God, you're dumb and you're a WHAT?

[rachmaninoff]

No phone number, business address? Nice, profitable document-forgery scheme they have going there.

Interesting story here; one of these 'institutions' gave an MBA to a cat:

http://www.turnto10.com/news/3976875/detail.html

 

[ShawnD]

MIH should use that cat picture as her new avatar.

 

[rachmaninoff]

A senior Homeland Security director was brought down in '03, her 'doctorate' being from an fradulent online college:

http://www.washingtontechnology.com/news/1_1/daily_news/20849-1.html

 

[Gokul43201]

A : God, you're dumb... and you're a WHAT?

B : I'm a politician. They call me Mr. President !

 

[Moonbear]

well it IS pretty hard to explain it to anyone without getting into talk about magic water elves that swim under boats to hold them up in the water, because then everyone wants to know how the US governemnt got those elves to work for us, and then labor laws come up, and then PETA gets involved and then issues about black market elf sales and all of that... so schools have started making up this "bouyancy" stuff that's taught just before an exam so it never properly gets covered, and everyone forgets quickly, and so the mass population can remain blissfully ignorant. unfortunately, you're friend was a clever one, and still managed to ponder the ellusive question of floating metal.

You must have graduated from one of the more prestigious 5-day programs to know so much!

I should mention that these are students in the final semester of chemistry. After this semester, they'll be real chemistry employees doing real tests like sampling the water you drink and the air you breathe. I find that scary.

Or they go on to med school. The more med students I teach, the more afraid I am to go to a doctor. Sure, there are plenty of good students, but then you run into the few who just leave you wondering how they got into med school and why they are still there. One can only hope they won't pass their boards so can't actually practice medicine.

 

[Tony11235]

Don't forget ITT-Technical Institute.

 

[Math Is Hard]

MIH should use that cat picture as her new avatar.

Excellent idea, Shawn.
Thanks.

 

[tribdog]

:
Or they go on to med school. .

or they start experimenting on sheep

 

[Pengwuino]

In the environmental laboratory, one student was trying to argue that a cubic meter and a litre were the same thing.

Why didn't you grab a meter stick and a soda bottle? Then hit her upside the head with both.

 

[Pengwuino]

For an additional $99 fee, investigators said the agent requested the cat's transcript. The document arrived with Colby's graduation date, student number and a GPA of 3.5.

That cat's smarter then me :(

 

[Moonbear]

Why didn't you grab a meter stick and a soda bottle?

I was going to suggest the same thing...

Then hit her upside the head with both.

...but obviously hadn't thought it through to the best use of each object.

 

[Cosmo16]

I'm 17- and in an advanced Englsh/ History class. (Same kids in each class) These kids (who have higher GPA's then I do) Say some things that make you go. "Ahhhh ya"

My favorite is when a girl in my history class asked my teacher what the "Aforementioned acts" did. She belived they were a new set of acts she had never learned. Like the Stamp Act.

 

[GCT]

B : I'm a politician. They call me Mr. President !

c'mon he's not that dumb, although too much drinking may have impaired his verbal abilities somewhat. His SAT scores were not that bad, at least for the standards at the time (percentile).

 

[franznietzsche]

c'mon he's not that dumb, although too much drinking may have impaired his verbal abilities somewhat. His SAT scores were not that bad, at least for the standards at the time (percentile).

I always laugh at people who keep calling Bush dumb. Dangerous, yeah. Dumb? Nope. The reason the Democrats lost the election is because they were the dumb ones who kept underestimating him. And so i keep laughing at people who call him stupid. And cry because their stupidity is going to screw us all.

 

[ShawnD]

I always laugh at people who keep calling Bush dumb. Dangerous, yeah. Dumb? Nope. The reason the Democrats lost the election is because they were the dumb ones who kept underestimating him. And so i keep laughing at people who call him stupid. And cry because their stupidity is going to screw us all.

He also managed to win an election in which he ran as the common man, despite the fact that he's both Harvard and Yale educated, is a multimillionaire, and his father was at one time the most powerful man in the world. Brilliant.

 

[Pengwuino]

He also managed to win an election in which he ran as the common man, despite the fact that he's both Harvard and Yale educated, is a multimillionaire, and his father was at one time the most powerful man in the world. Brilliant.

he ran as the common man?

