Why Do Female Students Listen to Male Students' Questions Without Interacting?

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A male student has been asking questions after upper-level math and physics lectures, noticing a female student listening in without engaging. He feels uncertain about her interest, as she has not approached him or asked questions. The discussion suggests that she may be shy or simply listening for clarification, and encourages him to initiate conversation about class topics. The student admits to being attracted to her but struggles with shyness, making it difficult to start a dialogue. Ultimately, the consensus is that he should take the initiative to speak with her, as it could lead to a connection.
  • #91
theoritician said:
I got the facts wrong. I covered the question except the first line and a bit. She was trying to point across the line as she read and so touched my hand as a result. It could be a subconscious thing on her behalf, indicating that she likes me.
It's rather curious how ingrained into our society Freudian concepts like the subconscious are, and since Freud's been discredited on everything else, I'm skeptical about the whole subconscious theory. I don't think there's any evidence that such a thing even really exists.
 
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  • #92
proton said:
so she's been waiting after class, and then not saying anything? I did that a few times in one of my classes because I was interested in what the professor had to say to the students.

how often does she stay after class when youre NOT there?

Maybe she's just weird or something?
We've covered this. Yes, maybe she's just weird or interested in what the prof's saying, but let's just assume that's not true. The alternative is so much more fun!
 
  • #93
JasonRox said:
Man, lying is just stupid. It's not a flirting technique. It's flat out lying and it's retarded.
...
There may be a misunderstanding here. I was talking about telling jokes. And with the exception of puns and the like, jokes are rarely truthful. Hense the phrase: "He didn't really mean it, he was only joking." I agree with your sentiment about lying and try not to do it myself. Especially when talking to girls.
 
  • #94
proton said:
so she's been waiting after class, and then not saying anything? I did that a few times in one of my classes because I was interested in what the professor had to say to the students.

how often does she stay after class when youre NOT there?

Maybe she's just weird or something?

Well for the last three times she has been waiting after class without the professor present.

I have seen her leave earlier then me.

She must be weird to go to lectures she's not enrolled in. But hey I do that as well.

Although waiting around in an almost empty lecture theatre for no reason is beyond weird. There must be a reason.
 
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  • #95
theoritician said:
Well for the last three times she has been waiting after class without the professor present.

I have seen her leave earlier then me.

She must be weird to go to lectures she's not enrolled in. But hey I do that as well.

Although waiting around in an almost empty lecture theatre for no reason is beyond weird. There must be a reason.

If she sees you not doing much (as much as she may think she's doing), she may, sooner than later, start applying the law of diminishing returns.
 
  • #96
rewebster said:
If she sees you not doing much (as much as she may think she's doing), she may, sooner than later, start applying the law of diminishing returns.

Thats right. I noticed that she was sitting less happily in her chair last time. However smiling the first two times.

I thought it was all over after she didn't attempt to make any conversation with me when I sat next to her. That is why I didn't really enjoy her touching my hand because I thought I had made a fool of myself by guessing incorrectly.
 
  • #97
Smurf said:
It's rather curious how ingrained into our society Freudian concepts like the subconscious are, and since Freud's been discredited on everything else, I'm skeptical about the whole subconscious theory. I don't think there's any evidence that such a thing even really exists.

I believe in this subconscious thing to some extent. I believe in biology and less in psychology but his subconscious theory does go in line with the jest of evolution theory.
 
  • #98
Smurf said:
It's rather curious how ingrained into our society Freudian concepts like the subconscious are, and since Freud's been discredited on everything else, I'm skeptical about the whole subconscious theory. I don't think there's any evidence that such a thing even really exists.

Are you consciously controlling the beat of your heart?
 
  • #99
theoritician said:
Thats right. I noticed that she was sitting less happily in her chair last time. However smiling the first two times.

