What Are the Evolutionary Origins of Human Love and Desire?

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SUMMARY

This discussion explores the evolutionary origins of human love and desire, emphasizing that love is a conscious choice rather than a mere biochemical reaction. Participants argue that true love prioritizes the needs of others above one's own, contrasting it with transient emotional states often mischaracterized as love. The conversation also touches on the complexities of romantic love, attachment, and the societal implications of love as defined in wedding vows. Key references include the biblical description of love in 1 Corinthians 13 and the role of chemicals like dopamine and serotonin in emotional experiences.

PREREQUISITES
  • Understanding of evolutionary psychology concepts related to attachment and bonding.
  • Familiarity with the biochemical basis of emotions, including dopamine and serotonin.
  • Knowledge of philosophical and theological perspectives on love, particularly in relation to marriage vows.
  • Awareness of cultural interpretations of love across different societies.
NEXT STEPS
  • Research the role of dopamine and serotonin in emotional bonding and attachment.
  • Explore evolutionary psychology theories on the development of romantic love.
  • Study the philosophical implications of love as a choice versus a feeling.
  • Examine cultural variations in the understanding and expression of love.
USEFUL FOR

This discussion is beneficial for psychologists, relationship counselors, sociologists, and anyone interested in the complexities of human emotions and relationships.

N_Quire
I have often said "I love you", to children, people I desire, my parents, even aunts and uncles and one or two friends. But what is love? Does it mean I like you a lot and/or I want you a lot? Will someone tell me what love is; I don't mind the explanation being evolutionary and scientific.
 
Biology news on Phys.org
A biblical description of love is in 1 Corinthians 13.
 
I've read articles that breakdown love into chemicals and even what chemicals are responsible for the differemt stages of love. However, don't tell your bf/gf that the reason you love them is because of some chemicals in your body. :wink:
 
maybe it's the other way around, love induces those chemicals...
 
This is going to sound terribly unromantic, so let me preface it by saying that I am a terribly romantic guy (or is it a romantically terrible guy?). I understand about the chemicals, the dopamine and the serotonin, and the endorphins and all that. I understand the emotional excitement or sentimentality most commonly associated with a "love" relationship. And, I am heavily in favor of all that stuff. But I feel that I must state, most emphatically, that is not love.

Love is a choice. It carries with it a certain connotation of priority. For example, a thing that is loved will be given preferential treatment over an unloved thing. If you love a person, you will give that person's wants and needs a higher priority than your own.

This, I believe, marks the difference between the romance which modern Western culture often refers to as "love", and true love of the sort referred to in the wedding vows. In today's society, one will often hear the claim "I love him, I can't help it!", or "there's nothing I can do; I have simply stopped loving her." In my opinion, these are examples of misusing the word "love" in reference to a feeling (over which we have no control). This cannot be the sort of love found in the wedding vows, in which billions of couples throughout millennia have promised to love, honor, etc. If love were a set of biochemical impulses, or transient emotional states, over which we have no control, we obviously could not promise it.
 
yea but i think it would still be cool to say, "OH baby the first time i detected your feramones i have had the unstopable natural urge to reproduce our race"
 
The Grimmus, I tried that line. I got slapped.
 
Originally posted by N_Quire
what is love?

Baby don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
No more.

eNtRopY
 
..got to do, got to do with it?

It's an ill-defined term, people use it to mean so many different thinks. Romantic love... hmmm... it's sort of a primitive. Like pornography, you can't define it but you just know it when you see it. :smile:
 
  • #10
Love is...two naked eight year olds who are married. After making such a statement, I truly hope everyone recognises the reference.
 
  • #11
For those whos light bulb remains dim:

http://www.comicspage.com/loveis/
 
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  • #12
Perhaps Love has a lot to do with instinct.

Our instincts protect us from harm and alert us to circumstances that we haven't perceived.

Perhaps our instincts alert us to a compatability to another person and tries to bribe our conscious self into bonding with that match by releasing those chemicals?
 
  • #13
no wait love is that thing you do to the funny dressed lady on the corner afetr seh steals your walet and asks you funny questions
 
  • #14
Love is an attachment to something that makes one feel pleased. I'm pretty sure it is due to a mixture of horomonal reactions in the brain. Nothing else. It is an advanced state of attachment. For example, take a married couple. They have unconditional, eternal affection for one another. Animals, which are inferior to humans do not posess such a sensation. Only two species do, humans and (something, I can't remember what it was called). Overall, love is a strong sense of attachment.
 
  • #15
"I do understand what love is, and that is one of the reasons I can never again be a Christian. Love is not self denial. Love is not blood and suffering. Love is not murdering your son to appease your own vanity. Love is not hatred or wrath, consigning billions of people to eternal torture because they have offended your ego or disobeyed your rules. Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being."
-Dan Barker
 
  • #16
Hear hear
 
  • #17
Amen to that!
 
