Part of the starting of my sci-fi stories

[alteredmind]

So tell me what you think folks, is any of this jargon good or does it suck?

I claim that it is all original and from me, I did not borrow form anyone. if someone wishes to use my ideas from these stories then do not forget to credit me. all this material is typed from what has remained in a old cardboard or paper folder I have. I had worked on these plots or whatever is the correct term for them, brainstorming and timelines on and off for several years or more. The old floppy disk I have has the rest of the contents of my work stored in it but my pc floppy drive seems to not allow me to look at the word documents so I can look at the stuff. what is inside the floppy is more stuff related to my work and has a starting or beginning of a movie plot as well a movie prolog without the time travel element and altered somewhat. I had worked on these things while going threw a fase before I became a atheist and a little while afterwords so it may seem a little spiritual,religious or even funny.

-Ideas for movie, brain storm-

-takes place thousands of years into the future
-nations are obsolete and humans dominated the Earth as one major entity(not new world order dictatorship or all seeing triangle one eye conspiracy)
-civil war on the planet is a thing of the past and remains a part of history
-poverty is also obsolete on the planet and no longer exists
-everybody is rich, nobody is poor or homeless but not everybody is at the same level of wealthiness(not like communism)
-energy resources are unknown in movie(new energy resources are powerful and renewable)
-people live longer and are more youthful and are smarter and healthier
-all of Earth's known history and human history is well organized and stored in large and almost endless amounts of high tech super powered information archive data blocks of the future
-universal donor- 0 blood type-can give blood to anyone, biotechnology AB- can receive blood from anyone
-not allowed to travel into the future, only the past and you can only travel in the past to observe

RELIC OF THE SACRED

(prologue)
Thousands of years into the future, humans traveled to the stars and beyond, they have

discovered many alien races and various star systems with life on it.New energy resources exist

that are cleaner, more powerful and renewable. Nations are obsolete and humans dominate the

earth as one major entity. Civil war on the planet is a thing of the past and remains a part of

history. Disease and poverty are obsolete on the planet and no longer exist. people do not age

and have eternal youth. They live wealthy on theplanet in mobile cities that expand for 100s of

miles long with soaring sky scrapers high into there atmospheres. Humans evolve using nano

machines witch they also use to clean planet environments. They have droid colonies that they

monitor to find life and explore the universe. War on the planet is only a shadow of the past but

has continued in a galaxy and beyond between aliens from different worlds who fight amongst

themselves and have fought against humans. Some fight for domination or power, some for greed,

others for vengeance. In the past, some have fought foe the cause of universal prosperity like

humans and some have never gone to war or no longer choose to go to war. for over a millennia

humans and neighboring alien races have lived in piece, at these times of piece they have they

have sworn allegiance to each other and have kept the other races outside of the galactic alliance

regions from invading. The alliance wants universal prosperity for all races in the galaxy and

beyond but there efforts for negotiations with outsiders have failed and ever since then the

alliance and outsiders remain separated from each other and haven't had contact with each other

for centuries. During those times, the alliance had worked together to build the ultimate project

that would give them the ability to travel through time and they succeeded. Organizations of the

time scientists within the alliance had formed what is known as the time federation. In the

federation time travelers into the past to gain knowledge and history of how there worlds and the

universe began All of Earth's discovered history is stored in large and almost endless amounts of

high tech super powered archive data blocks. an exotic alien race known as the emengeians

outside the alliance located in galaxy Andromeda follow a prophesy from there ancestors that tells

of a highly advanced superior intelligent extinct alien race that the emengians call the "elakishem"

the ancient prophesy tells that the 'elakishem" created them and brought the emengians to there

home world plent "Oron" to protect and guard a ancient relic called the Meta Stone made by the

Elakishem from evil. the prophesy tells that the universe will end will end and the meta stone is

the only thing that will save the universe. The 3 shards of the meta stone is needed to operate it

but have been taken out, one belonging to the Emengians safely hidden on one of the moons of

Telinos and the rest separated throughout the universe. The prophesy tells that one of the shards

is located on Earth but was but was programmed by the Elakishem to self destruct at some point

in the past to prevent it ffrom falling into the wrong hands in the future witch the Elakishem

foresaw using the power of one of the shards. They foresaw that man would one day travel into

the past and could take the shard into there own hands to one day save the universe. The

prophesy states that the 3rd shard can only be accessed when the other two shards are

together witch will open a gate way to the third shard(4th shard?!?)

