Ask a Stupid Quetion Get a Stupid Answer

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally quiried by an imitation of the replicant that is the xerox of the duplicantion of the copy, zoo/by/shoe(s)
Once when I was performing the Rachmaninov second in front of an audience of about 400 people I suddenly became sensible of the most tremendously urgent need to shout the words "So's you muddah!" at a very high volume. My neurologist tested me for tourettes but declared me free of this condition. What causes this and how do you deal with it when you are performing the Rachmaninov Second?

It arises from a little know fact that, in the 'true' Russian of the name, it is actually representational of "Rack Man In OV", codewording for the pronunciation of the Overture is the symbolically representational presentation of the elements "O" and "V", hence, we find that due to the torrodial corrlelations of the stung out stringsets vibrational variance, in triplet, (no less) results in a harmonic inducement of "fortissimo expresso" dabbed in a lightly battered seasoning sauce of lemon and herbs, that eructs forcefully past the vocal cords in an inharmonious bellicousing verbalization of "So' you muddah!", all having been traced back to one "Porky Pig" (Snoutius Piglettensus repeti'ti'ti'ti'vus) and his insistance of his having acquired his "stutter" from his "mudder".

Humm woke up in that field again, but this time it was both sunny and cold, how the heck did that happen?

P.S. Zoob, thank$!

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons Humm woke up in that field again, but this time it was both sunny and cold, how the heck did that happen?

Coming too in a sunny, cold field
usually indicates you've been
indoctrinated into a new religion
such as K-Mart Red Light Worship
or possibly The Sanctfied Church
Of The Little Red Engine That
Could, or it could have been those
mustachioed pirates who call them-
selves "The Elder Brethren Of
Torpor And Hebetude In Waiting For
The Coming Age Of The Man With The
Slender Small Toe And His Cohort,
Miss Sally O'Malley.

P.S. Zoob, thank$!

What did I do now while I wasn't
paying attention?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
What did I do now while I wasn't
paying attention?

On Behalf of D'a Brudders Tank$s a mililllililllion for Da Saleing of De farm to Ust!

Why?? Oh Why did zobyshoe sell out the Family Farm? (Moan )

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Why?? Oh Why did zobyshoe sell out the Family Farm? (Moan )

"Zobyshoe"? This must be something
that happened in a perpendicular
realm where such people as "Mr.
Robin Persons" and "Fz-" dwell.

How many perpendicular versions
of Mr. Robin Persons can exist
in the same universe at the same time?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
How many perpendicular versions
of Mr. Robin Persons can exist
in the same universe at the same time?

UNCOUNTABLE! sadly, aren't you happy I'm the only one in this one, he-heeeeeeewheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

What is the square root of the exponent, squared to the logarithm of 42?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
UNCOUNTABLE! sadly, aren't you happy I'm the only one in this one, he-heeeeeeewheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

You may have more perpendicular
alter egos in this universe than
you realize.

What is the square root of the exponent, squared to the logarithm of 42?

The only answer I'm permitted to
give to that question, by reason
of my prior affiliations with the
non-denominational Board of Direc-
tors Of The Foundation For The
Advancement of The Study Of Found-
ational Advancement Studies, is:
"Tuesday".

Please Help! Homework problem:
Joe is a bartender. On weekdays
he works at bar X. Everyday a
rigid body of length L enters the
bar and gets a drink.
On weekends Joe works at a dif-
ferent bar, Bar Y. Every day a
rigid body of length L enters this
bar and gets a drink.
The rigid body in bar X has three
points marked along its length
which are designated M, R, and P.
The rigid body in Bar Y has three
points marked along its length
which are designated M, R, and S.
Joe can see no difference between
the two rigid bodies other than
the one difference in the desig-
nations. He wonders if they are
the same rigid body clumsily
pretending to be two different
rigid bodies.

How does Joe find out if they are
separate rigid bodies, or the
same one?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

You may have more perpendicular
alter egos in this universe than
you realize.

WOW he's on to us. No hes's Not, shutup you idiot or he'll figure it out. you shutup, and stop telling me to shutup, will ya!

Originally asked by zoobyshoe
Please Help! Homework problem: Joe is a bartender. On weekdays he works at bar X. Everyday a rigid body of length L enters the bar and gets a drink. On weekends Joe works at a different bar, Bar Y. Every day a
rigid body of length L enters this bar and gets a drink. The rigid body in bar X has three points marked along its length which are designated M, R, and P. The rigid body in Bar Y has three points marked along its length which are designated M, R, and S. Joe can see no difference between the two rigid bodies other than the one difference in the designations. He wonders if they are the same rigid body clumsily
pretending to be two different rigid bodies.
How does Joe find out if they are
separate rigid bodies, or the
same one?

