Thread Killer Champions: Franzbear & Moonbear

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In summary, Franzbear is the most prolific thread killer in the forum. He has killed at least 12 threads and is likely responsible for 21 more. His ability to kill threads is not a direct outcome of the evidence (number of last posts). You have to at least factor in the total number of posts by each person (posts in GD) to get a more accurate representation of the killer instinct. Franz and Moonie have so many posts here, they are more likely to be the winning killers. You have to divide the number of kills by the total number of posts during the same period to get a corrected distribution.
  • #71
Moonbear said:
*jumps over coffee table and knocks over lamp lunging for Artman* Hey! Give it back! It's MY dead thread. :tongue:

FIGHT!11111 :rofl: :rofl:
 
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  • #72
<hapless fool> Ooh, what's this dilapidated cabin in the woods ? <walking in, looking for soup> Aw crap ! All it's got is this stupid altar constucted out of threads that have had their lives dragged out of them in the past. Wait a minute ...is that Wayne Gretzky by the scented cand-AAAAARGH .
 
  • #73
Gokul43201 said:
<hapless fool> Ooh, what's this dilapidated cabin in the woods ? <walking in, looking for soup> Aw crap ! All it's got is this stupid altar constucted out of threads that have had their lives dragged out of them in the past. Wait a minute ...is that Wayne Gretzky by the scented cand-AAAAARGH .
AAAARGGHHH!Artman screams, "Mother what have you done to GoKul and Tsu?"
 
  • #74
:uhh: :confused:
 
  • #75
Artman, now wearing an old lady's floor length nightgown, a hockey mask, and a pair of high healed pumps, drags the unconscious bodies (he doesn't kill people, just threads) of Tsu and Gokul over next to the altar, where he ties them up, gags them and puts lipstick on their faces (not a nice shade but a tacky red that doesn't go with their outfits).

He returns to his rocking chair and waits for another victim... :devil: :devil: :devil:

Oops too slow. He puts monique over there too.
 
  • #76
Hearing the commotion inside, Moonbear quickly checks the clip on her sig sauer and creeps to the door. She peeks through the knothole in the door and sees Tsu, Gokul and Monique unconscious on the floor, guarded by the madman wearing a hockey mask. In one swift motion, she crashes down the door to the cabin thankful that doors in horror films are always easier to break down than real doors, and takes careful aim at the madman's third shirt button.

"Back off!" She commands him, waving him toward the corner of the room. "Down on the floor...NOW!" Having faithfully watching the A-Team and MacGuyver while growing up, she is prepared with the required duct tape and handily binds and gags Artman, who is revealed when she yanks off his mask. She picks up the thread, tucks it in her inside jacket pocket and walks over to Tsu, Gokul and Monique. Keeping an eye on Artman, ready to blast off his kneecaps if he makes any sudden moves toward her or the thread, she swiftly unties the rest of the group, and instructs them, "Get on out of here! Don't look back, I've got everything under control."
 
  • #77
However, the groggy Monique, who just happened to stumble into the thread, was unaware that Artman was actually the dreaded thread cereal killer. She woke to see Moonbear tying poor Artman up and suspected that she had attacked her as well.

So when she was released from her bonds, she jumped moonbear and tied her up, and then she went over and freed Artman.
 
  • #78
But the hapless Artman, in his glee over being freed by his own captive, forgot to take the thread with him as he ran out with Monique. Moonbear still had the thread, but was left lying tied up on the floor. She started looking around and thinking to herself, "What would MacGuyver do?" Then she spotted it, the scented candle on the altar. She wriggled herself over to the altar and started to bump against it. Being a horror film, she was sure this would work. Sure enough, after one more bump, the candle tumbled to the floor, neither extinguishing itself nor setting ablaze the cloth covering the altar. She scoots around so her back is to the flame, and holds the ropes over it. She winces as she gets her hand a bit too close to the flame, readjusts her position, and thankful they used natural fiber rather than nylon rope, she quickly gets the rope burnt off, breaking it and freeing herself just before the flame on the rope spreads to her wrists. Of course, NOW the cloth on the altar catches on fire and the entire cabin is rapidly engulfed in flames as Moonbear hurriedly unties her ankles and runs out the door only moments before the entire cabin collapses.
 
