Marry Our Daughter - Biblical Marriage Introduction Service

[Mallignamius]

I don't know if in the u.s it's the same. but in Canada the law makes no sense on this.

a 40 year old man can have sex with a 14 year old girl, and that's perfectly legal. But if he possessed naked pictures of a 14 year old girl, he'd go to jail for being a pedophile... so I guess he's allowed to have sex with young girls, just not take pictures, because THAT would make him a pervert

That's never made any sense to me either. A 40 year-old man and an 18 year-old girl is bad enough. In the case of marriage to a minor, I can only hope that the parents are awake and sufficiently incorruptible enough to close the door.

And those laws really need to be ripped up. There is no excuse or rationalization in today's America for a man to propose to a child. None.

 

[Moonbear]

It happens in India and needn't necessarily be immoral either. In many cases, individuals are quite happy to let their family/parents "pick" a match.

Or they are like my friend who simply got divorced and moved to the U.S. From her perspective, many are not happy, but just make do because they have little choice of it.

That site sounds too fishy to be true. Though, after reading the testimonials, that country song comes to mind..."Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?"

 

[CaptainBarbosa]

I sincerely hope to God that this is a hoax...

 

[siddharth]

I doubt that those particular people do not have a choice but to act happy?

Perhaps in some cases, but not in all. Arranged marriages are actually preferred by many people. For example, web based services like BharatMatrimony which help the family and individuals in picking "suitable" partners seem to be quite popular.

"Many cases" is kind of vague. A full half of arranged marriages have to turn out happy to match the success rate of picking your own husband or wife.

It's hard to find statistics on how successful a marriage is, partly due to the large population and partly because it's hard to measure.

My point is that, there's a different cultural system which exists, which places a strong emphasis on family interaction and status. It's quite common, especially in the rural areas, for a large extended family to live together. (Although this trend is changing in most cities). So, there seems to be a belief in such places that something as important as marriage is best left to the family members, who then try to pick a "compatible" partner for an individual, based on criteria which they believe are important. If both individuals agree to the match, then the arranged marriage takes place.

The family structure in India is usually patriarchal, and so women have to suffer most of the consequences when it goes wrong. Child marriages, forced marriages, the system of dowry, abuse and harassment by other family members, etc are some of the consequences when the system fails.

Or they are like my friend who simply got divorced and moved to the U.S. From her perspective, many are not happy, but just make do because they have little choice of it.

IMO, since the population is so large, there's always going to be many people who aren't happy as well as many people who are happy with their arranged marriage.

IMO, as long as people aren't forced and have the choice to enter and exit marriage, the arranged marriage system isn't necessarily immoral.

 

[Danger]

that country song comes to mind..."Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?"

Blasphemer! How dare you equate Joplin with cowboy ****?! That was hard-core rock. If memory serves, it was written by Kris Kristophersen; he definitely was not 'country'.

 

[qspeechc]

Is this stuff even legal? What about human rights, international laws and all that jazz. It's sad that there is actually a market for this. No matter how advanced we as humans think we are, there are still those backward ones like this. Yes, they are backwards.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

Blasphemer! How dare you equate Joplin with cowboy ****?! That was hard-core rock. If memory serves, it was written by Kris Kristophersen; he definitely was not 'country'.

I don't know. Wiki says otherwise, but you know wiki.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercedes_Benz_(song)

Kris Kristofferson was inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame in 2004
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inductees_of_the_Country_Music_Hall_of_Fame

 

[Astronuc]

Blasphemer! How dare you equate Joplin with cowboy ****?! That was hard-core rock. If memory serves, it was written by Kris Kristophersen; he definitely was not 'country'.

I think Kristofferson was more folk initially, but his compositions were picked up the country music artists.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kris_Kristofferson#Music_career

Kristofferson dated Joplin briefly. Mercedes Benz is attributed to Joplin and poet Michael McClure.

He had an interesting early life - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kris_Kristofferson#Early_life

Kristofferson ultimately joined the U.S. Army and achieved the rank of captain. He became a helicopter pilot after receiving flight training at Fort Rucker in southeastern Alabama. Later, during the early 1960s, he was stationed in West Germany and returned to music and formed a band. In 1965, he resigned his commission to pursue songwriting. He had just been assigned to become an English Literature professor at West Point.

 

[wildman]

Reminds me of a story a friend of mine told me after he returned from Iraq. They were driving trucks from Kuwait to Bagdad with a CO that happened to be an attractive female. Well at one stop, an Iraqi fellow spied their CO and asked my friend how much for the girl. Their unit was still laughing about it months later.