(X^L/MRS⁷)/Y^MRP₄₂ then split them into two (2) different lines of force, halve the sections into several pieces, BB'Q the remnants of the secondary sections, that were extraneous to begin with, re-amalgamate the leftovers into a delicious wholesome and nutricious snack for later Ooops (that's the recipe) I meant re-amalgamate the remnants into sections that are divisible by Pi, then you will be able to tell if the sum of the parts are greater then, (>) less then, (<) or equal then (=) to the original, hence Knowledge of exactly where the treasure was reburied, Ooops I mean you will now know just who it is that bodifies "Bod rigididus" X/Y

P.S. Don't forget to tell Joe, he claims (It's a FALSE claim!) he has an outstanding Bill, why he placed Bill outside I'll never know. (hope Bill had a raincoat for that huricane)

Once you have CONCLUSIVE evidence of zoobyshoes, real identity, what will you do with it?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Once you have CONCLUSIVE evidence of zoobyshoes, real identity, what will you do with it?

Report to the Royal Cryptozoolog-
ical society for your medal.
(Don't get exited: it's just
anodized aluminum)

In the event this were an actual
emergency should you first...?

A.Batten down the hatches
B.Save women and children first
C.Sniff glue
D.Glue women to the children
E.Glue women and children to the
hatches
D.Sniff glue
F.Gluey glue
G.Glue glue to glue
H.Goo goo ga goo
I.0000000000000
J.
K
K
K

 

[BoulderHead]

Answer: Make women and children sniff zoobieglue.


Question: What is zoobieglue most commonly used for?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by BoulderHead
Question: What is zoobieglue most commonly used for?

It's used in place of gluons in
element 126: Zoobinium

Where would I be able to buy
Zoobieglue in 55 gallon drums?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by zoobygluie
Where would I be able to buy Zoobieglue in 55 gallon drums?

Where else, at the zoo-be-glued store, on e-Bay, although I got to tell ya, I heard that that stuff is really really (I mean REALLY) inexpensive, so inexpensive that they actually got paid to receive it!

"Zoobygluieeeeeeeeeee" is one of the most adhesive substances known to humanity, but NOT to the greys, why?

 

[ExtravagantDreams]

"Zoobygluieeeeeeeeeee" is one of the most adhesive substances known to humanity, but NOT to the greys, why?

Obvious, the greys can build space ships that actually hold together.

Where on Earth did these grey come from anyway?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by ExtravagantDreams
Where on Earth did these grey come from anyway?

Your average grey space alien is
a native of Boise, Idaho.How many 55 gallon drums of Zoobie
glue does the average grey space
alien fraternity consume per frat
party?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by ZOObySHOE
How many 55 gallon drums of Zoobie glue does the average grey space
alien fraternity consume per frat party?

Well it is actually an inverse function as the quantity consumed has a reverse preportional effect inasmuch as the percentage of ingestion declines with the affectivnesse's surmounting of the ingestions affectation. IN other (simpler) words "the more they consume, the less affect it has on them" hence the real amounts remain secret, to this day! as we'll need to kill you, if you can figure it out.
Signed; "Bubba 'n the Boys" (Written in lieu of MRP)

Since MRP is the ONLY person on the planet who knows the real, and needed amount of "55 gallon drums of zoobie-glue' to have the effect that is the cause of the effects reaction, what does it measure in degrees(°) Rankine??

 

[liljediboi]

well. halfway to the original goal of 1000 posts. haha. id post a dumb question, but i just got 54/100 on a test, so i feel dumb enought thank you.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons Since MRP is the ONLY person on the planet who knows the real, and needed amount of "55 gallon drums of zoobie-glue' to have the effect that is the cause of the effects reaction, what does it measure in degrees(°) Rankine??

There is a small conference room at the end of a cramped corridor in an abandoned underground bunker beneath the West Wing of the White house where full grown men are presently growling at each other in a vigorous difference of opinion over this very issue. It is likewise, strangely enough, the subject of a "thread" of graffiti in the third stall of the men's bathroom on the ground floor level of the Mall Of The America's in Minneapolis, Minnesota. What should a person do if they discover that the Person they have been corresponding with over the internet actually passed away several years ago?

Robin PARSONS (ABT 1925 - 10 Dec 1991)http://kropf.org/html/d0005/I219.html

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
What should a person do if they discover that the Person they have been corresponding with over the internet actually passed away several years ago?
Robin PARSONS (ABT 1925 - 10 Dec 1991)http://kropf.org/html/d0005/I219.html

Come to the realization that the internet has gone etherial and that it is presently connected to "The Beyond" in such a manner that communicating with the dead is now as simply as www.talkingtodeadpeople.grav[/URL] thereby connecting the "World Wide Weeb" with the "Universal Metaphysical Realm" (UMR) as to enable all of the persons, past, present, and future to communicate in an open, and friendly, fashion, to further the profiteering of all of the "Communal Charities" all over the Universe. So remember. please GIVE, the dead need the ca$h! (Some of them are being asked to pay to enter Heaven, to bad they couldn't take it with them!)

How do you go about collecting on a bequest, that is in a name similar to your, but all along knowing that, since you are adopted, it cannot [b]really[/b] be any relation to you, but you need the money, so you try anyways, but you don't know how??

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons How do you go about collecting on a bequest, that is in a name similar to your, but all along knowing that, since you are adopted, it cannot really be any relation to you, but you need the money, so you try anyways, but you don't know how??

Legal adoption into the clan Parsons constitutes legal membership in the clan Parsons with all the attendant rights to loose change provided you could establish a link between your adoptive parents and the deceased namesake which would best be accomplished by calling yourself "The Lowlander", getting a large sword, and lopping the heads off of every Parsons who may be of more potentially direct relation urging yourself on with the motto:"There Can Be Only One!"What's the best way to explain to a sword weilding maniac that what you just said was "Yes, I am a person," and not: "Yes, I am a Parsons"?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
What's the best way to explain to a sword weilding maniac that what you just said was "Yes, I am a person," and not: "Yes, I am a Parsons"?

From a minimium of fifty (50') feet!

When you are fifty feet (50') from this 'sword wielding maniac', you decide to tell him that you meant "Person" not "Parsons", and he pulls out him 457 magnum, takes aim, what is the best direction to jump, left?, right?, forwards?, backwards?, up? or down?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
When you are fifty feet (50') from this 'sword wielding maniac', you decide to tell him that you meant "Person" not "Parsons", and he pulls out him 457 magnum, takes aim, what is the best direction to jump, left?, right?, forwards?, backwards?, up? or down?

This would be a good time to lean 17 degrees left of the normal, rotate on that axis, and scoot into the conveniently located perpendicular universe you'll find located just ahead.

Recently, when I was repelling down the side of Big Ben, London, England, I encountered a black and white stray cat who was trying to pound in a piton as part of his continuing effort to ascend the clock tower. When I pointed out the large number of pitons already in place from previous feline conquests of the monumental time piece, he hissed aggressively at me and inexpertly hurled his hammer in my direction. It suddenly occurred to me that I had found the answer to a question that had been nagging me for years: Why do you never see cats playing softball? Obviously, I seemed to have discovered, cats can't pitch.
In light of the facts of this anecdote, how many hairs does the average cat shed during the ascent of Big Ben to the cat lounge in the rafters above the clockwork?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Recently yelled from the side of a clockface, in the U.S.A., (while holding his pistol, and ranting) outside the place of work of zoobyshoe
Recently, when I was repelling down the side of Big Ben, London, England, I encountered a black and white stray cat who was trying to pound in a piton as part of his continuing effort to ascend the clock tower. When I pointed out the large number of pitons already in place from previous feline conquests of the monumental time piece, he hissed aggressively at me and inexpertly hurled his hammer in my direction. It suddenly occurred to me that I had found the answer to a question that had been nagging me for years: Why do you never see cats playing softball? Obviously, I seemed to have discovered, cats can't pitch.
In light of the facts of this anecdote, how many hairs does the average cat shed during the ascent of Big Ben to the cat lounge in the rafters above the clockwork?

Well according to the Journal "Essential Catter", the average number of Hairs shed by any given Cat in a given period of time will be the exponent of the cats weight multiplied by the average numeber of Birds eaten in the last twelve years. But it is clearly stipulated that Cats encountered While climbing the face of Big Ben (NOT the same as the Statue of Liberty!) have a severalfold increase in Hair dander, Hair loss, and Fur Ball cough-up factors. The resulting figures gave credibility to the theory that climbing the face of a Clocktower, imbues into said Felines, the very same mentality as that of serial Snipers, hence it is known that the effects of the Post traumatic stress Inducement that arises from the placing of the Cats paws upon the faces of dials, hands, or clock faces, arrests the nomally resistant affective hair retention system of the dermus of Feline climbers to the degree that shedding of hair at such altitudes is in congrouity with the known factors of fur ball eruction to the degree that the Actual number of hairs becomes impossible to establish with any reliability beyond the present known count of Seventy seven thousand, per milisecond, per lumen, per tick of the clock. (Completely different if done in the darkness, so we won't even go there!)

Now, what I really want to know is exactly how many times has zoobyshoe climbed?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Now, what I really want to know is exactly how many times has zoobyshoe climbed?

It's interesting you should ask that question because , once, when repelling down a rope that had been thrown up into the air by an Indian Fakir I encountered that mystical gentleman while he was on the way up. Not able to contain his curiosity as to how I had come to be "up" there in the first place, he interviewed me on the matter for several minutes but none of my clear and simple answers seemed to satisfy him, so I came to the conclusion he was unaware of the elementary laws of western physics, and that this ignorance is what allowed him to go around throwing unsupported ropes into the air and climbing them in the first place, and that for both our sakes I ought probably not disabuse him of any illusions at that particular time.Shortly before World War I, I was excavating some coal from a family mine at the back of our property in West Virginia when I broke through the bituminous wall ahead of me into a very small chamber in which an Indian Fakir was napping.
He awoke, asked what year it was, and upon being told, he said that he had been holding his breath in there for 137 years, but that, much worse, he had been holding a couple other things and wanted directions to the nearest outhouse.

As I lead him toward that goal he chattered away in the manner of a man who'd been alone too long and began hinting, rather obviously, that if I would only ask him he would be happy to explain the interesting story of how he'd come to be trapped in the coal seam all those years before.

Having work to do, I left him at the outhouse and returned to the mine. When I emerged at the end of the day, he was nowhere to be found, and I never saw him again.

Given the facts of this anecdote, what is the maximum amount of Indian Fakirs, in weight, that a single West Virginian Miner can extract from a seam of soft coal in a sixteen hour work day?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by a soot darkened coal miner from lost ridge Louisiana who speaks in nothing bigger then three letter words in pidgeon "fringlish" Translated herein into "regular English" by one 'zoobyshoe'...(a real cracker-upper)[/color]
Given the facts of this anecdote, what is the maximum amount of Indian Fakirs, in weight, that a single West Virginian Miner can extract from a seam of soft coal in a sixteen hour work day?

Well statistically speaking, the shear number of "Fakirs", in the world, limits the resultant mean average annual imput of "Fakirs" into coal seams, resulting in a false reading that misconscrues the values averaging (that is requisite to have the required knowledge) as to respond soundly to the inquiry, as it has been quired, hence we must be able to analyse the shear values of "Fakirs" relative to the output of seamed coal, per capita, per day, per tonne, per season, per methane releases (as well) in a reletively normalized fashion. So the answer would be around twelve (12)

Given that while I was descending into the abyss of the Atlantic Ocean, I saw a woman, riding her bicycle, on the bottom, but she had no clothes on, so she was getting extremely wet, how many monkeys did it take to oil the bike chain?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Given that while I was descending into the abyss of the Atlantic Ocean, I saw a woman, riding her bicycle, on the bottom, but she had no clothes on, so she was getting extremely wet, how many monkeys did it take to oil the bike chain?

Frankly, I don't know. I consulted the classic on this matter, J. Jefferson Johnson's The True And Accurate Use of Simians, Marsupials, and Lemurs in Chain Drive Lubrication but I found, to my disapointment, that he completely neglects to address the whole issue of bicycle chain lubrication for marine use. I can't tell you how surprised I was at this gap in such an otherwise comprehensive treatment of the subject.Earlier in my life I had the rare opportunity of meeting the famous Russian composer, Plinckoff whose sonatas for the upper fifteen notes of the Pianoforte changed music forever, sort of. He regarded me as if I were something that had squirmed out of a soft, brown apple, and declared: "You will never understand how to perform my compositions! Do not try!" To which I replied: "Even the goatherd of Vladivostok, with his milking-nimbled fingers does not understand how he should perform your compositions. Should he not try? Whereupon Plinckoff put his arm around my shoulder and said:"What a bright young performer you are! I will compose for you, someday, if I live that long."

