New Orbital Sander: Read the Instructions First

[Ivan Seeking]

I once had a chineese fortune cookie fortune read "you like chineese food." Strangely enough, it was just about the worst chineese food I had ever eaten.

I got one that read: "Help! I'm being held captive in a Chinese cookie factory"

 

[matthyaouw]

While we're on humorous ironing stories... Did you ever see how Joon made grilled cheese sandwhiches in the movie, Benny and Joon?

Was it anything like this?

"Breakfast: fortified with iron"

 

[scott1]

I once had a Chinese fortune cookie fortune read "you like Chinese food." Strangely enough, it was just about the worst Chinese food I had ever eaten.

I got one that read: "Help! I'm being held captive in a Chinese cookie factory"

I once got a fountrne cookie that had fine print on it that said "Note: this "fountrne" is only for entrainment and that it is highly unlikely that any of thing that is written will happen on this fountrne cookie of future predictions is simply for entrainment and the makers of this fountrne cookie or this restaurant is not responsible for any damages or predictions that doesn't come true"

 

[rocketboy]

I know flour will explode, but will wood dust really do the same?

really? flour will explode?... do you just light it on fire? Oh, and how explosive is it?

 

[zoobyshoe]

really? flour will explode?... do you just light it on fire? Oh, and how explosive is it?

It is an explosion hazard only if there's a cloud of it in the air. A pile of flour won't explode. This is true of a lot of grain dust, but I don't know the physics of it. It's very explosive, at any rate, and they take great pains to prevent any kind of sparks from occurring in grain silos.

Apparently, from the warning on Ivan's sander, this is also true of common dust: the implication of the warning is that you shouldn't, say, fill the air with dust in an old building by sweeping, and then turn your sander on, since a spark from the brushes might ignite the dust and cause an explosion.

 

[fourier jr]

http://img376.imageshack.us/img376/2870/emergencyphone7ve.jpg

http://img376.imageshack.us/img376/9076/solarpoweredflashlight6uh.jpg

 

[fourier jr]

literally just saw this one

http://www.boners.com/content/795153.1.jpg

 

[JamesU]

Here's some from snopes:

Do not use while sleeping.
Sears hair dryer
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
Bag of Fritos

Use like regular soap.
Dial soap

Serving suggestion: Defrost.
Swann frozen dinner

Fits one head.
Shower cap box

Do not turn upside down.
Bottom of Tesco's Tiramisu dessert box

Product will be hot after heating.
Marks & Spencer bread pudding

Do not iron clothes on body.
Rowenta iron

Do not drive car or operate machinery.
Boot's children's cough medicine

Warning: May cause drowsiness.
Nytol


Warning: Keep out of children.
Korean kitchen knife
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Chinese Christmas lights

Not to be used for the other use.
Japanese food processor

Warning: Contains nuts
Sainsbury's peanuts

Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.
American Airlines peanut packet

Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
Swedish chainsaw

 

[tribdog]

Raid insecticide:
Deliberatly concentrating and inhaling contents may be hazardous to your health.