Feeling Demotivated About Going Out?
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dontdisturbmycircles
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I would put it at once a week, I would like to maybe go out 2x a week but I am really busy lately :-(. I need to go out at least once a week or else I find it hard to keep working etc.
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For me, it's somewhere between once and twice a week. I normally go out on Friday nights for a major night out, then either saturday sometimes (as my friend manages a bar!) or a random night of the week when there's football on. At the moment, however, it's nearer to none, since exams are on their way!
I have, like yourself radou, feel less motivation to go out this year. I think it's because I'm in my fourth year at university, getting a little older, and just can't really function well the day after a night out! Back in my first year, I used to go out most nights of the week, and still make morning lectures (although the state i was in left much to be desired!). I don't know how I did it! However now work piles on, and thus forces me to stay in!
I have, like yourself radou, feel less motivation to go out this year. I think it's because I'm in my fourth year at university, getting a little older, and just can't really function well the day after a night out! Back in my first year, I used to go out most nights of the week, and still make morning lectures (although the state i was in left much to be desired!). I don't know how I did it! However now work piles on, and thus forces me to stay in!
Evo
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Sorry Radou, had to edit your poll to add "never".
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I put once a month, but then I don't 'go out' like I used to. 
Back in early years of uni, I'd go out Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights, and usually drank a lot of beer.
When I changed schools, I got more serious and stopped going out.
After I got married, and especially having kids, going out was very limited.
Now, the only times I go out are when I'm travelling, and when its with a client, it's a pretty subdued event.
Back in early years of uni, I'd go out Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights, and usually drank a lot of beer.
When I changed schools, I got more serious and stopped going out.
After I got married, and especially having kids, going out was very limited.
Now, the only times I go out are when I'm travelling, and when its with a client, it's a pretty subdued event.
Hmmm. We'll have to do something about that.
Four
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I feel depressed kind of from reading this as I basically never go out. I need to get more friends. Well also going out usually involves to go spend some money, my friends tipically goto the movies or somewhere like that to hang out. Well I live with my mother and my father doesn't support me at all, so I can't usually afford anything. I finished first year of university and got hired as a programmer hopefully I'll be able to make enough money to do something. I start work tomorow.
dontdisturbmycircles
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Congratulations on the new job, Four. :-)
Crosson
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I only have a couple of friends, but we get together most days to take-our-medicine / say-our-prayers. For me the key to a good social life is location, location, location. The only time I have 'friends' (as opposed to aquantainces) is when there are people for whom it is so mutually convenient to hang out that we can frequently do so for a short time. I don't go out and party (because I don't drink alcohol), but I go to afternoon-evening gatherings nearly everyday.
Ki Man
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I think its beeen almost a year since I've actually taken time outside of school events to hang out with my friends... I never get invited to stuff.
trajan22
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Can anyone really honestly vote never. Everybody has been out at least once in their lifetime.
light_bulb
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used to be every day now it's almost never, need to find that happy medium.
moe darklight
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about once a week... some weeks more, some weeks I just stay home. My friends do it every day rain or shine... I don't know how they do it. I can't spend that much time with people. I need my time alone and lots of it or I go insane.
Homework Helper
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radou said:Hence, it does help you in your studies in a way.
You got me there!
As for definition of party in the bender sense, I've been to quite a few, but it's not what i frequent, i prefer gatherings with booze and friends. Sometimes, i might smoke depending on the event and if there are cigars
.
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Going out can be expensive though. That's probably the biggest problem.
I never keep track of how much I spend, but the last time my friend and I went out drinking and drank quite a bit, he spent like $150 I think. He doesn't know either. He spotted me, and I just pay for him later. We never keep track of who owes what.
The craziest part was when we went to Boston Pizza and just chilled out and stuff. At the end, we got a bill of $100 for 2 people!
Another issue is when you work in the morning... oh boy. I'll plan to be out for until like 1 or 2 or so, and it always end up being like 5am.
I don't go out that much personally, but I'm trying to pick it up a bit. So, we'll see how that goes.
I never keep track of how much I spend, but the last time my friend and I went out drinking and drank quite a bit, he spent like $150 I think. He doesn't know either. He spotted me, and I just pay for him later. We never keep track of who owes what.
The craziest part was when we went to Boston Pizza and just chilled out and stuff. At the end, we got a bill of $100 for 2 people!
