Scientific Comebacks: Get a Clever Response from a Physicist

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The discussion revolves around sharing humorous scientific "yo mama" comebacks, emphasizing cleverness and wit. Participants contribute various comebacks that blend humor with scientific concepts, such as physics and mathematics. Examples include jokes about density, gravity, and scientific theories, showcasing a playful take on intelligence and body size. The thread encourages creativity, with users responding to each other's jokes and building on the humor. There is a mix of light-hearted banter and more complex scientific references, reflecting a community engaged in both comedy and intellectual discourse. The tone remains jovial, with users appreciating the cleverness of the comebacks while also playfully critiquing each other's contributions.
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Tired of not being able to come up with a good comeback? Look no further than this post (once we have a good number of comebacks) . Below, please post a good scientific comeback.

For example, I'll post mine:

Yo mama is so dumb, she believes in the luminous aether.
 
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MadScientist 1000 said:
Tired of not being able to come up with a good comeback? Look no further than this post (once we have a good number of comebacks) . Below, please post a good scientific comeback.

For example, I'll post mine:

Yo mama is so dumb, she believes in the luminous aether.

That's luminiferous. I.e. "carrying light" (Latin fero: I carry) not "being lit up".
 
Yo mamma so dumb, she looked into the laser beam with her remaining eye.
 
Yo mamma so dumb, she mistook a lead radiation-shielding brick for her tinfoil hat and died.
 
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Yo momma so dumb, she's John Marburger.
 
Yo mamma so dense, she works at a nuclear research laboratory. As shielding.
 
Yo mamma so dense, everywere she goes the bystanders learn about general relativity.
 
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Yo mamma so dumb, GWB personally appointed her as director of NASA climate research.
 
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Yo momma so dumb, she drove 130 miles to attend a protest against a nuclear plant and it's shameless polluting of the environment.
 
  • #10
Yo mamma so dumb, she thought "cosmic microwave background radiation" meant her kitchen appliance was malfunctioning.
 
  • #11
Yo momma so dumb, she works for NSA cryptography. As a random-number generator.
 
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  • #12
Yo momma so dumb, she invented a new tinfoil-hat replacement. It's actually a hair gel, not a foil. And it's made of mercury.
 
  • #13
Yo mamma so dumb, she even wears tinfoil sunglasses.
 
  • #14
Yo momma so dumb, she not only believes in hidden-variables quantum mechanics, she converses with them!
 
  • #15
And this is why physicists get a bad rep!
 
  • #16
Yo momma so dumb, she drove her contour integral into a pole; she escaped with only minor injuries.
 
  • #17
Hurkyl said:
And this is why physicists get a bad rep!

What is? ...[/color]
 
  • #18
Rach3 said:
Yo momma so dumb, she drove her contour integral into a pole; she escaped with only minor injuries.
Well, if she drove around the pole, she'd have to come back to pick up the residue.
 
  • #19
Gokul43201 said:
Well, if she drove around the pole, she'd have to come back to pick up the residue.

There would be no residue if she didn't come back...
 
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  • #20
Yo momma so fat, she rolls along the road as a perfect frictionless sphere, without slipping.
 
  • #21
Yo mamma so dumb, she looked into a curved mirror and fell over.
 
  • #22
Oh my god Rach, these are really funny.
 
  • #23
lol Rach3:smile:
 
  • #24
Rach3 said:
Yo momma so dumb, she drove her contour integral into a pole; she escaped with only minor injuries.

lolz :smile:
 
  • #25
What... now this is a Rach fan club thread? :biggrin:
Rach, your momma is so dense she absorbs neutrinos.

To the OP... keep in mind that the only time you can have a snappy come-back is if you have a rubber on too tight. (Hence the term 'anti-climax'.)
 
  • #26
Yo momma so stupid she tried to minimize a 12 variable function to a minimal sum of products expression using a karnaugh map instead of the Quine-McCluskey Algorithm
 
  • #27
Your mom is so dumb, she is still trying to divide by zero.
 
  • #28
Yo momma so fat, her integral is fat plus a constant, where the constant is equal to more fat.

(not mine)
 
  • #29
Your mom is so fat, she is dense in \mathbb{R}^3
 
  • #30
Yo mama is so dumb, she believes \pi is a rational number equal to three.

Yo mama is so dumb, she drank a bottle that clearly said Sulfuric Acid and belched out loud.

Yo mama is so fat, she got hired as a pusher plate for the new Orion spacecraft .
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Orion_(nuclear_propulsion)

Yo mama is so fat, she recently got hired to take the place of a graphite rod at a nuclear power plant.

Yo mama is so fat, when she jumped and landed on Earth, she caused the extinction of the dinosaurs.
 
  • #31
Yo momma is so fat scientists used her weight as an approximation for \infty, and found it was too high.
 
  • #32
Yo momma so dim we might as well ditch "dark matter" and substitute "yo momma".

PS, forgive me if this is lame.. lol
 
  • #33
SticksandStones said:
Yo momma is so fat scientists used her weight as an approximation for \infty, and found it was too high.

:smile: :smile: :smile: Good one.
 
  • #34
Leopold Infeld said:
Yo momma so dim we might as well ditch "dark matter" and substitute "yo momma".

PS, forgive me if this is lame.. lol

ROFLMAO...

Nice one
 
  • #35
Yo momma is so wasted that she has trouble pronouncing "transmission electron microscope pamphlet".

Yo momma is so fat and slow that she gets to the buffet table by literally taking every possible path to it.

Yo momma is so fat and that her de Broglie wavelength is so very short.

