Confess Your Sins to PF: Embarrassing Tales Welcome!

[Gale]

well, I'm a pretty bad girl, so there are lots of things i could probably confess to, but most of it is probably pretty scandalous.

one i'll share though...

sophomore year in history we had a final paper that had to be at least 5 pages long on anything in history we wanted. I wasn't very fond of the teacher or class... and plus i was a brat.

so, there was a running joke about my teacher's sexuality... so i decided my paper would be on "Gay's in History." i started my paper with a very formal paragraph that sounded very serious and all that. Then i broke into this fictional story about a gay juggler and his suicidal lover, and ended up with the origin of the rainbow as a gay symbol... then i added some fake quotes from fake professors. tossed in a completely random, obscure, but entirely factual paragraph about pineapples, and then concluded with a list of famous gays and random facts about them. last page was a bibliography, with actual resources i had used, including the pineapple one.

I passed in the paper, and he gave me a zero... which brought my final grade down from a B to a D. so i complained and told him that based on his grading requirements, i deserved at least a 50 on the paper. his requirements were like, 10 pts grammar and spelling, (i had perfect grammar and spelling) 20 pts annotated bilbiography, (i had that as well,) 20 pts creativity and voice, (definetly had that) 30 pts historical content, (i did have the pineapple thing... but mostly nothing else,) 20 pts logical thesis and supporting research, (ya, none...)

he ended up giving me the 50, but being very very annoyed about it. it was a pretty funny paper, all the funnier because i got a somewhat decent grade... sorta... anyways, i feel sort of bad now. sorta...

 

[BobG]

I was very distracted by the art books. How do you think I got as far as I did in school? I rarely did any homework. Just pulled something out at the last minute.

Pampered too. When we did require assistance in pulling something out, we didn't get something as nice as expositories - we just had plain old enemas.

Uh, wait a minute - either you're using the wrong word or else I finally understand why the Montreal Expos were such a failure.

 

[JamesU]

well, I'm a pretty bad girl, so there are lots of things i could probably confess to, but most of it is probably pretty scandalous.

one i'll share though...

sophomore year in history we had a final paper that had to be at least 5 pages long on anything in history we wanted. I wasn't very fond of the teacher or class... and plus i was a brat.

so, there was a running joke about my teacher's sexuality... so i decided my paper would be on "Gay's in History." i started my paper with a very formal paragraph that sounded very serious and all that. Then i broke into this fictional story about a gay juggler and his suicidal lover, and ended up with the origin of the rainbow as a gay symbol... then i added some fake quotes from fake professors. tossed in a completely random, obscure, but entirely factual paragraph about pineapples, and then concluded with a list of famous gays and random facts about them. last page was a bibliography, with actual resources i had used, including the pineapple one.

I passed in the paper, and he gave me a zero... which brought my final grade down from a B to a D. so i complained and told him that based on his grading requirements, i deserved at least a 50 on the paper. his requirements were like, 10 pts grammar and spelling, (i had perfect grammar and spelling) 20 pts annotated bilbiography, (i had that as well,) 20 pts creativity and voice, (definetly had that) 30 pts historical content, (i did have the pineapple thing... but mostly nothing else,) 20 pts logical thesis and supporting research, (ya, none...)

he ended up giving me the 50, but being very very annoyed about it. it was a pretty funny paper, all the funnier because i got a somewhat decent grade... sorta... anyways, i feel sort of bad now. sorta...

how did you include a paragraph aboutpineapples in a paper about gays?

 

[matthyaouw]

so i decided my paper would be on "Gay's in History."
(i had perfect grammar and spelling)

Are you sure?

 

[Artman]

either you're using the wrong word or else I finally understand why the Montreal Expos were such a failure.

My lack of spelling ability reminds me of another thing that I need to confess:

I changed the lettering of my grade school sign (20 feet in the air on the side of the building, I had to shimmy up a drain pipe ). Suffice it to say I can't write it here.

 

[dextercioby]

how did you include a paragraph aboutpineapples in a paper about gays?

You don't want to know... : Oh and that zucchini...

Daniel.

 

[JamesU]

okay, I've got it... [grossed out sarchasm]thenks dextercioby[/GOS]

 

[1123581321]

I once broke a kids arm, and then knocked him out by putting him in the sleeper hold, but he was asking for it, he tried to take my money.

another time, i broke a chickens neck, just to see if they really run around for a while after you do it.

another time, i put itching powder on the nozzle of some kids axe, and he sprayed it all over himself, it was funny, but he had it comming.

another time, i got into the school's computer system, and made a porn slideshow in some kids file folder

Fibonacci

edit: i feel no remorse, I'm going to hell (the 9th level)

 

[JamesU]

how do you perform the sleeper hold? (I've always wondered)

 

[Gale]

how did you include a paragraph aboutpineapples in a paper about gays?