 

[turbo]

Kris has been covered by some of country's best.

"Well, I woke up Sunday morning with no way to hold my head that didn't hurt..."

 

[Moonbear]

Blasphemer! How dare you equate Joplin with cowboy ****?! That was hard-core rock. If memory serves, it was written by Kris Kristophersen; he definitely was not 'country'.

It was played on all the country stations.



You can't tell me that's not a country twang she's singing with there. Not a hint of "rock" to that song.

 

[Astronuc]

It was played on all the country stations.



You can't tell me that's not a country twang she's singing with there. Not a hint of "rock" to that song.

No. That's how they sing in Texas. Janis was from Port Arthur.

Besides, the Rock stations in Houston, particularly K101, played Janis. she under the genres of Psychedelic Rock, Acid Rock, Blues-rock, Hard Rock. She's more blues-rock than the others.

 

[Moonbear]

No. That's how they sing in Texas. Janis was from Port Arthur.

Besides, the Rock stations in Houston, particularly K101, played Janis. she under the genres of Psychedelic Rock, Acid Rock, Blues-rock, Hard Rock. She's more blues-rock than the others.

I know her other songs are all Rock, but until this thread, I didn't even realize she was the one singing Mercedes Benz. It was a totally different style from her other music.

 

[turbo]

"prove that you love me and buy the next round"

Priceless!

 

[Moonbear]

"prove that you love me and buy the next round"

Priceless!

Maybe we need to cross-reference this to the "What's going on" thread.

 

[turbo]

Maybe. Then again, maybe young people need to learn social skills on their own, so they're not stumbling around blind. In HS, I was short, lean, and slight of build (due to constant cross-country running and training for other sports). I learned then that if you liked a girl, you ought to treat her respectfully, try to have fun, and be a friend. Just be nice. In my freshman year of college, I was smitten by a very tall, leggy Scandinavian-looking blond, and noticed she sat alone at meals or perhaps with another girl or two from her dorm, so I mustered the courage to approach her table with my tray and ask if I could sit with her. She flashed a big smile and said "I've been saving this seat for you". We became inseparable, and you'd have to resort to Susan Anton/Dudley Moore to find an odder couple. I grew another 4" in the next year or so, but still she towered over me. We shared tastes in literature, music, philosophy, etc, and had a great time together.

It seems like a lot of the "what's going on" -type discussions are built around insecurities and fears. Young people have to realize (sooner or later) that romance/sex are secondary to friendships and that you cannot build a long-lasting relationship on the passions and infatuations that are so intriguing early-on. If you can't be a friend to your partner, you can't be a lover.

 

[Astronuc]

It seems like a lot of the "what's going on" -type discussions are built around insecurities and fears. Young people have to realize (sooner or later) that romance/sex are secondary to friendships and that you cannot build a long-lasting relationship on the passions and infatuations that are so intriguing early-on. If you can't be a friend to your partner, you can't be a lover.

Exactly! I always started with the idea of a friendship with any woman I met. If we found ourselves compatible in enough areas, the relationship might become more intimate. For me, the physical attraction was about the last thing, because I figured it happen eventually. I need the intellectual and emotional connection.

Start relationships as friends and just let it happen.

 

[turbo]

Exactly! I always started with the idea of a friendship with any woman I met. If we found ourselves compatible in enough areas, the relationship might become more intimate. For me, the physical attraction was about the last thing, because I figured it happen eventually. I need the intellectual and emotional connection.

Start relationships as friends and just let it happen.

Due to the age disparity, I know we were not separated at birth, but I know a kindred spirit when I see one.



BTW, for anybody keeping score, I'm the old guy - Astro's gray notwithstanding.

 

[Mk]

Funny how we have a bunch of people saying "arranged marriages, sick!" "young girls having sex sick!," and then we have a guy that is comparing without bias, multiple cultures and how in other cultures these issues are not necessarily firmly wrong. I got close to what I wanted to say but didn't quite— something about moral relativism, perspective, and how with held personal morals you are always right, and everybody who does not agree with you is wrong.

 

[Astronuc]

Due to the age disparity, I know we were not separated at birth, but I know a kindred spirit when I see one.



BTW, for anybody keeping score, I'm the old guy - Astro's gray notwithstanding.

I'm not far behind.