I soon forgot all about him. Did he live that long?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally Composed by zoobishoe
Earlier in my life I had the rare opportunity of meeting the famous Russian composer, Plinckoff whose sonatas for the upper fifteen notes of the Pianoforte changed music forever, sort of. He regarded me as if I were something that had squirmed out of a soft, brown apple, and declared: "You will never understand how to perform my compositions! Do not try!" To which I replied: "Even the goatherd of Vladivostok, with his milking-nimbled fingers does not understand how he should perform your compositions. Should he not try? Whereupon Plinckoff put his arm around my shoulder and said:"What a bright young performer you are! I will compose for you, someday, if I live that long."
I soon forgot all about him. Did he live that long?

Well not unlike you zoobyshoe, I too have an extensive collection of reading materials, and in a perusal of the MOST recent copy of "Composers Who Compose Composite Compositions while Camping" your Mr. Plinckoff was exposed for what he truly is, a Composite Fraud, as it arises that the man has NEVER, ever, composed a singular piece of Compositional work, for himself, never mind that even the ones that he could possibly lay a Side Claim to, as having assisted in compostion, it turns out that his major contribution to the compositional effort(s) was to provide the paper, hence he is nothing but a fraud and is not even worth looking up in the "Anuals of Persons, Famous, or InFamous, Living, or Dead, composed, or Decomposing" (nevermind I seem to have misplaced my most recent copy of that one, sooo...) for the simple fact of the matter is that he will probably not even be listed in such and illustrious publication as it would be denegrating to the Editors of said noble enterprise.
That stated, he is still alive, and well, deep well actually, as it seems that he owes his creditors mucho buck$$$ for all of that stolen paper.

While reading in the "Anuals of Journal Anuals" the article stated that the history of "The Journal" was an 'anual', (and that this was a yearly event) hence, the question is begged as to just what time does the publication get distributed, annually?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally misspelled(sp?) by Mr. Robin Parsons
While reading in the "Anuals of Journal Anuals" the article stated that the history of "The Journal" was an 'anual', (and that this was a yearly event) hence, the question is begged as to just what time does the publication get distributed, annually?

By simply calling their headquarters in Potosi, Missouri I was able to learn that the answer to that question is a straightforward 2:49 P.M. I called back several times in succession, asked the same question and received the same answer. I thought to myself, "Hm, that sounds suspiciously consistent. What's really going on here?" I am now camped in the grove of trees across the road from their offices with a pair of high-powered binoculars trained on their third floor suite, writing to you from a wireless laptop.Shortly before World War One I had the peculiar experience of a chance encounter with the Russian conductor Fyevor Hotanivich Scaldinyevski on the streets of Far Rockaway, Queens, New York. He regarded me, a complete stranger to him, with a look of anger one would only expect from someone bent on revenge for the seduction of his wife, and shouted "The celli! The celli! Why can't the celli count a simple 13/21 rhythm!
What's the problem with them!??"

Fearing for my life I kicked him in the shin and ran.

On the train back to Brooklyn I divided 13 by 21 and got .619047619, but that didn't seem to mean anything in particular.
Years later, though, I received a check made out to precisely that amount as the sum total of the royalties earned by the sale of my book Scaldinyevski: The Far Rockaway Years. Given that I had purchased the only copy of that book that ever sold myself, that decimal took on a mystical signifigance for me whose true meaning I have still not completely fathomed.

In light of the facts of this anecdote, what do you suppose is the best use to be made of 5000 unread copies of a biography of an angry and menacing Russian conductor?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

A truncated citation of the quetion that was originally posited by one zoobyshoe, male of female, AKA 9 of 7 _*[/color][/size] (?)
In light of the facts of this anecdote, what do you suppose is the best use to be made of 5000 unread copies of a biography of an angry and menacing Russian conductor?

One word, P-R-O-J-E-C-T-I-L-E-S, as in, should it be that that deleterious, and offensively impudent progression of an scalar notation, Ever threatens you again, call upon us all, and we will assist you in the launching of the 5000 superflous volumes of the tome, towards the offending indication of a primate, as to ensure that anyone, and everyone, knows, with an aclarity that is clearly/presently, unknown, NOT TO MESS WITH THE ZOOB!

So how many unread tomes does it take to completely bury a former Russian psuedo (poser) Composer?

(BTW I read that book, "Scaldinyevski: The Far Rockaway Years" they have a smuggled copy of it, here in the Kingston library. Reeks of the fish that it was buried in, in transit to Canada, or is that just the Authors scent??)

