I want to give advice where are all your relationship problems?

[Cyrus]

He is a Republican

I must... resist ...the ...urge... to ...say: I was very liberal with your mother last night. Hiyooo.

 

[Pengwuino]

that's very true.

In other news, I do have the next big thing: it only needs an investment of $5000 and you'll make ten times that back in 7 months!

Who do I make it out to?

I must... resist ...the ...urge... to ...say: I was very liberal with your mother last night. Hiyooo.

+1.

 

[jackmell]

there is a girl in my class and i am going to talk to her tomorrow and i need help with what to say to her. i want her to be my girlfriend. i am nervous already! my heart is beating fast again and I'm shaking!

That's a big deal for you isn't it, even though it's just a few words placed obscurely among all the comments, criticisms, and advice in this thread. You mean you are attracted to her and would like to be with her right? Gotta' get that "girlfriend" thing outta' your mind for now though. Crawl before you can walk, and just talk, don't show your intentions, rather just talk to her about something, class, weather, sports, her hair, jewelry she's wearing, the tough problem you couldn't do but maybe she could help you with, whatever but nothing girlfriend or boyfriend, then just leave it there, days go by, may say a thing or two more, smile, engage, also try to dress well and sharp as a tack, smell nice, and then, depending how she responds to you, ask her out for a hamburger or something. She may drag one or two of her friends with her. That's ok.

Oh yeah, I should mention if she's not interested then that's it ok. Still be nice and friendly to her but make no more moves on her. Guys get rejected all the time, even a good-looking guy like me. I mean not often, but it happens.

 

[nucleargirl]

there is a girl in my class and i am going to talk to her tomorrow and i need help with what to say to her. i want her to be my girlfriend. i am nervous already! my heart is beating fast again and I'm shaking!

yeah def talk to her first before asking her to be gf - you don't know the girl! she might not be who you think she is.
Be friends first so you know she's nice, then see how things go from there.
and its less pressure on you, one step at a time.

 

[jackmell]

Also I should mention, and this is for guys only cus' it's sorta' secrete guy stuff, if she can't look at you without smiling then I think it's a pretty good indication she finds you attractive, at least your looks for now. But if she looks at you like she's suffering from a thorn in her side, then she's probably just not into you. However, if she's shy or strong-willed, she may try and hide her feelings and try not to smile.

So go back and engage her and tell us if she was smiling or not. But that's a tough thing to do isn't it, especially if you're shy. Look, just ask her about some class homework or whatever just to make a small mark. Not trying to score big here at this stage of the game alright? Just want to get your foot in the door and show her you acknowledge her existence. Good I think to let things like this "simmer" over multiple engagements over some time and always, always, be careful to back off if she gives you any hint you're bothering her.

 

[cronxeh]

Jack, are you a virgin?

 

[Topher925]

I need dating advice! My problem is that I can't find a girl that I actually want to date. All the ones I meet fall under one of these categories:

1. astonishingly stupid
2. religious
3. has children
4. >50 bmi
5. only goals in life are to get hammered and be rich
6. a combination of the above

So where can a bachelor go to meet smart ambitious girls that don't fall into one of the above categories?

 

[anubis01]

I need dating advice! My problem is that I can't find a girl that I actually want to date. All the ones I meet fall under one of these categories:

1. astonishingly stupid
2. religious
3. has children
4. >50 bmi
5. only goals in life are to get hammered and be rich
6. a combination of the above

So where can a bachelor go to meet smart ambitious girls that don't fall into one of the above categories?

Fantasy Land?

In all seriousness though there isn't exactly a place where you can meet gorgeous young woman with a solid path to a good career. Your just going to have to keep on looking until you find "that gem".

 

[jackmell]

Jack, are you a virgin?

Why don't you offer something constructive then that's better than what I suggested if his goal is to just meet her and talk to her, and not have sex as quick as possible.

 

[Office_Shredder]

5. only goals in life are to get hammered and be rich

Why are you ruling out 99% of the human race?

 

[cronxeh]

Why don't you offer something constructive that may be helpful to him, and if it involves criticizing me then just do it for goodness sake rather than beat around the bush.

