Girlfriend leaves me for no apparent reason

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Maylis

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It's been two months and I still think about her daily. I am just so disappointed in her for doing this. We have had very minimal communication almost none. I don't know what to do to get over this. Other girls just don't make me feel the same way she does.

Should I tell her how I feel or do I say nothing? I have no idea what is going on with her, but it seems so cruel of her to leave me for no good reason, especially after I helped her out a lot and then she won't even try to contact me, feels like she just doesn't care about me at all.

By the way I apologized the next day about what I said, and she accepted and didn't seem upset about it at all. Just putting it out there for any responses that try to address that as the most prominent reason.
 

Monique

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You are entitled to feel that way, but it would be best for you to let her go. No good can come from this situation. Other girls don't make you feel the same way she does, because you haven't let go yet. Time to accept: she's just not that into you. It doesn't matter if she has a good reason or not. She might care about you or not, but clearly she has shown that she's not the right person to have a relationship with.
 

Evo

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Absolutely agree with Monique. Your obsession with this girl is unhealthy. I don't think she was evil in trying to make herself love you, at least she did the right thing and told you she doesn't and won't. She's moved on and you should too. Don't pretend that she's coming back. You aren't allowing yourself to see how great other girls are due to some fantasy about this girl. That's a recipe for disaster.
 

Astronuc

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. . . . I had the pleasure of cussing her out and saying all the bad things about her, so at least I feel better now.
It's been two months and I still think about her daily. I am just so disappointed in her for doing this. We have had very minimal communication almost none. I don't know what to do to get over this. Other girls just don't make me feel the same way she does.

Should I tell her how I feel or do I say nothing? I have no idea what is going on with her, but it seems so cruel of her to leave me for no good reason, especially after I helped her out a lot and then she won't even try to contact me, feels like she just doesn't care about me at all.

By the way I apologized the next day about what I said, and she accepted and didn't seem upset about it at all. Just putting it out there for any responses that try to address that as the most prominent reason.
It seems one burned that bridge. One cussed her out and ostensibly insulted her, then apologized later. If she readily accepted one's apology, then perhaps she's not too invested in the relationship, and maybe she's moved on.

It would be best to let it go and learn from the experience. Certainly pay attention to the other person and the relationship.

When my relationships fizzled, I'd thank the girl for the time we had together, and I wish them well. I'm grateful for the wonderful times I had with the women who invested some of themselves with me, and I honestly hope they find that one special relationship. I married a fine woman 32 years ago after being engaged for 1 year, which was after dating for several months.
 

Maylis

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Absolutely agree with Monique. Your obsession with this girl is unhealthy. I don't think she was evil in trying to make herself love you, at least she did the right thing and told you she doesn't and won't. She's moved on and you should too. Don't pretend that she's coming back. You aren't allowing yourself to see how great other girls are due to some fantasy about this girl. That's a recipe for disaster.

Hello evo. I can agree with you, but I'm curious about your thoughts on the fact that she waited until she found someone else. I do not think she would have left me unless she found someone else first. She could have ended it months ago on her own without the reason having to be another person. That is part if what upsets me so much it really is an ego thing.
 

Evo

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Hello evo. I can agree with you, but I'm curious about your thoughts on the fact that she waited until she found someone else. I do not think she would have left me unless she found someone else first. She could have ended it months ago on her own without the reason having to be another person. That is part if what upsets me so much it really is an ego thing.
Well, that shows badly upon her. I know quite a few women that stay with men they don't care about until they find someone else, they just don't want to be "alone". It's really not right to use the poor guy that way. She should have broken up with you sooner and not led you on, shame on her!

The answer is still the same. Forget her! Find someone normal.
 
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lisab

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Well, that shows badly upon her. I know quite a few women that stay with men they don't care about until they find someone else, they just don't want to be "alone". It's really not right to use the poor guy that way. She should have broken up with you sooner and not led you on, shame on her!

The answer is still the same. Forget her! Find someone normal.
Yep!

Lots of women can't stand the thought of being "unattached". This is a sign of immaturity.

I feel for you, Maylis, it hurts like hell to get your heart broken. But now you have to conscientiously choose to heal yourself. This may be the hardest thing you do in your life, but you can do it, and you must.

Find other things to do. Get busy! Read books. Pursue hobbies. Join clubs - Meetup is great!

http://www.meetup.com/

You have to move on.
 

Choppy

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Hello evo. I can agree with you, but I'm curious about your thoughts on the fact that she waited until she found someone else. I do not think she would have left me unless she found someone else first. She could have ended it months ago on her own without the reason having to be another person. That is part if what upsets me so much it really is an ego thing.
I don't know if it helps, but sometimes people don't realize how they really feel about a relationship until someone else jumps into the picture and perturbs things. That doesn't necessarily mean that she was immature or needs to be with someone or was leading you on for some malicious reason. Some people just proceed on auto-pilot, particularly if they don't know anything else. Then when another option is presented, it becomes a trigger - the auto-pilot disengages and the current relationship is re-evaluated.

The best thing to do about it is to move on. I know that's easier said than done sometimes, but beating yourself up over questions about why she made the choices she did really doesn't put you in a better position. Learn what you can from it, and then bounce back. There are a lot of other options out there and some of them are really good ones.
 
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You are entitled to feel that way, but it would be best for you to let her go. No good can come from this situation. Other girls don't make you feel the same way she does, because you haven't let go yet. Time to accept: she's just not that into you. It doesn't matter if she has a good reason or not. She might care about you or not, but clearly she has shown that she's not the right person to have a relationship with.
I couldn't agree more.

Repeat after the lyrics:

NSYNC Bye said:
♫I know that I can't take no more, it ain't no lie. I want to see you out that door. Baby bye, bye, bye.♫
But for real, you should bye bye her.

EDIT: Anything else I could say has already been told.
 

jim hardy

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Yes, move on..

 
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drizzle

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It's gonna take some time, Maylis. Hopefully you're feeling better than what you were feeling a month ago. Try to spend some time to explore things you found interesting/liked before just didn't have the time for it. Learn something totally new to you. Just get busy.
 
Hi ,
If I were you,if I were in such a situation,the first thing that will give me a headache is trying to understand the others person's behaviour,I was in such a situation,and I was wasting a lot of time studying a guy's behavious,but it did not help me,because what i realised was that it is never possible to fully understand someone ;so it will not be helpful if you kept wondering why she behaved the way she did,but let's suppose that it is necessary to understand someone in order to have a good relation with that one,well,in this situation all hyou hav to care about is you emotions,you are a 22 years old ,young and full of energy;there much more important things in life to do rather than to let someone hurt you,concerning what you said about her being the only girl to make you feel happy,well i am, sure that there must be hundreds of girls who will make you feel happier,there are thousands of thousands of girls in this world,and as you found the first girl before,you could find another one,
and the day you will find that girl,you will be saying to yourself:why was I wasting my time being sorry about her loss,it did not deserve,here i am happy and the only thing that still hurts me is the time I lost thinking about the past .you will forget ,don't worry.bt try not to think about her or to talk with her,or even to see her;believe me this will help you forget her;and surtout don't let your heart believe that she is the best,do the opposite,try to remember only the worse things about her,I assure you will find lots.
 

Chronos

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Stop with the pity party. It wasn't what she wanted. Would you feel better had she broken up before finding a new squeeze? That's not how it works. Would you be happy in a relationship with someone who violated your trust? Get over it and move on. It's a big ocean.
 

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