Ask a Stupid Quetion Get a Stupid Answer

[amwbonfire]

If a century is 100 years, why isn't 1000 years called a decacentury? What is up with that?!?

 

[jimmy p]

If 5 cats chased 6 dogs to the pound, what would the cats have for dinner?

Pea soup on toast.

If a century is 100 years, why isn't 1000 years called a decacentury? What is up with that?!?

Because then you would have to call a decade "10/century" which is a mouthful.

How come you can eat hotdogs, but get arrested for eating any other heated family pets?

 

[The Bob]

How come you can eat hotdogs, but get arrested for eating any other heated family pets?

Because the hotdog is a slang name for a something rude that has nothing to do with pets.

Did anyone miss me?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[jimmy p]

Did anyone miss me?

The Bob (2004 ©)

I'm not sure, I didnt know anyone was trying to hit you.

Is this a trick quetion?

 

[The Bob]

Is this a trick quetion?

No it is a trick question.

Why can I not think of anything to type?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[jimmy p]

Why can I not think of anything to type?

The Bob (2004 ©)

Cos you have just typed all you can think of then.


Why was the chicken stapled to Sid Vicious?

 

[The Bob]

Why was the chicken stapled to Sid Vicious?

Because the Cheese was cold.

Random, no?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[jimmy p]

Because the Cheese was cold.

Random, no?

The Bob (2004 ©)

I'll ask the magic 8-ball.

Outlook not so good

Why did the magic 8-ball never help me with my homework?

 

[The Bob]

Why did the magic 8-ball never help me with my homework?

Because the magic 8-ball was actually an Icosahedron and not a Sphere.

Why are monkeys funny?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[jimmy p]

Why are monkeys funny?

The Bob (2004 ©)

Cos if they werent, it would be stupid to laugh at them.

Why is there only one monopoly commission?

 

[The Bob]

Cos if they werent, it would be stupid to laugh at them.

Why is there only one monopoly commission?

Because they can't afford two.

Next question?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[amwbonfire]

Bob, your wish has been granted. Here's a question, or three

Why is the sky blue, and the ground is green?

Why is my hair orange, but my moustache (it's only just started growing) is more of a blonde colour?!?

Why do trees grow towards the sunlight, not away?

Fire away answers!

 

[amwbonfire]

I'm impatient, so I'll answer my own questions and then ask another one (I promise not to answer that one.)

Why is the sky blue, and the ground is green?

Wizards did it.

Why is my hair orange, but my moustache (it's only just started growing) is more of a blonde colour?!?

It's a conspiracy.

Why do trees grow towards the sunlight, not away?

They don't have eyes. If they did, they'd go blind from looking at the sun, and would instead grow away from it, towards the darker ground, like moles . Moles are nifty.



My new question:

If I have one apple and I get another one, then decide I'll eat one of them, does that mean I like apples?

 

[The Bob]

My new question:

If I have one apple and I get another one, then decide I'll eat one of them, does that mean I like apples?

No because you only decided to eat it. You might be every hungry or just foolish to forget you don't like apples.

Music should be banned. Eleaberate?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[The Bob]

Ok, I can't let this thread go down. It has a lot of memeories and funny stuff in it.

So why were people not posting here? or has it got too much?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[amwbonfire]

Ok, I can't let this thread go down.

I said that about the "Girl Trouble" thread, and you saved it! Go Bob!

Now you're at it again, risking your life to save others! GO BOB!

Anyway, "music shouldn't be banned" is the answer.

Here's the new question:

"Are clouds white, or are they black and we just can't see the black?"

 

[The Bob]

I said that about the "Girl Trouble" thread, and you saved it! Go Bob!

Now you're at it again, risking your life to save others! GO BOB!

Cheers Amwbonfire. I do what I can for PF.

Anyway I have made another PF friend. Yay. I was in a tight spot with Monqiue, my PF brother is Jimmy P, so Evo is my PF mom and now I have a nice Amwbonfire of a friend. Oh and Photon and Rathma are joking enemies of Jimmy P so I have to support him. Hehe. I hope you all know I am joking about the enemies. We are all friend really. Just a laugh.

Anyway, "music shouldn't be banned" is the answer.

Here's the new question:

"Are clouds white, or are they black and we just can't see the black?"

Well clouds are probably like cows, all spotted black and white, so they are both.

My question: Why are women sometimes called cows? It is a silly insult.

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[amwbonfire]

Aww, isn't that nice! I'm his friend! :shy: I feel all warm and fuzzy inside!

You can call me Bonfire, or Andy, or Andrew, or even Silly if you want. It's easier than my username, amwbonfire.

And, seeing as though no one else replies to this topic, I'll answer your question.

Women are called cows because:

Cows are female, and so are women. Noticing that both cows and women could be nasty (ever been charged by a cow?), a young man by the name of... um... his name was... Henry, got the two mixed up. He called a woman a cow.

No wait, here's a more plausible lie:

Cows give milk, and so do women (when they're mothers...) Noticing the similarity, a young man called... Tony decided to call women cows, and the name stuck. It was actually first used as an endearing term that Tony used to call his lover. He called her it so much that it became her nickname. One day she left him for 4 other men (she wanted to quadruple-date), and all her friends called her a sl*t. (Sorry for the naughty word!) Anyway, they used to go around saying "Cow is a s***", and then people started thinking a cow was another name for a woman who sleeps around. Eventually cow became an insult that was said to women (it's common useage today.)

Well, I think we all believe that.

Here's my new question:

Why does gravity act towards the Earth?

 

[The Bob]

Aww, isn't that nice! I'm his friend! :shy: I feel all warm and fuzzy inside!

You can call me Bonfire, or Andy, or Andrew, or even Silly if you want. It's easier than my username, amwbonfire.

And, seeing as though no one else replies to this topic, I'll answer your question.

Women are called cows because:

Cows are female, and so are women. Noticing that both cows and women could be nasty (ever been charged by a cow?), a young man by the name of... um... his name was... Henry, got the two mixed up. He called a woman a cow.

No wait, here's a more plausible lie:

Cows give milk, and so do women (when they're mothers...) Noticing the similarity, a young man called... Tony decided to call women cows, and the name stuck. It was actually first used as an endearing term that Tony used to call his lover. He called her it so much that it became her nickname. One day she left him for 4 other men (she wanted to quadruple-date), and all her friends called her a sl*t. (Sorry for the naughty word!) Anyway, they used to go around saying "Cow is a s***", and then people started thinking a cow was another name for a woman who sleeps around. Eventually cow became an insult that was said to women (it's common useage today.)

Well, I think we all believe that.

Oh man, Bonfire (why is it bonfire?). I am in pain here. Man that was so good.

Here's my new question:

Why does gravity act towards the Earth?

Because it has a big sign saying 'If anyone sees Grace Evity, tell her to come towards Earh Thome'. (using the remaining letters) And so Grace come here to see Earh (which is short for erm... Earhem).

So there you go.

Question: Why do bananas split?

The Bob (2004 ©)

 

[amwbonfire]

It's bonfire because my hair is orange. Bonfire's are also orange, and I thought it sounded cool.

Bananas split because it's what they do. You really shouldn't be so nosey - give them some personal space.

New one:

Why is this guys scared:

 

[Zantra]

New one:

Why is this guys scared:

He heard bush might actually be in office 4 more years

 

[Gokul43201]

He heard bush might actually be in office 4 more years

<to complete Zantra's post> How do you teach a jellyfish quantum mechanics ?

 

[Math Is Hard]

Absurd, Gokul. A quantum mechanic can no more teach a jellyfish about sub-atomic laws than a jellyfish can teach a quantum mechanic about the importance of drifting, stinging, and the electro-dynamics of purple weirdness.

