What has been your biggest FAILURE in Life? Admit it

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Discussion Overview

The thread discusses personal failures and regrets experienced by participants in various aspects of their lives, including education, relationships, and self-perception. The scope includes reflections on past decisions and the impact of these perceived failures on their current lives.

Discussion Character

  • Exploratory
  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification

Main Points Raised

  • Some participants express regret over not completing their education, citing family obligations or lack of effort as contributing factors.
  • Others reflect on missed opportunities in relationships, indicating feelings of regret over not pursuing certain connections.
  • A few participants discuss their struggles with self-criticism and the impact of their decisions on their self-esteem and future potential.
  • Some argue that viewing past actions as failures is overly self-deprecating, suggesting that failure is only present in the results and that there is always time to change outcomes.
  • Concerns about money management and its effects on personal and professional progress are raised by participants.
  • Several individuals mention issues with willpower and procrastination, expressing frustration over their inability to focus on studies or work.
  • There are reflections on personal growth and the lessons learned from past experiences, with some participants asserting that they do not view their past decisions as failures.
  • Some participants share feelings of being overly concerned with others' opinions, which has affected their life choices.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Participants generally share personal experiences of failure, but there is no consensus on whether these experiences should be viewed negatively. Some believe that failures can be reframed as learning opportunities, while others express a more critical view of their past decisions.

Contextual Notes

Participants express various assumptions about the nature of failure and success, with some relying on personal definitions that may not align with others. The discussion reflects a range of emotional responses and interpretations of past experiences.

Who May Find This Useful

Individuals reflecting on their own life choices, those interested in personal development, or anyone seeking to understand the diverse perspectives on failure and regret may find this discussion relevant.

  • #31
I found that because I am unhappy about my progress.
 
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  • #32
biggest in terms of measuring my progress against what was needed for success, i'd say it was not proving the hodge conjecture, or actually not even learning precisely what it says.

in other realms, as one of my friends' coffee mug says, most of my money i spent on whiskey and women - the rest of it i just wasted.
 
  • #33
In the end, I think that worrying about what you did wrong is pointless. Worrying about what you can do correctly now is what matters.

I like analogies a lot... Let's say that when you were younger, you put a big giant stone infront of your house so that you can't get in. Now you could stand in front of the door and cuss at yourself for being so stupid to put that huge stone infront of your door and accomplish nothing, or you could slowly work at moving it, or if you really wanted to enjoy your house, you could just break in the window.

As you can see, I am not very good with analogies, but I do think that it gets a point across... lol
 
  • #34
Guys and Gals

Life is not the amount of breaths you take it is the moments that take your breath away.

BY
RN

Thank You, Remember this and you will never feel unhappiness.
 
  • #35
My greatest failure is losing the woman I loved through awful neuroses. That and being lazy. :cry:
 
  • #36
But then why are you unhappy if you know how to avoid unhapiness decoz?
 
  • #37
Its unfortunate that the unhappiest events tend to be the ones we remember most clearly. Must be part of the defence mechanism so we never repeat them.
 
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  • #38
Because I don't have a lot of time left. I know life is short whatever time you get is luck.

One thing to keep in mind:

Have no attachment in life you not willing to walk out 30 sec flat if you spot the heat around the corner.

BY

RN
 
  • #39
Working too hard. I missed quite a few special events around school due to either my job or schoolwork which I regret to some extent. Cutting down on my classes this last semester of school in order to stop and smell the roses :)
 
  • #40
Fail in 4 physics exam questions, that leave me to the 20 place in the physics olympic.
 
  • #41
Hi, I wish I had been told early on about a wonderful book called...
"How to Win Friends and Influence people". I should have saved myself some grief, and perhaps won more of what I wanted , and had less antagonizing
situations better recognized with the help of this wondrous volume of sage contemplation and sound counsel. It will be the finest $8.00 you shall ever spend on a book, and prove worthy each day, and mark you as someone desreving in your enterprises. Dale Carnegie should well be remembered as the Father of Business and cooperation. When I teach a novice, One of the first things I do is mention this title. Many is the time that they come back to me and thank me whole heartedly for this inspiration. It can change your life for the better. Would that it was on the Freshman reading list, now and always.
This book, alone, can counter the "IN your face attitude" so prevalent today,
and help turn things around for those who will read with understanding, and hold dear the "Logic which never Fails".
Best regards All,
Daniel
 
  • #42
The problem in our lives is that we spend to much time wanting things and then become unhappy because we want more things and then we are never satisfied. If take old teachings from buddha we can learn that in eliminating wants or atleast minimiseing them, we will feel more happiness and less suffering.
I have no regrets in my life so far, there have been things that at the time I wish regretted but in retrospect it was better the way it happened. I try and live each day, not just walk through it.
 