*[/color]Editors (blue) notation, don't know why that Boob Parsons is still sooooo silly, knows darn well that it is supposed to be "Y of X" and NOT "9 of 7", probably just watched too much television, in his life.
If He makes such errors again, please inform me, Thanks Editor.[/color]

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally wondered by the wonder boy, or boy wonder ROBIN So how many unread tomes does it take to completely bury a former Russian psuedo (poser) Composer?

How many tomes to entomb? Twenty times twenty.

(BTW I read that book, "Scaldinyevski: The Far Rockaway Years" [/color] they have a smuggled copy of it, here in the Kingston library. Reeks of the fish that it was buried in, in transit to Canada, or is that just the Authors scent??)[/color]

I love the smell of Zoobies in the morning. Smells like...napalm.As a young man, shortly before World war One I had the enchanting experience of a chance encounter with famed Russian violin virtuoso Skrachimir Scrichanovich Shrilikovki on an elevator in the Department of Public Works in Chatsworth, N.Y. U.S.A.
He regarded me, a total stranger to him, with the look you'd expect to see on the face of a man who happened to notice an automobile-flattened animal on the side of the road, and said: "That's odd. I was certain I'd flushed twice." To which I retorted, "I thought you had, too". Whereupon he put his arm around my shoulder and said, "You are an impertinent and oblique young man. Someday you will make a big noise in the world, but people will mistake it for a large truck
going by outside."

Given the facts of this anecdote, disgorge, if you would, a response to the following quetion: why don't animals learn to look both ways before crossing?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally SUNG (off key) by one known as the Y of X, or the male of the female, or zoobyshoe..."The reek of Napalm, in the morning"
As a young man, shortly before World war One I had the enchanting experience of a chance encounter with famed Russian violin virtuoso Skrachimir Scrichanovich Shrilikovki on an elevator in the Department of Public Works in Chatsworth, N.Y. U.S.A.
He regarded me, a total stranger to him, with the look you'd expect to see on the face of a man who happened to notice an automobile-flattened animal on the side of the road, and said: "That's odd. I was certain I'd flushed twice." To which I retorted, "I thought you had, too". Whereupon he put his arm around my shoulder and said, "You are an impertinent and oblique young man. Someday you will make a big noise in the world, but people will mistake it for a large truck going by outside."
Given the facts of this anecdote, disgorge, if you would, a response to the following quetion: why don't animals learn to look both ways before crossing?

Well, very clearly, the answer is in your little short anec-doting inasmuch as it is simple to note that that Famed Russian Violin Virtuoso plays with such force, that he is emitting sounds that only animals can hear, hence he is instigating a deafening volume of sound that is circumnavigating the planet, as a resonant harmonic that only all of the Non-human animals can hear, and it's interpretation into "Common Animal English" (language) is "It is safe to cross the road now", probably why the use of the analogy of your face as appearing as that of a crushed particle of road kill, one that required a 'second flushing' to evacuate from the face of the planet.

Clearly his notation of you making a large mark[/size] in the world, but it being mistaken for "A large truck", shows how little he realizes about your current situation, as, to the best of my knowledge (TTBOMK) you have NOT been mistaken for any kind of large truck, but rather the sound of a growing mushroom, blooming late in the season, and clearly ready to pollinate!

Given that it is so clear that zoobyshoe, napalm scented, is ready to pollinate, are there an volounteers?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally chortled[/color] by Mr. Robin Parsons in an obvious fit of marshmallow intoxication[/color]
Given that it is so clear that zoobyshoe, napalm scented, is ready to pollinate, are there an volounteers?

There seems to be and endless stream of Gray Space Alien Wenches, Paralyzing Old Hags, Succubi, and Telemarketers clammouring for this opportunity. I have been referring them to you.A recent perusal of the famous "Whinings" of the ancient Roman thinker and life commentator, Scabius Cankerous, brought this particularly thoughtful story to my attention:

"This morning I was awaken at sunrise by the sounds of some Phoenecian sailors playing upon the lyre and tambour and singing wistfully in their own tongue as they passed by outside my window. Perhaps the song expressed a longing to return to their homeland, or perhaps to the women waiting for them there, or perhaps just to be back on their great ships bound for some new, wonderful port. These, at least, were the ponderings about their song that passed through my mind as I rose up from my litter and flung the contents of my chamber pot out the window on them for waking a sick man from his slumber."

Now enlighten me if I missed something, but I found the story to be extremely confusing given that the ancient Romans are famous to this day for their celebrated indoor plumbing.