Bad Math Jokes

[berkeman]

 

[DaveC426913]

Two mathematicians are eating lunch on a bench in a park. Across from them is a men's washroom.

Over several minutes as they eat, two men enter the washoom and three men leave.

One mathematician nudges his buddy and says: "Now, if one more man enters, there will be zero men in there again."

 

[jack action]

 

[pines-demon]

View attachment 360035​

Based on a recent post of mine: "What kind of integration is Berezin integration?"

$$\int \sin(\mathrm d \theta)$$

Mathematicians: "how are you supposed to integrate this expression doesn't make any sense!"

Theoretical physicists:
$$\int \sin(\mathrm d \theta)=\int \mathrm d \theta = 0$$
"Nice."

 

[DaveC426913]

I'm running errands for a friend's party in Owen Sound.

I'm at 16th Ave and 16th St, where they cross.

Do I tell her I'm at 1/8th Or 1/256th?

 

[collinsmark]

I'm running errands for a friend's party in Owen Sound.

I'm at 16th Ave and 16th St, where they cross.

Do I tell her I'm at 1/8th Or 1/256th?

The cross product of perpendicular streets is their simple product, assuming the streets are truly perpendicular. But the cross product is also a vector that is perpendicular to both streets. So I guess that would make it 256th in the up/down direction. Like an elevator. 256th floor or somesuch.

 

[berkeman]

 

[jack action]

 

[DaveC426913]

This isn't bad; this is danged clever.

 

[DaveC426913]

 

[pines-demon]

View attachment 363481

You ran a code for this?

 

[Borg]

You ran a code for this?

4! and 5! were both correct.

 

[martinbn]

4! and 5! were both correct.

But the sentences are missing a period at the end. Or may be an exclamation mark!

 

[DaveC426913]

You ran a code for this?

 

[DaveC426913]

But the sentences are missing a period at the end. Or may be an exclamation mark!

This is the math thread, not the english punctuation thread.

 

[pines-demon]

But the sentences are missing a period at the end. Or may be an exclamation mark!

I was wondering if we could find more examples of $n-m/k = p!$ for $n,m,k,p\in\mathbb{N}$.

 

[Ibix]

I was wondering if we could find more examples of $n-m/k = p!$ for $n,m,k,p\in\mathbb{N}$.

They also need to satisfy $(n-m)/k=p$ for the gag to work.

 

[pines-demon]

They also need to satisfy $(n-m)/k=p$ for the gag to work.

Are you telling me that it can be read in two ways?! (sarcasm)

 

[Ibix]

Are you telling me that it can be read in two ways?! (sarcasm)

Momentary humour detector failure, sorry.

I think "I was wondering if we could find more examples of $n,m,k,p\in\mathbb{N}$ that satisfy $n-m/k = p!$" would work better, though. <Waits for DaveC to remind that it's not the punctuation thread.>

 

[pines-demon]

I wrote some simple code:

import math


def find_joke_solutions(max_d, max_val):
    solutions = []
    for d in range(3, max_d + 1):
      fact=math.factorial(d)
      for c in range(2, fact//d):  # ensure c != 1
          for bi in range(1,max_val//c+1):
            b=bi*c
            # first equation: a = c*d + b
            a = c * d + b
                # second equation: a - (b/c) == fact
            if a - (b / c) == fact:
              solutions.append((a, b, c, d))
    return solutions

I got
$$a-b/c=d!$$
with $(a,b,c,d!)$:

• 25,5,5,4! (original case)
• 230, 220, 2, 5! (second case posted above)
• 721, 103, 103, 6!
• 5752, 5696, 8, 7!
• 45351, 45279, 9, 8!
• 362894, 220892, 15778, 9!
• 3629032, 3479072, 14996, 10!

I skipped those that had the same factorial result. You can prove that there is no solution for $d<4$ and $c>1$. Also it is interesting that for it to work $a,b$ have to be of the order of $d!$.

 

[berkeman]

 

[berkeman]

 

[BillTre]

Shouldn't it be veloci (raptors cancel)?

 

[Ibix]

Shouldn't it be veloci (raptors cancel)?

There was another raptor hiding in the bushes, just like in the film.

 

[jack action]

6 was scared of 7 because 7, 8, 9. But why did 7 ate 9?

Spoiler: Answer

Because you are supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day.

 

[jack action]

 

[WWGD]

I met a girl named Shirly, which is almost surely Shirley.

 

[256bits]

I met a girl named Shirly, which is almost surely Shirley.

Shirley, that must be from the move Airplane.

 

[WWGD]

Shirley, that must be from the move Airplane.

Almost surely too.

 

[WWGD]

A few years back, I taught Calc 2 to a group of jocks, athletes. I changed my variables from x,y, to u and e, so my integrals would read $\int f(u, e)$DuDe.