Trenton, the problem is that you try to import ideas from Newtonian gravity directly into GR and it doesn't work, GR is a very different theory. For example:
Trenton said:
But it makes escape impossible for matter because no matter how fast it's initial upward velocity, it will have to climb against a force that matches it. In this sense and only in this sense, can it be said that the escape velocity is c - and then this would be hopelessly misleading.
There is no such thing as a gravitational "force" in general relativity! Gravitational effects are due to the fact that matter curves spacetime, and free-falling objects follow "geodesic" paths through this curved spacetime. Some intros to the basic concepts of GR, including curved spacetime and geodesics, can be found in
this thread.
Trenton said:
Saying the escape velocity is c is a nonsense in two ways. It suggest that if something could reach c (which would make it more massive by an infinite factor that the entire observable universe).
No, I've already told you it doesn't suggest that. In Newtonian physics it's true that an object falling in from infinity will have a velocity equal to the escape velocity when it hits the surface of a planet (or star or whatever), as seen in the inertial frame where the planet is at rest. But in GR escape velocity doesn't have this meaning! For one thing there is no possibility of an "inertial frame" in a large region of curved spacetime, you have an infinite variety of equally valid non-inertial frames and they all measure "velocity" differently (they also don't necessarily say that light itself has a constant velocity). As I explained to you, in a very small patch of spacetime you can have a "local inertial frame" where an object in free-fall is at rest, and where the laws of physics are like those of SR (including the idea that light moves at c), thanks to the
equivalence principle. But in any local inertial frame at the horizon, it will be the horizon itself that's moving outward at c, not the free-falling object.
Trenton said:
And it leads to the notion that light cannot escape (this would only be true if time stands still at Rs which I think is wrong)
There is no need for time to stand still at the horizon, you can pick coordinate systems where the time dilation experienced by clocks falling through the horizon is finite, and they cross the horizon at a finite coordinate time, like
Eddington-Finkelstein coordinates (if you're weirded out by coordinate systems where the horizon is moving outward, you may like this one better since it does have the horizon at a fixed radial coordinate). In these coordinates, the fact that light can't escape from a black hole is explained by the fact that the future
light cones of events closer to the horizon become increasingly tilted, until at the horizon the entire future light cone is inside or on the horizon, as illustrated in this diagram from the textbook
Gravitation:
[PLAIN]http://www.valdostamuseum.org/hamsmith/DFblackIn.gif
Trenton said:
The idea that time stops at Rs where the gravitational field is finite seems to me to be wrong.
Please note that the question of whether "time stops" has no coordinate-independent meaning, it simply depends on how you choose to define your coordinate system. As I mentioned earlier, one can define a coordinate system where "time stops" at any arbitrary boundary like the center of your room, in the sense that in this coordinate system the ratio of your clock time to coordinate time would approach zero as you approached the center, so the event of your crossing the boundary of the center would not be assigned any finite time-coordinate. Please read up on "diffeomorphism invariance" in
this article if you have trouble with the idea that non-inertial coordinate systems can be defined in absolutely any way we want them to.