Is it okay to cheat on a spouse that has Alzheimer's?

  • Thread starter Thread starter BobG
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Discussion Overview

The discussion revolves around the ethical implications of infidelity in the context of a spouse suffering from Alzheimer's disease. Participants explore the obligations one might have to a partner who is mentally incapacitated, the emotional toll on caregivers, and the complexities surrounding marriage vows in such circumstances.

Discussion Character

  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification
  • Exploratory

Main Points Raised

  • Some participants question the moral obligation to remain faithful to a spouse who no longer recognizes them due to Alzheimer's, suggesting that the spouse's lack of memory complicates traditional views on fidelity.
  • Others argue that the decision to cheat or remain faithful should be guided by personal integrity and the values upheld at the time of marriage, regardless of the spouse's condition.
  • A participant references Pat Robertson's views, noting that while he opposes adultery, he acknowledges the challenges faced by caregivers of spouses who are mentally gone but physically alive.
  • Concerns are raised about the financial implications of divorce, particularly regarding the care and support of an incapacitated spouse, and whether divorce would negatively impact their standard of living.
  • One participant draws a parallel between the treatment of a spouse with Alzheimer's and the treatment of a severely disabled child, arguing that ethical considerations should focus on the integrity of the caregiver rather than the condition of the incapacitated individual.
  • Another participant reflects on personal experiences with caregiving and the emotional burden it entails, expressing uncertainty about how they would handle a similar situation with their own family.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Participants express a range of views on the topic, with no clear consensus reached. Some advocate for fidelity based on personal values, while others see the complexities of the situation as justifying infidelity. The discussion remains unresolved with multiple competing perspectives.

Contextual Notes

Participants highlight various assumptions, such as the emotional and financial implications of divorce, the nature of marriage vows, and the ethical considerations surrounding caregiving. These factors contribute to the complexity of the discussion without providing definitive resolutions.

  • #31
BobG said:
It's not like they'd remember it even if you got caught.

Or, more seriously, what sort of obligation do you have to a spouse that's so far gone they don't even remember who you are anymore? In other words, was it evil of Michael Schiavo to be living with his girlfriend for years while his wife, Terri Schiavo, was brain-dead, but physically alive, in the hospital?

Do they not recollect the wedding vows each made to the other?

“…to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, from this day forward until death do us part?”

Within that sacred promise is found the steadfast answer to your question.
 

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