It has been one hundred years since the time travel was possible and the human division od the

time federation called the baylon ministry has been called upon by leader Zoman of Earth to apoint

a time traveler to journey back though time in order to retrieve a piece of an ancient artifact

known as the meta (something) key. His mission is to find the last 2 shards of the meta stone and

return it to the emengians to use it one day to save the universe. The galactic spy known as

Kalcott Almana has stolen a ancient artifact known as as the black sun jewel from the emengians

that is said from there ancestors to have been made bye the elakishem. An enscribed picture and

writing on the black son jewel is said to be the answer of where the Earth shard lies. the krelian

race who are part of the alliance have secretly made a deal with the alien race outside the

alliance to destroy the alliance and take control of the galaxy using the Meta stone for power if

they succeed in finding all the shards first.

more to come

 

[vemvare]

You bothered writing all this but didn't bother to check your text over to maintain tempus or do a spell-check? It is really, really difficult to read.

 

[alteredmind]

-TIME BUSTERS STORY 2- first story is missing

(preview of war)As Hemrot travels to a time farther back then genesis, he is murdered by an evil

time buster called Browa. The baylon ministry hears about it and then contacts the leaders Asla

who tells Harrot of his fathers death. Harrot travels back in time to avenge his fathers death. The

first year he travels back to is the year 5900bc where he first sees his fathers murder place. He

first encounters the murderer Etock, he fights him but then he escapes. before etock escapes

herot puts a time tracker on him so that etock can be tracked down threw time. The next year he

travels to is the year 32D.C(during christ) :( in Jerusalem. He records what what talks to jesus are

there and then. jeus tells him "if you wish to seek the one called Etock, thus you will only find him

in the year 1200AD in the japan dynasty". So Harlot travels to 1200AD in old Tokyo Japan. he

records what he can but finds no trace of etock. He ask a smaurai soldiers if he has seen any

strange looking characters in the city, he responds with a no and some bad guys from the future

end up killing the smaurai but harlot kills them off. So next Harlot travels to the time 1942AD. He is

in Germany during world war 2. He finds etocks small spaceship, he looks there but there is

nothing inside. he spots Etock down. Harrot sees etock and etock makes a run for it in his

spaceship HARROTS zonga, he chases down etock. Harot see etock and etock makes a run for it

to his spaceship. Withc herots zonga he chases down etock and shoots him down at the france

beach of Burgandy. HARROT GETS OUT of his zonga and chases etock across the beach

batlefields. Etock escapes once again while Harrrot is left in the battle fields with soldgers,. harrot

stops time and rewinds it back before any solgers got killed by him. Before time is set back to it's

orginal place herrot jumps back to his auto piloted zonga and travels to the year 2148A.D There is

a dispute between America and Iraq where an American spy is caught stealing future oil from iraq.

Harrot travels to the city baghdad and later records a battle that the that americans fought

against the other nations. The last year he travels to be to be the year 3840A.E HARROT FINALLY

TRACKS DOWN ETOCK in a nanoofactory. Etock sets up a time dimension vortex that harrot almost

gets suck into. He finally fights etock in the final battle by using up all his weapons and then

fights with his saber sword. With all of etocks power he knocks herrots saber out of his hand while

it breaks in mid air. Etock then fights him against saber sword against man without sword. Etock

ends up giving harrot a powerful air back kick and harlot falls to the surface. Etock jumps towards

herrot but while he is in the sor harrot uses a hand laser cord stretcher to catch browas sword in

mid air while Harrot catches it and browa falls on to his own sword. Harlot then travels back to

his own time to be with his wife and celebrates new years even though there's a war going

on.(credits roll)

