Dealing with Personal Boundaries at Work: Navigating Interference and Privacy

[Lisa!]

How on Earth some of people are always interfering in everything!(am I interfering here? )
So I don't know what's strange about me that my coworkers always talk about me more than anyone else and have lots of questions about me. They talk about my way of speaking, appearance , what I eat, how I work, what I wear, that's pretty annoying! I just feel that I'm always monitored. OMG! Today 1 of them asked me to bring 1 of my childhood's photo to see how I looked like as a kid!
I know somehow that's because I'm new there but hey I'm not the only new 1 and I've noticed that they almost never ask her questions! Ah the problem is that wherever I go the situation is like that and it seems to me that they never lose their interest to know more ad moreabout me!
Am I a weirdo?

 

[Mattara]

Just tell them to "Get out of my face or I will in secret add something really funny to the company's website that will steal all of your session passwords."

That usually works.

 

[Pengwuino]

Punch them in the gut and say you love them.

Oh wait, that's my method of being able to tell girls you love them. My bad.

 

[Danger]

Ask them if they have no lives of their own, that they're so fascinated by yours.

 

[Mattara]

Pinch their hands and start licking them in the face. That should give some reactions.

 

[mattmns]

You're just a very intriguing person

 

[Lisa!]

You're just a very intriguing person

I guess I'm just different from them! Ah perhaps that's because I've grown up with boys...

 

[Lisa!]

Ask them if they have no lives of their own, that they're so fascinated by yours.

Well I've told them so many times that "Mind their own business" but it seems that they don't get it!
Ah what kills me is that they are good friends and I really owe them for their help and support! I can't be harsh on them more than that.

 

[chroot]

You're annoyed because your "good friends" want to know more about you? C'mon, why does that upset you?

- Warren

 

[arildno]

Remember that that co-worker feels ignored and is envious of the attention you're getting..

 

[Lisa!]

You're annoyed because your "good friends" want to know more about you? C'mon, why does that upset you?

- Warren

No, it's not that! How would you like it that someone(or some people) always keep an eye on what you're doing, wearing , eating,...? I guess you also think that it's not too polite to ask people about their private livesand want to know the reason of any action of yours,eh?

 

[Pengwuino]

No, it's not that! How would you like it that someone(or some people) always keep an eye on what you're doing, wearing , eating,...? I guess you also think that it's not too polite to ask people about their private livesand want to know the reason of any action of yours,eh?

See, privacy is dead in this country. The governments just the last one to take advantage

 

[arildno]

Odd. I'm at a loss of finding out how to connect this thread up to Hitler and the Dangers of Nazism..
Can you help me, Lisa!?

 

[chroot]

I dunno. I share my private life with my "good friends," since that's pretty much what friends are for. If you're not willing to discuss your private life with a person, that person is likely not a "good friend" at all, IMO.

- Warren

 

[Lisa!]

arildno, they remind me of SS agents!

I dunno. I share my private life with my "good friends," since that's pretty much what friends are for. If you're not willing to discuss your private life with a person, that person is likely not a "good friend" at all, IMO.

- Warren

Right! But I guess we don't get to decide whether someone is a good friend or not after 3 months!I mean we need more time!

 

[arildno]

Then, the answer must be that you are physically very attractive.
People always want to sniff beauty's perfume.

 

[chroot]

You already stated that they were good friends. Now, you're not so sure? Perhaps they've come to think of you as a good friend, and don't see their interest in your personal life as inappropriate.

- Warren

 

[Cyrus]

How on Earth some of people are always interfering in everything!(am I interfering here? )
So I don't know what's strange about me that my coworkers always talk about me more than anyone else and have lots of questions about me. They talk about my way of speaking, appearance , what I eat, how I work, what I wear, that's pretty annoying! I just feel that I'm always monitored. OMG! Today 1 of them asked me to bring 1 of my childhood's photo to see how I looked like as a kid!
I know somehow that's because I'm new there but hey I'm not the only new 1 and I've noticed that they almost never ask her questions! Ah the problem is that wherever I go the situation is like that and it seems to me that they never lose their interest to know more ad moreabout me!
Am I a weirdo?

Yep, you are a weirdo, now make me some food!

 

[Schrodinger's Dog]

Simply become bland, when people ask you interesting questions drone on for ages about seemingly related but boring topics, you know like if the conversation started out as when you were a kid did you do well at school, say ok but your hobbies got in the way for example go into how you used to have an obsession with collecting stamps from the Baltics that bordered on an obsession and then go on to tell them that in fact you can tell such and such a stamp from Poland is genuine as it has 32 dimples on it's edges. And then go onto describe the precise etymology of dimples.

If someone tries to involve you in a lively conversation about the situation in Israel/Berituit simply say you don't like politics, particularly in the middle East because you had a grandmother from Damascus who used to knit cradigans that were really itchy and what was worse they were always brown, did you know that brown is a dull colour because of the (go into depth about QM, assuming you work with non physicists) If not go into the history of die making. Eventually people will stop taking an interest in you and you can disappear into the background, don't go to far though you may end up becoming completely invisible.

slowly but surely develop a monotonous drawl too.

Another idea I had was to intimate you have a history of insanity, that way people will be wary about digging to deep into your past. Later you can dismiss this as nonsense but the doubt will linger...

Or you could just get used to the fact that people are generally nosy about lively interesting strangers, and that eventually there curiosity will die as frankly no ones that interesting, either that, or, an even more lively interesting person will be hired and you'll end up discarded like yesterdays news. Yeah that's it enjoy it while it lasts tomorrow you will be dead to everyone most likely, staring into the abyss of non existence. Or something like that. Good luck.

 

[Lisa!]

You already stated that they were good friends. Now, you're not so sure? Perhaps they've come to think of you as a good friend, and don't see their interest in your personal life as inappropriate.

- Warren

Yeah, you're right! I don't deny that the part of problem is with me. I think there's no sense in sharing your private life with others especially at work while others have a different idea. The thing is that I've met very few people who keep what you tell them only fro themselves. Lemme give you an example. I told 1 of my coworkers that I might want to get a day off so that I can't be the 1 who'd do the stuff instead of her(she wanted to get the same day off as me) I just told her that I'm not sure yet! woohoo! I finally went to work at that day, and what'd happened? Everyone asked me why I went to work that day! Yeah, in fact everyone knew that I wanted that day off. It's just 1 of examples. The other annoying thing is that they ask me questions regarding to that personal matters in front of others like my boss or other people whom I'm not close to them. I mean they speak so loudly that anyone can hear what we're talking about. That causes some problems for me. Don't tell me that they are not good friends only becauseof that defect in personality, ok?