- #1
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- 38
So I decided to spend a little of my stimulus check to help local merchants. I went down to our local soap vendor. They have beautiful handmade soaps that they create right there in the shop and they smell so nice.
I'm browsing around, and this guy comes in the store looking and sounding like he'd been up for about 3 days straight. Long hair, too tan, rumpled suit, flip flops. He was really loud and making a huge fuss over everything and asking the salesgirl to tell him about this and that. OH, THIS IS SO AMAZING. THIS IS SO MARVELOUS. I HAVE TO TELL ALL MY FRIENDS!
These people at the soap shop are new age types, so she's showing the guy the soaps and telling him to properly select a soap, he had to place a hand over his stomach and sniff a soap, then see if it "resonated" in the chest/heart area, the nasal passages or in.. get this.. "the frontal lobes". (almost lost it right there).
Now I am just minding my business, sniffing the soaps old-school style. You know, just sniffing them. And the weirdo starts in on me saying' "hey, you're doing it wrong - you have to put your hand on your stomach. Go on, put your hand on your stomach." So, I laugh, a little embarrassed. Then the salesgirl starts in, too, insisting I do this airy-fairy sniffing ritual, and finally I'm like, "no thanks, I don't believe in that stuff. I'm a science major."
OHHHMG! It was like SHUN, SHuuuUUuuN, SHUN the non-believer! They ganged up on me.
The salesgirl said, "Well, that's too bad because your body is a beautiful vessel..blather blather..and your chakras.. blather blather..." And the guy is harping on me, and I grab my soap and go to the counter to pay for my soap. (I really wanted the soap.) And the guy is going on as loudly as he can about how the soap essences have been scientifically proven to align the chakras, make the cells healthier, etc. It just kept getting more and more absurd as he went on. The salesgirl is agreeing with him and eating it up with a spoon.
The girl behind the counter seemed to feel truly bad for me. She rang me up quickly and politely while the other two yammered on.
How do you guys deal with New Agers? Normally I would just ignore them, but when they want me to do something stupid, it's a bit too much.
(The soap's really good, though.)
I'm browsing around, and this guy comes in the store looking and sounding like he'd been up for about 3 days straight. Long hair, too tan, rumpled suit, flip flops. He was really loud and making a huge fuss over everything and asking the salesgirl to tell him about this and that. OH, THIS IS SO AMAZING. THIS IS SO MARVELOUS. I HAVE TO TELL ALL MY FRIENDS!
These people at the soap shop are new age types, so she's showing the guy the soaps and telling him to properly select a soap, he had to place a hand over his stomach and sniff a soap, then see if it "resonated" in the chest/heart area, the nasal passages or in.. get this.. "the frontal lobes". (almost lost it right there).
Now I am just minding my business, sniffing the soaps old-school style. You know, just sniffing them. And the weirdo starts in on me saying' "hey, you're doing it wrong - you have to put your hand on your stomach. Go on, put your hand on your stomach." So, I laugh, a little embarrassed. Then the salesgirl starts in, too, insisting I do this airy-fairy sniffing ritual, and finally I'm like, "no thanks, I don't believe in that stuff. I'm a science major."
OHHHMG! It was like SHUN, SHuuuUUuuN, SHUN the non-believer! They ganged up on me.
The salesgirl said, "Well, that's too bad because your body is a beautiful vessel..blather blather..and your chakras.. blather blather..." And the guy is harping on me, and I grab my soap and go to the counter to pay for my soap. (I really wanted the soap.) And the guy is going on as loudly as he can about how the soap essences have been scientifically proven to align the chakras, make the cells healthier, etc. It just kept getting more and more absurd as he went on. The salesgirl is agreeing with him and eating it up with a spoon.
The girl behind the counter seemed to feel truly bad for me. She rang me up quickly and politely while the other two yammered on.
How do you guys deal with New Agers? Normally I would just ignore them, but when they want me to do something stupid, it's a bit too much.
(The soap's really good, though.)