 

[alteredmind]

time busters story 3

(allamers dream) allamer is a only a young amengardian child atthe age of 80 who lives with his

family ina colony on one of the moons of planet Arion. The colony on the planet is attacked by

Jackons. The jackons destroy half of the planets Amengardans people, city and other things. They

also destroy a quarter of there moon colony. Jackon warriors destroy his home and slaughter his

perents and sister. He is spared and is out on a slave ship to a slave colony. He some how sneaks

onto a ship and escapes to planet Earth into the lower depths of malanen city. He wakes up and

has flash backs of his past life growing up in the ghetto. He is at his new house in the high parts

of malanen city. He goes down to where his foster home is to visit his friends at a bar and his dad

at his house. He is called apon bye the head of baylon minsitry priest scientist to tell him that

emperor Ashla has called for him. She speaks with him and orders him to travel through time to

complete the research. He agrees and goes on his first mission in time, he first travels to the time

2550A.D with the elon civilization at there main capital ice city Emron. He collects as much data

as he can and then leaves to the year 1742 A.D He is an american colony and helps a black slave

escape to freedom. He then collects his data and next travels to the year 600A.D with the aztec

indians. They notice his appearance becuase he forgot to put stealth mode on and they fight him

becuase he is in there territory he explores the aztec temples and records what he can. He then

travels to the year 2100BC. He is in ancient greece and he studies there civilization. He spots out

2 mec bike speeders and a black zonga flying up above. He chases the black zonga threw a time

portal while the mec bike speeders and a black zonga threw a time portal while the mec speeders

try and shoot him. He slows down real fast so that the bike speeders end up in front of him and he

shoots them down with his gun blasters. They arive at Earth when Earth is very young, There is

only Earth ground, water puddles, plants, thunder and ligtining. He encounters the time brothers,

He fights both of them at the same time. He kills one by doing a back thrust with his saber sword

and back kicks one away. He fights the other one and ends up killing him by giving him a strong

deadly thrust blow. He ends up walking in the sun set from a far distance towards his zonga. (the

credits role)

 

[alteredmind]

time busters story 4

Herrots sun Harlot is 6 years old and is slashed in the cheek by a demon while he is playing outside

of his home. That slash becomes a scar for life on his body. After leader Ozla is through with

playing popular future sport called ectorime. He calls upon harlot to travel through time to keep

evil hakoon from destroying Earth for good. Harlot is nw 22 years old anda young inexperienced

time traveler. The first year he travels to is 1326A.D in Spain. When he arrives there he records as

much information a she possibly can and then leaves becuase his real mission is is to track down

hackoon. The next year he travels to is the year 400 A.D at a location where there is German

barbaric group and a lost almost exitnct barbarian group called Jardian Hord. Harlot records what's

there and then travels to the year 2500 bc with the Egyptians. he visits the people and then

hears a voice call him. He goes in a Egyptian pyramid temple and sees the demon that he saw

when he was a little boy. He fights the demon and puts it away for good. He then travels to the

year 3000 BC. in a old mountain on Earth somewhere he goes deep into the cave and finds a four

dimension vortex. He assumes that it is hakoon that it is hackoon that sets up the dimensions and

it was a trap. harlot uses a heat sensor and finds somebodies foot prints that followed to one of

the dimention holes and he went in it. It took a Jurassic time period in Earth's history. Harlot is

suddenly attacked by a t-rex, he kills it and ends up eating some of it as dinner. He sets up a

small encampment in the wilderness and sleeps for a day. the next day he awakes, he encounters

a small car speeder with blaster with blaster turrets. It tries to run him over and shoot him down.

He jumps over it and when he is in the air he pulls out a plasma gun and shoots down the speeder.