  • #79
Tsu said:
FIGHT!11111 :rofl: :rofl:


MY dead thread people..

Look waht happens, i run off to a meeting on astrophysics, try to get something productive done, and already you're trying to usurp me?

I'm hurt.

ONce again, me and the single Pf women to the back of the bus with the after shock!


This thread is MINE! :devil: :devil: :devil:
 
  • #80
AAAAGHHHHH! Get TSU & Gokul out of the burning cabin!
 
  • #81
Moonbear said:
But the hapless Artman, in his glee over being freed by his own captive, forgot to take the thread with him as he ran out with Monique. Moonbear still had the thread, but was left lying tied up on the floor. She started looking around and thinking to herself, "What would MacGuyver do?" Then she spotted it, the scented candle on the altar. She wriggled herself over to the altar and started to bump against it. Being a horror film, she was sure this would work. Sure enough, after one more bump, the candle tumbled to the floor, neither extinguishing itself nor setting ablaze the cloth covering the altar. She scoots around so her back is to the flame, and holds the ropes over it. She winces as she gets her hand a bit too close to the flame, readjusts her position, and thankful they used natural fiber rather than nylon rope, she quickly gets the rope burnt off, breaking it and freeing herself just before the flame on the rope spreads to her wrists. Of course, NOW the cloth on the altar catches on fire and the entire cabin is rapidly engulfed in flames as Moonbear hurriedly unties her ankles and runs out the door only moments before the entire cabin collapses.
But to her dismay, leaving the thread inside! Meanwhile, Monique is beginning to wonder about why Artman is wearing a tacky old lady nightgown and high healed pumps. And she stops running, causing Artman to turn and see the cabin engulfed in flames.

(Oh gosh, this is getting freaky even for me.) :yuck:

Anyway, he rushes back mainly because he doesn't want all those dead threads to get hot again.

Being a horror movie, he walks into the burning cabin (the thread killer can't die, who'd do the sequel?) And grabs the smoldering thread.
 
  • #82
Evo said:
AAAAGHHHHH! Get TSU & Gokul out of the burning cabin!

:confused: What happened?? Did they run back in after I told them to leave? Noooo! :cry:

Oh, wait, it looks like the fireproof altar fell on top of them and protected them from the building collapse (it was just the cloth covering it that was flammable). I see them crawling out from under there now. They're okay, they're okay! :smile:
 
  • #83
Moonbear said:
:confused: What happened?? Did they run back in after I told them to leave? Noooo! :cry:

Oh, wait, it looks like the fireproof altar fell on top of them and protected them from the building collapse (it was just the cloth covering it that was flammable). I see them crawling out from under there now. They're okay, they're okay! :smile:
They're both trying to grab the thread for themselves. Why do you think they stayed there in the burning cabin?

And they call me crazy. Muaaaaaaa!
 
  • #84
Artman said:
They're both trying to grab the thread for themselves. Why do you think they stayed there in the burning cabin?

And they call me crazy. Muaaaaaaa!

The thread is MINE :devil: !
 
  • #85
franznietzsche said:
The thread is MINE :devil: !
Get him Mother!

Mother what have you done to poor Franz!? He was planning to party on the back of the bus and now look at him!
 
  • #86
Artman said:
Get him Mother!

Mother what have you done to poor Franz!? He was planning to party on the back of the bus and now look at him!
:devil: :devil: :devil: :devil:

Apparently there were no single PF women ready to partake in the aftershock.

