Can a Beautiful Girl Love a Lame Legged Man?

[Moonbear]

I'm going to be blunt, because I think it's needed here. Your leg will not be a problem for meeting women, and a limp is no big deal. Your insecurities about your own appearance will be a problem. Insecurity isn't attractive to mature women who are not bothered by a limp. Likewise, sitting at home and not socializing will reduce your chances to zero. Deal with why YOU are not comfortable with your appearance, and get out and be social. You may need to seek help from a professional psychologist if you can't get over your insecurities on your own.

 

[DaveC426913]

I'm going to be blunt, because I think it's needed here. Your leg will not be a problem for meeting women, and a limp is no big deal. Your insecurities about your own appearance will be a problem. Insecurity isn't attractive to mature women who are not bothered by a limp. Likewise, sitting at home and not socializing will reduce your chances to zero. Deal with why YOU are not comfortable with your appearance, and get out and be social. You may need to seek help from a professional psychologist if you can't get over your insecurities on your own.

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[sameev29]

What if I love someone and she likes me as a friend but doesn't understand my real feelings for her.How can I let her know about this?When she finds out what if she gets angry and starts hating me.

 

[DaveC426913]

What if I love someone and she likes me as a friend but doesn't understand my real feelings for her.How can I let her know about this?When she finds out what if she gets angry and starts hating me.

Why would she get angry? Why would she hate you? Do you plan to be mean to her?

 

[Moonbear]

What if I love someone and she likes me as a friend but doesn't understand my real feelings for her.How can I let her know about this?When she finds out what if she gets angry and starts hating me.

And what if she feels the same way about you, but you're both too afraid to ever say anything about it? I don't agree it's right or fair, but it is still quite common for women to wait for a man to make the first move. If she is your friend, she won't be angry. At worst, it will be a little awkward a few days if she doesn't feel as strongly about you and tells you so, but some of the best relationships grow from friendships.

Seriously, these are your own inner insecurities speaking. I really think you should seek professional help to understand why you feel this way and to help you gain confidence. Were you teased a lot as a kid, perhaps? Things like that can be hard to get over and to accept that adults are not children. A psychologist can help you sort through those issues. It's way more than we can help you with over the internet.

 

[sameev29]

Why would she get angry? Why would she hate you? Do you plan to be mean to her?

The fact is she is a lot childish in many manners.She works as a part time reporter in a child based news program of a tv channel.She has met and known many many people.She also has another very very good friend who is also handicapped.His condition is serious than mine.He requires a stick to walk,can't walk fast or run.He is very nice,I am also friends with him.But she speaks with him many times a day on the phone.She tells all of her problems to him for help.She also talks with me everyday on the phone but lees than with him.I don't know maybe she really loves him.I am scared as she has more good male friends.

I don't know what to do .But she is the most affectionate and understanding female person I have ever met.Moreover I don't know if my mother will want her as my future wife.I can't go against my mom.In appearance she is shorter than me but as white as me,she isn't good in studies ,my family is much richer than her's(I am not making fun of her,just saying).We are just about to finish high school in a few months.

I never had any regular contact with any girl before.This has made my other friends,teachers much more suspective.They are warning her about having contact with me as the final high school graduation exam is very close.Last night she was telling me about the warning she got.I became angry about it.Then I behaved rough with her,telling her that normal healthy people are bad,she is also one of them.I feel bad about it now.

I don't know where this is going.I am scared very much at this moment.I feel pain in my chest when I think about these.Don't know what to do.

 

[feathermoon]

Oh, you're in high school still? I wouldn't worry about anything, then. Try to remain calm. Be a little more light-hearted. You've got all the time in the world.

 

[DaveC426913]

But she is the most affectionate and understanding female person I have ever met.Moreover I don't know if my mother will want her as my future wife.

Agree with feathermoon. High school is a little early to have feelings this strong. And too early to be looking at future wife candidates.

Where I come from we would suggest you "play the field" a little bit.

 

[sameev29]

It's said that boys must have flat tummy before and after relationship and even after marriage to keep his soulmate attracted.Is it necessary for handicapped boys and men too?

My tummy was flat.But recently my waist has become more angled in a forward position.As a result my tummy has come out forward,which looks fat but it's not.When I make my waist straight it becomes like flat again.But it's so painful to keep my waist straight I can't do it.

Well it can't be understood while I am wearing clothes but if girls know about this they will hate me more and those who might like me would just leave me.What should I do about it?

 

[DaveC426913]

...they will hate me more and those who might like me would just leave me.What should I do about it?

You should seek counselling to deal with your esteem issues.

Girls are not turned off by bellies. They are turned off by men with low self-esteem.