Yo momma is so fat that Chandrasekhar reached his limit very fast.

Yo momma is so fat that even John Forbes Nash couldn't play a n-person zero sum game with her.

Yo momma is so fat that she goes beyond quarterly structure.

Yo momma is so fat and stupid that her motto in life is "I'm fat, therefore I am (fat)".

Yo momma is so stupid that she though that the plum-pudding model was a diet.
 
  • #36
EmilK said:
Yo momma is so fat and slow that she gets to the buffet table by literally taking every possible path to it.
Ahahaha

Yo momma is so fat that a Bose-Einstein condensate is left on her seat...made of fermions.
 
  • #37
yomamma said:
Yo momma so stupid she tried to minimize a 12 variable function to a minimal sum of products expression using a karnaugh map instead of the Quine-McCluskey Algorithm

Hahaha! :smile:
 
  • #38
Yo momma's so dumb the inside of her skull is the only known perfect vacuum.
 
  • #39
Just put all your comebacks into one reply man. its annoying reading through all those replies every 2 minutes.
 
  • #40
ranger said:
Just put all your comebacks into one reply man. its annoying reading through all those replies every 2 minutes.

But it takes so long to come up with them! :frown:

edit: all right, I'm working on it...
 
  • #41
Rach3's vaguely physics-related insults

Praise the muses!

In chronological order:

Yo mamma so dumb, she looked into the laser beam with her remaining eye.

Yo mamma so dumb, she mistook a lead radiation-shielding brick for her tinfoil hat and died.

Yo momma so dumb, she's John Marburger.

Yo mamma so dense, she works at a nuclear research laboratory. As shielding.

Yo mamma so dense, everywere she goes the bystanders learn about general relativity.

Yo mamma so dumb, GWB personally appointed her as director of NASA climate research.

Yo momma so dumb, she drove 130 miles to attend a protest against a nuclear plant and it's shameless polluting of the environment.

Yo mamma so dumb, she thought "cosmic microwave background radiation" meant her kitchen appliance was malfunctioning.

Yo momma so dumb, she works for NSA cryptography. As a random-number generator.

Yo momma so dumb, she invented a new tinfoil-hat replacement. It's actually a hair gel, not a foil. And it's made of mercury.

Yo mamma so dumb, she even wears tinfoil sunglasses.

Yo momma so dumb, she not only believes in hidden-variables quantum mechanics, she converses with them!

Yo momma so dumb, she drove her contour integral into a pole, escaping with minor injuries.

Yo momma so fat, she rolls along the road as a perfect frictionless sphere, without slipping.

Yo mamma so dumb, she looked into a curved mirror and fell over.

New ones (27/12) start here:[/color]

Yo mamma's so fat, she's not allowed to visit LIGO or anywhere in a 10-mile radius.

Yo mamma so fat, whenever she falls down the Comprehensive Nuclear Test Ban monitoring system sounds an alert.

Yo mamma so fat, most physics labs prohibit her from entering their doors (cause the lasers bend towards her).

Yo mamma so fat that, first time she set foot in Thailand, everyone ran uphill.

Yo mamma so fat, when she goes on vacation, she hires a C-130 for airlifting.

Yo mamma so heavy, if she were air-launched, she would be legally defined as a WMD.

Yo mamma so fat, her stomach lining doubles as a relativistic event horizon.

Your mamma so dumb, she tried counting the integers. Only took her half a minute to finish.

Yo mamma so dumb, she saw a guy choking, so she tried clearing his esophagus with drain-o.

Yo mamma so dumb, she looked at an oscilloscope screen and got dizzy.

Yo mamma so dumb, her PhD thesis title had the words "Lorentz attractor"...

Yo mamma so dumb, when she was working with a pendulum in an intro-physics lab, it caught on fire and killed eleven, injured fifty-six (four seriously).

Yo mamma so stupid, even John Marburger looks up to her.

Yo mamma so dumb, she taped the "ground" wire to the non-conductive floor.

Yo mamma so fat, the layers of her fat have earthquakes.

Yo mamma so fat, her fundmental resonant frequency is in the deep infransonic.

Yo mamma so dumb, her logic has been shown to violate Bell inequalities.

Yo mamma so big, an experienced surgeon got lost inside her (took three days to find a way out).

Yo mamma so heavy, she buys clothes based on their ultraviolet spectrum.

Yo mamma so heavy, she can kill a guy just by rotating about an axis.
 
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  • #42
Rach3 said:
Yo mamma's so fat, she's not allowed to visit LIGO or anywhere in a 10-mile radius.
This needs some disambiguation. While it appears you are speaking of the error introduced from momma emitting gravitational waves as she approaches LIGO, I believe a greater source of error comes from the vibrational noise caused by momma as she walks about.

Yo mamma so fat, her fundmental resonant frequency is in the deep infransonic.
(putting on best Maurice Gibb voice) How deep is her tone? The average human body resonates at infrasonic frequencies (~2 to 6 Hz). Also, this doesn't necessarily mean momma's fat. She could also be of a very low stiffness constant. In other words, yo momma's so loose, her fundamental... PS: These umm...insults are completely tasteless and degrading! For shame!
 
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  • #43
EmilK said:
Yo momma is so stupid that she though that the plum-pudding model was a diet.

Hahaha, Yo mamma is so stupid when she took a deriviative of natural log she got one over napier.

Yo mamma is so fat she farts hawking's radiation.

Yo mamma is so fat she couldn't tunnel through a well.

Yo mamma was so shocked when made love to Faraday, that he had to lock her in a cage.

Yo mamma is so fat, she is an observable.
 
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