Moving: Pros & Cons of My Dream Place

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The discussion centers around a person facing the difficult decision to move from a beloved one-bedroom apartment to accommodate their daughter, who wants to move in to save on commuting costs. The current living situation is cherished for its natural surroundings, including a ravine and wildlife, which will be lost in the move. Two potential two-bedroom apartments are being considered, each with distinct pros and cons, including concerns about safety and parking. The financial implications of the move are significant, as the new rent will increase expenses, despite the daughter’s intention to help with costs and household chores. There is skepticism about the daughter's commitment to contributing and the long-term viability of the living arrangement, especially with her boyfriend involved. The conversation also touches on broader themes of financial responsibility and the impact of the current economic climate on family dynamics. Ultimately, the need for a larger space is pressing, but the emotional attachment to the current home complicates the decision.
  • #61


rewebster said:
you got to find some guy to shack up with soon,evo, esp. if her boyfriend is moving in too. Men need that 'alone time' with their woman...


how soon do YOU have to move from your place now?
Eh, no one wants me, I'm fine with that.

I'm going to keep my place for a few weeks so I can move out slowly.
 
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  • #62


oh, evo, probably every guy wants you--I don't think that's the problem

good--at least you're not going to be rushed to pack
 
  • #63


Dang, it's going to be tough to move with all that snow on the ground :frown:...I hope you'll have lots of help!
 
  • #64


lisab said:
Dang, it's going to be tough to move with all that snow on the ground :frown:...I hope you'll have lots of help!
Just the hired help. :frown:
 
  • #65


hasn't there been (more than) a few sit coms with a couple and a parent living with them?

1) King of Queens
2)

I got to start thinking about a theme song for you and 'the kids'

hey, your daughter and her bf will be there to help you to pack and move
 
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  • #66


zomgwtf said:
Evo what kind of things are you into :eek:
Power tools, dangerous hand-tools, life-threatening situations in general. You know...
 
  • #67


Evo said:
I'm nutty enough for a flock of squirrels. What do you call a bunch of squirrels?
A Mafia.
 
  • #68


Evo said:
Eh, no one wants me, I'm fine with that.

I'm going to keep my place for a few weeks so I can move out slowly.
Durn! I'm currently engaged (35 years next month) or I'd offer you a place to store your kit. Only 'cause you're nice, though. I ain't convinced you can hoe a row of corn or bake a pot o' beans. Just sayin'
 
  • #69


there's always chipmunks
 
  • #70


Proton Soup said:
there's always chipmunks
Here's one of my 'munks climbing me to see if I have seeds for her. Sweeties!

munkonleg.jpg
 
  • #71


If a chimpmunk ever got close enough to me to climb up my leg I would try to stomp on it for sure. I like nature and animals and all but squirels and the like I'd rather have my distance from.
 
  • #72


zomgwtf said:
If a chimpmunk ever got close enough to me to climb up my leg I would try to stomp on it for sure. I like nature and animals and all but squirels and the like I'd rather have my distance from.
'Munks are sweeties. They are the cuddliest wild critters ever, and they will steal your heart if you ever get to know them. They will act all excited when they see you and dash to you as quickly as they can. They are not vocal, but they are very demonstrative.

BTW, I shoot red squirrels on sight.
 
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  • #73


turbo-1 said:
'Munks are sweeties. They are the cuddliest wild critters ever, and they will steal your heart if you ever get to know them. They will act all excited when they see you and dash to you as quickly as they can to you. They are not vocal, but they are very demonstrative.

They sing a great christmas carol too.
 
  • #74


Evo said:
Just the hired help. :frown:

You have said something about Evo Child and her BF? Let him know what it means to live with you-want-me-as-a-mother-in-law - the sooner the better.

Jokes aside: they really should be involved in moving. After all you sacrifice place you like to help them.
 
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  • #75


I was wondering (unless I missed it) why you are moving in with them. Wouldn't be better, in a lot of ways, just to help them a little with the rent (does your ex help at all?) ?
 