 

[Evo]

You should seek counselling to deal with your esteem issues.

Girls are not turned off by bellies. They are turned off by men with low self-esteem.

Agreed.

 

[sameev29]

You should seek counselling to deal with your esteem issues.

Girls are not turned off by bellies. They are turned off by men with low self-esteem.

Are you telling the truth.I read in a 'wiki how' article about 'sustaining a relationship' that boys should have flat tummy to keep last the attraction forever.I have self esteem maybe not that much you are talking about but I have.

And it's happening because of my waist is getting angled will they understand that?

 

[DaveC426913]

Are you telling the truth.I read in a 'wiki how' article about 'sustaining a relationship' that boys should have flat tummy to keep last the attraction forever.I have self esteem maybe not that much you are talking about but I have.

And it's happening because of my waist is getting angled will they understand that?

Seriously. Self esteem is a muuuch bigger issue. (As is getting your relationship advice from a Wiki. Now, a science forum - that's OK! )

But seriously, you are barking up the wrong tree. Talk to someone.

 

[sameev29]

Seriously. Self esteem is a muuuch bigger issue. (As is getting your relationship advice from a Wiki. Now, a science forum - that's OK! )

But seriously, you are barking up the wrong tree. Talk to someone.

You sure that my problem is okay or are you just saying it to make me feel better?

 

[DaveC426913]

You sure that my problem is okay or are you just saying it to make me feel better?

No, I'm saying your belly is the least of your problems. You need to deal with your low self-esteem. You are worried about the wrong thing.

Given a choice between a handicapped man with a small belly, and a man who thinks that people will hate him because he has a belly, the ladies are going to choose the one who has a healthy sense of self and confidence.

You reveal yourself as someone who is overly-concerned with physical looks. You will dump her the moment she gains a small belly. What woman wants that?

 

[sameev29]

No, I'm saying your belly is the least of your problems. You need to deal with your low self-esteem. You are worried about the wrong thing.

Given a choice between a handicapped man with a small belly, and a man who thinks that people will hate him because he has a belly, the ladies are going to choose the one who has a healthy sense of self and confidence.

You reveal yourself as someone who is overly-concerned with physical looks. You will dump her the moment she gains a small belly. What woman wants that?

''You will dump her the moment she gains a small belly.'' what do you mean by that?By the way my tummy isn't fat really it looks fat because of my waist getting angled forward.

 

[feathermoon]

Truly the source of all low self confidence issues are what you tell yourself in your own head with your inner voice. If you ever have a thought 'I'm not good/skinny/funny enough' or 'I'm ugly/shy/doing things wrong', then you're sabotaging yourself. Most people don't have these thoughts except on the odd occasion. A few people have them often.

All you need to do is replace every negative thought you have about yourself with a positive. Literally, every time you catch yourself rationalizing an event with negative self-talk, stop yourself and think of a positive thing about yourself. Positive self-talk all the time. Never let yourself have a negative thought about yourself again. Some times you might wonder if you're lying to yourself, don't. No one is any better or worse than anyone else unless they tell themselves they are.

Do not worry a bit about anything that happens in high school. Its a tiny part of your life. Just always remember: positive self-talk. No matter what. No negatives. It benefits your personality more than you'd think.

 

[sameev29]

Truly the source of all low self confidence issues are what you tell yourself in your own head with your inner voice. If you ever have a thought 'I'm not good/skinny/funny enough' or 'I'm ugly/shy/doing things wrong', then you're sabotaging yourself. Most people don't have these thoughts except on the odd occasion. A few people have them often.

All you need to do is replace every negative thought you have about yourself with a positive. Literally, every time you catch yourself rationalizing an event with negative self-talk, stop yourself and think of a positive thing about yourself. Positive self-talk all the time. Never let yourself have a negative thought about yourself again. Some times you might wonder if you're lying to yourself, don't. No one is any better or worse than anyone else unless they tell themselves they are.

Do not worry a bit about anything that happens in high school. Its a tiny part of your life. Just always remember: positive self-talk. No matter what. No negatives. It benefits your personality more than you'd think.

Thanks feathermoon.I will be going to college in a few months.Actually I have been lonely most of my life.Had some friends a few years back but they turned against me at one point and said bad words to me.I feel much much lonely now and want someone to love me forever for what I am,the way I am.Don't know if I can find a girl like that but hope God does something for me.

I can't trust people now,I always fear if they turn against me or use me.By the way do you think my fat tummy which is happening because of the angled waist a big problem?

 

[sameev29]

What should I do with my tummy?Should I start exercising to loose it or just leave it?I am starting to hate myself,no girl will love me forever.

 

[Evo]

As has been said, you should seek professional help for your issues.