# Programming Jokes

Let's keep this out of the jokes thread. [...]
Oh, I dunno. Anyone who says (seriously) "that's a dumb question" deserves to be mentioned in a jokes thread.

BillTre, Tom.G and DaveC426913
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Anyone who says (seriously) "that's a dumb question" deserves to be mentioned in a jokes thread.

Many jokes are a stupid answer.

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BillTre
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When I first saw plumbing like this in a professionally installed water system for a zebrafish facility, I know I could do better with a home made system. Those companies are better now.

Klystron
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Actually not too different than the first computer I programmed.

And yes, BTW, this was the entire system. WYSIWYG.

Wrichik Basu, Borg, Ibix and 2 others
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Filip Larsen, jack action and DaveE
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Can you show us the handshaking protocols?

Wrichik Basu
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Can you show us the handshaking protocols?

At 1.08 (can't seem to get link to start at specified time on my phone, sorry).

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Ibix and berkeman
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Al-Layth and Ibix
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DaveC426913
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Sidenote: I started with QBASIC in school for three years, then moved on to Java (using BlueJ) for the next four years. For the last two years, I shifted to NetBeans at home, and that was a great boost to knowledge as I could quickly view documentation for every function and class. I think it is a good idea to start with languages like Java, where blocks are delimited by braces, rather than languages where an extra space can screw up your whole code, unless you are using an IDE.

Mentor
No Pascal?

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No Pascal?
He was under time pressure.

(Sorry, I know that's a physics joke.)

Not anonymous, berkeman, Wrichik Basu and 1 other person
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He was under time pressure.

(Sorry, I know that's a physics joke.)
Lame jokes need no further categorizing

Ibix
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No Pascal?
No, I didn't learn Pascal. BASIC → Java. Thereafter, MATLAB + Python (latter in college, primarily for numerical computation in physics). Side by side Android, MySQL, and some basics in C for Arduino.

Mentor
No, I didn't learn Pascal. BASIC → Java. Thereafter, MATLAB + Python (latter in college, primarily for numerical computation in physics). Side by side Android, MySQL, and some basics in C for Arduino.
I wasn't talking about you (why would you have learned Pascal?), but referencing the chart you posted. BASIC was my first language, but I would think that many of those who learned programming in the 1970's and 1980's would have started with Pascal.

Wrichik Basu and berkeman
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I wasn't talking about you (why would you have learned Pascal?), but referencing the chart you posted.
Can we do write-in options?

Pascal - thought it was Wirth it.

Not anonymous and DaveE
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No Pascal?
He was under time pressure.
Coincidentally, we have a new member who joined today, @Pascal pressure

Wrichik Basu
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what's funny about it was that Pascal was to be learning language, but so many people came out that Pascal morphed into one of the programming languages with which to write a serious program.

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I wasn't talking about you (why would you have learned Pascal?), but referencing the chart you posted. BASIC was my first language, but I would think that many of those who learned programming in the 1970's and 1980's would have started with Pascal.
IBM came out with a Basic interpreter as part of its software package along with DOS if you bought an IBM PC.
Apple came out with Basic.

A lot of home learners acquired Basic as the language of choice by default.

Wrichik Basu
Homework Helper
Can you show us the handshaking protocols?
The IP layer involves an unreliable datagram delivery service rather than a reliable connection oriented delivery service such as TCP. As such, handshaking is not necessary.

See RFC 1149 for IP over Avian Carriers, RFC 2549 for IP over Avian Carriers with QoS and RFC 6214 for the IPv6 update.

See RFC 791 for the Internet Protocol.

Of some interest is the scheme for weighted fair queuing and the danger of excessive logging.

From https://www.rfc-editor.org/rfc/rfc2549:
Code:
Weighted fair queueing (WFQ) MAY be implemented using scales, as
shown:

__
_____/-----\   / o\
<____   _____\_/    >--
+-----+              \ /    /______/
| 10g |               /|:||/
+-----+              /____/|
| 10g |                    |
+-----+          ..        X
===============================
^
|
=========

Carriers in the queue too long may leave log entries, as shown on the
scale.

Filip Larsen
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Jarvis323
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DaveC426913
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DrClaude
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Ibix
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Not anonymous, collinsmark and DrClaude