Ask a Stupid Quetion Get a Stupid Answer

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Hurkyl

What time is it?

Time to buy a watch! (Or, wear the one you have at home in your drawer, or, time to annoy another person with that question, or, time to mind your own business, or, time to get a life, or, time to stop asking what time is it, or, time for me to leave, or,....)

Why do some people scream answers at you, when it never changes the accuracy/inaccuracy of the responce??

 

[cmdr_sponge]

maybe you look deaf

why do stupid questions deserve stupid answers?

 

[FZ+]

They don't. But life isn't fair.

What is fair?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by FZ+
They don't. But life isn't fair.

What is fair?

Stop yelling at me!

If people speak of the "big inning" of time, do they mean to imply that there will be a "big outing" of time?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Mentat

If people speak of the "big inning" of time, do they mean to imply that there will be a "big outing" of time?

No, just a Big Time!


What is a Big Time?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
No, just a Big Time!


What is a Big Time?

The opposite of a small time, duh!

Why is there a "b" at the end of "dumb"?

 

[cmdr_sponge]

to confuse the ppl it applies to

why isn't phonetically spelt phonetically?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by cmdr_sponge
to confuse the ppl it applies to

why isn't phonetically spelt phonetically?

It's demostrably paradoxical (a Wuliheron-ish answer). Or, because math says so (and Alexander-ish answer).

Why do people consider the heart to be the "seat of motivation"?

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Mentat
It's demostrably paradoxical (a Wuliheron-ish answer). Or, because math says so (and Alexander-ish answer).

Why do people consider the heart to be the "seat of motivation"?

well, what would you like to call it? the 'chair of motivation'?

where do babies come from?

 

[quantumdude]

Originally posted by maximus
where do babies come from?

Just add water to baby powder.

Why can't you hear colors?

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Tom
Just add water to baby powder.

Why can't you hear colors?

for the exact same reason that you can't see sound!


why is hot water hot instead of cold?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally askes by Maximus

why is hot water hot instead of cold?

Well, in the case Hot V Cold (#456 C SCUSA) the jury was apprised of the accusation of prejudice that arose from the hot water accusing the cold water of actually not being cold enough, the rebuttal from the hot water was to deride the reputation of the cold water is such a manner as to impose upon the 17^th amendement rights, of said cold water, as to ensure that the allegation of the inferance of the "non temperate" nature of the water was to be examined by a physicist, an expert in the field of water temperature, so pending the outcome of the final assessment of the assay of the true state of the waters nature, this question cannot be stupidly responded to, aside from the legal implications, to this author, for the possibilities of breech of temporal trust in his blatant, and oh so public, display of disrespect towards such a thermal fluid issue.

Oooooops, this just in, it seems that a restraining order has been placed upon any further explanation of the jurisprudence that is being set, in this particularily contentious issue between hot water and cold water, hence, futher discourse upon siad matter will be met with the force of law as to ensure that all legalities are maintained to the fullest extent of the laws legal ability to extend the long arm of the law pertaining to said allegation of frigidity with respect to the heated matter, order # 398275647384595066003038075497-j-485756393 part; 'c' section, 42

Is that about the longest 'non responce' I could think of?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Is that about the longest 'non responce' I could think of?

No, you just don't like typing too much.

How many nits could a nit-picker pick if a nit-picker could pick nits?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by J-Man
No, you just don't like typing too much.

How many nits could a nit-picker pick if a nit-picker could pick nits?

As many nits as the nit-picker could pick, you nit-wit!

There are people who are "witty". And there are people who are "half-wits". But what about other fractions? What's a "quarter-wit", or a "third-wit".

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Origianlly asked by Mentat

There are people who are "witty". And there are people who are "half-wits". But what about other fractions? What's a "quarter-wit", or a "third-wit".

Nope there are only 1/2 wits, the rest are witless!

If you are tuly "witless", does that preclude you from being a wit-ness?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Nope there are only 1/2 wits, the rest are witless!

If you are tuly "witless", does that preclude you from being a wit-ness?

Let me think about that for a while...
...
hmm...
uh...42!

How old is God?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Mentat

How old is God?

About as old as a creator of a universe can be, thought of as, "to the N^th degree, and BeYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOND" !

How far past the N^th degree can you go?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
About as old as a creator of a universe can be, thought of as, "to the N^th degree, and BeYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOND" !

How far past the N^th degree can you go?

About N^N.

Am I conscious?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by Mentat

Am I conscious?

Only if you are not consciously asking the question, cause a conscious person doesn't ask if they are conscious, only unconscious people ask if they are conscious.

Get it?

 

[J-Man]

Originally asked by Mr. Robin Parsons
Get it?

No, Segways are overrated. And probably misspelled.

What would happen if we really gave peace a chance?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by J-Man
No, Segways are overrated. And probably misspelled.

What would happen if we really gave peace a chance?

The very fabric of spacetime itself would destroy itself. Sudden, and utter, chaos would errupt. Nothing could ever exist again. All because humans defied their nature .

What would happen if I traveled to the past and killed my grandfather, before he gave birth to my father?

 

[FZ+]

A giant golden and divinely floating 42 would appear and smite thee most dreadfully.