Another issue is when you work in the morning... oh boy. I'll plan to be out for until like 1 or 2 or so, and it always end up being like 5am.
I don't go out that much personally, but I'm trying to pick it up a bit. So, we'll see how that goes.
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Mk
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I hate parties. I hate parties with drunk people more.
Leopold Infeld
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I have actually never been to any party before LOL!
Crosson
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From your story Jason, I guessed you were in Canada, and your profile confirmed. The bars over there are sooo nice and snazzy, they are almost worth the insane prices. The Canadian government taxes booze to reduce consumption, not to make a profit like the US.
To anyone who hates parties, or hasn't been to one, my suggestion is to spend time finding out who you are. A reason for a party to suck, is if you are not happy being human and you just want to be a physics recluse. We can all be happy being human, and enjoy and thus get invited and go to parties, if we are happy with our bodies and our social image: the way we come across to others.
To anyone who hates parties, or hasn't been to one, my suggestion is to spend time finding out who you are. A reason for a party to suck, is if you are not happy being human and you just want to be a physics recluse. We can all be happy being human, and enjoy and thus get invited and go to parties, if we are happy with our bodies and our social image: the way we come across to others.
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Mk
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Yes, that's exactly why.Crosson said:
I don't like parties because there are people there I do not know, basically. If I could invite specific people to my own party, then I would love that a lot. Except I also hate hosting parties, so that's too bad.
moe darklight
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haha boston pizza, I am going karaoke this week there it's my buddy's birthday.
I guess the Canadian government wants to reduce consumption of everything then
I dunno, I'm not big on bars like my friends. House parties much better. I host sick BBQ's that usually last till 4 or 5 AM and those are fun too (I just had one last night actually).
at house parties you can always start a jam session and do pretty much whatever you want. ... but the bar scene is kind of lame, I feel like everyone is trying to put on a show, especially the girls who go to bars often. club girls are even worse. at house parties you can always talk more in person and have more fun.
Crosson said:
I guess the Canadian government wants to reduce consumption of everything then
I dunno, I'm not big on bars like my friends. House parties much better. I host sick BBQ's that usually last till 4 or 5 AM and those are fun too (I just had one last night actually).
at house parties you can always start a jam session and do pretty much whatever you want. ... but the bar scene is kind of lame, I feel like everyone is trying to put on a show, especially the girls who go to bars often. club girls are even worse. at house parties you can always talk more in person and have more fun.
moe darklight
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Crosson said:
I don't know why "recluse" has such a bad connotation.
I go out often and have plenty of friends and all that, but I really enjoy the time I have to myself too, and I much rather spend the majority of my week by myself than with people.
I don't hate myself or people, I just need time to myself to do things I like doing without company like play music or write or edit video, learn new things, all that... even just sit by the window and think. ... I don't see myself getting married, my longest relationship was about 2 weeks lol (surprise
). I see my friends in relationships and girlfriends and boyfriends and it all seems like too much work, most of them spend all day fighting and are miserable... It's much better to be able to see someone or be with people when I feel like it.
I don't know why society makes it seem like it's such a horrible thing to spend time alone, or like there's something wrong with people who enjoy being by themselves... maybe we live in a society with abandonment issues.
Mk
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Same thing, I guess. Although you have to find the relationship for you if you want one, I also just don't like to hang around or talk with most people. There are several less than ten people that I would give up a day by myself writing music, or doing math, or physics, or video editing, or reading books, or browsing the internet, or pondering my philosophies, to go hang out with.moe darklight said:I don't know why "recluse" has such a bad connotation.
I go out often and have plenty of friends and all that, but I really enjoy the time I have to myself too, and I much rather spend the majority of my week by myself than with people.
I don't hate myself or people, I just need time to myself to do things I like doing without company like play music or write or edit video, learn new things, all that... even just sit by the window and think. ... I don't see myself getting married, my longest relationship was about 2 weeks lol (surprise
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Going out doesn't necessarily mean spending a lot of money, and I'm one who doesn't like spending a lot of money, especially on frivolous things. And I really dislike bars, especially crowded bars with lots of noisy people.