I like your advise and I agree with most of it, but it will land him in the friendzone. If she hasn't noticed him yet, he has to be noticed by her. She has to be pursuing him in her mind even if she doesn't show it. At high school level this is best done by either being a prep or a jock. Cultivating multiple female friendships and being 'seen' hanging out with them while the particular girl in question is in the viewing angle. She has to notice you, think about you and then initiate the contact.

By chasing her, you are likely to either end up in friendzone or simply waste so much time/energy/money trying to serenade an already horny teenager.

 

[Topher925]

Why are you ruling out 99% of the human race?

I dunno, probably cause I don't like to tolerate that 99% of the human race.

 

[nucleargirl]

ahem... this post was deleted cos it might cause some offence to the above poster... sorry! don't mean to freak you out! I'll stop!

 

[nucleargirl]

...:( nobody's posting anymore...
I could start a monologue! but it would make me look even more sad...
everyone's probably got interesting things to do in their lives... well I dont! not right now! I'm not in the mood!

 

[jackmell]

I need dating advice! My problem is that I can't find a girl that I actually want to date. All the ones I meet fall under one of these categories:

1. astonishingly stupid
2. religious
3. has children
4. >50 bmi
5. only goals in life are to get hammered and be rich
6. a combination of the above

So where can a bachelor go to meet smart ambitious girls that don't fall into one of the above categories?

(1) What's wrong with stupid as long as she has a smokin' bod?

(2) . . . ugh . . . does she have a nice bod?

(3) How many, how long ago, and what's her bod look like now?

(4) . . . no comment.

(5) . . . ugh . . . what were we talkin' aboub?

I'm jokin' of course, I mean women are more than just bodies anyway. I could think of a bunch other nice things they're good for. So my advice to finding smart, attractive, healthy, ambitious, strong women is go to college. If you're out of school, then hey how about a course or two for fun.

Also, gotta' lot of women in those writing forums. Yeah, they like to write and all. I guess that could happen. The club thing is a bad thing huh? Yeah, maybe so. How about on-line in one of the umteen sites people get together explicitly for relationships?

 

[BobG]

be honset with her and she will appreciate it. If you don't insult her in anyway, and just tell her that you like her as a person (she's a good person) but you only see her as a friend and nothing more, and that you hope that you telling her all this won't affect you friendship, then hopefully if she's a big enough person, she will accept graciously and it won't be awkward between you two in future. If things do turn awkward, I still think it is the right thing to do on your behalf, and then I guess you just have to deal wiht the awkwardness... that's how she reacts, not your fault.

So what are you trying to say? If she's fat, she's used to being rejected? What horribly insensitive advice!

But I do have to credit you with at least a little insight. You were perceptive enough to realize that no one with a centerfold type body would be interested in someone so nerdy that they'd ask such a lame question. Although, in its own way, that's kind of insensitive and insulting to just assume that the person asking is a nerd - or maybe it's just insensitive and insulting to come right out and say he's a nerd, since his nerdiness is a little too obvious to just ignore.

Where's Cyrus? He gives much more tender, sensitive answers than you.

 

[BobG]

ahem... this post was deleted cos it might cause some offence to the above poster... sorry! don't mean to freak you out! I'll stop!

Just another example of your insensitivity. It was only one poster that might have taken offense. You denied pleasure to every other forum member just to spare the feelings of one poster.

But this is Topher we're talking about, so maybe it's okay to make an exception?

Nah, hate to say it, but even Topher's oversensitive tear glands aren't worth denying pleasure to the rest of the forum members.

 

[cronxeh]

Yess.. nothing like a fat angry emo nerd chick stalking you.. planning to jump you in a dark alley

SWAN DIVE!

[PLAIN]http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:dNV4xFNaOW9nJM:http://my.wcsx.com/buck/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/fat-chick.jpg&t=1

Nerd down.

 

[jackmell]

...:( nobody's posting anymore...
I could start a monologue! but it would make me look even more sad...
everyone's probably got interesting things to do in their lives... well I dont! not right now! I'm not in the mood!

Sounds like you . . . well, may have some things? You're not tryin' to fix other peoples problems and not fixin' your own are you?

 

[brainstorm]

Is it better to stay lonely waiting for someone closer to your ideals or mess around with someone you know you would leave in a second for someone else?