What would happen if Alexander became a christian one day?

 

[MSI]

that will be the end of the world

what is the most stuped question in this topic?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by MSI

what is the most stuped question in this topic?

The one that didn't ask a question, but rather, responded to the answer, that the question, didn't ask!

Is the reason that there is no word, in the English language, that rhymes with Orange, because none of the other words can reach a note in the O'range??

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons

Is the reason that there is no word, in the English language, that rhymes with Orange, because none of the other words can reach a note in the O'range??

maybe.


if beauty is in the eye of the beholder than why hasn't anyone thought of finding this "Beholder", scooping out his eyes, eating them, and thus become beautyful (or full-of-beauty)?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originallyposted by Maximus

if beauty is in the eye of the beholder than why hasn't anyone thought of finding this "Beholder", scooping out his eyes, eating them, and thus become beautyful (or full-of-beauty)?

Well since it is you who are/is the beholder, well, I wouldn't recommend that you try it, cause you won't be able to see outer beauty anymore, and I doubt that it will increase you ability to see inner beauty any better then with your eyes functioning properly.

Stay Beautiful, inside, and out!

The is a new theory out, "Massless Dark Matter" Do you think it will matter?

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons


The is a new theory out, "Massless Dark Matter" Do you think it will matter?

not massivly...


if someone touched your godhead, how would it feel?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by maximus
not massivly...


if someone touched your godhead, how would it feel?

Uh, ain't that a little private to be talking about on the PFs? (Pun intended.)

Does anything rhyme with purple?

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Mentat

Does anything rhyme with purple?

Murple!

if you were a nun, could you ever make a pun?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by maximus
Murple!

if you were a nun, could you ever make a pun?

Son, it should be pretty fun to see a nun make a pun, but there are none, who'd make a pun, under the sun.

Is this statement false?

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Mentat
Son, it should be pretty fun to see a nun make a pun, but there are none, who'd make a pun, under the sun.

Is this statement false?

well, first off, i am not your son. secondly, it would not be fun. also, there are many nuns who I'm sure would love to make a pun, but for the love of god, not under the sun! they'de melt!

have you ever noticed that the first letter of every second letter in the third letter of everyones first name is actually the ninth letter of the the second alphabet, and is always divisable by three?

 

[Cummings]

Originally posted by maximus
well, first off, i am not your son. secondly, it would not be fun. also, there are many nuns who I'm sure would love to make a pun, but for the love of god, not under the sun! they'de melt!

have you ever noticed that the first letter of every second letter in the third letter of everyones first name is actually the ninth letter of the the second alphabet, and is always divisable by three?

umm, no, its 3.14159

What is the fifth number of our alphabet?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Cummings
umm, no, its 3.14159

What is the fifth number of our alphabet?

um...B. No, 6. No...ummm...42!

How come a tree's rings tell you how old the tree is, don't they have any shame?

 

[maximus]

Originally posted by Mentat

How come a tree's rings tell you how old the tree is, don't they have any shame?

becuase trees, like lettuce and mustard, grow only more respectable with age.


why doesn't the devil face work?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Maximus

why doesn't the devil face work?

Ah, but you are fooled, as it is the devils greatest trick, making you think he doesn't exist, when all the time you are being seduced by his D'evil!

And now, the "Homer(s)ized" version...

Is the reason that there is no word, in the English language, that rhymes with Orange, because none of the other words can reach a note in the d'Oh-range??


(As suggested by; "A friend"..Tee heee heee heheheheheheheheR?)

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Is the reason that there is no word, in the English language, that rhymes with Orange, because none of the other words can reach a note in the d'Oh-range??

No, gorange rhymes with orange and is clearly in the d'oh! range.

<------d'oh!------->
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;gorange

see?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Insert Homer (here)

Originally asked by J-Man

see?

WHat? where? D'Oh, Ya!, that! there! yup!


Have you ever used, ooooor, been a Victim of …….
"Reverse _Bu^mp_kin Tecka-Gnawl-(d')O(h)-GEE!"??

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Have you ever used, ooooor, been a Victim of …….
"Reverse _Bu^mp_kin Tecka-Gnawl-(d')O(h)-GEE!"??

I never even knew there was such a thing.

If the airspeed velocity of an unladen, (European,) swallow is 42 knots North, but it's airspeed velocity when laden, (with say a 2 lb. coconut,) is only 17 knots (whatever direction,) what time does the train arrive at the station?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by J-Man

If the airspeed velocity of an unladen, (European,) swallow is 42 knots North, but it's airspeed velocity when laden, (with say a 2 lb. coconut,) is only 17 knots (whatever direction,) what time does the train arrive at the station?

Well, if the bird (That's me?) uses "Reverse Bumpkin Technology" (patents pending, BTW) then the right hand rules tells us that the summation fo the vectors cancels out to twelve gad-zillion meters per half year, (squared...naturally) in hyperspacatial reality, but in this dimensionality, the train got derailed, so at 42 O'clock!


