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Guys help my brother

by queenstudy
Tags: brother, guys
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queenstudy
#1
Dec2-11, 02:53 PM
P: 102
hey everyone mmm i need some advice for my brother , he is in college in math major and he likes a girl in chemistry major they met in language class and they talked once or twice what do you think my brother should do? i think he really is attracted to her beauty face according to his sayings any advice and thank you
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micromass
#2
Dec2-11, 03:32 PM
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He should engage in some more conversations. See if there is a connection between the two. Talk about what they like and dislike, and so on.

If he has enough courage, then he might ask her out on some kind of date. Just ask if she wants to go and have a drink with him.
bp_psy
#3
Dec4-11, 09:47 AM
P: 452
He should get drunk and go up to her and ask :"You, me and some CHCl3 ?"

queenstudy
#4
Dec4-11, 09:58 AM
P: 102
Guys help my brother

man i really would mind if you would talk better about the situation , rahter than mocking okay please
D4V1D
#5
Dec5-11, 10:03 AM
P: 10
Quote Quote by queenstudy View Post
man i really would mind if you would talk better about the situation , rahter than mocking okay please
Hey, bp psy was just joking. Relax a bit. A sense of humor isn't a bad thing; Girls tend to like that. Now, what kind of humor will she like? That differs from person to person.

Either way, your brother should just talk to her. He should be careful with how quickly he springs up that he likes her, but it's important that they get to know each other. Then, if he still likes her, he should see how she feels about how they've connected. :P
Mentallic
#6
Dec5-11, 11:20 PM
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P: 3,540
Quote Quote by D4V1D View Post
Now, what kind of humor will she like? That differs from person to person.
From my experience, girls tend to do the opposite - if they like you then they'll like your humour

Queenstudy, you've barely given us anything to work with. We don't know anything about your brother, we don't know about how they interact (frequency and location), and we don't know how the relationship between them is. All you've told us was that he finds her pretty. Well, that's nothing new.

Is your brother new to this kind of thing? Like micromass said, does he have the courage and charm to take her out on a date prematurely?
chiro
#7
Dec6-11, 12:31 AM
P: 4,573
Quote Quote by queenstudy View Post
hey everyone mmm i need some advice for my brother , he is in college in math major and he likes a girl in chemistry major they met in language class and they talked once or twice what do you think my brother should do? i think he really is attracted to her beauty face according to his sayings any advice and thank you
Tell him to be himself and if things don't work out, there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Mentallic
#8
Dec6-11, 02:09 AM
HW Helper
P: 3,540
Quote Quote by chiro View Post
Tell him to be himself and if things don't work out, there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Being himself most likely means to stay in his comfort zone and not make any drastic moves like asking her out. That's not always the best move when you like someone
chiro
#9
Dec6-11, 02:22 AM
P: 4,573
Quote Quote by Mentallic View Post
Being himself most likely means to stay in his comfort zone and not make any drastic moves like asking her out. That's not always the best move when you like someone
I see what you are saying, but you can't put on a circus act forever.

It is one thing to be afraid to be yourself in front of someone else and it is another thing to put on a show because you want to impress.

Lets face it, we all have people that we disagree with, can't stand being near, and will for the most part never really like or get along with and that is ok because if everyone agreed with everyone else, the world would be very boring, very non-educational (disagreement causes debate and discourse which helps everyone), and would generally suck.

If its a case of shyness, I would probably suggest to the OPs brother to work on the idea of speaking to the opposite sex and build up a natural confidence around them. The way to see this in action is for the OP to see how her brother acts in the presence of friends and family in comparison to unknown attractive females.
Mentallic
#10
Dec6-11, 02:51 AM
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P: 3,540
Quote Quote by chiro View Post
I see what you are saying, but you can't put on a circus act forever.

It is one thing to be afraid to be yourself in front of someone else and it is another thing to put on a show because you want to impress.

Lets face it, we all have people that we disagree with, can't stand being near, and will for the most part never really like or get along with and that is ok because if everyone agreed with everyone else, the world would be very boring, very non-educational (disagreement causes debate and discourse which helps everyone), and would generally suck.
I wouldn't really count taking a step out of your comfort zone as not being yourself. Everyone does it in the same way they have their good days and bad days. One day you can feel great and portray this by being jolly to everyone, and on another you can feel like just laying in bed eating icecream all day. But putting on a fake cheerful smile on those days doesn't mean that you're not always happy.

But I agree with what you're saying. Acting out as being someone you're not can get tiring fast and is probably bound for failure eventually.

Quote Quote by chiro View Post
If its a case of shyness, I would probably suggest to the OPs brother to work on the idea of speaking to the opposite sex and build up a natural confidence around them. The way to see this in action is for the OP to see how her brother acts in the presence of friends and family in comparison to unknown attractive females.
That would take too long! This girl isn't going to be around forever, and if he is too shy to ask her out then he either has to get over it and sum up the courage to do it, stay as friends, or wait till she (if she) makes the first move.

You shouldn't have to start learning how to gain confidence to ask a girl out when you find a girl you want to ask out. You should have been subconsciously doing that all your life till now.
chiro
#11
Dec6-11, 03:03 AM
P: 4,573
Quote Quote by Mentallic View Post

That would take too long! This girl isn't going to be around forever, and if he is too shy to ask her out then he either has to get over it and sum up the courage to do it, stay as friends, or wait till she (if she) makes the first move.

You shouldn't have to start learning how to gain confidence to ask a girl out when you find a girl you want to ask out. You should have been subconsciously doing that all your life till now.
No reason why he can't just talk to this girl, it can be the start of his portfolio of experience!

One thing though is the whole friend zone thing, and hopefully he finds a relationship without being in that proverbial "friend zone".

So yeah I didn't mean that he needs to do some training before conversing with this particular girl, but I think the idea of there being one girl for every guy and vice-versa is not a sensible thought to have. Even if this one doesn't go well and ends up him being embarrassed a little is ok. I remember what I used to be like and it was pretty bad!!!

Also with regard to your last sentence, a lot of us grow up with the idea that rejection is a bad thing and this equally applies to relationships.

Also for the OPs brothers sake, I hope that he finds a relationship where he doesn't get trampled on by his significant other. Lots of men get into relationships and stay with their significant other out of desperation and in that case they can be used and abused because of this very thing, and I would hate for the OP to be in that situation (this probably isn't the scenario, but I think its important to say this because there are a lot of men in this situation).
queenstudy
#12
Dec6-11, 07:26 AM
P: 102
hello everyone and thank you for being invloved and i hoep i could be helpful in the coming days , i just talked to my brother and here is the situation :
he is second year informatics and she is second year biology , they met in language center which belongs to the university , they had good laugh and fun . My brother that she wont be seen again , the shock is that when university started , some one called my brothers name which turned out to be the same girl , they talked but she was within a group of girls so my brother didnt stay long , but during the conversation she asked him the following : what do you think about me? , he told her she was perfect in a happy tone and left to class she just gave him a smile so what is next???????????????
khemist
#13
Dec6-11, 10:11 PM
P: 267
Get her number and ask her out.
netgypsy
#14
Dec15-11, 07:22 PM
P: 239
Ask if she'd like to go somewhere for coffee or a snack. THEN get the number.


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