  • #76


Hmm...if a place you like better becomes available Feb 6 and your daughter needs to be out of her place sooner, is that really sufficient reason to hastily move to a place that isn't as desireable? You're already sacrificing a lot to help her financially, and Feb. 6 is not that far away. Surely she and her bf could camp out on sofas or an inflatable mattress on the floor for a couple weeks until the better apartment is ready. They're still plenty young enough to manage that for a short time in the interest of finding a place you'll enjoy more in the long term. Afterall, they could decide to move back out in 6 months and you're stuck there...it should be a place you enjoy. Really, it's not that implausible that an adult child and her boyfriend living with her mom is not going to work well as a long-term living arrangement, no matter how good of a relationship the two of you have (how long will the bf be able to stand it for?).
 
  • #77


Moonbear said:
Hmm...if a place you like better becomes available Feb 6 and your daughter needs to be out of her place sooner, is that really sufficient reason to hastily move to a place that isn't as desireable? You're already sacrificing a lot to help her financially, and Feb. 6 is not that far away. Surely she and her bf could camp out on sofas or an inflatable mattress on the floor for a couple weeks until the better apartment is ready. They're still plenty young enough to manage that for a short time in the interest of finding a place you'll enjoy more in the long term. Afterall, they could decide to move back out in 6 months and you're stuck there...it should be a place you enjoy. Really, it's not that implausible that an adult child and her boyfriend living with her mom is not going to work well as a long-term living arrangement, no matter how good of a relationship the two of you have (how long will the bf be able to stand it for?).

good thinking, MB
 
  • #78


Moonbear said:
Hmm...if a place you like better becomes available Feb 6 and your daughter needs to be out of her place sooner, is that really sufficient reason to hastily move to a place that isn't as desireable? You're already sacrificing a lot to help her financially, and Feb. 6 is not that far away. Surely she and her bf could camp out on sofas or an inflatable mattress on the floor for a couple weeks until the better apartment is ready. They're still plenty young enough to manage that for a short time in the interest of finding a place you'll enjoy more in the long term. Afterall, they could decide to move back out in 6 months and you're stuck there...it should be a place you enjoy. Really, it's not that implausible that an adult child and her boyfriend living with her mom is not going to work well as a long-term living arrangement, no matter how good of a relationship the two of you have (how long will the bf be able to stand it for?).
Evo Child made a convincing case. She said the other apt faces an open field and the trees are pretty far away and we could see no squirrel nests, she said I'd probably just attract field mice. The apt that's available now is about a block from the ravine and the squirrels will have a clear view of my patio. If I put up a bird feeder, they will see the activity and will be at my patio like white on rice. :biggrin: I guess it is pretty pathetic that my main activity is watching rodents scurrying around. :rolleyes:
 
  • #79


Aren't you old (:rolleyes:) enough to start thinking about the place you want to live after retiring? :biggrin:
 
  • #80


Evo said:
Evo Child made a convincing case.

Hardly suprising:

Evo said:
But you cannot say no to her. She is so logical and so persuasive. And then she has those huge robin's egg blue almond shaped eyes with thick, long lashes, and that face she makes. Her friends all tell me it's not fair. They can't say no to her when she makes "the face".
 
  • #81


rewebster said:
I was wondering (unless I missed it) why you are moving in with them. Wouldn't be better, in a lot of ways, just to help them a little with the rent (does your ex help at all?) ?
Their utilities aren't included in their rent, they have to pay water, trash, cable, internet and electricity. Except for internet and electricity, everything else is included in my rent for a flat fee, $10 a month covers water and trash, for example, I just paid a $230 for her water bill, that was a 2 month bill. With all of her utilities, she pays more per month for her place than I pay for mine. So having them move in with me, even though it's a larger place, will save about $600 a month, and I won't have to help them out anymore, they can easily pay me the difference in the rent. Plus her boyfriend is a neat freak, so he loves to clean, he'll be doing a lot of the housework, which is fine with me.
 
