Hey, I am going to major in engineering physics come fall and purchased Spivaks' "Calculus" after seeing it recommended a lot (here amongst other places). I expected it to be hard but it's excruciatingly so. I have done some HS calculus before but that was more memorizing how to solve a particular type of problem and then doing it over and over. Never done any proofs based maths before (closest to a proof I have come is some trig equalities) so the style of this book is obviously quite new to me. I'm actually enjoying my time with the book, only on chapter two and I can spend hours on a single exercise. I find myself getting help from solutions or the back of the book for more questions than I manage on my own while some I have a lot of trouble getting even with the solutions/I understand what is done but it's a 100% "Not a chance I'd come up with that". Feels like such a victory when I do get something right though. If I had all the time in the world and nothing else going on I'd stick with it, but as the pace I'm getting through it at is so slow I doubt I'll have gotten much actual calculus done come fall. I'm essentially just wondering if I would be much better off using some less rigorous book that's easier to work through and isn't as proof based (I'm spending plenty of time just learning how proofs work here). I have my dads old Robert Adam's "Calculus: A Complete Course 3rd ed." (later edition is used in my uni as a supplement to their own material) and I've considered purchasing Stewart's "Calculus": Hell I could spend some time getting familiar with linear algebra, looking at the theory it seems to start off simple enough. Any input would be appreciated, really quite at a loss here. Sorry if it's in the wrong board, not quite sure where this would go.