When Mr, Robin Parsons, representing the (Wild ) bear, called himself the (i)D(i)ot typissst, was it apparent to you that his use of the two ( ) around his iconographic i was actually to indicate the reflective qualities of mirrors, to the effect that the D could be seen as 'duplicable', ERGO creating the actual title of (i)D (i)Dot, which is a representation of the actuality of a human, with respect to creation, (My ID is simply I'DOT), and that the furthering of this analogy is found in the generation of this iconographic illustration of humanity to include the "Corporeally Ensconced Mind" (that is a Human being) represented by the i, (which is the mind, above the body that it is ensconced within) which is a product of a mirroring effect itself, (hence the two mirrors ( )) ensconcing/generating the i) is further "Universally Humanized in Commonality" by the (i)D (i)Dot's Title in it's signification of the very self reflective quality of being human, such that if you couldn't distinguish between the self generation of i's, then you probably really are (the one and only, as the people in this forum do NOT qualify for such a title, BUT, there is that Universal LAW that states; “There is an exception to EVERY RULE!) a true, and actual, the one and only, in the entire Universe, idiot?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Well, if the bird (That's me?) uses "Reverse Bumpkin Technology" (patents pending, BTW) then the right hand rules tells us that the summation fo the vectors cancels out to twelve gad-zillion meters per half year, (squared...naturally) in hyperspacatial reality, but in this dimensionality, the train got derailed, so at 42 O'clock!


When Mr, Robin Parsons, representing the (Wild ) bear, called himself the (i)D(i)ot typissst, was it apparent to you that his use of the two ( ) around his iconographic i was actually to indicate the reflective qualities of mirrors, to the effect that the D could be seen as 'duplicable', ERGO creating the actual title of (i)D (i)Dot, which is a representation of the actuality of a human, with respect to creation, (My ID is simply I'DOT), and that the furthering of this analogy is found in the generation of this iconographic illustration of humanity to include the "Corporeally Ensconced Mind" (that is a Human being) represented by the i, (which is the mind, above the body that it is ensconced within) which is a product of a mirroring effect itself, (hence the two mirrors ( )) ensconcing/generating the i) is further "Universally Humanized in Commonality" by the (i)D (i)Dot's Title in it's signification of the very self reflective quality of being human, such that if you couldn't distinguish between the self generation of i's, then you probably really are (the one and only, as the people in this forum do NOT qualify for such a title, BUT, there is that Universal LAW that states; “There is an exception to EVERY RULE!) a true, and actual, the one and only, in the entire Universe, idiot?

Is that even a quetion?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by mentat

Is that even a quetion?

D'Oh look, "Reverse Bumpkin Technology" (patents pending) at work!

What does "Patents Pending" really mean??

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
What does "Patents Pending" really mean??

It comes from the Greek words "paten" (pants) and "tspen" (to sue) and "ding" (dang). Literally, "to sue your dang pants off."

Why do they want your pants?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Origially asked by J-Man

Why do they want your pants?

So they can "pend" them what else would/could it have been!

Is the word "Karaoke" translated into English, "Karry-Off-Key"??

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Is the word "Karaoke" translated into English, "Karry-Off-Key"??

Yes, but most people screw it up and translate it as "Barry's Monkey", and their voice cracks when they say it.

Is the world safe from joggers?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by J-Man
Yes, but most people screw it up and translate it as "Barry's Monkey", and their voice cracks when they say it.

Is the world safe from joggers?

You mean, is the safe jog from worlders? Or, is the jog world from safers?

If a tree falls in the middle of the forest, and no one is there to hear it, does it kill a squirrel?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Mentat
If a tree falls in the middle of the forest, and no one is there to hear it, does it kill a squirrel?

Well now, the tree falling at angle &Theta; with the cooresponding angle of interferential differentiation being &alpha; twix the variable of the known &alpha;/&Omega; range, the squirrel, {if present} must execute a double back-flipping summersault, at an inverted angle of
&zeta; * &asymp; thus arranging for the momentum to be &equiv; to &plusmn; the &radic; &pi; thus obtaining the maximum velocity achievable as to ensure that, (if the squirrel is present) the last longest branch may, or may not, strike the squirrel firmly and soundly, hence making it much simpler for all of us to enjoy squirrel "frikase'e" this evening.

If Ms. Spelt, miss spelt, misspelled, would she need a legal name change?

 

[J-Man]

Mr. Robin Parsons asked:
If Ms. Spelt, miss spelt, misspelled, would she need a legal name change?

Only if she married Mr. Spelling, cause she'd then be 'Misses Spelling'.

Why do people tell me I'm out of shape? After all, 'round' is a shape.

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by J-Man

Why do people tell me I'm out of shape? After all, 'round' is a shape.

Because it doesn't fit into there 'square thinking' minds!

Why does a "Square Thinking Mind" not fit into a round hole??

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Because it doesn't fit into there 'square thinking' minds!

Why does a "Square Thinking Mind" not fit into a round hole??

Why, do you really need a phenomenological anal probe?

Why do people believe that aliens use anal probes?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Mentat

Why do people believe that aliens use anal probes?

Because, 'rumor has it' they keep using the "Back Door", of the planet, for entry.

How does one employ a "phenomenological anal probe" for testing flatulate spectroscopy?