Hakoon pops out of the door and tried to shoot harlot. Harlot doges the laser and bounces the

lazer beam to hackoon with his saber sword. Hackoon also doges it and then takes out his two

twin saber swords and fights harlot. Harlot ends up getting one of the swords out of hackoons

hold and fights hackoon while hackoon only has one saber left. Harlot goes for his legs but

hackoon back flips and when he lands harlot runs towards him, Slices his arm with the sword in it,

gives him a side slash to the stomach then diagonal slash and then a thrust to his stomach killing

him for good. The movie ends with harlot riding away in his zonga and the credits role.

 

[alteredmind]

time busters Harlots Mission (year4202)

Ever since Earth has been at piece and has kept a piece treaty with most aliens in the middle rim of the galaxy and the galaxy andromeda. Herrot grew old and had a son named harlot with his middle name hemrot Junior after his dead grandfather. Harlot became a time traveler in his later years. As a boy it is said that harlots cheek was scared bye a demon when he was a little boy. Harlot is 22 and is called apon by emperor ozla who is half human and half nano and is the sun of Oshla. He orders harlot to travel back in time and complete his mission through time for the human race. He encounters some new villains and new evil time traveler called hackoon. He is out to destroy the humans past as though it nevr happened. Harlot must stop him before it is to late.

 

[alteredmind]

timelines

time busters complete timeline time span of midevil period. newest events to oldest events.

4150-war with jackons
3800AE-age of nanohumans
3500-Zenith formed Earth's nations togeather and became one nation of Earth
3000-reformation of new nations
2500-apocalypse
2100- world war 3

time busters story 1

(4125AE) time in witch story begins
3500AE-city Zenith
3000A.D
2500A.D
2100A.D-apocalypse
1984A.D- New york city
1438A.D-Germany
100A.D-Rome
1400B.C-Islam
3300B.C-Cyrillics
genessis

time busters story 2
(4150AE) time in witch story begins
3840AE-almost gets trapped in dimensional vortex in nanofactory
2148A.D-in Iraq
1942AD-in Germany world war 2
1200A.D in japan dynasty
32D.C jeruselem
5900BC-homo sapiens or earlier humans

story 3
(4160AE)time in witch story begins
2550A.d-Ice city emron
1742A.d american colonie helping black slave
1598A.D in russia battle with france
600A.D with aztec indians
2100A.D early greeks
Earth's beginnings-final battle with time brothers

story 4
(4202AE)time story begins
1326a.d spain
400A.D with german barbaric groups and another
2500BC- first demon, egyptions
3,800bc
jerassic time period with dinosaurs- fights Hackoon

 

[alteredmind]

You bothered writing all this but didn't bother to check your text over to maintain tempus or do a spell-check? It is really, really difficult to read.

don't sound religious please, I fixed errors, take another look.

 

[dkotschessaa]

Ok, couldn't read the whole thing. It reads more like a summary of a story than an actual story, or like a history. You've also written it in present tense, which can work as a literary device sometimes, but is not usually the way stories are written. The style is very amateurish and you have a lot of standard sci-fi stuff in there, but also no lack of imagination.

Please don't stop writing. But please do work on your writing - grammar, style, flow, etc. You need to read a lot. Read in the genre you are interested in but also read classic literature and anything you can get your hands on. But don't lose that imagination and sense of wonder.

-Dave K

 

[alteredmind]

copy/pasted and altered from another thread.

Do you think the time travel/science/techinical stuff should or could be based on hard core real scientific theories, the old scientific theories and the new theories? I suppose I could try to make it as realistic as I can while keeping the story lively and based on real true logic, you might want confused mathew from youtube to review my story before showing it to the public. I suppose I should try to not borrow any elements from other sci-fi stories. I think people would rather think this stuff I have now is bad or a joke, I don't know. I've showed a work associate at one of my old jobs years ago and in this thread of course.

do you think all this meantioned in this post would be good ingredients for a story or a sci-fi movie?

 

[dkotschessaa]

copy/pasted and altered from another thread.

Do you think the time travel/science/techinical stuff should or could be based on hard core real scientific theories, the old scientific theories and the new theories? I suppose I could try to make it as realistic as I can while keeping the story lively and based on real true logic, you might want confused mathew from youtube to review my story before showing it to the public. I suppose I should try to not borrow any elements from other sci-fi stories. I think people would rather think this stuff I have now is bad or a joke, I don't know. I've showed a work associate at one of my old jobs years ago and in this thread of course.

