Dropped out of grad school for the third time today

Click For Summary

Discussion Overview

The discussion revolves around the experiences and feelings of a participant who has dropped out of graduate school for the third time, specifically in the field of electrical engineering. Participants share their reactions, offer advice, and reflect on the challenges of graduate studies, motivation, and career paths.

Discussion Character

  • Debate/contested
  • Conceptual clarification
  • Meta-discussion

Main Points Raised

  • The original poster expresses feelings of uncertainty and frustration after dropping out of grad school multiple times, citing reasons such as feeling overwhelmed and lacking motivation.
  • Some participants suggest that taking a break from school might be beneficial and that not everyone needs to pursue a PhD or research.
  • There are reflections on the importance of finding personal enjoyment in one's work and the possibility of exploring different fields, such as business, instead of continuing in a technical path.
  • Concerns are raised about the psychological impact of repeated failures in graduate school, including feelings of paranoia and the perception of being judged by others.
  • Some participants share personal anecdotes about their own experiences with graduate school and the challenges of motivation and expectations.
  • There is a discussion about the potential for returning to school after gaining industry experience, with some expressing skepticism about the motivation required for graduate studies.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Participants generally agree that taking a break from graduate school may be a wise choice, but there are differing opinions on whether the original poster should return to school in the future or explore other career options. The discussion remains unresolved regarding the best path forward for the original poster.

Contextual Notes

Participants mention various personal and psychological factors influencing their decisions about graduate school, highlighting the complexity of motivations and expectations in academic pursuits.

Physics_UG
Gold Member
Messages
287
Reaction score
2
Welp, I dropped out of grad school for the third (yes, third) time today. I wil be driving back home again and looking for a job.

This is the same grad school that I have dropped out of 3 times. The first time I was just sick of school. When I came back I got depressed and had to leave again. Th third time I came back (this time) my classes were over my head and I felt like I fell too far behind to catch up.

So I am back on the job market. I don't know whether to be relieved and glad or depressed. I think if I go back to school later on it will be part time while I am working. I have wasted 3 yrs of my life in grad school and I have nothing to show for it.

Edit: this is electrical engineering grad school btw.
 
Engineering news on Phys.org
That sucks.
 
indeed
 
That really sucks
 
I agree with Peng and Micro. That really does suck.
 
I don't mean to discourage you, but obviously three attempts at grad school and failing should mean that perhaps you need a break, and try something different. You know, not everybody needs to get a PhD or do research. You need to find what exactly you enjoy. It's ok NOT to enjoy doing research.

I advised someone in this site. He/she dropped out of grad school for his/her second time. I remember I said the same statements. You don't need to get a PhD. You don't need to do research... Don't force yourself into situations you just don't want. Try to take a break, and work for a few years and figure out what you want to do.
 
I don't know why I can't motivate myself to finish anything. I'm not (usually) lazy. I'm definitely not stupid.
 
Sounds like your heart's not in it. Is there another field you prefer?
 
Pyrrhus said:
I don't mean to discourage you, but obviously three attempts at grad school and failing should mean that perhaps you need a break, and try something different. You know, not everybody needs to get a PhD or do research. You need to find what exactly you enjoy. It's ok NOT to enjoy doing research.

the two times I came back my advisors told me to not worry about research and focus on my classes. Well, I couldn't seem to motivate myself to do anything. I think I have just realized that grad school isn't where I am meant to me.

Also, I am drunk.
 
  • #10
Physics_UG said:
Also, I am drunk.

Sigh. Get out.
 
  • #11
Evo said:
Sounds like your heart's not in it. Is there another field you prefer?

I would just like to find an electrical engineering job that I ENJOY doing. If I find it necessary I will go back to grad school to get an MBA or masters in EE part time. Part of the reason I came back to grad school or a third time was because I hated my job. It required pretty much no thinking at all.
 
  • #12
Pengwuino said:
Sigh. Get out.

second
 
  • #13
Pengwuino said:
Sigh. Get out.

lol. yeah.
 
  • #14
Physics_UG said:
the two times I came back my advisors told me to not worry about research and focus on my classes. Well, I couldn't seem to motivate myself to do anything. I think I have just realized that grad school isn't where I am meant to me.

Usually in the early days of your grad experience, Advisors ease students into research (which actually happens QUICKLY by your 1st summer or 2nd semester you're doing research). Motivation is important. I remember my advisor told me once he had a Brilliant student, but he dropped out with a Master, because he couldn't get himself into more years of being a grad student. Being a grad student is not pretty is you don't enjoy. You are at the bottom of everything, and everyone expects so much out of you. Thus, the ones that usually stay either have a high tolerance and/or passionate about what they do.
 
  • #15
Pyrrhus said:
Usually in the early days of your grad experience, Advisors ease students into research (which actually happens QUICKLY by your 1st summer or 2nd semester you're doing research). Motivation is important. I remember my advisor told me once he had a Brilliant student, but he dropped out with a Master, because he couldn't get himself into more years of being a grad student. Being a grad student is not pretty is you don't enjoy. You are at the bottom of everything, and everyone expects so much out of you. Thus, the ones that usually stay either have a high tolerance and/or passionate about what they do.

True. I think I lack a passion for the technical aspects of things. I think I would have been better off had I went into a business field like finance or accounting. Something mathematical but not so technical.
 
  • #16
Physics_UG said:
True. I think I lack a passion for the technical aspects of things. I think I would have been better off had I went into a business field like finance or accounting. Something mathematical but not so technical.

You can still do that if you want to, but I'd recommend stay away from school at least a few months, and to be certain that you want to go back for a MBA or MS EE.
 
