Smart or Attractive? Biology's Debate on Selection

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The discussion revolves around a hypothetical choice between selecting a mate based on intelligence versus physical attractiveness. Participants express varying opinions on the importance of these traits, with many emphasizing that intelligence is crucial for long-term compatibility, while others admit to prioritizing looks, especially in casual relationships. The conversation touches on the societal pressures and perceptions surrounding beauty and intelligence, with some acknowledging that beauty fades over time, making intelligence a more stable choice for a lasting partnership. Humor and sarcasm are prevalent, with some participants joking about the extremes of their choices and the implications of dating someone who is either very attractive but not smart or vice versa. Ultimately, the consensus leans towards valuing intelligence, compassion, and personality over mere physical appearance, although many acknowledge the complexity of real-life relationships and the unrealistic nature of the binary choice presented.

If made to choose, what would be your choice?

  • your mate would be intelligent but homely

    Votes: 63 65.6%

  • your mate would be beautiful but dumb

    Votes: 33 34.4%
  • Total voters
    96
  • #181
W3pcq said:
At first site I would go for the attractive one because I wouldn't know she was dumb and wouldn't know if the ugly one was intelligent. As a choice between the two given I knew these traits about them and nothing about their kindness and compassion or whatever or how easy they are to get along with, I would choose the intelligent one as a wife and mother.

I think according to the compliments that Dr. Phil gives about the people he interviews with 'problems'---is that anyone who doesn't use "ain't" in the same sentence twice, he considers 'intelligent' and they're always attractive.

When I was dogging at the bars way back when, those two words always brought a smile as compliments---especially if used in the same sentence to the prospective lovely I was talking to.
 
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  • #182
Dr. Phil blows.
 
  • #183
Shackleford said:
Dr. Phil blows.

WHAT?!----don't you think he helped Britney?
 
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  • #184
When is storming into a mentally unstable person's hospital room unannounced with a camera crew considered not helpful?
 
  • #185
Why do we have to choose between smarts and looks? Can't we have both? Just take a look at myself. :biggrin:

On another note, I would reject both offers.
 
  • #186
I think smarts are quite attractive- Remember, the pretty dumb ones like to talk too and guess who they will want to discuss things with? How much time in one day you spend with your significant other being intimate as compared to the rest of the day? Pointless bla bla bla talks about curling irons or the gym.
 
  • #187
Evo said:
Be honest, if you had only two choices, your mate could either be very intelligent, but homely, or beautiful and dumb, which would you choose?

That's easy: The one who's better in bed. :biggrin:
 
  • #188
Tom Mattson said:
That's easy: The one who's better in bed. :biggrin:
Finally an honest answer from a man! :biggrin:
 
  • #189
How about I just pick her:

meganfox-fhm.jpg
 
  • #190
The current Miss America was on "Are you smarter than a 5th grader?" last night. She's not dumb, but when they asked which planetary body in our solar system contains the most mass, her answer was "the Universe".
 
  • #191
Isn't ugliness only skin deep? Who'd want that? :biggrin:
 
  • #192
Tom Mattson said:
That's easy: The one who's better in bed. :biggrin:

Evo said:
Finally an honest answer from a man! :biggrin:
Nah, that can be learned from practice. LOTS and LOTS of practice.

I just want someone that I wouldn't mind waking up next to, and that doesn't mind tolerating me on a regular basis. I'd rather build my life around those I love than find people to love that suit the way I want to build my life. Neither intelligence nor beauty are very high on the list of things that I view as important for a long term relationship. I don't see relationships as a means to further ambitions. If love isn't the most important thing to both of us then I wouldn't bother to stick around. The love is all I care about in any relationship, and that's more important than any attribute.
 
  • #193
so the idea maybe is also---how would you attract a mate, or how did you attract your mate?--how do you think you attracted your mate?

your looks and body language?

the things you talk about?

or what percentage of each?
 
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  • #194
I'm a sucker for a pretty face. I'm brainwashed by the stereotypical representation of physical beauty. So looks definitely do get my attention before anything else. Sharing physical attributes is nice, but loses it's commodity quickly if no basis for a more serious relationship forms.

