Ask a Stupid Quetion Get a Stupid Answer

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Well, I think that the answer is "Yes", but I had been leaning towards "No actually, but, maybe, if I think about it, longer, I can come up with something else, you know, like a 'third alternative', or something like that, so hang on to it, (real tight!) and I'll get back to you, on that, "quetion", real soon, ok?

If you tell someone that you are going to "Fix there clock", do you?

Depends on what time it is.

But how can you know that, if there clock's not fixed yet?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by mentat

But how can you know that, if there clock's not fixed yet?

Dial up the Sun, cause he/she/it always knows what time it really is!
(Especially those Achiever Sun's!)


What time is it then?


EDIT a / in the switch

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Dial up the Sun, cause he/she/it always knows what time it really is!
(Especially those Achiever Sun's!)


What time is it then?

42:00

Why are guys so often stereotyped as the "butt-pickers", when as many females as males do this?

 

[J-Man]

Mentat asked
Why are guys so often stereotyped as the "butt-pickers", when as many females as males do this?

In the great orchards of cigarette trees, the males have traditionally been the "butt-pickers", often picking 20 bushels or more of "butts" a day. But since the 1960's, the women's libers have demanded to pick butts for equal pay. The women now can pick up to 30 bushels of "butts" a day, and they get the same pay as the guys who pick 20 bushels.

Did I spell "bushels" correctly?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by J-Man

Did I spell "bushels" correctly?

Not really, I had heard it was "El Bush"!

Is Mr. Robin Parsons...

A) A retired Janitor?

B) A retarded Janitor?

C) Both of the above?

 

[J-Man]

Mr. Robin Parsons asked:
Is Mr. Robin Parsons...

A) A retired Janitor?

B) A retarded Janitor?

C) Both of the above?

Hmmm, well, it can't be (A) because he has feet, not tires. It can't be (B) because he was never tarded the first time. So, by the process of elimination, the answer must be (C).

If you read a "self-help" book written by somebody else, isn't it "help" instead of "self-help"?

 

[FZ+]

No, because all the help, in the form of your money, goes to the author.

Is education a zero-sum game?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by FZ+

Is education a zero-sum game?

Well yes, for 'sum', like myself, it amounts to nothing more then an "education", which you cannot use, as per the (insert politico's name...No, NOT george!) others, like that, who have a 'sum of zero' in their educations, as to ensure that in the totality of the additions of the Merits of Education, all of the exceedingly high scores, that a site like this one would generate, would be completley offset to 'sum to zero' as per the above persons name, and their contribution to the total. Thankfully, that person does NOT post here!

(HI Jean!)


If the ('Ohmbre) "Man from Nantuckett", went for "Fish in D'is Bucket", how many could/did he catch?

 

[J-Man]

Mr. Robin Parsons asked:
If the ('Ohmbre) "Man from Nantuckett", went for "Fish in D'is Bucket", how many could/did he catch?

None, there's a hole in the Bucket dear Liza, dear Liza.

With what shall we fix it dear Henry, dear Henry?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by J-Man

With what shall we fix it dear Henry, dear Henry?

Henrys not here, so stepping up to the plate to replace dear Henry, the l'Ohmbre from Nantuckett

"We'll fix it with glue, that's what we'll do, and when it is fixed with glue, well, then we'll fix YOU too!"

If the "Skies the limit", haven't you missed the rest of the entire Universe?

 

[Zargawee]

Stupid But Important Question : Why this topic died ?

 

[MSI]

because...
to be alive again

why why?

 

[LogicalAtheist]

why why?

Just because..

Question: Dude, what the hell is that?

 

[J-Man]

LogicalAtheist asked:
Dude, what the hell is that?

I know what the hell that is. It's a... hmmm...
What the hell is that?

 

[MSI]

well it is ... ohh i forgot

what was billgate thinking of when they finished win 95?

 

[LogicalAtheist]

"I'm in the money! I'm in the money"

What is Bill Gates thinking this VERY second? List the time you're responding!

 

[J-Man]

LogicalAtheist asked:
What is Bill Gates thinking this VERY second? List the time you're responding!

Do I want fries with that?
(current time is about 15:35:38 EST)

How could I possibly forget to ask a quetion?

 

[MSI]

well ... you do ... but in that position you ... so you ...and then you forget to put the question


what am i writing ?!

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by MSI

what am i writing ?!

Nothing, your typing!

If you drink alcohol that is only 7%, does that mean you only get 7% drunk?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Nothing, your typing!

If you drink alcohol that is only 7%, does that mean you only get 7% drunk?

No, if you drink enough of any kind of beer, you'll get 42% drunk and collapse.

Why do people behave differently when they are drunk?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by Mentat

Why do people behave differently when they are drunk?

Because they experience the anti-gravitational effects of Beer, hence wandering about as if it used no energy, running off at the mouth because of the reduction in friction, falling down because of the extra strength of there beer enhanced muscles, and floating because of all of the Beer gas inside of them.

When we "Extrapolate", does that really mean we are taking an
"Extra-po(ll)-later"??

 

[J-Man]

Mr. Robin Parsons asked:
When we "Extrapolate", does that really mean we are taking an
"Extra-po(ll)-later"??

No, it means that the guy who used-to-be the Trapo ("Trapo" is slang for "Trapeze Artist") has not yet arrived. It always pisses off the circus manager.

Can I buy a vowel?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Origianlly asked by J-Man

Can I buy a vowel?

Well, the price of a vowel, as I am sure you well know, has recently been subjected to fluctuations in the International global monetary marketplaces, hence it's value has become an exceedingly difficult assesment due to the logistics of the finacial arrangements required for such a vast transfer of funds as to ensure that it would be much simpler if you could replace the need of the said Vowel, with a constanant, elseif Yes, $0.42 (cents) please!

When Tom (not the one in these forums) Belched, did he mean to indicate "Yes!", or "No!"??

(A clue, it was a loud and sustained Belllllllllch)

 

[Nicool003]

he meant snow



does the phrase "i thought i could almost think of thinking about almost thinking about having a thought"


make sense?

 

[MSI]

i have a garden then i see birds

what is this " " doing?

 

[J-Man]

MSI asked:
what is this " " doing?

That's the normal reaction when one realizes that, instead of the fresh cup of coffee, he just drank his denture cleaner. Nothing to worry about.
P.S. It's usually preceded by: and soon followed by:

Is it better to have a stereo with a volume control that goes to 10, a volume control that goes to 20, or should it just have as many lights as possible?

 

[BoulderHead]

Originally posted by J-Man
Is it better to have a stereo with a volume control that goes to 10, a volume control that goes to 20, or should it just have as many lights as possible?

My vote goes for having as many lights as possible, especially a really annoying great big bright one meant to remind the owner to TURN THAT CRAP DOWN !


Should we pity those who turn their car stereos up so loud, without wearing hearing protection, and freely pitch into buy them hearing aids at some point down the road?

 

[J-Man]

BoulderHead asked:
Should we pity those who turn their car stereos up so loud, without wearing hearing protection, and freely pitch into buy them hearing aids at some point down the road?

No, we should get them missles. The kind of missles that have flames coming out of the back end with a high velocity in the direction of the loud "music", (unless it's Zeppelin of course.) Either that or we should find a way of using all that audio energy to propel our vehicles... hey, if it can make my car bounce up and down 100 feet away, it should be able to make it bounce up and down and move forward.

How many feet per beat could your vehicle go if the propelling stereo has a really good sub-woofer?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by J-Man
How many feet per beat could your vehicle go if the propelling stereo has a really good sub-woofer?

Well seeing as the sonic volume per unit squared is in-equvalent to the tweeter subsets accoustic velocity, the number of feet per beat is co-relationally independant of the sub-woofer, as per the tweeter harmonic that fundamentally begats the requsite propulsive drive spacing as per the interactivety of the volume per unit of ear squared, hence we would find that the most basic calculation of Ft/beat needs to be functioned proportianately to the realtivity of the persons listening to the sound as that is inversely squared to the woofers tweetability.

So it probably works out to, about, 42 ! (unless it is Zeppelin, then is the exponent of that)

Is the true translation of the greek word anatomy, as an english word, An-Atom-in-me??

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons

Is the true translation of the greek word anatomy, as an english word, An-Atom-in-me?? [/B]

Actually, it's not a Greek term at all, it was coined by some Italian kid. You see, his mother asked who broke the vase, and he said "a-not-a-me".

Why do clocks run clock-wise?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by Mentat

Why do clocks run clock-wise?

Because, the other way, is "clock-stupid"!

Is a Volcanic eruption the Earths way of signing it's "Nom du Plume"?

 

[J-Man]

Mr. Robin Parsons asked:
Is a Volcanic eruption the Earths way of signing it's "Nom du Plume"?

No, it just has gas. Dropping a few Tums into the volcano should make it feel better.

If the Earth had no moon how would you tell if you were a werewolf?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by J-Man

If the Earth had no moon how would you tell if you were a werewolf?

Your canines would hurt everytme the sun set.

The hair on your body would grow constantly, at night.

Your fingernails would be claw like in the evenings.

Your urge to ululate would drive you batty.

And the need to lift a leg at trees would indicate your true canine (K-9) nature!

If a unicorn rides into your life, what do you do with it?

 

[J-Man]

Mr. Robin Parsons asked:
If a unicorn rides into your life, what do you do with it?

Chop 'im up into unicorn burgers and have a cook-out.
mmmmmmm uniburgers...

If The Simpsons ever ends, (heaven forbid,) should FOX bother broadcasting anything?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Origianlly asked by J-Man

If The Simpsons ever ends, (heaven forbid,) should FOX bother broadcasting anything?

You mean to tell me that they broadcast other shows now??, Huh?? you mean that there are other things on that network besides the Simpsons, Nah your not telling the truth, are ya, your making that up aren't ya!

Will J-Man ever admit that he just made up the Idea that Fox network airs something, other then The Simpsons!

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Will J-Man ever admit that he just made up the Idea that Fox network airs something, other then The Simpsons!

I don't think that I won't not never admit nothing.

Why does the double-negative in the phrase, "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch", not switch to a positive (i.e. "There is such a thing as a free lunch")?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Origianlly asked by J-Man

Why does the double-negative in the phrase, "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch", not switch to a positive (i.e. "There is such a thing as a free lunch")?

Actually it does, all you need do is double negate your income, and you too can be a homeless person who enjoys(?) a free lunch(s).
(Signed; one who knows, nudge, nudge, wink, wink!)


Since there is actually such a thing as a free lunch, why don't more people take avail/inhale of it??

EDIT for space(ing)

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Since there is actually such a thing as a free lunch, why don't more people take avail/inhale of it??

While I see nothing wrong with taking inhale of it (whatever that means), I don't think you could fit a full lunch into "a vail".

Why do so many people think that Science is a religion?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally asked by mentat

Why do so many people think that Science is a religion?

Because both of them act like they are God!

Why do both of them act like they are God(s)??

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
Because both of them act like they are God!

Why do both of them act like they are God(s)??

Forgive my digression from the question-answer chain but, what are you referring to, when you say "both of them"?

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by Mentat
Forgive my digression from the question-answer chain but, what are you referring to, when you say "both of them"?

A commonality of humor, inasmuch as there is, in humanity, a 'common thread of thought' that goes both ways, (friendly and malicious) in seeing either of those entities, as acting, as if they were "Gods".

But I ascribe to the attempt at humor only, forgive the digression, (no harm done) and apologize for any misgivings/perceptions of malice.

But, (to contiue...) am I truly sorry? (Sincere?)


EDIT SP?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
But, (to contiue...) am I truly sorry? (Sincere?)

Of course not, don't be silly.
Well, okay, be silly, but be silly in a proactive, pragmatic, and 7 other big words, way.

Or should you be silly in a proactive, pragmatic, and 8 other big words way?

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by J-Man
Of course not, don't be silly.
Well, okay, be silly, but be silly in a proactive, pragmatic, and 7 other big words, way.

Or should you be silly in a proactive, pragmatic, and 8 other big words way?

Duh, is that a trick question?

Why doesn't the "Evil" Smilie work?

 

[FZ+]

Because we don't want PF to be a member of the axis of evil...

Why are the good guys always "allied" or "coalition" and the bad guys always "axis"?

 

[J-Man]

Originally posted by FZ+
Why are the good guys always "allied" or "coalition" and the bad guys always "axis"?

Because I said so; now finish your vegetables. Your Mother and I work our fingers to the bone so you can eat and grow up healthy, but do you appreciate it? No! You just sit there and ask stupid quetions.

Am I in the right thread?

 

[MSI]

well that's depend on your definition of "right thread" ...
maybe you are in the left thread



was that phylosophy [?]

 

[Mr. Robin Parsons]

Originally posted by MSI

was that phylosophy [?]

No. it's sly'o'sophistry!

If the "fabric" of space/time is a vacuum, how do you curve a vacuum??

 

[Mentat]

Originally posted by Mr. Robin Parsons
No. it's sly'o'sophistry!

If the "fabric" of space/time is a vacuum, how do you curve a vacuum??

I guess the dumbest thing one could do is scream the truth at you: SPACE IS NOT A VACUUM!

Do you know the origin of a rainbow?

 

[cmdr_sponge]

thats easy it comes from a rainbow flower

can plants tell the time?

 

[Hurkyl]

Depends, is it wearing a watch?


What time is it anyways?