Do you mind if I inquire about your science background and such? It might help me answer your questions.

People have varying degrees of tolerance for how "hard" their sci-fi is. The "hardest" sci-fi is written by people with fairly impressive science backgrounds. You can have softer sci-fi, and at the "bottom" level of realism is fantasy, which is very difficult to do well, and the market is flooded with bad fantasy.

What books and sci-fi have you read?

You should subscribe or otherwise start reading Analog (http://www.analogsf.com/) Some of the writers are on Google+ and have writing workshops there. It's classified "hard" sci-fi, and there are science fact articles (that discuss the possible implications of science on fiction) as well as stories about writing in general.

do you think all this meantioned in this post would be good ingredients for a story or a sci-fi movie?

You've got the raw ingredients. I don't think you have a coherent story yet. Keep writing and developing it, even if you never do anything with it than keep it for yourself, or to give yourself ideas. If you are really into writing you should have a word quota (say 1000 or 2000 words a day). I know a guy that does something like 20,000 words a day (that's full time). Most of it doesn't get published of course.

Here's some neat links I got from stumbleupon.com's writing category:
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-ultimate-guide-to-writing-better-than-you-normally-do
www.novelr.com/2007/11/15/kurt-vonneguts-8-rules-for-writing-fiction
www2.hn.psu.edu/faculty/jmanis/assign/e50xs1.htm
io9.com/366707/8-unstoppable-rules-for-writing-killer-short-stories?tag=writing-advice


Really to write sci fi you need to:
Learn a lot of science
read and write a lot of fiction

 

[GTOM]

The beginning reminded me a bit to Heavy Metal FAKK 2000. (That is no accusation of course, i also have a list of inspirators, and i don't think it is a bad thing to learn from others.)

 

[alteredmind]

Do you mind if I inquire about your science background and such? It might help me answer your questions.

People have varying degrees of tolerance for how "hard" their sci-fi is. The "hardest" sci-fi is written by people with fairly impressive science backgrounds. You can have softer sci-fi, and at the "bottom" level of realism is fantasy, which is very difficult to do well, and the market is flooded with bad fantasy.

What books and sci-fi have you read?

You should subscribe or otherwise start reading Analog (http://www.analogsf.com/) Some of the writers are on Google+ and have writing workshops there. It's classified "hard" sci-fi, and there are science fact articles (that discuss the possible implications of science on fiction) as well as stories about writing in general.




You've got the raw ingredients. I don't think you have a coherent story yet. Keep writing and developing it, even if you never do anything with it than keep it for yourself, or to give yourself ideas. If you are really into writing you should have a word quota (say 1000 or 2000 words a day). I know a guy that does something like 20,000 words a day (that's full time). Most of it doesn't get published of course.

Here's some neat links I got from stumbleupon.com's writing category:
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-ultimate-guide-to-writing-better-than-you-normally-do
www.novelr.com/2007/11/15/kurt-vonneguts-8-rules-for-writing-fiction
www2.hn.psu.edu/faculty/jmanis/assign/e50xs1.htm
io9.com/366707/8-unstoppable-rules-for-writing-killer-short-stories?tag=writing-advice


Really to write sci fi you need to:
Learn a lot of science
read and write a lot of fiction

I have no science backround whatsoever but I know a bit of high school science level stuff and have read stuff on the internet about it and learned from that. I am just a common man but I did attend college but didn't study or learn from college any science. I ihave read I robot bye Issac asimov, robot dreams and one 2 of the Issac assimov's foundation series, a book on the history of the samurai's,introduction to plato, aristotle complete works jonathan barnes(part of the politics) niccomacean ethics(joe sachs) haven't finnished reading the whole thing, bokken(dave lowrey) art of the japanese sword,the unknown nostradomus by peter lemesurier, ultimate manga lessons 1 drawing made easy.