I thought it was all over after she didn't attempt to make any conversation with me when I sat next to her. That is why I didn't really enjoy her touching my hand because I thought I had made a fool of myself by guessing incorrectly.

well, I would guess that you may not have enough interest in her, specifically, to overcome your shyness to ask her out for coffee. --and that may be your loss; because, some guys don't ever find a woman that stays around as long as she has, and waiting, for you to make a move. It sounds like if you don't do 'something' in the next few times, especially if she not enrolled in those classes, she going to be gone.
 
  • #100
My suggestion is to get over it.
 
  • #101
rewebster said:
well, I would guess that you may not have enough interest in her, specifically, to overcome your shyness to ask her out for coffee. --and that may be your loss; because, some guys don't ever find a woman that stays around as long as she has, and waiting, for you to make a move. It sounds like if you don't do 'something' in the next few times, especially if she not enrolled in those classes, she going to be gone.

Are there woman out there that make the move themselves, instead of spending so much effort waiting for the other party to make the move?

I think her primarily interest is in listening to the subjects as she listened to the prereq subjects the year before as well. So she won't be gone but will take less interest in me. In fact I think she was frowning today when I had the opportunity to talk to her but didn't and she didn't try to wait around. I take things too seriously. Must relax a bit.
 
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  • #102
theoritician said:
Are there woman out there that make the move themselves, instead of spending so much effort waiting for the other party to make the move?

Um... girls make moves all the time. Just that men are too stupid to notice. A lot of them even ask out men, so it can't get anymore obvious.

i.e. A girl at the beginning of summer told me she's looking for a sex partner but no strings attach. What does that mean? She wants me as her sex partner, duh! (Had a girlfriend at the time, and the girl was disapointed. I'll see her at school this year though. :-p)

i.e. Girl says we should hang out. She wants me.

If you actually TALK to girls and be SOCIAL with them, you'll see that girls make moves. But they only make moves on guys they want, so if you're boring, it'll never happen. You must be a man of interest, integrity and not afraid to express sexuality. I used to be shy around women and even men, but I've changed a lot over the years. Now, I can just talk to women, flirt, and put my arm around them and all that. It takes practice that's all.

You seem to expect a lot from girls when you seem to rarely ever talk to them (outside of friends and family).
 
  • #103
theoritician said:
I think her primarily interest is in listening to the subjects as she listened to the prereq subjects the year before as well. So she won't be gone but will take less interest in me. In fact I think she was frowning today when I had the opportunity to talk to her but didn't and she didn't try to wait around. I take things too seriously. Must relax a bit.

You didn't say anything?

And yes you take things too seriously, get over her. Find someone else.

Just walk up to a random girl who's waiting for class, or looking for a book in the library, eating lunch by herself, etc...
 
  • #104
theoritician said:
Are there woman out there that make the move themselves, instead of spending so much effort waiting for the other party to make the move?

Is this how you are planning to get your job when you graduate, too?--just waiting for an employer to come up to you, and ask you if you want to work for him?

do you stand outside a restaurant, waiting for someone inside to come out and ask you if you are hungry, and then ask you to sit inside and they will feed you?

theoritician said:
I think her primarily interest is in listening to the subjects as she listened to the prereq subjects the year before as well. So she won't be gone but will take less interest in me. In fact I think she was frowning today when I had the opportunity to talk to her but didn't and she didn't try to wait around. I take things too seriously. Must relax a bit.

Its not that you take things too seriously--it may be that you are one of those without an adventurous spirit-(not interested in new things, and trying new things)
 
  • #105
JasonRox said:
Um... girls make moves all the time. Just that men are too stupid to notice. A lot of them even ask out men, so it can't get anymore obvious.

i.e. A girl at the beginning of summer told me she's looking for a sex partner but no strings attach. What does that mean? She wants me as her sex partner, duh! (Had a girlfriend at the time, and the girl was disapointed. I'll see her at school this year though. :-p)

i.e. Girl says we should hang out. She wants me.