  • #18
Love consists in this,
that two solitudes protect
and touch
and greet each other.
 
  • #19
Originally posted by LURCH


Love is a choice. It carries with it a certain connotation of priority. For example, a thing that is loved will be given preferential treatment over an unloved thing. If you love a person, you will give that person's wants and needs a higher priority than your own.

I have to agree. I can see with that definition that it can be used universally with family, friends and others. I don't really think that it always has to be romantic and between man and woman.
 
  • #20
Romance has nothing to do with love.Romance is merely a specific kind, so to speak.
What kind of definition are you guys looking for?? A moral one?
 
  • #21
luv

When a dog I had for 13 yrs died I cried for days. I musta loved that unique dog. Although I don't know if I would've gave my life for the dogs life so maybe its not love. Do you have to be willing to give your life for it to be true love?

Some old couples that have been married for like 60 yrs and still like each other seem to be the ultimate in what I think love can be?

Its like their infatuation more or less held up a lifetime.

I used to love milkshakes & giant hamburgers but now I'm cured.

Ya know someday chemicals (drugs) will be sold to aid love.


gilnv of www.surrealcity.com
 
  • #22
Love begins where the urge to kill ends.
 
  • #23
this is the most common dialogue about love in Hindi movies..."love begins with hatredness'...
 
  • #24
Originally posted by BoulderHead
"I do understand what love is, and that is one of the reasons I can never again be a Christian. Love is not self denial. Love is not blood and suffering. Love is not murdering your son to appease your own vanity. Love is not hatred or wrath, consigning billions of people to eternal torture because they have offended your ego or disobeyed your rules. Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission.
-Dan Barker

Love is disciplining those who have done wrong to the extent they deserve. Love is sending your perfect, only child to endure all the evil that has ever existed to give the choice eternal life to all the imperfect humans on the earth. This is the reason why I can not be athiest. There would be no one to love or thank for all the blessings poured upon me and the world.
 
  • #25
Love is teaching your children about reality, not lies and fairy tales.
 
  • #26
Love is teaching your children about reality, not lies and fairy tales.

Indeed. Yet the bible doesn't contain lies or fairy tales.
 
  • #27
Originally posted by Psyber freek
Love is disciplining those who have done wrong to the extent they deserve.
No one deserves an eternity in Hell.
There would be no one to love or thank for all the blessings poured upon me and the world.
I would thank the individuals who enriched my life.
 
  • #28
Originally posted by Psyber freek
Indeed. Yet the bible doesn't contain lies or fairy tales.


no, it IS lies and fairy tales...someone lied to you!

LOL, never mind, let's not fight.
 
  • #29
Originally posted by LURCH
Love is a choice. It carries with it a certain connotation of priority. For example, a thing that is loved will be given preferential treatment over an unloved thing. If you love a person, you will give that person's wants and needs a higher priority than your own.

This, I believe, marks the difference between the romance which modern Western culture often refers to as "love", and true love of the sort referred to in the wedding vows. In today's society, one will often hear the claim "I love him, I can't help it!", or "there's nothing I can do; I have simply stopped loving her." In my opinion, these are examples of misusing the word "love" in reference to a feeling (over which we have no control). This cannot be the sort of love found in the wedding vows, in which billions of couples throughout millennia have promised to love, honor, etc. If love were a set of biochemical impulses, or transient emotional states, over which we have no control, we obviously could not promise it.
I do agree Lurch. I think you reaise an incredibly valid point, but I don't know whether what u are talking about is actually 'Love' or not. If it is, then what is that feeling? I mean, we have commitment, and then we have a reason for commiting don't we?

Making that choice to prioritise someone over everything else has to happen for a reason doesn't it? And usually, most people would agree, it is made because of that 'I love him, I can't help it!' feeling...

Perhaps, you are not talking about love, but are actually talking about the 'phenotypic' expression of true love. Unquestioning Dedication...?
 
  • #30
Ya know someday chemicals (drugs) will be sold to aid love.
Viagra & MDMA :wink:


No one deserves an eternity in Hell.
I don't believe Hell is menioned in the Bible in that context. Hellfire and damnation was made up by those in power (the Church) to persude the masses to join their 'club'

Please read http://www.yeshuatyisrael.com/sheol.htm

I've studied religion in many forms and have my own ideas but I don't profess that I'm right. What I do know is what many people believe is right are propbably wrong :smile:

no, it IS lies and fairy tales...someone lied to you!
Be careful...all myths have an origin it's just that they tend to get more and more distorted over time. Still, it would be an interesting debate sometime
 
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