Body language is pretty important to me, more so than the topic of conversation. I gather more from body language than I do from speech. If she wants to have a half-hour conversation about a double-printed M&M then I'd be fascinated. Or we might not talk at all while going for a 5 mile hike up some mountainside, and I'd still be fascinated. I'm easy. Any woman that genuinely enjoys my company I find very appealing.

I have a bad habit of being abrasive one moment and sympathetic the next. It usually revolves around some moral principle, which are touchy subjects. So probably the most important qualities that I look for is understanding. Oddly, I don't require strong moral values, just someone that will put up with me ranting about it occassionally. She could even laugh at me if she wanted. I would find that refreshing. No obligations, small expectations; a natural rhythm that isn't too complicated or labor intensive would be ideal. Ideal for me is something like a roomate with benefits.

I'm not currently looking for a relationship. I think it would be a bad idea for me or anyone I might get involved with at this point in time. If she were as damaged as I am then I might consider it. We could both be messed up together and have a bunch of messed up kids. That would be fun!
 
  • #195
Who posted this thread/poll? Don't you know it's like torture to a guy?
Shackleford-Very very nice! Give me a hot brunette anyday over the stereotypical blonde!
Anyways, I really can't answer that. I find a combination of the two qualities!
 
  • #196
binzing said:
Who posted this thread/poll? Don't you know it's like torture to a guy?
Shackleford-Very very nice! Give me a hot brunette anyday over the stereotypical blonde!
Anyways, I really can't answer that. I find a combination of the two qualities!

Yeah, man, I'm definitely a sucker for the brunettes. That's Megan Fox, by the way, the Transformers chick.
 
  • #197
High five!(borat voice,...I'm sorry but I love how Cohen says that)

BTW...her last name definitely fits!
 
  • #198
EnumaElish said:
Isn't ugliness only skin deep? Who'd want that? :biggrin:

No, it's beauty that's only skin deep.

Ugly goes all the way down to the bone.
 
  • #199
Also, another factor for me is whethere the beauty is artifical or natural. If its fake, I'd rather take the ugly/smart combo.
 
  • #200
Evo said:
Oh, OH. We're talking now baybee. Put a copy of the Heimskringla in his hands, a glass of sherry in the other. (wait, can you dress him in a silk smoking jacket and an ascot? :!)


OK - Clean shaven, smoking jacket (without the smoking) and ascot.
http://img85.imageshack.us/img85/7950/dilbertwhairjacketrt1.jpg​
[/URL]





with a basket of goodies and the Heimskringla!
http://img179.imageshack.us/img179/1289/dilbertwhairnobeardgooddn5.jpg​
[/URL]






Now - to set the mood for Heimskringla
http://img136.imageshack.us/img136/685/dilbertwhairjackethornsba4.jpg​
[/URL]
 
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  • #201
Astronuc said:
http://img179.imageshack.us/img179/1289/dilbertwhairnobeardgooddn5.jpg​
[/URL]

Wow, somehow you've made Dilbert look HOT! :bugeye: :smile: Maybe we should post this in the thread about clothes to show how dressing nicely can make a world of difference in how your appearances are perceived.
 
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  • #202
Astronuc said:
OK - Clean shaven, smoking jacket (without the smoking) and ascot.
http://img85.imageshack.us/img85/7950/dilbertwhairjacketrt1.jpg​
[/URL]





with a basket of goodies and the Heimskringla!
http://img179.imageshack.us/img179/1289/dilbertwhairnobeardgooddn5.jpg​
[/URL]






Now - to set the mood for Heimskringla
http://img136.imageshack.us/img136/685/dilbertwhairjackethornsba4.jpg​
I[/URL] LOVE IT! That's my dream man!
 
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  • #203
That guy is so two dimensional.
 
  • #204
Kurdt said:
That guy is so two dimensional.
But, but, he's reading the Heimskringla, one of my favorites.


Edit: Thank you Marcus for introducing me to it and Marcus and Arildno for reading it with me. They both brought so much to it with their insights.
 
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