Gmail or Hotmail for a 12-year-old child?

[lisab]

Then I find it ok. Sorry if I misinterpreted your sentence "get his password".
(Although I really think a 12 year old in general should be mature enough to be able to handle a private e-mail account. Of course some are not, but, as Evo said, that holds for some adults too.)

Well, I do agree that by age 12, most kids are getting pretty savvy about the world. I don't remember what age she was when I set up that account for her...eight or nine, maybe. At that age I checked her account quite often. But as she got older I checked it less and less.

In this instance, I had sent her a funny email but she didn't respond after several days, so I checked her account and found this conversation with this guy...but the messages were maybe a few weeks old by that time.

I didn't take offense at your comment, no worries! People have wildly different ideas about raising kids, and on a forum such as this with members from around the world, the spectrum is especially broad.

 

[Moonbear]

(Although I really think a 12 year old in general should be mature enough to be able to handle a private e-mail account. Of course some are not, but, as Evo said, that holds for some adults too.)

Perhaps mature enough, but maybe not experienced enough to recognize when they're getting into a dangerous situation, especially if this is a new privilege for him. At least in my view (and I realize not everyone agrees on these sorts of things), when you give a kid a new privilege, it needs to go along with some oversight at first to ensure they are handling it appropriately, and as they demonstrate their ability to handle the responsibility that goes with it, then you back off and let them become more independent.

Quite frankly, there are things I've encountered online that I'm not old enough to have seen. I would not want a 12-year-old stumbling across it and having to explain to them why people would do things like that.

 

[Andre]

Here is something that should make you wanting to know what's going on in your kids mailbox:

http://poverty.suite101.com/article.cfm/cyber_bullying_can_kill

Cyberbullying is not a minor silly teenage problem. Some kids become so upset from the bullying that they kill themselves over it.

Cyberbullying or electronic bullying is becoming a major problem for many young people and it can be so hurtful that some have even resorted to suicide to stop the pain. Since cyberbullying happens electronically it’s more secretive.

I seem to remember a case discussed in The Netherlands.

 

[lisab]

Here is something that should make you wanting to know what's going on in your kids mailbox:

http://poverty.suite101.com/article.cfm/cyber_bullying_can_kill



I seem to remember a case discussed in The Netherlands.

Ugh. I despise bullies. They're all cowards, and to bully using e-mail, IM, etc., is especially cowardly.

 

[glondor]

Thanks for all your input everyone. My son has done a good job convincing me to get him hotmail for the antispam features. Athhough he is only 12 he can use logic and reason pretty well and he presents his case well. I think I have a budding litigator! FYI these are the rules he agreed to.
1.
I will not give out personal information such as my address, telephone number, parents’ work address/telephone number, or the name and location of my school without my parents’ permission.*

2.
I will tell my parents right away if I come across any information that makes me feel uncomfortable.

3.
I will never agree to get together with someone I “meet” online without first checking with my parents. If my parents agree to the meeting, I will be sure that it is in a public place and bring my mother or father along.

4.
I will never send a person my picture or anything else without first checking with my parents.*

5.
I will not respond to any messages that are mean or in any way make me feel uncomfortable. It is not my fault if I get a message like that. If I do I will tell my parents right away so that they can contact the service provider.

6.
I will talk with my parents so that we can set up rules for going online. We will decide upon the time of day that I can be online, the length of time I can be online and appropriate areas for me to visit. I will not access other areas or break these rules without their permission.

7.
I will not give out my Internet password to anyone (even my best friends) other than my parents.

8.
I will check with my parents before downloading or installing software or doing anything that could possibly hurt our computer or jeopardize my family’s privacy*

9.
I will be a good online citizen and not do anything that hurts other people or is against the law.

10.
I will help my parents understand how to have fun and learn things online and teach them things about the Internet, computers and other technology.

 

[Evo]

That sounds wonderful!

 

[Moonbear]

Thanks for all your input everyone. My son has done a good job convincing me to get him hotmail for the antispam features. Athhough he is only 12 he can use logic and reason pretty well and he presents his case well. I think I have a budding litigator! FYI these are the rules he agreed to.
1.
I will not give out personal information such as my address, telephone number, parents’ work address/telephone number, or the name and location of my school without my parents’ permission.*

2.
I will tell my parents right away if I come across any information that makes me feel uncomfortable.

3.
I will never agree to get together with someone I “meet” online without first checking with my parents. If my parents agree to the meeting, I will be sure that it is in a public place and bring my mother or father along.

4.
I will never send a person my picture or anything else without first checking with my parents.*

5.
I will not respond to any messages that are mean or in any way make me feel uncomfortable. It is not my fault if I get a message like that. If I do I will tell my parents right away so that they can contact the service provider.

6.
I will talk with my parents so that we can set up rules for going online. We will decide upon the time of day that I can be online, the length of time I can be online and appropriate areas for me to visit. I will not access other areas or break these rules without their permission.

7.
I will not give out my Internet password to anyone (even my best friends) other than my parents.

8.
I will check with my parents before downloading or installing software or doing anything that could possibly hurt our computer or jeopardize my family’s privacy*

9.
I will be a good online citizen and not do anything that hurts other people or is against the law.

10.
I will help my parents understand how to have fun and learn things online and teach them things about the Internet, computers and other technology.

Bravo! I especially like 10. Gotta have a sense of humor when making up rules for pre-teens.