Funny how we have a bunch of people saying "arranged marriages, sick!" "young girls having sex sick!," and then we have a guy that is comparing without bias, multiple cultures and how in other cultures these issues are not necessarily firmly wrong. I got close to what I wanted to say but didn't quite— something about moral relativism, perspective, and how with held personal morals you are always right, and everybody who does not agree with you is wrong.

Arranged marriages are fine, IF they talk into consideration the rights, needs and wants of the individuals to be married, and if it is with the fully-informed (and not coerced) consent of those individuals.

In my case, there is NO way I would have let my parents arrange a marriage for me. While my father understands me to some degree, my mother certainly doesn't, and given her background and certain biases, she never could. Besides, I prefer to make my own decisions.

And reading some of the descriptions on that website - those young girls need to do a lot of growing up before they get married. And so do the men who are inclined to make proposals.

 

[turbo]

I'm not far behind.

6-7 years at least, youngster! I don't mind my age. I grew up in a time and place where none of us had much material stuff (compared to today), but I learned a lot about caring for livestock, basic carpentry, etc, and I worked full-time all my summers since I was about 15 or so. My parents grew up during the Great Depression, so I learned to waste nothing and make the most of what we had.

 

[Moonbear]

Funny how we have a bunch of people saying "arranged marriages, sick!" "young girls having sex sick!," and then we have a guy that is comparing without bias, multiple cultures and how in other cultures these issues are not necessarily firmly wrong. I got close to what I wanted to say but didn't quite— something about moral relativism, perspective, and how with held personal morals you are always right, and everybody who does not agree with you is wrong.

Okay, that site is worse than just an arranged marriage (my understanding, which may be wrong, is that most modern-day arranged marriages still take into account the preferences of each of the young people to be betrothed, and includes a lengthy period during which the families learn about each other and the two young people to determine if they will be well suited for each other, as a couple and as a family). That site is pretty much just selling the girls. Based on a rather superficial paragraph and a photo, someone is supposed to click on the "propose" button and cough up tens of thousands of dollars to buy their wife. Might as well be mail order brides.

 

[Danger]

I'm the old guy - Astro's gray notwithstanding.

Well, that was never in question. While your profile says that you're ploughing the ZPE field, you neglected to mention that you also planted it.

 

[turbo]

Zathras not plant ZPE field. That was Zathras. Zathras, not Zathras. See? Different.

 

[slugcountry]

oh god i miss B5

 

[kach22i]

How nice...

http://www.marryourdaughter.com/

I clicked the link to see if it was a joke, am I on an FBI data base now?

 

[turbo]

oh god i miss B5

Join Netflix for a couple of months, and you can get the whole series and their full-length specials. It's about 35 DVDs, IIR.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

Seems it was a hoax after all.
Newsweek

 

[Astronuc]

Yeah - "MarryOurDaughter.com has received 60 million hits since it launched last week—and, believe it or not, on top of angry letters, thousands of proposals."


On page 2 -

Real or not real, the blogs are buzzing about MarryOurDaughter.com, and everybody seems to have the same question: if it is a hoax, why bother? The care put into the site is clear—it's smart, witty and well-designed. As it turns out, Ordover’s intentions go deeper than poking fun. He says he was hired by a group of women from a local support group who'd been married out in similar fashions—and wanted to draw attention to a very real problem. Marriage laws vary by state in the U.S. and are often in conflict with statutory-rape laws, he says—meaning that, with parental permission, it's not uncommon to find girls as young as 13 married with children in states where the legal age of sexual consent is more like 17.

This last bit is INSANE! What parents would do such a thing?!

 

[Mallignamius]

Utah, which allows marriages with parental consent at age 14, also allows a person to marry without consent if he or she has been previously married.

Outdated is an understatement.

Here's my concern. Since so many people took this seriously, how long before someone creates a serious version? How long before lawmakers get around to straightening this out?

But what about a real site? Mail-order-bride sites are legal under international law, as long as the bride is of age, says Andrea Bertone, the director of HumanTrafficking.org. And depending on state laws, requiring a specific dowry for an underage girl—with parental approval—would appear to be just fine. But at some point, dowry crosses over to bride price crosses over into selling—which crosses over into trafficking. “It's complicated, because child marriage is quite common around the world," says Bertone, whose research center is based at the Academy for Educational Development in Washington. “It might be interpreted under the U.N. Trafficking Protocol to be illegal (although there is nothing in the U.N. Trafficking Protocol or the U.N. Convention on the Rights of the Child that mentions anything about marriage or brides), but there is little that can be done if countries do not outlaw it and then enforce their own laws.”