  • #82


Borek said:
Hardly suprising:
She wants to be a lawyer, perfect choice. :-p
 
  • #83


Evo said:
Evo Child made a convincing case. She said the other apt faces an open field and the trees are pretty far away and we could see no squirrel nests, she said I'd probably just attract field mice. The apt that's available now is about a block from the ravine and the squirrels will have a clear view of my patio. If I put up a bird feeder, they will see the activity and will be at my patio like white on rice. :biggrin: I guess it is pretty pathetic that my main activity is watching rodents scurrying around. :rolleyes:

Hmm...with that information, I would agree with her. A block from the ravine sounds like a MUCH better location for you. :biggrin:

I hope she and her boyfriend round up every friend they have to help you move. Last time you moved, you broke too many things trying to do it yourself...mostly your bones! :eek: Since you're moving within the same apartment complex, it should be quick work if they round up a bunch of people to just pick up stuff and carry it and immediately put it away in a similar place to where it came from so you don't have to pack and unpack.
 
  • #84


Evo said:
Plus her boyfriend is a neat freak, so he loves to clean, he'll be doing a lot of the housework, which is fine with me.

Hmmm...I have a spare bedroom. :rolleyes:

Edit: Wait a minute! Which of them is running up a $230 water bill for just two months?! I can't remember ever having more than a $50 water bill QUARTERLY, even when watering the lawn and garden in the summer! How does someone run up that much of a bill living in an apartment?
 
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  • #85


Evo said:
... and I won't have to help them out anymore, they can easily pay me the difference in the rent.

well, that's the (your) plan...

:wink:

-------------------------------------------------

Everytime I've ever made the move to co-habitate, for some reason, no money was 'saved'---more was spent than before, with all the new activities
 
  • #86


When I was in college, I was a Spartan. Minimal furnishings, shelves made of cinderblock and boards, or perhaps milk-crates and boards, and the place was spotless. I can clutter up the place with stuff now, but I'm still a fan of "clean".

There were two young ladies who lived across the street from me in college, and they would rave about my apartment. I'd cook for them and they'd bring wine and appetizers. I had an older friend in Bangor who was gay (flamboyantly so!) and he kept his apartment perfectly clean, also. We all got along. I loved attending Tommy's parties - he and his buddies were geniuses at laying out opulent spreads for parties on a shoestring budget. I'd bring some top-shelf liquor as gifts to replenish what they would lay out, but there was no way to properly compensate him or his friends for all the other treats.
 
  • #87


Moonbear said:
Hmmm...I have a spare bedroom. :rolleyes:

Edit: Wait a minute! Which of them is running up a $230 water bill for just two months?! I can't remember ever having more than a $50 water bill QUARTERLY, even when watering the lawn and garden in the summer! How does someone run up that much of a bill living in an apartment?
I know, I was shocked when I saw what her bills run. They're not home that much and they eat out most of the time, so very few dishes. When I was at her place around Christmas, there were no leaky faucets, the toilet shut off properly. I'm wondering how accurate those water readings are. I may ask her for more copies of bills. I wonder if there could be a leak between her apartment and the water main, or a faulty meter.
 
  • #88


Evo said:
I know, I was shocked when I saw what her bills run. They're not home that much and they eat out most of the time, so very few dishes. When I was at her place around Christmas, there were no leaky faucets, the toilet shut off properly. I'm wondering how accurate those water readings are. I may ask her for more copies of bills. I wonder if there could be a leak between her apartment and the water main, or a faulty meter.

Is she the daughter that left a lot of stuff including that almost new vacuum behind when she moved one time?


I got a funny feeling that the daughter and her BF will be saving some of their money on rent and utilities at least.
 
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  • #89


Evo said:
I know, I was shocked when I saw what her bills run. They're not home that much and they eat out most of the time, so very few dishes. When I was at her place around Christmas, there were no leaky faucets, the toilet shut off properly. I'm wondering how accurate those water readings are. I may ask her for more copies of bills. I wonder if there could be a leak between her apartment and the water main, or a faulty meter.

I would very much suspect a leak somewhere. That's easy to test. Turn all the water off in the place, check the meter, go do something for a couple hours, check the meter again and see if it has changed. Unless she and her boyfriend are each taking 2 hour showers every day, it makes no sense otherwise.
 
  • #90


Moonbear said:
I would very much suspect a leak somewhere. That's easy to test. Turn all the water off in the place, check the meter, go do something for a couple hours, check the meter again and see if it has changed. Unless she and her boyfriend are each taking 2 hour showers every day, it makes no sense otherwise.

That was happening a lot at that period of my life--not 'each' though
 

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