Anyone else feel/have felt dumb? ^^

[maka89]

Hey.

I am dealing with a weird problem now a days…

When I was younger I was really into solving problems, math, computers etc. and felt really smart. It became a big part of my identity.

Now a days I have problem concentrating and keeping up with the work at uni and I get mediocre results. I guess that started some time in high school.

I tend to get really obsessive about my work and what's weird is that if I work with something that I don't feel is important myself(For instance if it is something you don't have to understand, but rather have to read/memorize which I figure I can do myself at a later time if I am going to work with it) my mind starts wandering towards other topics such as really theoretical stuff or unsolved problems in physics etc.

It is really hard to stop thinking about those topics(even though I'm not at a high enough level to understand the problems properly yet) and I feel a bit like I'm going crazy thinking about them. However if i start trying to learn more about them I soon lose my patience and never get far. I guess I just want to feel smart again…

I think it started because at some point in my life I didn't feel like being smart anymore because I had social problems and didn't feel like i fit in. I attributed my problems to being smart I guess, which I in retrospect see was a mistake(Even though there's a cliche about smart people struggling socially and there might be a correlation, I am sure now that it is not being smart that leads to the social problems).

I guess the main problem now is I don't know what to do when I start obsess about heavy topics that are outside the curriculum. It takes a lot of energy and I know that if I try to not think about it the obsession(like all obsessions) will only get worse. But if I sit down trying to do something that is pretty draining too and I feel pretty crazy.

Anyone else had/have similar problems?

 

[lisab]

Actually, I have had a similar problem, years ago. I went to talk to a professional counselor about it because I knew losing control of my thinking was no small issue. Especially since mental illness runs in my family.

Turns out, the stress I was under at the time was disrupting my sleep. I was severely sleep deprived! Such a simple thing! But I couldn't see it, because...well because when you're sleep deprived and you can't think straight. I needed a professional to help me see the real issue.

You should go talk to a professional about this. They know their stuff!