 

[anubis01]

I like your advise and I agree with most of it, but it will land him in the friendzone. If she hasn't noticed him yet, he has to be noticed by her. She has to be pursuing him in her mind even if she doesn't show it. At high school level this is best done by either being a prep or a jock. Cultivating multiple female friendships and being 'seen' hanging out with them while the particular girl in question is in the viewing angle. She has to notice you, think about you and then initiate the contact.

By chasing her, you are likely to either end up in friendzone or simply waste so much time/energy/money trying to serenade an already horny teenager.

You know, I don't understand why people talk about the friend zone like its a black hole with no escape.

The two times I've had female friends that I eventually developed feelings for, they both returned those feelings. Now admittedly my less than stellar response to this, coupled with their timing in telling me (they both couldn't have picked worse times) things kinda feel apart.

But the point is, if its an actual two way friendship were the girl makes an effort to spend time with you, not to cry about her boyfriend but actually appreciate your company, over time it probably will lead to feelings developing. The real trick is just making sure you're both available when that happens.

 

[brainstorm]

The real trick is just making sure you're both available when that happens.

That never happens b/c they are instinctively drawn to want what is off limits. It is a safety mechanism designed to prevent instant gratification.

 

[anubis01]

That never happens b/c they are instinctively drawn to want what is off limits. It is a safety mechanism designed to prevent instant gratification.

maybe I should have worded it differently but it wasn't like that.

Girl 1 was dropping hints for a good month, but I didn't pursue it right away because I wasn't sure, that and she had an overseas boyfriend (he was in Pakistan while she had moved to Canada), so yeah after her asking me out for dinner and me giving her a birthday card saying "your a good friend"... well that didn't go well.

Girl 2 I initially asked out, she just wanted to be friends, four months later she develops feelings for me, always making an extra effort to spend time with me etc.. but she made that push when pretty much everything in my life was going to hell in a hand basket, so yeah that didn't work out either.

Perhaps some women do play games like that, but like I said the ones that are actually close to you usually don't do that stuff.

 

[Topher925]

Just another example of your insensitivity. It was only one poster that might have taken offense. You denied pleasure to every other forum member just to spare the feelings of one poster.

But this is Topher we're talking about, so maybe it's okay to make an exception?

Nah, hate to say it, but even Topher's oversensitive tear glands aren't worth denying pleasure to the rest of the forum members.

I can take it, bring it on! I'm always willing to sacrifice my feelings for good entertainment.

 

[nucleargirl]

So what are you trying to say? If she's fat, she's used to being rejected? What horribly insensitive advice!

But I do have to credit you with at least a little insight. You were perceptive enough to realize that no one with a centerfold type body would be interested in someone so nerdy that they'd ask such a lame question. Although, in its own way, that's kind of insensitive and insulting to just assume that the person asking is a nerd - or maybe it's just insensitive and insulting to come right out and say he's a nerd, since his nerdiness is a little too obvious to just ignore.

Where's Cyrus? He gives much more tender, sensitive answers than you.

um... I think you have comprehension problems. You totally misunderstood my post.

 

[cristo]

um... I think you have comprehension problems. You totally misunderstood my post.

I think Bob was joking. I'd advise you not to take things so seriously/literally. This entire subforum is a joke!

 

[nucleargirl]

Sounds like you . . . well, may have some things? You're not tryin' to fix other peoples problems and not fixin' your own are you?

Obviously I have my own problems, but I think sometimes you are not always the best at helping yourself - it is better to help each other - cos we are all good at different things and can offer advice in different areas. So just because someone doesn't have their life completely sorted, doesn't mean they have nothing to offer others - nobody's perfect yet we all have a lot to offer. Like Confucious said: There will be a teacher for me amongst any 3 travellers.

 

[nucleargirl]

I think Bob was joking. I'd advise you not to take things so seriously/literally. This entire subforum is a joke!

yes, and I'd advise you to do the same :)

 

[nucleargirl]

Just another example of your insensitivity. It was only one poster that might have taken offense. You denied pleasure to every other forum member just to spare the feelings of one poster.

But this is Topher we're talking about, so maybe it's okay to make an exception?

Nah, hate to say it, but even Topher's oversensitive tear glands aren't worth denying pleasure to the rest of the forum members.

and actually it would have been very entertaining had you been reading the post at the right time. better follow my posts more closely in future if you want to catch all the fun parts :p

 

[cristo]

At least some of the other threads in this subforum are actually seeking advice, but this thread is just noise. Time to close it down.