This has gotten very long, so I'm going to make my main point in advance. That point is that one of the reasons we have so many standards is the relativity of simultaneity, a key feature of SR that is inherited by GR. For extremely high precision applications, when we adopt the concept of different ideas of spatial symmetry, we wind up with different notions of simultaneity.
Going a bit more into the weeds. I find that clock synchronization makes more sense from the viewpoint of a coordinate system, such as the GCRS and the ICRS.
I say this because that's what a coordinate system does - it includes not only clocks (which keep proper time) , but how to use them to specify locations and times. This ability implies the ability to synchronize clocks, by simply saying that clocks that share the same time coordinate are synchronized. It also addresses the rate issue - we can compare the rates of actual clocks to the rate of coordinate clocks, and perform appropriate adjustments as needed.
Thus, coordinates encapsulates not only how to keep track of time intervals, but also how to synchronize clocks and define coordinate numbers that represent time and place. The relativity of simultaneity comes into play here, that is why it is important to combine the discussion of spatial coordinates and time coordinates into a system of space-time coordinates. Definitions that do not include a complete coordinate system tend, unfortunately, to neglect the entire idea of simultaneity, which ultimateley winds up as a conceptual weakness.
The approach I am most familiar with is outlined in Misner's "Precis of General Relativity".
https://arxiv.org/abs/gr-qc/9508043. I should not that it doesn't have an overwhelmingly high citation count, but it's key to my thought processes and I highly recommend it.
Misner said:
(1) dτ^2 = [1 + 2(V − Φ0)/c^2]dt^2 − [1 − 2V /c^2](dx^2 + dy^2 + dz^2)/c^2
....
Equation (1) defines not only the gravitational field that is assumed, but
also the coordinate system in which it is presented. There is no other source
of information about the coordinates apart from the expression for the met-
ric. It is also not possible to define the coordinate system unambiguously in
any way that does not require a unique expression for the metric. In most
cases where the coordinates are chosen for computational convenience, the
expression for the metric is the most efficient way to communicate clearly
the choice of coordinates that is being made. Mere words such as “Earth
Centered Inertial coordinates” are ambiguous unless by convention they are
understood to designate a particular expression for the metric, such as equa-
tion (1).
The IAU papers are very terse, but appear to follow the approach outlined by Misner, as they specify a metric associated with their various coordinate systems they define. The short version is that they specify using what is known as "harmonic coordinates".
The paper that originated this thread basically extends this to adding a Lunar-based coordinate system since we are talking about having people live there.
So, to recap, fundamentally, specifying a metric implies specifying a coordinate system. The metric can be thought of as a sort of mathematical "map" of space-time.
To recap my main point in more detail, I will point out again the role of the relativity of simultaneity. If one loosk at the transformation equations, clocks synchronized in the GCRS may not be synchronized in the ICRS, though the differences are tiny. To oversimplify, note that respecting the Earth's symmetry (axisymmetric for sure, and mostly spherically symmetric) does not respect a sun-based notion of symmetry.
This extra complexity with it's variety of coordinate systems is needed to realize the full accuracy of which General Relativity is capable of, though for many applications, one can get away with approximations which simplify things enormously. The extra complexity is really only needed for extremely precise work. For example, are as of yet few applications for Earth- based timekeeping where the lunar and solar tides have an important effect - as can be seen by Misner totally ignoring such effects in his equation (1), which is notably not necessary the same as any of the standards that I've mentioned.
There are applications in astronomy where we need to account for the varying distance of the Earth from the sun to account for effects on pulsar timing. As our timekeeping gets more and more precise, accounting for all the various effects will become more necessary to realize the full potential precision of the new methods.