You don't want to know... : Oh and that zucchini...

Daniel.

Actually... no. you're such a perv daniel. The paragraph about pineapples was completely random. the paper was like... made up gay stuff... more gay stuff... more gay stuff... Pineapples were often used as door decorations to welcome sailors home after long voyages... then some more fictional gay stuff... it was funnier that way. my teacher circled the whole paragraph in my paper and then wrote lots of explanation points and question marks...

and ya... my spelling and grammar in the paper was excellent... i don't pretend that it is all the time.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

Actually... no. you're such a perv daniel. The paragraph about pineapples was completely random. the paper was like... made up gay stuff... more gay stuff... more gay stuff... Pineapples were often used as door decorations to welcome sailors home after long voyages... then some more fictional gay stuff... it was funnier that way. my teacher circled the whole paragraph in my paper and then wrote lots of explanation points and question marks...

and ya... my spelling and grammar in the paper was excellent... i don't pretend that it is all the time.

Lol... that's absolutely beautiful. I did similar things but never with a serious report. I was made to read a terrible piece of crap in one of my english classes and then was asked to find a paragraph and write an essay describing the symbolism and so forth. It was such a worthless book that I couldn't find a paragraph worth writing about so I decided to write a mock Freudian analysis of one instead. That was fun and I think it totally went over the teachers head.

 

[Gale]

you think that was good?

for english class, same year, (hmm... maybe i was just an especially big brat that year...) we had to do some biography project. I'm not even sure what the point of the project was... but meh. At any rate, i didn't know who i wanted to do, and everyone in class picked all the cool people... (actually, i don't think i cared...) so i decided to make someone up. I went onto google images and typed in geek or nerd or something. found a picture of some random guy, printed it out, named hime Phillip... uh... something, i forget now. i said he was some rocket scientist or something, that he worked in a government think tank and umm... to fill up space on the poster i made, i drew an exceptionally large pi symbol, and wrote that ole phil had calculated 100 didgits of pi, by hand, when he was 11. the poster was horrible, the facts were stupid and made up... when i presented the project, i just kept rambling about how cool math was... my teacher didn't understand a thing... she gave me an A... even i was impressed with myself.

 

[JamesU]

that is cool. you got an A for making some random guy named philip and blabbed about math until your teacher was confused? awesome

 

[Huckleberry]

I regret a lot of things, but I wouldn't consider many of them sins, just my own ignorance. One thing I do regret that I would consider a sin is the time I hit my sister. I was about 13 and she was 11. She would invite her friends over and then she would tease me in front of them and they would laugh. That made me very angry. One day I decided I was going to read her journal and see if she wrote anything about me in there. So I found her journal and she saw me and tried to take it back. I held it over my head and she was hitting me and scratching me. She wasn't really hurting me though, but I hit her in the stomach and she crumpled on the floor and started crying. Then I locked myself in the bathroom and read her journal. She was at the door crying the whole time. There was nothing in there about me. I unlocked the door and gave it back to her. I don't remember apologizing at that time. I felt sick.

Last Thanksgiving I was at my aunts house. My sister was there. Somehow in conversation my sister said that I used to hit her all the time. I was angry again because that is not at all true. We used to have arguments and did the pushing thing, but I don't ever remember hitting her except that one time. One time too many. But she remembers differently. I didn't defend myself when she said that I hit her repeatedly as a child when she said it in front of my entire family. I figured that Thanksgiving wasn't a good time for an argument and it wasn't meant for everyone to listen to.

I have since apologised to her. I still feel like a creep for ever hitting a girl out of anger even if I was only 13. There was no excuse for it.

 

[icvotria]

I have since apologised to her. I still feel like a creep for ever hitting a girl out of anger even if I was only 13. There was no excuse for it.

You didn't hit a girl, you hit your sister, it's different. Me and my brother used to have fights all the time. It wouldn't've been fair if he didn't hit back and I usually deserved it

I remembered something bad I did last night when I was running a virus scan. I once sent an email to Paul Daniels, a creepy tv magician from England who used to have this show called Wizbit where he played the part of a big magic yellow cone who lived with a giant rabbit *shudder * I made up this big sob story, with some really awful stuff, and said that the only thing that got me through it all was him and his box sets. ( it made me laugh at the time...) A couple of days later, he replied! Woo! Only in the email, he told me about all the tragic aspects of his life and was really solemn and caring. It made me feel awful.

Anyway, last night I found out he'd emailed me a virus! The moral: don't trick a trickster.

 

[1123581321]

how do you perform the sleeper hold? (I've always wondered)

go to google and type "sleeper hold"
or perhaps some kind of wrestling/judo/jujitsu website.
i don't know what its called in Japanese, so you may be better off looking at a wrestling site instead of judo/jujitsu.

Fibonacci

unless you know japanese

 

[JamesU]

You didn't hit a girl, you hit your sister, it's different. Me and my brother used to have fights all the time. It wouldn't've been fair if he didn't hit back and I usually deserved it

I remembered something bad I did last night when I was running a virus scan. I once sent an email to Paul Daniels, a creepy tv magician from England who used to have this show called Wizbit where he played the part of a big magic yellow cone who lived with a giant rabbit *shudder * I made up this big sob story, with some really awful stuff, and said that the only thing that got me through it all was him and his box sets. ( it made me laugh at the time...) A couple of days later, he replied! Woo! Only in the email, he told me about all the tragic aspects of his life and was really solemn and caring. It made me feel awful.

Anyway, last night I found out he'd emailed me a virus! The moral: don't trick a trickster.

email him a virus back...

 

[Huckleberry]

My sister isn't a girl? I knew it!

Hey, are you sure that magician guy intentionally sent a virus to you? Maybe he got it from someone else that didn't like him.

 

[Moonbear]

how did you include a paragraph aboutpineapples in a paper about gays?

Well, someone did claim Sponge Bob Squarepants is gay, right? And he lives in a pineapple under the sea, right? Well, there you go, it's a natural connection of course.

 

[Evo]

Oh, I remember something I did in grade school.

We were supposed to write a book report and make an art project that represented what we were writing about. I was going to do a report on a book that had a bull as the main character. I started making a papier mache bull, but it turned out horrible. I only had a day left, and I ended up making a white french poodle, it was beautiful, the problem was I didn't have a book about a white french poodle to do a report on, so I made up a book.

I turned in the fake book report and poodle. It was a hit. Unfortunately, my teacher thought some of us did outstanding work and contacted the public library, they decided it would be great to showcase the reports and art projects in the front entrance of the library. My poodle and report were among three chosen. The library planned to also display the book our project was based on for people that would like to read it. The library said they couldn't find my book and wanted to make sure the name and author were correct because they had no record of either (rut roh) I made up the book name and for the author I used my brother's first and middle name. I decided to play the dumb 10 year old and got all teary and told them it had been awhile since I had read the book, and I was pretty sure that was correct, but maybe not. They displayed it anyway.

 

[Mk]

Great work, I must say.

I did that kind of thing in 8th grade, we had to do a book report that I mysteriously didn't know about. It was to be done in class. I ended up writing about a book I read a few weeks previously. My best friend pretty much gave up, he didn't know about it either. I told him to make up a book, and he said it was a great idea.

We both got As! Yay!

 

[Huckleberry]

I did a few book reports in high school for money. Is that a sin or just good business?

 

[brewnog]

You didn't hit a girl, you hit your sister, it's different. Me and my brother used to have fights all the time. It wouldn't've been fair if he didn't hit back and I usually deserved it

Absolutely. My sister used to use some horrifically dirty tactics when we were fighting. She deserved all those bruises.

blah blah blah, this show called Wizbit, blah blah blah...

Would you PLEASE stop going on about that stupid irritating fluffy yellow triangle? It does my nut in! Every time you mention it I just start singing "ah ah this-a-way, ah ah that-a-way, ah ah this-a-way..." and I'm SICK of it! You deserve every virus (computer or otherwise) which Paul Daniels could ever give you!

 

[Mk]

I did a few book reports in high school for money. Is that a sin or just good business?

Uhm? Both?

A few? I did tons!

 

[Physics_wiz]

Hmm I really did a LOT of bad stuff...really a LOT...nothing really bad but I still did the small stuff all the time.

Here's one thing I feel bad about tho: I was offered a bit of money to make final projects for 3 friends in my high school programming class. I was pretty good at it so it didn't take me nearly as much time as it woulda taken them. I ended up doing their projects which were kindda fun actually (They were all games). My project was minesweeper and I ended up doing a few other games. The one thing I feel bad about tho...I didn't accept the money they offered ...I was such a moron two years ago .

 

[icvotria]

Oi!

blah blah blah, this show called Wizbit, blah blah blah...

You deserve every virus (computer or otherwise) which Paul Daniels could ever give you!

I was going to put some psychic luck on the train over to Manchester for you tomorrow morning but now I'm not gonna.



Humph. That'll teach him.