HansH said:
regarding #54-59: I think the problem for me is to exactly understand what is meant by the the concept of something being invariant. therefore I am lost at #56 2) already for example. That could probably also explain why I do not understand why pythagoras does not hold in 4d spacetime. so the question is if I read the proposed textbooks of pdf's don't I then run into the same problem? and if so how to solve?
In my experience most people who try to learn SR haven't studied enough basic physics. Sometimes even concepts like motion, velocity and acceleration are poorly understood. More usually, it is the concept of a
reference frame and
invariance that are a stumbling block. IMO, these should be studied in classical (Newtonian) physics first before tackling SR. Often, in fact, it's not SR that is the problem, but the concept of studying a kinematic problem from two different reference frames.
Classical physics (more or less) shares the postulate with SR that the laws of physics are the same in every inertial reference frame. If you look at Einstein's original 1905 paper, he actually says "consider a frame where the laws of Newtonian mechanics hold good"!
This is what allows us to do physics on Earth (playing a game of tennis, for example), without having to take into account the motion of the Earth, Sun and Milky Way relative to the fixed stars. Of course, the Earth's surface is not quite an inertial reference frame, hence Foucault's pendulum and large-scale weather systems - and it has gravity - but it's close enough in practical terms in many cases.
In classical physics, lengths and time intervals are invariant. Note that distances, speeds, momentum and kinetic energy are not. In any case, being able to transform a problem from one reference frame to another is a useful ability. E.g. studying a collision of two particles from either the laboratory frame (where one particle may be stationary); or, the centre of momentum frame, where the two particles have equal and opposite momenta is an extremely useful technique.
Once you get to SR, lengths and time intervals are no longer invariant, but the speed of light and spacetime intervals are. It's not, IMO, a question of where a minus sign comes from, but a larger conceptual step to move from the context of classical, Newtonian (Galilean) relativity to Einstein's Special Relavity. The step to General Relativity is a much greater one.
Even to learn the basics of classical physics requires time, focus and effort.