I the later years of my undergrad program, going out meant visiting friends, or going on a date. My best friend was living with his girlfriend, so I used to visit them when I was in town. They would host dinners for various friends so it was a good place to go and hang out and just talk or listen to music. Several people played guitar and other instruments, so we'd listen to live music. I'd help out in the kitchen with the preparation of dinner and then afterward to clean up. That's where I met my wife. She used to help out in the kitchen also, so we eventually used the opportunity to talk.
As for dating, I definitely didn't go to bars, which would be rather counterproductive, and I was not interested in dating women who wanted to go to bars. Dating is a chance to learn about the other person in a mutual exchange. Dating involved going to the park, zoo, a movie or concert, or having a quiet meal in a nice restaurant or perhaps some specialty family restaurant, like Leo's mexican food, or a particular BBQ joint.
As I got toward grad school, the beer drinking got way less, and really only with meals.
I the later years of my undergrad program, going out meant visiting friends, or going on a date. My best friend was living with his girlfriend, so I used to visit them when I was in town. They would host dinners for various friends so it was a good place to go and hang out and just talk or listen to music. Several people played guitar and other instruments, so we'd listen to live music. I'd help out in the kitchen with the preparation of dinner and then afterward to clean up. That's where I met my wife. She used to help out in the kitchen also, so we eventually used the opportunity to talk.
As for dating, I definitely didn't go to bars, which would be rather counterproductive, and I was not interested in dating women who wanted to go to bars. Dating is a chance to learn about the other person in a mutual exchange. Dating involved going to the park, zoo, a movie or concert, or having a quiet meal in a nice restaurant or perhaps some specialty family restaurant, like Leo's mexican food, or a particular BBQ joint.
As I got toward grad school, the beer drinking got way less, and really only with meals.
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Four said:
Good luck!
Crosson said:
That's what I actually miss the most. Such gatherings are rare in my "circle".
moe darklight said:
Same here.
Cyclovenom said:Sometimes, i might smoke depending on the event and if there are cigars
Well, I got to try these cigars you're talking about all the time!
Mk said:
Well, the point of not knowing people is to get to know them, right?
Astronuc said:
Cool!
Astronuc said:
I agree about dating locations, but bars and coffee shops are such a dominant way of socializing (at least where I live), that it appears completely normal to take someone out on a date in a coffee shop/bar. I'd prefer a simple walk, if possible in nature.
Btw, Evo, seems that adding the "never" option to the poll was useful after all..
Mk
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Yes! My team is almost in the lead!Btw, Evo, seems that adding the "never" option to the poll was useful after all.
If I'm not at a party I like to meet people, lots. Just. At parties I don't talk to anybody. Something's just bad about them for me.
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I just can't see 'never' as an option.
When I was a kid, I used to go down the street and play sports like football (US version) or baseball with other kids. When I started dating, I used to go 'out' to a movie, concert, park, museum, . . . but I was quite happy to have my date come to my house, or I'd go to her house and even interact with her parents.
When the kids were young, going out with my wife meant bringing the kids along , unless we could find a brave baby-sitter 
. Now we can leave the kids home, so my wife and I will go out walking or to a bookstore, movie, garden center, park, or a nice quiet restaurant.
In fact, the best time I ever had was walking through a European city for the first time and just seeing the different places, particularly the national art gallery and museum, and some other special places of the person I was with. Later we went to an outdoor market, bought some bread, meats, some greens and vegetables for a salad, and made a lunch back at the person's apartment. We had lunch and talked about work while listening to Mozart.
When I was a kid, I used to go down the street and play sports like football (US version) or baseball with other kids. When I started dating, I used to go 'out' to a movie, concert, park, museum, . . . but I was quite happy to have my date come to my house, or I'd go to her house and even interact with her parents.
When the kids were young, going out with my wife meant bringing the kids along
, unless we could find a brave baby-sitter . Now we can leave the kids home, so my wife and I will go out walking or to a bookstore, movie, garden center, park, or a nice quiet restaurant.That may be the case, but one does not have to do what everyone else does. If I'm on a date, I don't want to be in a noisy and crowded place.
In fact, the best time I ever had was walking through a European city for the first time and just seeing the different places, particularly the national art gallery and museum, and some other special places of the person I was with. Later we went to an outdoor market, bought some bread, meats, some greens and vegetables for a salad, and made a lunch back at the person's apartment. We had lunch and talked about work while listening to Mozart.