I did speak to the jellies once about their views on quantum mechanics, and they put a serious question to me. I could not answer it.

If the anterioflevan, sub-excusian actualities of vitrustical particles are not found to be exclusively intrinso-paleomorphic, then why are the Velkdan-Schmidt curves of their exo-lambrians always dynamified?

 

[Ivan Seeking]

If the anterioflevan, sub-excusian actualities of vitrustical particles are not found to be exclusively intrinso-paleomorphic, then why are the Velkdan-Schmidt curves of their exo-lambrians always dynamified?[/I]

Crabs.

What is the best course of action?

 

[plover]

Crabs.

What is the best course of action?

Ensure that the quantum soup is bouillabaisse.

Why do the sub-excusian actualities of jellyfish never sum to an actual excuse for the existence of jellyfish?

 

[Math Is Hard]

I think this is related to Oeno's axiom/excusium: "Jellyfish existence summation values will be subject to an error margin of 12.6% if you have had more than two glasses of cabernet over the course of the calculation."

What else did Oeno postulate?

 

[Gokul43201]

What else did Oeno postulate?

That you can never catch a jellyfish, even if you are not slower than it. He called this "the Paradox of Ajillies", and its proof involves an infinite sum of sub-excusia. The paradox results from the assumption (known as Oeno's Axiom) that no sum of sub-excusia results in a halfway decent excuse.

In fact, it is widely believed that old Alfred based his Jellitivity Theory on this argument, since it suggests that nothing can travel faster than the speed of roving jellyfish.

But how on Earth did Alfred figure out that the jellies had to belong to nocturnally roving herds of the weird, purple kind ?

 

[plover]

But how on Earth did Alfred figure out that the jellies had to belong to nocturnally roving herds of the weird, purple kind ?

When "Hidden Variables Al", as Hümdinger^* called Alfred, developed the Principle of Equivocation, it revealed that nothing can escape from certain jellyfish, not even light -- unless the light is purple. That is why when these jellyfish are around it is always dark except for the weird, purple glow they give off. He deduced that the jellyfish must be wandering constantly from the fact that it never seems to stay dark longer than the end of the night, except on those rare occasions when a celestial body passes in front of the sun.

Many have theorized which celestial bodies might do this. One night when Alfred got lost trying to find his way back to his house from the Institute of Adventitious Studies in Hoboken, he was at found 3 am driving a Zamboni around downtown Edmonton, and using a hockey puck to cast shadows from the streetlights onto various objects. When asked if he needed help, he responded "Zpace jellyfish!"

Why did Alfred later call the space jellyfish his biggest blunder?


^* Ermine Hümdinger, who was a bit of a weasel, could be quite catty.

 

[franznietzsche]

If you had just finished off two barrels of the country's finest whiskey, you too would consider anything you did your greatest mistake. Alfred was lucky that his mistake was just the space jellyfish, most people usually get caught in photographs in obscene acts with some even more bizarre than the space jellyfish, the ever elusive "drunk jellyfish", known for breeding under the labels of alcohol bottles.

It was not until recently that the space jellyfish was mathematically proven to be a total fallacy, via the corollary of the Drunk Jellyfish Postulate, however i ahve not been able to find exactly what this postualte states or who first postulated it. Does anyone know?

 

[The Bob]

If you had just finished off two barrels of the country's finest whiskey, you too would consider anything you did your greatest mistake. Alfred was lucky that his mistake was just the space jellyfish, most people usually get caught in photographs in obscene acts with some even more bizarre than the space jellyfish, the ever elusive "drunk jellyfish", known for breeding under the labels of alcohol bottles.

It was not until recently that the space jellyfish was mathematically proven to be a total fallacy, via the corollary of the Drunk Jellyfish Postulate, however i ahve not been able to find exactly what this postualte states or who first postulated it. Does anyone know?

Professor Jim Turner in 1987.

Why are we talking about Jellyfish?

The Bob (2004 ©)