If you actually TALK to girls and be SOCIAL with them, you'll see that girls make moves. But they only make moves on guys they want, so if you're boring, it'll never happen. You must be a man of interest, integrity and not afraid to express sexuality. I used to be shy around women and even men, but I've changed a lot over the years. Now, I can just talk to women, flirt, and put my arm around them and all that. It takes practice that's all.

You seem to expect a lot from girls when you seem to rarely ever talk to them (outside of friends and family).

Actually you're right. I have had my fair share as well. I wasn't too stupid to notice but rather disinterested. But people change.

However with this girl, she dosen't want to speak at all. Thats bad when the other person is not talkative either.
 
  • #106
rewebster said:
Its not that you take things too seriously--it may be that you are one of those without an adventurous spirit-(not interested in new things, and trying new things)

You don't know how serious I feel when I am near her. However very relaxed when thinking about her. In fact its a good state to be into do some rigorous maths but not for socialising.

You're right about that adventure thing.
 
  • #107
theoritician said:
You don't know how serious I feel when I am near her. However very relaxed when thinking about her. In fact its a good state to be into do some rigorous maths but not for socialising.

You're right about that adventure thing.

Dude, you making too much out of this.

Rigorous mathematics and girls?
 
  • #108
theoritician said:
You don't know how serious I feel when I am near her. However very relaxed when thinking about her. In fact its a good state to be into do some rigorous maths but not for socialising.

You're right about that adventure thing.

It sounds like you're in that 98% of the population that listens (hears) to other peoples (good) advice but never actually follows any of it.



STEP 1) Think about the fact that you HAVE already TALKED to her (about the class, or whatever it was).

STEP 2) Since you HAVE talked to her already (and you didn't faint or keel over), talk to her again about the same stuff---'whatever' it was (logically, you won't faint or keel over, because you didn't the first time).


STEP 3) Repeat STEP 2 (over and over again, if necessary)
 
  • #109
rewebster said:
It sounds like you're in that 98% of the population that listens (hears) to other peoples (good) advice but never actually follows any of it.

But 99% of advice is bad advice.
 
  • #110
JasonRox said:
But 99% of advice is bad advice.

so out of all the posts...?
 
  • #111
So, since this is a girl talk thread, I have a question myself.

What do you guys think a 23 year old going out with an 18 year old girl?

I turned down an 18 year old just based on the fact that we couldn't go to bars together. Which was funny because she was like... "We should hang out sometime." and I'm just like... "We can go to so-and-so bar." ... and she responds ..."But I'm 18." ... and I'm just like... "And what else is there to do." (Obviously go to her house is an option. I just felt odd hooking up with a girl that can't even go to the bars.) She seemed frustrated, but oh well. She'll come see me again and be like... "I'm 19 now!" Haha.

Anyways, what do you guys think about it?

I figured it's ok now that I think about it. (Well actually it's because 50% of the girls I meet are 18-19 years old. And now I got a job where I'll be working with mostly 1st year students, so it's going to be more like 90% are going to be 18.)

I don't see the big deal now. If she's cool, she's cool.

Note: I have my eye on two girls right now and both are 21. Just that one has a boyfriend, but she doesn't seem to care. I stopped talking to her pretty much because she isn't getting anything until she ditches her boyfriend.
 
  • #112
theoritician said:
What is giong on?
You are smart; no one in this forum can or will figure it out for you.
 
  • #113
rewebster said:
It sounds like you're in that 98% of the population that listens (hears) to other peoples (good) advice but never actually follows any of it.



STEP 1) Think about the fact that you HAVE already TALKED to her (about the class, or whatever it was).

STEP 2) Since you HAVE talked to her already (and you didn't faint or keel over), talk to her again about the same stuff---'whatever' it was (logically, you won't faint or keel over, because you didn't the first time).


