TurtleMeister said:
Are you assuming that the man releases the cart after pushing it? How do you get 9N? Shouldn't it be 10N for the cart and -10N for the man/earth?
There was a mistake in my previous post. It said the entire system accelerates at 10N/total mass, and that should have been 9N/total mass.
In my original scenario, the man and cart would go opposite directions. Then man would be pushed slightly backwards while the cart went forwards. I was not trying to indicate that the man stays with the cart. The center of mass is still well-defined, even for objects separated by a large distance. Eventually, once the cart got more than arm's length away, the man wouldn't be able to push on it any more. Then the accelerations would have to change, or the man would need to start pushing with a pole.
The man can push on the cart with however much force he likes, and can push on the Earth with however much force he likes. If we imagine a different scenario in which the man is going accelerate the same way as the cart, keeping his distance from the cart fixed, then he'll need to push on the ground harder than he pushes on the cart. Specifically, if the man and cart are going to accelerate at rate a, then the man needs to push on the ground with force F_{ground} = a*(m_{man} + m_{cart}) and push on the cart with force F_{cart} = a*m_{cart}.
Then the cart has one force on it, which is just a*m_{cart}, so it accelerates forwards at rate a. The man has two forces on him. A forward force from the ground (which is the reaction to him pushing against the ground) whose magnitude is a*(m_{man} + m_{cart}), and a backward force that is the reaction force from him pushing on the cart with magnitude a*m_{cart}. Subtracting these because they push in opposite directions, the total force on the man is a*m_{man} in the forward direction, so the man also accelerates forward at acceleration a.
For a concrete example, suppose the cart's mass is half as much as the man's. Then the man can push on the cart with 10N and push on the ground the opposite direction with 30 N. The total force on the cart will be 10N, and the total force on the man will be 30N - 10N = 20N. There is twice as much net force on the man, but since his mass is twice as much, the man and cart have the same acceleration.