Why are parents putting so much pressure on their kids?

Thread starter Evo
Start date Aug 21, 2005
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Hard Kids

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Discussion Overview

The discussion revolves around the pressures parents place on their children and the potential consequences of such pressures, particularly in relation to substance abuse and violent behavior. Participants explore the complexities of parenting styles, the impact of mental health, and societal influences on youth behavior.

Discussion Character

Debate/contested
Exploratory
Conceptual clarification

Main Points Raised

Some participants suggest that the pressures from strict parenting may contribute to negative behaviors, including drug use and violence.
Others argue that drug use and violent behavior may be symptoms of underlying issues rather than direct results of parental pressure.
A participant reflects on their own experience, indicating that curiosity rather than pressure led them to try drugs after their parents eased restrictions.
There is a suggestion that children may use drugs as a form of escapism from unhappy home environments.
Some participants assert that children today have it too easy and attribute behavioral issues to cultural influences rather than parental pressure.
Concerns are raised about the potential for mental illness to play a role in extreme behaviors, such as the violent incident discussed.
There is a division on whether personal responsibility or parental influence is more significant in the outcomes of children's behavior.
Some participants express frustration with the notion that strict parenting alone leads to negative outcomes, arguing that personal choices also play a crucial role.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Participants express a range of views, with no clear consensus on the relationship between parental pressure, drug use, and violent behavior. Some believe strict parenting is harmful, while others argue that children have too much freedom and lack discipline.

Contextual Notes

The discussion includes various assumptions about the nature of parenting, the definition of pressure, and the complexities of mental health, which remain unresolved. Participants reference personal experiences and societal observations that may not apply universally.

Who May Find This Useful

Readers interested in parenting styles, adolescent behavior, mental health issues, and societal influences on youth may find this discussion relevant.

Aug 23, 2005

Evo

Staff Emeritus

Moonbear said:

In contrast, there were kids whose parents were very lax about rules, they could stay out as late as they wanted, go where they wanted, when they wanted, etc. Their parents wanted to be the "cool" parents, but in reality, the kids felt neglected and unloved. Those kids were the ones who got into all sorts of trouble. It doesn't mean they all turned out to be bad people, a lot turned themselves around when they got older and became independent, they just got there a lot slower than the kids who had parents who let them know they cared about them.

I had no rules and no restrictions growing up. I was the happiest, most loved kid of any I knew, made straight A's, never got into trouble. I raised both of my girls the same way and they are great.

I do see the parents of some of my daughter's friends as absolutely unreasonable tyrants that expect perfection from their kids, emotionally abusing them and giving them inferiority complexes. I try to help heal some of the damage their parents have inflicted upon them by recognizing their achievements and giving them positive reinforcement, something they don't get from their own parents. :devil: