Dealing with Test Anxiety in Graduate Physics Programs

[Geezer]

I'm starting my grad program (Physics) this fall (September 2011); the following August (2012), I'll have to take the two day long comprehensive/qualifying exams...

Even though the comps are more than a year away, I'm already incredibly anxious thinking about them. I picked up copies of some old comps from past years, and just looking at them induces hyperventilation.

I've had test anxiety for years. It never matter how well I prepared, I would choke, mis-read directions, misinterpret something, or even just plain forget the material. Like, my degree of test anxiety is standard deviations above the norm. It's severe enough that I have to take Ativan before any test, even the inconsequential General GRE.

I really need help. Tips, advice, something. The comps aren't tests I can afford to fail, you know? Getting my PhD in Physics has been my dream for years; I don't want to blow it.

 

[Geezer]

I forgot to mention this: I was speaking to a grad student who's currently in the same program. He told me that only HALF of the students taking the comps the past couple years the comps passed them. 50% failure rate does NOT help my test anxiety.

 

[micromass]

I wish I could say something useful, I really wish. You seem like an honest, intelligent, hard-working guy. And certainly somebody that deserves a PhD.

The problem with you is of course that you think too far ahead and that you're way to negative about the future. I can empathize with this, I have the same thing, just not with tests (luckily). The thing to do is just relax. It sounds way to easier said then done. But maybe there are a few things that could help you. You said you already were on medicines, does the Ativan help you? Do you still feel fearful when you've taken it?

Maybe see a psychiatrist and ask for stronger medicines?? Anxiety disorders are very efficiently solved with medicines. Maybe you should seek counceling and analyze your problems further? These things really work!

You could perhaps get diagnozed with an anxiety disorder and you could ask the university for special treatment?

I really wished I could post something containing the ultimate answer to your problem. But if you've been struggling with it for so long and didn't find an answer, then who am I to find an answer for you? Life is cruel teacher and I'm afraid you'll have to do it yourself

 

[Geezer]

You could perhaps get diagnozed with an anxiety disorder and you could ask the university for special treatment?

That's the last thing I want. I want to prove to my department and to myself that I deserve my PhD and that I can be competitive with the other students in the program. If I got extra time or other accommodations, that question of "Did Geezer pass the comps because he knew the material, or because he got a favorable advantage over the rest of us?" would always be there. Plus, too many people think test anxiety is a cop-out; I don't anyone to ever question whether or not I really deserve my PhD.

Re: Ativan. It keeps the physical manifestations of anxiety at bay: I can breathe normally, for example, so oxygen keeps flowing to my brain ('cause, as you can imagine, not getting adequate oxygen during an exam can lead to total failure).

 

[micromass]

That's the last thing I want. I want to prove to my department and to myself that I deserve my PhD and that I can be competitive with the other students in the program. If I got extra time or other accommodations, that question of "Did Geezer pass the comps because he knew the material, or because he got a favorable advantage over the rest of us?" would always be there. Plus, too many people think test anxiety is a cop-out; I don't anyone to ever question whether or not I really deserve my PhD.

I respect your point-of-view, but allow me to put it in a different light. The qualifier exams are there to see if everybody knows his stuff, that's the only reason that it exists. So if you could show that you know your stuff, then everything is alright. Of course, you could say that you were put at an advantage because of your accommodations. But the thing is that your anxiety already puts you at a disadvantage, and the accommodations are there to level the playing field.

The other students don't know what it is to have anxiety, so they have no right to judge you. Please, don't waste your chance at a PhD by depending too much on what other think of you. A PhD is something for yourself, the other students have nothing to do with YOUR PhD. If they're jealous, then they should develop anxiety to get thesame accommodations, see if they'd like that...

And third, somebody with a PhD always earned it himself. They done the research and they done the hard work, so they earned it. Whether they got accommodations in the quals is of no importance since in the end, it's the research that mattered. Do you think the work Einstein would be regared less because he got accommodations on one silly test??

Re: Ativan. It keeps the physical manifestations of anxiety at bay: I can breathe normally, for example, so oxygen keeps flowing to my brain ('cause, as you can imagine, not getting adequate oxygen during an exam can lead to total failure).

I see, seems like a good medicine. But maybe there are better/stronger ones?? I really suggest you find these things out. I'm a strong believer in medication, and I believe that medications can solve many problems and make lifes liveable again...