 

[scott1]

well it IS pretty hard to explain it to anyone without getting into talk about magic water elves that swim under boats to hold them up in the water, because then everyone wants to know how the US government got those elves to work for us, and then labor laws come up, and then PETA gets involved and then issues about black market elf sales and all of that... so schools have started making up this "buoyancy" stuff that's taught just before an exam so it never properly gets covered, and everyone forgets quickly, and so the mass population can remain blissfully ignorant. unfortunately, you're friend was a clever one, and still managed to ponder the ellusive question of floating metal.

Your wrong they don't have the magic water elves swimming holding the boat it's actually the PETA guys swimming under the boat and holding it. The magic water elves are used to teach kids about "buoyancy" and because there magic water elves and kids think they make toys for Santa so he can deliver it on Christmas(But Santa actually the NASA agent that does that secret spying stuff...)they listen to them about "buoyancy".

 

[franznietzsche]

He also managed to win an election in which he ran as the common man, despite the fact that he's both Harvard and Yale educated, is a multimillionaire, and his father was at one time the most powerful man in the world. Brilliant.

Well here's the kicker. How many people think Bush give's a rats posterior about gay marriage? How many people seriously believe that it matters one iota to him? The whole point of pushing to constitutionally ban gay marriage was to drive fundamentalists to the polls on election day. NOTHING else. And while they were there, why not vote for Bush too... It was really a clever plan. Notice how the issue was pretty much dropped afterwards? He doesn't care. He played the fundamentalists for fools. But the democratic party was too busy calling him stupid to catch on and counter that move, and they lost, quite decisively, compared to 2000, even compared to Clinton's victories.

 

[phcatlantis]

Does the tone of this thread strike anyone else as similar to JP's from Grandma's Boy?

 

[Manchot]

He also managed to win an election in which he ran as the common man, despite the fact that he's both Harvard and Yale educated, is a multimillionaire, and his father was at one time the most powerful man in the world. Brilliant.

He also managed to be an alcoholic cokehead.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

Well here's the kicker. How many people think Bush give's a rats posterior about gay marriage? How many people seriously believe that it matters one iota to him? The whole point of pushing to constitutionally ban gay marriage was to drive fundamentalists to the polls on election day. NOTHING else. And while they were there, why not vote for Bush too... It was really a clever plan. Notice how the issue was pretty much dropped afterwards? He doesn't care. He played the fundamentalists for fools. But the democratic party was too busy calling him stupid to catch on and counter that move, and they lost, quite decisively, compared to 2000, even compared to Clinton's victories.

I bet he really blew away his campaign managers when he came up with the idea too huh?

 

[Pengwuino]

He also managed to be an alcoholic cokehead.

Man you sure do swallow whatever propaganda is forced down your throat eh

 

[Manchot]

Man you sure do swallow whatever propaganda is forced down your throat eh

Do you dispute the fact that he was an alcoholic, or the fact that he did cocaine? The former has been well-substantiated, and the latter was implied by those tapes that his former friend released a year ago.

 

[Pengwuino]

Do you dispute the fact that he was an alcoholic, or the fact that he did cocaine? The former has been well-substantiated, and the latter was implied by those tapes that his former friend released a year ago.

no proof of the latter. 0. None. propaganda.

 

[Manchot]

no proof of the latter. 0. None. propaganda.

http://www.cnn.com/2005/ALLPOLITICS/02/21/bush.tapes/

"The cocaine thing, let me tell you my strategy on that," Bush said on the tape. "Rather than saying no ... I think it's time for someone to draw the line and look people in the eye and say, you know, 'I'm not going to participate in ugly rumors about me and blame my opponent,' and hold the line. Stand up for a system that will not allow this kind of crap to go on."

He refuses to deny using cocaine, and he refuses to deny using any drugs before 1974 (though he does deny it for the years following). He also decided to stop going to National Guard a month after they announced that they were going to do cocaine tests. It's not definite proof (i.e., it wouldn't hold up in court), but the writing's clearly on the wall. Why would he refuse to deny using cocaine, but does deny using any drugs after 1974, if he didn't think that there was a chance that it could come back to bite him?

 

[ShawnD]

Wasn't alcoholism the reason he became a born again christian? I remember hearing this, or hearing it implied. Not sure if it's true.