STEP 3) Repeat STEP 2 (over and over again, if necessary)

You might try talking about something else as well. Otherwise it'll be like "I have nothing to talk about with this guy" and if you ever do get her to go out with you, she'll flake.
 
  • #114
JasonRox said:
If you actually TALK to girls and be SOCIAL with them, you'll see that girls make moves. But they only make moves on guys they want, so if you're boring, it'll never happen. You must be a man of interest, integrity and not afraid to express sexuality. I used to be shy around women and even men, but I've changed a lot over the years. Now, I can just talk to women, flirt, and put my arm around them and all that. It takes practice that's all.

You seem to expect a lot from girls when you seem to rarely ever talk to them (outside of friends and family).

I've realized there is quite some truths in your statement. I use to laugh at people who try to be sociable in a mix sex environment but now they are the people laughing at me (including you I'd imagine).
 
  • #115
JasonRox said:
So, since this is a girl talk thread, I have a question myself.

What do you guys think a 23 year old going out with an 18 year old girl?

I turned down an 18 year old just based on the fact that we couldn't go to bars together. Which was funny because she was like... "We should hang out sometime." and I'm just like... "We can go to so-and-so bar." ... and she responds ..."But I'm 18." ... and I'm just like... "And what else is there to do." (Obviously go to her house is an option. I just felt odd hooking up with a girl that can't even go to the bars.) She seemed frustrated, but oh well. She'll come see me again and be like... "I'm 19 now!" Haha.

Anyways, what do you guys think about it?

I figured it's ok now that I think about it. (Well actually it's because 50% of the girls I meet are 18-19 years old. And now I got a job where I'll be working with mostly 1st year students, so it's going to be more like 90% are going to be 18.)

I don't see the big deal now. If she's cool, she's cool.

Note: I have my eye on two girls right now and both are 21. Just that one has a boyfriend, but she doesn't seem to care. I stopped talking to her pretty much because she isn't getting anything until she ditches her boyfriend.

Are you talking on a Hedonistic level?; or being a 19-year old, is she smart/mature/(she hasn't experienced enough of the world as you) enough for you (being a 23 year old?); or do you only date women that YOU'RE interested in (and not vice-versa)?
 
  • #116
theoritician said:
I've realized there is quite some truths in your statement. I use to laugh at people who try to be sociable in a mix sex environment but now they are the people laughing at me (including you I'd imagine).

The more you 'feel' isolated, less the chance you'll mingle------


She's wondering if you have any thing to offer to her (conversation, companionship, etc.)-----Do you?


You're carrying on a conservation --here--------if you would talk to her (even) as much as you've posted---I wouldn't see a problem
 
  • #117
rewebster said:
do you only date women that YOU'RE interested in (and not vice-versa)?

Of course I only date women I AM interested in. Duh, why would I date someone I'm not interested in.

Oh, and not in the Hedonistic level. Just for fun and chills.
 
  • #118
JasonRox said:
Of course I only date women I AM interested in. Duh, why would I date someone I'm not interested in.

Oh, and not in the Hedonistic level. Just for fun and chills.

that IS the Hedonistic level




and as far as the "DUH" statement, a lot of women date men to FIND OUT whether or not they are interested in YOU (generic 'you', "men")---that 'word' "interested" often means a different thing to some women (as it sounds pretty specific to you).
 
  • #119
rewebster said:
and as far as the "DUH" statement, a lot of women date men to FIND OUT whether or not they are interested in YOU (generic 'you', "men")---

That might be your experience, but it's not mine. If I'm on a date with a girl, I'm interested and she's interested. End of story.

Yeah, that is the Hedonistic sense, but I mean pleasure is not the focus.
 
  • #120
JasonRox said:
That might be your experience, but it's not mine. If I'm on a date with a girl, I'm interested and she's interested. End of story.

Yeah, that is the Hedonistic sense, but I mean pleasure is not the focus.

In Hedonism, PLEASURE is the focus

are you thinking 'heathenism' by mistake?
 

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