I know, i feel a bit like that too. But it's really nice that people are so stoked to help out. I always liked the 'condition of space' idea, but at uni I never got to QFT, we did quantum mechanics, but QFT was part of the masters course. I've been listening to Susskind's lectures on the standard model, and it has rather re-sparked my interest in learning more physics, except now I don't have all the libraries and teachers I could want. Anyway, according to what I have learned so far, a particle IS a field quanta, but a friend of mine, who is much cleverer than I am, says that I'm wrong, and that a particle is DESCRIBED by field quanta. I think this is true too, as they are described in terms of quantised properties of fields like those mentioned above, but I'm now doubting my grasp of the lectures. I'm also concerned with the link between spacetime and fields, do fields exist 'within' spacetime, are they part of it? To top it off, one of my final projects at uni was about themodynamical properties of spacetime, as implied by aspects of black hole physics, which evidently deals with a sort of quantised spacetime, but it wasn't a really qft of spacetime, and I wonder if there is one...