:devil: :devil: :devil: :devil:
 
  • #87
What they all fail to realize is that this thread died right here, several pages ago.

https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=63689&page=3

Artman said:
Muaaaaaa! They don't suspect me! They think it's franznietzsche, but it is really me. Muaaaaaa! :devil:

I lurk in the anonymous recesses of the internet, watching and waiting for my moment to pounce. I log in, post my response, and I sit and quietly watch as the thread whithers and dies away. In a matter of hours it's over. :devil:

Oh, one or two others, franznietzsche for example, may come along and try to breath life back into it, but it is dead alright. And no amount of clever chatter can save it. Muaaaaa! :devil:

And I didn't even make the "also ran" list! :devil:
 
  • #88
  • #89
Geez, this is just pathetic. Every single one of you should be embarrassed.

Resorting to gun slinging ... cross dressing ... and WAYNE GRETZKY?! ... in a HOCKEY GOALIE MASK?! May you be banned from Canada, forever!

Seriously, taping people up with duct tape and burning down houses. And Artman, surely you've long since reached the age where you still need to call for your mommy. If I were you folks I'd be hoping this thread died ... quickly ... and be hoping no one would ever remember the horrible things you've posted on this thread.

For shame, for shame. :grumpy:
 
  • #90
BobG said:
Geez, this is just pathetic. Every single one of you should be embarrassed.

Resorting to gun slinging ... cross dressing ... and WAYNE GRETZKY?! ... in a HOCKEY GOALIE MASK?! May you be banned from Canada, forever!

Seriously, taping people up with duct tape and burning down houses. And Artman, surely you've long since reached the age where you still need to call for your mommy. If I were you folks I'd be hoping this thread died ... quickly ... and be hoping no one would ever remember the horrible things you've posted on this thread.

For shame, for shame. :grumpy:

Mine mine, the thread the thread is MINE
!

MINE, the thread is mine!
 
  • #91
franznietzsche said:
:devil: :devil: :devil: :devil:

Apparently there were no single PF women ready to partake in the aftershock.

:devil: :devil: :devil: :devil:

That's because none of us has a clue what aftershock is. :confused:

Now, I've lost track...who has the thread?
 
  • #92
Moonbear said:
That's because none of us has a clue what aftershock is. :confused:

Now, I've lost track...who has the thread?


Aftershock is 80 proof liquour. That's 40% alcohol, 20% sugar, 10%cinammon, 10%other liquid stuff. Or that's what it tastes like. The great thing with it is that if you leave it out, it solidifies into crystals, which you eat, and still get "drunk". Great great stuff.

And i have the thread, it is mine.
 
  • #93
franznietzsche said:
Aftershock is 80 proof liquour. That's 40% alcohol, 20% sugar, 10%cinammon, 10%other liquid stuff. Or that's what it tastes like. The great thing with it is that if you leave it out, it solidifies into crystals, which you eat, and still get "drunk". Great great stuff.

And i have the thread, it is mine.

What the heck is in the "other stuff" if you're still getting drunk after the alcohol evaporates? That just sounds nasty. You're not going to lure anyone into the back of the bus with you with that crud. :yuck:

*snatches thread from franz while he's double-checking the aftershock label*
 
  • #94
Moonbear said:
What the heck is in the "other stuff" if you're still getting drunk after the alcohol evaporates? That just sounds nasty. You're not going to lure anyone into the back of the bus with you with that crud. :yuck:

*snatches thread from franz while he's double-checking the aftershock label*
I'm game for some aftershock - love that stuff.

I'll just be taking this thread now. :approve:
*Yoink!*
 
  • #95
Math Is Hard said:
I'm game for some aftershock - love that stuff.

I'll just be taking this thread now. :approve:
*Yoink!*

Wrong thread! That one was tied to tribdog's...:uhh:...y'know. You better run quick before he tells you to kiss it and make it better.

