Why do you not sit next to people on their own?

  • Thread starter Thread starter nucleargirl
  • Start date Start date
Click For Summary

Discussion Overview

The discussion revolves around social interactions in university settings, particularly the phenomenon of sitting alone and the expectations or fears associated with initiating conversations with strangers. Participants share personal experiences and observations related to loneliness, social anxiety, and the challenges of making connections in a new environment.

Discussion Character

  • Exploratory
  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification

Main Points Raised

  • One participant expresses frustration at not being approached by others while sitting alone, questioning why people do not engage with those who seem lonely.
  • Another participant suggests that societal norms discourage speaking to strangers, citing a personal belief that people are generally hesitant to initiate conversations.
  • Several participants share anecdotes about their own experiences with sitting alone and the varying outcomes of attempts to engage with others.
  • Some participants note that they often feel shy or anxious about starting conversations, indicating that this may be a common barrier to social interaction.
  • There are differing views on whether it is typical for people to approach strangers, with some asserting that it rarely happens and others claiming they frequently receive unsolicited attention.
  • One participant humorously recounts a past experience of approaching someone and being met with a quick dismissal, highlighting the risks involved in initiating contact.
  • Another participant reflects on the fear of being disturbed when sitting alone, suggesting that this anxiety may be prevalent among many individuals.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Participants do not reach a consensus on the reasons for the lack of social interaction among individuals sitting alone. Multiple competing views remain regarding the social norms and personal anxieties that influence these interactions.

Contextual Notes

Some participants express uncertainty about the appropriateness of approaching strangers, indicating a reliance on personal comfort levels and social expectations. The discussion reveals a variety of assumptions about social behavior that may not be universally applicable.

Who May Find This Useful

This discussion may be of interest to individuals navigating social situations in new environments, particularly students in university settings, as well as those exploring themes of social anxiety and interpersonal communication.

  • #61
nucleargirl said:
ok, so I'm living in halls now, and most people stay in their rooms in the evening. the ones in the common room are either watching football or playing a drinking game. I want to do neither but I want to talk to people! Is it too weird to knock on random people's doors and talk to them that way?

Umm, what do you mean by "I'm living in halls now"?
 
Physics news on Phys.org
  • #62
Drakkith said:
Umm, what do you mean by "I'm living in halls now"?

A dorm.

i.e. she's knocking on the doors of fellow dormers, not wandering the dark streets, knocking on the doors of the homes of complete strangers.
 
  • #63
lol! I am living in student accommodation with like 300 other students!
I tried knocking on people's doors today... 3 in fact, and none of them were in!
It is easier to meet people on facebook...
anyway, I can't be bothered now. term's begun, I've got too much work, and yeah.
 
  • #64
Ha, looks like I was dead right about you, if you recall our little exchange. Just so you know I have a girlfriend and she makes me dinner every weekend, and she's great. :approve:

But on the whole topic of sitting next to strangers - why would I? If I have some reason to talk to someone - they're in a class of mine, we're in the same club, or share some common thread, then sure why not - but a total stranger? Just another human who's consuming resources and bringing up the cost of oil as far as I'm concerned, and I have zero interest in meeting random people.
 
  • #65
DaveC426913 said:
A dorm.

i.e. she's knocking on the doors of fellow dormers, not wandering the dark streets, knocking on the doors of the homes of complete strangers.

I'm assuming she has a dorm room and isn't literally living in the halls right?

Nucleargirl, I can tell you exactly why people don't sit next to you. It's because they don't WANT to. The reasons why are varied, but most probably don't enjoy attempting to sit next to a complete stranger and striking up conversation, and to many you simply aren't part of their "bubble" of things they care about.
 
  • #66
Why would they not want to?! ha. impossible :p

ok, I guess yeah, in a normal situation people don't randomly talk to strangers. But I was originally referring to a fresher's week on campus kind of situation! when and where it is the thing to do to meet new people! so I was surprised that people ignored others who were by themselves. But yeah, I guess it all boils down to the same thing.

well, I am actually trying a new thing now. it is called - being independent, and I don't need you to talk to me! I am so badass you'll want to talk to me and I will ignore YOU!
anyway... it seems to be working.
 
  • #67
pergradus said:
Ha, looks like I was dead right about you, if you recall our little exchange. Just so you know I have a girlfriend and she makes me dinner every weekend, and she's great. :approve:

But on the whole topic of sitting next to strangers - why would I? If I have some reason to talk to someone - they're in a class of mine, we're in the same club, or share some common thread, then sure why not - but a total stranger? Just another human who's consuming resources and bringing up the cost of oil as far as I'm concerned, and I have zero interest in meeting random people.

lol! what conversation?? I am very good at forgetting.

I love how you had to preface it all with your girlfriend situation! lol is that how it is now!
 
  • #68
ah... I remember now :p come on! get over it!
 

Similar threads

Do You Trust "Reviews" on Next Door?
  • · Replies 16 ·
Replies
16
Views
3K
You sports people: methods for qualifying (for darts, in this case)
  • · Replies 12 ·
Replies
12
Views
2K
Is It Acceptable to Avoid Social Interaction Entirely?
  • · Replies 54 ·
2
Replies
54
Views
42K
Why do so many people hate science?
  • · Replies 28 ·
Replies
28
Views
12K
News Why do people tend to label entire sectors of society as evil?
  • · Replies 17 ·
Replies
17
Views
7K
How to get along with people who have different Metaphysical viewpoints
  • · Replies 46 ·
2
Replies
46
Views
7K
I want to help Physics education. What should I do?
  • · Replies 76 ·
3
Replies
76
Views
7K
Venting Frustration: Slow People and Routine Tasks
  • · Replies 43 ·
2
Replies
43
Views
7K
Blight of Subwoofers in Cars: Why Do People Do This?
  • · Replies 40 ·
2
Replies
40
Views
11K
Why do some people criticize Ayn Rand's philosophy and literature?
  • · Replies 133 ·
5
Replies
133
Views
58K