I never actually noticed that they completely dropped the gay marriage thing after the election. That was one hell of an awesome plan. Split the country in half on a fundamental issue and place yourself on the side you think has more voters. Divide and conquer.

And yes he did somewhat run as the common man. He loved to be on TV when he was at his real Texas ranch. When he choked on a pretzel he felt it was necessary to include that he watches football, unlike the other candidates who only watch polo as they stroke their beards, cluck their tongues, and ask "what is to be done with this George Bush".

 

[franznietzsche]

I never actually noticed that they completely dropped the gay marriage thing after the election. That was one hell of an awesome plan. Split the country in half on a fundamental issue and place yourself on the side you think has more voters. Divide and conquer.

Honestly, i hate to credit any politician with possession of a cerebral cortex but it was a damn clever move. So while John Kerry was going on national TV making an ass out of himself saying "The W in George W. Bush stands for Wrong!" Bush and co. were busy planning a victory, which they got.

And yes he did somewhat run as the common man. He loved to be on TV when he was at his real Texas ranch. When he choked on a pretzel he felt it was necessary to include that he watches football, unlike the other candidates who only watch polo as they stroke their beards, cluck their tongues, and ask "what is to be done with this George Bush".

Bush has always tried to portray himself, especially to fundamentalist southerners, as 'one of the gang.'

I bet he really blew away his campaign managers when he came up with the idea too huh?

The distinction between a man smart enough to surround himself with smarter people, and one smart enough to do all their jobs himself is one without a difference.

I don't like Bush either. But until the Democrats learn one of the most basic principles of strategy, which is to NEVER underestimate your opponent, to ALWAYS assume that your opponents are smarter, stronger, and better funded, they will continue to lose elections. Plain and simple. Trying to ride on republican incompetence will get them no where, because they are easily just as incompetent.

 

[GCT]

The distinction between a man smart enough to surround himself with smarter people, and one smart enough to do all their jobs himself is one without a difference.

I can certainly agree with that, Bush has many friends, many qualified people who would give a limb for the well paid jobs and the prestigious position...who don't mind bush being a bit naive and the friendlier of characters, and who aren't dumb enough to take advantage of him (since he's doesn't play the faction game, so he's the sort of a middle man, in addition he has some powerful close relatives, who genuinely care for his well-being. Not to mention some powerful religious individuals with whom both share good ol' mutual trust). So perhaps the most powerful of people are naive, have pure morals, and have close powerful relatives.

Every time someone criticizes Bush's intelligence, particularly through the media, there'll be sympathetic and perhaps more determined individuals who feel the need to show him support. In truth, it's not appropriate to explicitly call anyone stupid; not your friends, peers, parents, especially not the president. Honestly I don't know how this idea caught on, because you don't see it everyday. So you call a friendly, genuine, naive man (seemingly) stupid, write books about his stupidity, criticize it in front of national television-really, what's the point of that? A nation isn't going to abandon Bush, because in the past, people have been more sensitive to manipulation and they feared for their lives. People see how Bush "innocently" takes these criticisms, and at times he seems to be affected by it. As long as he doesn't crumble under it (and how utterly sad that would be), I'm sure he can make is as president indefinitely (if there were indefinite terms).

 

[zoobyshoe]

Your wrong they don't have the magic water elves swimming holding the boat it's actually the PETA guys swimming under the boat and holding it. The magic water elves are used to teach kids about "buoyancy" and because there magic water elves and kids think they make toys for Santa so he can deliver it on Christmas(But Santa actually the NASA agent that does that secret spying stuff...)they listen to them about "buoyancy".

You've been reading too many paranormal/conspiracy websites, or something. If you simply go back and read the original Archimeliees, buoyancy is explained in perfectly logical, rational terms. Check out, for instance, proposition 4 of "On Elven Support Of Bodies In Water": a solid immersed in fluid will be prevented from sinking if there be any local water elves thereabouts who do not wish it to clutter the bottom of the body of water. These will exert an upward magic thrust on the solid via spell or incantation in direct proportion to their desire to be rid of it.

 

[Blahness]

Man, and I was trying to entertain myself at school with the thought of what people around me were likely to become in life.

You ruined my daydreams. ;_;'