  • #43
Boy are there a lot of people here who have some living to do. I have seen few here "failures" that matter in the long run. Getting a B on test :smile:

The failure of my first marriage has haunted me. Thou I am very happy to be separated from the ex, the separation from my sons is a wound that will not heal. I have maintained a close relationship with both, but...

Both played instruments (trumpet and trombone) in HS, I never heard them play. Both have grown up and married and I have listened to their lives in weekly, now sometimes monthly, phone calls. I have 2 grandsons, with a 3rd on the way who are growing up and I am missing their lives as well.

The problem is the continent which separates us and a 2nd marriage which has changed priorities.

(Ivan, please do not mention this post to, or in the presence of, Derivative)
 
  • #44
I can give one suggestion:

Forget what happened, Now on live life as if it was your last second in this world and make the best effort to do what you do.

Once again I repeat, if you want to be happy in life , have no attachment in life you not willing to walk out 30 sec falt if you spot the heat around the corner.

Remember that and you will never feel any emotion, no unhappiness.

Thanks
RN
 
  • #45
Come on Guys and Gals
 
  • #46
decoz said:
Remember that and you will never feel any emotion, no unhappiness.

But then you will never feel any happiness either?
 
  • #47
decoz said:
I can give one suggestion:

Forget what happened, Now on live life as if it was your last second in this world and make the best effort to do what you do.

If one lived like that, he'd probably burn out in no time. :biggrin:
 
  • #48
Feeling is all part of life, it makes us human
 
  • #49
I don't think so. I was like that human. I used to feel like a stranger in a no name town.

But now I am tough, I don't give a **** about nobody.

I just don't care,

Thanks
RN
 
  • #50
decoz said:
I don't think so. I was like that human. I used to feel like a stranger in a no name town.

But now I am tough, I don't give a **** about nobody.

I just don't care,

Thanks
RN

Well, if you're telling the truth, you have been gifted a virtue. :biggrin:
 
  • #51
How can you just not care? I care about everything and I love it. I do everything I do with passion, energy and enthusiasium really living life and trying to help others feel good. Generally the things I do like sport I will never do the best it and don't train as hard as I should but I do well at it, making rep. teams when I never should've, because do it with all my heart. I care about what everyone feels, thinks, wants to do I couldn't live without caring I would be an absolute mess
 
  • #52
well guess what dude, I think you are an absolute mess. I don't mean no disrespect to you or anyboody, But that's how I think.
 
  • #53
What makes you think I am a mess?!
 
  • #54
Forget it bro. Have a good life . Good luck
 
  • #55
decoz said:
I don't think so. I was like that human. I used to feel like a stranger in a no name town.

But now I am tough, I don't give a **** about nobody.

I just don't care,

Thanks
RN

How can you enjoy life though, if you have no emotions? Surely that just makes everyday dull and monotonous, with nothing to wake up to enjoy?
 
  • #56
Does PF have a suicide patrol?
 
  • #57
decoz said:
Once again I repeat, if you want to be happy in life , have no attachment in life you not willing to walk out 30 sec falt if you spot the heat around the corner.

Remember that and you will never feel any emotion, no unhappiness.

this is rather unfortunate, but it is unfortunatelly true... people hurt... situations hurt... you get emotions involved and there you find yourself all by yourself crushed into pieces drinking alone at night... affects your school work, etc. ... then once you are over it you make a deal with yourself to never end up like that again... well i just had one bad experience but is 'memorable' enough...

failures?...hmmmm i don't want to think of my past in those terms... I typically put all I have in terms of effort into school and then hope for the best. Oh, also someone taught me to make informed decisions and NEVER look back no matter what the outcome... not going to help
 
  • #58
as the great satchel paige once said:, "don't look back, something might be gaining on you."
 
  • #59
Not getting to know a friend better before he took his life.
 
  • #60
Well I think decoz is just being honest and we should all respect that. It does seem that Ruthwaite thinks people who don't love everybody are in a mess, which is a very odd thing to say. If that's true, she can only be said to be loving everyone because she doesn't want to be in a mess herself. That is a negative way to live, living so that you aren't something or other.

Whereas we should try to live so that we are something. We shouldn't run away, we should run towards. I think the way to become happy is to stop running and escaping and ignoring and rather to look at things honestly and find a positive reason to live. And when you find that reason, you will likely be more happy than you have ever been.

This approach is also very beneficial because if you are living negatively, people can control you because they can imply or suggest that you are something you wish not to be. Many people are gullible in this way, like when a boyfriend says "if you love me, you will sleep with me".

If you define yourself in comparison to others, they will control you. This is a simple truth. If you find a reason to live for yourself, you become your own master.
 

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