Four ways Kangaroos can fix climate change.

[Topher925]

1. Kangaroos hop around to get to one place to another and do so extremely efficiently, more efficient than walking or running. Furthermore, kangaroos can hop up to 40mph and can do so for relatively long periods of time. By replacing motor vehicles with kangaroos, the efficiency of our transportation system will increase dramatically and greatly reduce CO2 emission.

2. Unlike cows, kangaroos don't fart. Cow farts generate large amounts of methane that are thought to contribute to climate change via the greenhouse gas effect. By replacing the beef in our food supply with kangaroo meat, the amount of cows in the world can be greatly reduced thereby limiting the amount of methane generated.

3. Kangaroos have a unique digestive system that makes them very efficient. They also have the ability to go weeks without water. By using kangaroos to spin large power turbines, base-load stationary power demands can be met using kangaroo kibble as fuel.

4. Since the world will eventually have a bunch of kangaroos for eating and spinning power turbines, there will be an overall abundance of kangaroo poo. Roo-poo is a very versatile material that be used as a replacement for concrete, which generates enormous amounts of CO2 when its made. Roo-poo can also be used to make paper and fabrics.

 

[Newai]

2. Unlike cows, kangaroos don't fart. Cow farts generate large amounts of methane that are thought to contribute to climate change via the greenhouse gas effect. By replacing the beef in our food supply with kangaroo meat, the amount of cows in the world can be greatly reduced thereby limiting the amount of methane generated.

I was skeptical so I looked this up and all I can say is wow.

Scientists to Make Cows Fart Like Kangaroos to Cool the Planet

We’re guessing that headline caught your attention! Cow farts are a source of greenhouse gases, while kangaroo farts are methane free thanks to a particular bacteria in their stomachs. Now, in a bizarre twist of science-reality, scientists from Australia are trying to neutralize cow-produced methane by transferring that kangaroo bacteria to cattle and sheep’s guts

http://inhabitat.com/scientists-to-make-cows-fart-like-kangaroos/

I know a few people who could benefit greatly from this.

 

[hypatia]

So I should invest in a kangaroo chariot company that makes them from recycled roo-poo?

 

[Evo]

1. Kangaroos hop around to get to one place to another and do so extremely efficiently, more efficient than walking or running. Furthermore, kangaroos can hop up to 40mph and can do so for relatively long periods of time. By replacing motor vehicles with kangaroos, the efficiency of our transportation system will increase dramatically and greatly reduce CO2 emission.

2. Unlike cows, kangaroos don't fart. Cow farts generate large amounts of methane that are thought to contribute to climate change via the greenhouse gas effect. By replacing the beef in our food supply with kangaroo meat, the amount of cows in the world can be greatly reduced thereby limiting the amount of methane generated.

3. Kangaroos have a unique digestive system that makes them very efficient. They also have the ability to go weeks without water. By using kangaroos to spin large power turbines, base-load stationary power demands can be met using kangaroo kibble as fuel.

4. Since the world will eventually have a bunch of kangaroos for eating and spinning power turbines, there will be an overall abundance of kangaroo poo. Roo-poo is a very versatile material that be used as a replacement for concrete, which generates enormous amounts of CO2 when its made. Roo-poo can also be used to make paper and fabrics.

 

[Pengwuino]

Sticky this thread.

 

[Borek]

Isn't posting about global warming against forum rules?

 

[Newai]

Isn't posting about global warming against forum rules?

Kangaroos make everything okay.

 

[nismaratwork]

Cows do fart, but it's their burping that's actually the issue.

On the downside... they're adorable and they hop... good luck selling that to the average consumer.

 

[lisab]

Kangaroos make everything okay.

I wonder what will happen to the kangaroos when the world ends in 2012!

 

[nismaratwork]

I wonder what will happen to the kangaroos when the world ends in 2012!

Like the dolphins, they'll leave, a la Douglas Adams' vision.

 

[mugaliens]

Ok, Topher, I'm convinced. Bring on the roos. :)

 

[nismaratwork]

I just watched a truly low-brow show called, "The Smoking Gun's: World's Dumbest...", and a red kangaroo STRANGLED a mascot suited fellow. Lucky for the guy that his head was lower than the head on the mascot, that roo was STRONG.

I see one practical issue however... kangaroos need to bound over long distances for their locomotion to be efficient. Now that's great in AU, but how about saaaay... Denmark? I find it hard to imagine a positive reaction to 'roos bounding up and down Copenhagen's cobbles.

 

[Topher925]

Ok, Topher, I'm convinced. Bring on the roos. :)

Embrace the new roo economy.

 

[Topher925]

I was skeptical so I looked this up and all I can say is wow.

You think I'm makin this stuff up? There's strong scientific evidence to support all four of these innroovations.

 

[Proton Soup]

how do i milk a kangaroo?

 

[DaveC426913]

2. Unlike cows, kangaroos don't fart. Cow farts generate large amounts of methane that are thought to contribute to climate change via the greenhouse gas effect.

Actually, only 5% of a cow's emission of methane is via farting. The other 95% is belching.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cattle#Environmental_impact
Perhaps kangaroos belch 100%. Who knows?

 

[DaveC426913]

I see one practical issue however... kangaroos need to bound over long distances for their locomotion to be efficient. Now that's great in AU, but how about saaaay... Denmark?

Big-*** hamster wheels.

 

[nismaratwork]

Big-*** hamster wheels.

Heh, you could generate some Watts that way too.

 

[qspeechc]

This also means we should eat wild-kangaroo meat and not beef.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

how do i milk a kangaroo?

Very carefully.

Reminds me of one of my favorite lines from a Biologist: Are you ready to masturbate that Rhino?

 

[nismaratwork]

Very carefully.

Reminds me of one of my favorite lines from a Biologist: Are you ready to masturbate that Rhino?

No... never... I might have to do it, but I'll never be "ready". That's the only sane response unless you just turn and run, which is also quite sane.

I'd add that as kangaroo is a marsupial, you'd need to be reaching INTO that pouch to do any milking.


You first.

 

[physics girl phd]

Whenever I see the title of this thread, I'm wondering if we can get all the kangaroos in Australia to jump in unison at the right time and shift Earth's orbit outward a bit.

 

[DaveC426913]

Whenever I see the title of this thread, I'm wondering if we can get all the kangaroos in Australia to jump in unison at the right time and shift Earth's orbit outward a bit.

Yeah but it would come right back again, so...

 

[nismaratwork]

Yeah but it would come right back again, so...

...Obviously the solution is for them to keep hopping.

 

[Dembadon]

Stellar thread, Topher!