  • #17
Pyrrhus said:
You can still do that if you want to, but I'd recommend stay away from school at least a few months, and to be certain that you want to go back for a MBA or MS EE.

The last two times I returned to grad school I was away from grad school for a year but I came back and failed.

Also, I didn't even finish with a masters. I just have (two) BS degrees. One in physics and one in EE.
 
  • #18
I am pretty sure that there are people who were away, working in the industry and came back to school for a Master's and got one.

Sounds like you don't have the motivation. If you don't have it, than don't go into grad school.

I don't know what you value in life, so I can't tell you what to do.

However if you're going to grad school because you don't know what you want, than stop and take a break. Ask yourself what you want and follow that desire.
 
  • #19
CheckMate said:
I am pretty sure that there are people who were away, working in the industry and came back to school for a Master's and got one.

Sounds like you don't have the motivation. If you don't have it, than don't go into grad school.

I don't know what you value in life, so I can't tell you what to do.

However if you're going to grad school because you don't know what you want, than stop and take a break. Ask yourself what you want and follow that desire.

Getting a PhD and becoming a professor has been what I've wanted since 2006. I just don;t have the motivation to follow through with it. I just quit giving a **** about everything after dropping out the first time.
 
  • #20
Honestly, the first itme I dropped out I had some psychological issues (paranoia, hearing voices, etc) that forced me to leave. I also felt like everyone eas talking about me behind my back (which I am still convinced to this day that they were.)
 
  • #21
Several points to consider

1) Don't return to your previous grad school if later you change your mind about doing a PhD. This might help with the paranoia sentiment that you think you're failure, and thus think everyone else thinks and talks about it which may or may not be true. Everyone is different and deals with sentiments like these in their own way, but if this is a problem to you another Grad school can help.

2) Sometimes we say we want to be an astronaut, a professor, a researcher, but then the reality sets in, and it's hard to confront our expectations. At first, you thought you'd enjoy an activity and once you actually do it, you realize you don't.

3) You need to take a break and do something else. There's no point in going back again for a fourth time, if you can't find any interest in it. Find a job. Work, and see what's going on. Try with a Master's part time while you're working, but don't push yourself if you see again you are not interested about it.
 
  • #22
Pyrrhus said:
Several points to consider

1) Don't return to your previous grad school if later you change your mind about doing a PhD. This might help with the paranoia sentiment that you think you're failure, and thus think everyone else thinks and talks about it which may or may not be true. Everyone is different and deals with sentiments like these in their own way, but if this is a problem to you another Grad school can help.

2) Sometimes we say we want to be an astronaut, a professor, a researcher, but then the reality sets in, and it's hard to confront our expectations. At first, you thought you'd enjoy an activity and once you actually do it, you realize you don't.

3) You need to take a break and do something else. There's no point in going back again for a fourth time, if you can't find any interest in it. Find a job. Work, and see what's going on. Try with a Master's part time while you're working, but don't push yourself if you see again you are not interested about it.

Thanks. I definitely on't be coming bac kto this hell hold ever again.
 
  • #23
Visit a therapist. Changing your mind about something isn't the end of the world as you know it.
 
  • #24
Willowz said:
Visit a therapist. Changing your mind about something isn't the end of the world as you know it.

I've seen therapists, I've seen psychiatrists, etc. Nothing seems to work for me.
 
  • #25
Well, at least don't give up. I don't want to psychologise the topic any more than I may have already done.
 
  • #26
First thing that came to mind when I read that title: "How do you drop out 3 times in one day?"

Perhaps a comma would help. :-p (Or, a little common sense on my part...)
 
  • #27
TylerH said:
First thing that came to mind when I read that title: "How do you drop out 3 times in one day?"

Perhaps a comma would help. :-p (Or, a little common sense on my part...)

:redface: Me too. I thought, oh man, I had lots of days like that when I was in college!
 
  • #28
lol, sorry about that. I am drunk.

I am going through a serious quarter life crisis right now.
 
  • #29
Physics_UG said:
lol, sorry about that. I am drunk.

I am going through a serious quarter life crisis right now.

Man, a psychosis by itself is normal, about a third or something of all people get one somewhere in their lives. But... If you suffered from psychosis at age twenty-five and you didn't have a severe burn-out for whatever reason I suggest you rethink everything and look how you can best have a decent but very quiet life.
 
  • #30
Whoa, he just got banned.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Similar threads

Other How to Afford Moving to Another State For Grad School?
  • · Replies 16 ·
Replies
16
Views
3K
Studying Any tips for getting GPA over 3.7 in grad school?
  • · Replies 9 ·
Replies
9
Views
4K
Admissions Graduating a year early anxieties + grad school
  • · Replies 15 ·
Replies
15
Views
1K
Other Physics PhD after working for few years
  • · Replies 12 ·
Replies
12
Views
3K
Other Should I go back to grad school for physics after 4.5 years?
  • · Replies 28 ·
Replies
28
Views
4K
Physics Is undergrad research REALLY that big on grad school applications?
  • · Replies 4 ·
Replies
4
Views
2K
Advice: Doing grad school abroad and getting a masters instead of PhD
  • · Replies 15 ·
Replies
15
Views
4K
Admissions Curious about my grad school prospects
  • · Replies 3 ·
Replies
3
Views
4K
Admissions Dropped out for 5 years -- What are my chances at Grad schools?
  • · Replies 3 ·
Replies
3
Views
2K
Preparing for Physics Grad School after Math/Comp Sci undergrad
  • · Replies 8 ·
Replies
8
Views
3K