What Kind of Humor Can You Find in a My Favorite Jokes Thread?

[Lisa!]

your post. duh![/color]

You should write the names with capital letter.It's important espe. about John.john means a toilet!

About the second part of my post, It was nothing.As I remember you said my name is Jim!


Got it now or I still should explain more? (I hope this post wouldn't need to be clarified! )

 

[JamesU]

I never said you name was jim. I said MY name was jim.

 

[Lisa!]

I never said you name was jim. I said MY name was jim.

Nice joke!

 

[JamesU]

you're crazy

 

[Lisa!]

And you're always confused!

 

[JamesU]

that's because you're always confusing!

 

[stunner5000pt]

Yes I know it's a long joke. But if you have the time tocome to the thread and read jokes rather do your homework, then whats's another 2 minutes to you?

three men were at the gates of heaven. St Peter says that in order to get into heaven they need to tell him their individual stories and if it's unfortuante enough, then they can go to heaven

First guy's story - I suspected my wife of cheating. So i came home early from work one day and found my wife in bed naked. SO i looked everywhered around my apartment and didnt find anything. Finally on the balcony, i saw someone's fingers hanging off the balcony. I took a hammer and hit his fingers and he eventually lost grip and fell down. But he landed on a tree, so he survived. SO i took teh refrigerator and threw it on him and it instantly killed him. After that, all this trauma was too much for me, and i had a heart attack and died.
St Peter said - preetty unfortunate story - go on into heaven.

Second Guy's Story - I was doing my exercises on my balcony one day and i accidentally fell off. I luckily managed to grab onto the balcony below mine, but then this madman comes and hits my fingers with a hammer. He broke my fingers so i fell down. Luckily i landed on a tree. But next thing i see is a refrigerator coming at me, and so here i am.
St Peter - pretty sad story - go on into heaven

Third Guy - Picture this - I'm the guy in the refrigerator.

 

[Lisa!]

The stupidest joke I've ever heard: (actually it's not a joke)

2 guys walk into a bar. Then 1 guy says to the other, "is this some kind of joke?"

 

[EnumaElish]

A Brit and a Dane are smoking outside when it starts to rain. The Brit reaches into his pocket and pulls out a condom. He explains: "I'll put the fag into this so I can keep smoking." The Dane says "good idea," runs into a nearby pharmacy and requests a condom. The pharmacist asks: what size? The Dane: "it doesn't matter as long as it'll fit a camel."

 

[Lisa!]

Some Improvements in Hell

An engineer died and ended up in Hell. Soon, he became dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell, and began designing and building improvements. After a while, they had flush toilets, air conditioning, escalators. The engineer was a pretty popular guy.

One day God called to Satan and said with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?"

Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."God exclaimed, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake--he should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up here."

"No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!"

Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

 

[tribdog]

Artman, franz and Danger are in a car wreck and all three die. They go to hell and Satan come up to them. He grabs Danger and hands him the most hideous looking woman you've ever seen. she has buck teeth and really bad acne. Satan says, "for all your sins in life you must spend eternity with this woman."
Next he grabs franz and hands him an extremely fat woman covered in boils. "For all your sins in life you must spend eternity with this woman"
finally he grabs artman. He hands him a beautiful blonde. satan turns to the blonde, "for all your sins in life..."

 

[Lisa!]

Artman, franz and Danger are in a car wreck and all three die. They go to hell and Satan come up to them. He grabs Danger and hands him the most hideous looking woman you've ever seen. she has buck teeth and really bad acne. Satan says, "for all your sins in life you must spend eternity with this woman."
Next he grabs franz and hands him an extremely fat woman covered in boils. "For all your sins in life you must spend eternity with this woman"
finally he grabs artman. He hands him a beautiful blonde. satan turns to the blonde, "for all your sins in life..."

Oh man you're really brave or perhaps...
I heard this joke along time before and wanted to make a joke about PFers base on it, but I didn't dare!