl: I like the Hunting and Red Rubber Ball ones the best.
     
  4. Nov 8, 2009 #3
    Hey I resent that red rubber ball joke. Now where is my ANSI book on offenses so I can figure out how much I resent it, or maybe it is in one of my ASTM books.
     
  5. Nov 10, 2009 #4

    tiny-tim

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    Dirac on a train

    I think the "sheep" joke gets it wrong …
    i] surely the physicist would know all about how to make observations, while the mathematician may not even be aware that there are two-sided sheep?

    ii] and anyway, it was a physicist, Dirac, who made the observation that this joke is based on …

    From http://books.google.com/books?id=Gf...#v=onepage&q=Dirac train sheep shorn&f=false" of "Quips, quotes, and quanta: an anecdotal history of physics" By Anton Z. Capri …
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 24, 2017
  6. Nov 10, 2009 #5
    No, the mathematician lights the papers in the trashcan on fire reducing it to the previous case.
     
  7. Nov 17, 2009 #6
    Whats a mathematician doing outside your home???
    Well, (s)hes waiting for you to pay her/him for the pizza :frown:

    Whats the most common question a mathematician will ask?
    "Wooouuuldddchaaa like fries with your order sIIIIr/maaaaAAAm???
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2009
  8. Nov 17, 2009 #7
    What's the difference between a mathematician and a pizza?

    The pizza can feed a family.
     
  9. Nov 17, 2009 #8
    Would you add apples and oranges ?
     
  10. Nov 18, 2009 #9

    tiny-tim

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    To a pizza? :confused:

    Or to a π? :biggrin:
     
  11. Nov 18, 2009 #10
    lllllloooooooooooooooooollll :rofl: haha so sillyyy
     
  12. Nov 18, 2009 #11

    Redbelly98

    User Avatar
    Staff Emeritus
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    :rofl:
     
  13. Nov 18, 2009 #12

    mgb_phys

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    Prime numbers;
    Computer scientist; 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime,

    Sheep in Scotland:
    Astronomer: after seeing one sheep, - see all sheep in Scotland are black
    Computer scientist; Ohh look baa-baas
     
  14. Nov 19, 2009 #13
    Physicist: How does the universe work?
    Engineer: How does an aircraft work?
    Mathematician: Do you want fries with that?

    These are generic and anything can be substituted for mathematician, we used to use: "Arts Major"
     
  15. Nov 19, 2009 #14

    BobG

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    Close.

    A physicist curls the fingers of his right hand with his thumb sticking straight out, then rotates is hand around and looks at it from different angles and thinks, "I'm actually getting paid to do this."

    An engineer aligns the thumb, index, and middle finger of his right hand so they're all perpendicular to each other, rotates his hand around and looks at it from several different angle while thinking, "I'm actually getting paid to do this."

    A mathematician carefully curls the fingers of right hand, and carefully stretches his thumb out along the spatula as the grease from each burger he flips leaves tiny little circular burn marks all along his forearm, he attempts to wipe the sweat from his brow with his left hand, but only smears hot grease across his forehead, and all the while he's wondering if there's some way he can hide in graduate school forever.
     
  16. Nov 19, 2009 #15

    turbo

    User Avatar
    Gold Member

    My musician friends and I used to use "drummer".

    Ex: How many female vocalists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. She holds the bulb in the socket and the world revolves around her.
     
  17. Nov 19, 2009 #16

    mgb_phys

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    What did the drummer get on his theoretical physics exam ?

    drool...
     
  18. Nov 19, 2009 #17

    turbo

    User Avatar
    Gold Member

    How do you know when the roadies have gotten the riser level? Drool comes out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.
     
  19. Nov 19, 2009 #18
    here, we use that joke for argentinans!!!

    as well as "dad, when i grow upsh i wanná be just like yoú! so that i can háve a son like mé!!!"
     
  20. Nov 20, 2009 #19
    Why is 6 afraid of 7 ?


    Because 7 8 9.
     
Know someone interested in this topic? Share this thread via Reddit, Google+, Twitter, or Facebook




Similar Discussions: Physicist, mathematician and engineer jokes.
  1. Engineer jokes (Replies: 11)

Loading...