The right thread was this one here. *holds up thread to show MIH and a writhing tribdog* :biggrin:
 
  • #96
Moonbear said:
Wrong thread! That one was tied to tribdog's...:uhh:...y'know. You better run quick before he tells you to kiss it and make it better.

The right thread was this one here. *holds up thread to show MIH and a writhing tribdog* :biggrin:

CURSES! I've been hornswaggled! :grumpy:
 
  • #97
Moonbear said:
What the heck is in the "other stuff" if you're still getting drunk after the alcohol evaporates? That just sounds nasty. You're not going to lure anyone into the back of the bus with you with that crud. :yuck:

*snatches thread from franz while he's double-checking the aftershock label*


No that's the point, the alcohol doesn't evaporate, it just stays in the crystals. Great stuff. And I've got a whole bottle for the upcoming party weekend. :tongue2:

My thread!

Moonbear said:
Wrong thread! That one was tied to tribdog's...y'know. You better run quick before he tells you to kiss it and make it better.

The right thread was this one here. *holds up thread to show MIH and a writhing tribdog*

*snatches the thread stabs it repeatedly* Its mine to kill, no one elses.
 
  • #98
franz said:
It's mine to kill

We'll see about that...:devil:

Daniel.
 
  • #99
franznietzsche said:
No that's the point, the alcohol doesn't evaporate, it just stays in the crystals. Great stuff. And I've got a whole bottle for the upcoming party weekend. :tongue2:

That doesn't make any sense at all. If the water evaporates, the alcohol would evaporate first. Methinks you're just getting a good sugar rush.

*snatches the thread stabs it repeatedly* Its mine to kill, no one elses.

This is a really stubborn thread to kill! At this rate, it might outlast the stupid quetion thread! :biggrin:
 
  • #100
Moonbear said:
That doesn't make any sense at all. If the water evaporates, the alcohol would evaporate first. Methinks you're just getting a good sugar rush.



This is a really stubborn thread to kill! At this rate, it might outlast the stupid quetion thread! :biggrin:


I don't think anything actually evaporates it just solidifies. It still does it with the bottle closed. It weird stuff. Of course, you could be right and it might just be that by the time we're eating the stuff we're already quite wasted anyway.
 
  • #101
Moonbear said:
Wrong thread! That one was tied to tribdog's...:uhh:...y'know. You better run quick before he tells you to kiss it and make it better.

The right thread was this one here. *holds up thread to show MIH and a writhing tribdog* :biggrin:
Yeeeewwww! Which thread have i been grabbing? Yeeeeeewwwww!
:yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck:

(Thank goodness I had that hockey mask on.)

BobG said:
Geez, this is just pathetic. Every single one of you should be embarrassed.

Resorting to gun slinging ... cross dressing ... and WAYNE GRETZKY?! ... in a HOCKEY GOALIE MASK?! May you be banned from Canada, forever!

Seriously, taping people up with duct tape and burning down houses. And Artman, surely you've long since reached the age where you still need to call for your mommy. If I were you folks I'd be hoping this thread died ... quickly ... and be hoping no one would ever remember the horrible things you've posted on this thread.

For shame, for shame.

Shameless attempt to steal the thread BobG.

Mine again. Mine, mine, mine :biggrin:
 
  • #102
Math Is Hard said:
CURSES! I've been hornswaggled! :grumpy:
You've been hornswaggled? Look how swaggled my horn is!
 
  • #103
tribdog said:
You've been hornswaggled? Look how swaggled my horn is!

I don't think I want to look. :tongue:

*grabs salad tongs and picks up thread*
 
  • #104
Moonbear said:
I don't think I want to look. :tongue:

*grabs salad tongs and picks up thread*



Gimme gimmm gimme!

Mine!

*take thread and puts it where no one will want to reach for it*
 
  • #105
franznietzsche said:
Gimme gimmm gimme!

Mine!

*take thread and puts it where no one will want to reach for it*
HEY! A-Hole! pay attention!
 
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