What is the Latest Adventure of FranzBear and Uncle Artman?

[tribdog]

I'm English, we're all curryaholics

Really? I thought you were catholics.

 

[rocketboy]

*grabs thread*

"Fetch!"

 

[yourdadonapogostick]

/me kills rocketboy and sets fire to FranzBear

 

[jim mcnamara]

This looks like some threads back in the mid 90's on some programming fora.

This googles up for 'franzbear' and aside from incredible viscosity it ain't all that bad...

http://thegoodnessoflife.com/
franzbear lives... in a slow moving world.

PS: this thing goes on and on... fair warning.

 

[lisab]

PS: this thing goes on and on... fair warning.

Jeez, no kidding. It needs a "OK, OK! Now speed the hell up and get on with it!" button.

I kept waiting for a scary face to pop up !

 

[yourdadonapogostick]

I got bored after 10 seconds.

 

[Artman]

Franzbear's teddy? Has my little boy become a transvestite now? *sigh* Oh well, I think he's experimented with just about everything else, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

Sigh. I leave here for just a little while and when I come back, Franzbear is a transvestite! He obviously needs to spend more time with a male role model, like his Uncle Artman.

(Artman dons his psycho mother nightgown)

Franzbear needs a little camping trip into the woods. It should be fun.

 

[Moonbear]

Welcome back, Artman! Where have you been hiding? One of those LONG camping trips with Franzbear? If you're going to take him into the woods, make sure he's wearing his bear suit...the one covered in strips of bacon.

 

[Artman]

Welcome back, Artman! Where have you been hiding? One of those LONG camping trips with Franzbear? If you're going to take him into the woods, make sure he's wearing his bear suit...the one covered in strips of bacon.

Thank you for the welcome back. I've just been doing more writing than anything lately.

Franzbear is wearing his bear suit covered with bacon, and we're first going to go search for honey, so we've also smeared it with maple syrup and sprinkled it with sugar and stuck flowers to it (bees like sweet things and flowers, so they should leave him alone, right?) When we find a big hive, I'm going to let Franz have all the fun and we'll set his bacon on fire to smoke out the bees, and send him in with a great big bucket to grab all the honey.




While I watch from a few miles away. So as not to disturb the bees.

 

[Evo]

Thank you for the welcome back. I've just been doing more writing than anything lately.

Franzbear is wearing his bear suit covered with bacon, and we're first going to go search for honey, so we've also smeared it with maple syrup and sprinkled it with sugar and stuck flowers to it (bees like sweet things and flowers, so they should leave him alone, right?) When we find a big hive, I'm going to let Franz have all the fun and we'll set his bacon on fire to smoke out the bees, and send him in with a great big bucket to grab all the honey.




While I watch from a few miles away. So as not to disturb the bees.

ARTMAN! I know Franzbear is so thrilled to have his Uncle Artman back! Sounds like he's already about to have another fun outing!

 

[Artman]

ARTMAN! I know Franzbear is so thrilled to have his Uncle Artman back! Sounds like he's already about to have another fun outing!

Hi Evo! Franzbear is having a great time!

You know, that flaming bacon turned to hot grease and melted the sugar, syrup and flowers into a strange sort of hard peanut brittle like coating that all the bees have found their way inside somehow; and somehow someone has covered the openings with more of the flaming candy stuff.

He's having a bit of a run at the moment. I think he wants something to drink because he's yelling, "water! Where is some water!" Shame the nearest water is miles away.

 

[Evo]

Omg! Artman, I hope you plan on sticking around for awhile! I can't wait for more of the "Adventures of Franzbear".

 

[Artman]

He's running sort of stiff legged because the coating is hard. He should probably drop the honey bucket, but I think it's stuck to his hand and...

Uhh, Grizzly Bears like honey, don't they?

That would explain what's happening right now. Well, got to go!

 

[Moonbear]

I think he wants something to drink because he's yelling, "water! Where is some water!" Shame the nearest water is miles away.

Oh, there's closer water. A gorgeous waterfalls is just a short distance away.

Franzbear can just lean way out and get a nice drink of fresh water.

AAAAAAAYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE[/size]

Oops, I think I forgot to mention the slippery, moss-covered rocks and the 300' drop.[/size]

 

[Artman]

Fortunately, his candy coating was strong enough for him to survive the fall by simply bouncing off the rocks below and we could resume our pleasant outing.

Franzbear just laid down on the ground to dry out a bit...

It's amazing how fast ants are. Isn't it? They sure do love wet flower, syrup-fried, sugar-coated-honey-drenched, bacon grease covered, fake bear fur.

 

[Evo]

For those of you that do not know - the following exchange between Moonbear and Artman, as regards Franzbear's adventures is something to sit back and behold.

Let the SAGA BEGIN! :!)

 

[Moonbear]

It's amazing how fast ants are. Isn't it? They sure do love wet flower, syrup-fried, sugar-coated-honey-drenched, bacon grease covered, fake bear fur.

Ooh, look! The red ants are winning! Oh, I guess Franzbear wasn't really that tired out afterall, he's up and running around again. Hmm...looks like some strange type of jumping jacks perhaps?

Oh, it seems the ants are stinging a bit. Well, I'll just pour some alcohol on the stings to keep them from getting infected. Oh, dear, there's a lot of them. Okay, I'll just pour the whole bottle over him. Now, Franzbear, go walk over to the campfire and dry off.

FWWOOOOOOOOOMPH[/size]


Oops.

 

[Artman]

Quick! Back to the water to put out the fire!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Oops. Who'd have thought there would be another 300 foot drop so close to the last one?

 

[Moonbear]

*Tosses Franzbear a line to help him out of the water*

THUNK...gurgle gurgle gurgle bloop bloop bloop[/size]

Sorry, I only had the one with the anchor tied to it.

 

[Artman]

Also, it appears that the fire melted the coating again, making it quite sticky...

Franzbear has let go of the anchor line, but he seems to be stuck to the rocks at the bottom of the river...

I'm going to give him a few more hours, perhaps the cold water will reharden the coating and he will unstick...at least that is the hypothesis.

 

[Artman]

Franzbeaer has popped back up to the surface and he said he had time to compose a little note back home.

(To the tune of Camp Granada)

Hello Physics
Hello Forums
I'm in the forest
with uncle Artman.

It is neat here
under water
and Uncle Artman's
dressed up just like Psycho's Mother.
La, la, la.The bacon's crispy
on my bear suit
and I discovered
a grizzly's sweet tooth!

Bees are stinging
inside the coating.
I'm just hoping
Uncle doesn't take me boating.
La, la, la.

Ants have chomped me
from top to tushy.
At the waterfall,
Moonbear got pushy!

See you shortly
if I survive.
With Uncle Artman
I'm lucky just to stay alive.
La, la, la.Hmmm. Boating is not a bad idea. I mean, it should be fun.