Avoiding homelessness on short timescale

[dmatador]

Would you settle if I said you were being difficult, rather? From what I can see on this thread alone, people are offering suggestions, and you in turn come back with arrogance and bitching and bull****.

 

[G037H3]

Would you settle if I said you were being difficult, rather? From what I can see on this thread alone, people are offering suggestions, and you in turn come back with arrogance and bitching and ********.

I take the time to explain why the suggestions aren't standalone solutions. I'm open and honest. I try to explain simple things that others don't understand, after I've already said them.

I'm not arrogant.
I'm not bitching.

 

[dmatador]

You are very arrogant, and I am definitely not alone in having that opinion. But this thread is way off topic. Good luck.

 

[fluxions]

By your own admission, you have no marketable skills, no social skills, no friends, no family to help you, no money, and a frail constitution. You are nearly homeless.

This seems like fairly strong evidence that your life strategy needs to be revised.

 

[G037H3]

By your own admission, you have no marketable skills, no social skills, no friends, no family to help you, no money, and a frail constitution. You are nearly homeless.

This seems like fairly strong evidence that your life strategy needs to be revised.

I have marketable skills, if people recognize the value of them. The rest are pretty true, but the 'social skills' thing isn't my fault; I'm a great conversationalist.

My life strategy was formerly 'do nothing + wait for owner', now it's 'get an entry-level job, learn to program, befriend a couple of other geniuses, be confident in myself, *find* owner'.

So my strategy has morphed quite a bit. The prime goal remains the same; my attitude towards achieving it has changed.

I have one month. I believe that I can accomplish a lot. :)

 

[JaredJames]

I have marketable skills, if people recognize the value of them.

From what you've said, it doesn't appear so. If people don't see you as having skills, how can they possibly see any value in them.

The rest are pretty true, but the 'social skills' thing isn't my fault; I'm a great conversationalist.

The conversations you have had here, don't show you as having good communicaiton skills. From this and past conversations with you it is clear you think a lot of yourself and even feel that you are above others in intellect, something which appears to be on the basis that you are into philosophy.

befriend a couple of other geniuses

Ah, so you consider yourself a genius. A clear sign of arrogance. (Before you tell me you are a genius, please note you have done nothing in any discussion I have been in with you to demonstrate this.)

I have one month. I believe that I can accomplish a lot. :)

That's a good attitude. Concentrate on a getting a job and a new place. Once done, then focus on programming.

 

[G037H3]

From what you've said, it doesn't appear so. If people don't see you as having skills, how can they possibly see any value in them.

True.

The conversations you have had here, don't show you as having good communicaiton skills. From this and past conversations with you it is clear you think a lot of yourself and even feel that you are above others in intellect, something which appears to be on the basis that you are into philosophy.

Not because I'm *into* philosophy. Because I realize things about the world that few others have fully realized.

Ah, so you consider yourself a genius. A clear sign of arrogance. (Before you tell me you are a genius, please note you have done nothing in any discussion I have been in with you to demonstrate this.)

Okay, so being a genius and knowing it is arrogance. That seems pretty irrational. Either I'm lying, deluded, or 'arrogant'. If I were lying, what purpose would it serve to open myself up to criticism? If I were deluded, the gains I have made in my life perspective are all for naught, as I base my philosophy on self-criticism and the need to overcome the present self.
If I'm simply 'arrogant', I shouldn't worry that you cannot see me for what I am. So I sha'n't worry. :3

That's a good attitude. Concentrate on a getting a job and a new place. Once done, then focus on programming.

Thanks. The idea is to spend roughly 40% of my time* looking for a job/place, and 40% on Python.

*Time = (24hours - (sleep+grooming+eating) )

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Not because I'm *into* philosophy. Because I realize things about the world that few others have fully realized.


Okay, so being a genius and knowing it is arrogance. That seems pretty irrational. Either I'm lying, deluded, or 'arrogant'. If I were lying, what purpose would it serve to open myself up to criticism? If I were deluded, the gains I have made in my life perspective are all for naught, as I base my philosophy on self-criticism and the need to overcome the present self.
If I'm simply 'arrogant', I shouldn't worry that you cannot see me for what I am. So I sha'n't worry. :3

Oh Lord. I have tried to stay out of this but you need to know. Your attitude is a sure recipe for failure. I have watched so many nobodies go down in flames because they couldn't get past their own delusions of grandeur - people who thought no less of themselves than you - that is has literally become a cliche. If you don't lose this attitude, you can expect a very difficult and unsuccessful life. If you were a genius is any meaningful sense, your life wouldn't be a disaster. Set goals, get a job, stop spending the day online telling everyone what a genius you are, and figure out that genius is ultimately measured by one's accomplishments, of which you apparently have none.

 

[JaredJames]

Thanks. The idea is to spend roughly 40% of my time* looking for a job/place, and 40% on Python.

*Time = (24hours - (sleep+grooming+eating) )

Good, I'd suggest more time on job hunting though. Leave python until you get an income and get a new place to live. Focus on one thing at a time.


Side Note:

I'd also request you look at the definition of arrogance. You are claiming to be a genius, but you have done nothing to prove it. That is being arrogant.

<sup>arrogant
1. Having or displaying a sense of overbearing self-worth or self-importance.
2. Marked by or arising from a feeling or assumption of one's superiority toward others: an arrogant contempt for the weak.
3.having or showing an exaggerated opinion of one's own importance, merit, ability, etc.; conceited; overbearingly proud an arrogant teacher an arrogant assumption</sup>

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/arrogant - (Quote format altered slightly to constrain length.)

For all I know you could be a genius. But based on what has been shown here, it doesn't appear so. So you fit the definition perfectly.

 

[fluxions]

I have marketable skills, if people recognize the value of them. The rest are pretty true, but the 'social skills' thing isn't my fault; I'm a great conversationalist.

My life strategy was formerly 'do nothing + wait for owner', now it's 'get an entry-level job, learn to program, befriend a couple of other geniuses, be confident in myself, *find* owner'.

So my strategy has morphed quite a bit. The prime goal remains the same; my attitude towards achieving it has changed.

I have one month. I believe that I can accomplish a lot. :)

What, exactly, are your marketable skills?

The 'social skills' thing is your fault. You need to get out there and learn how to interact with 'commoners.' The first step is to realize that people don't care to hear how great you think you are.

I suggest you find a job in the food service industry. Perhaps a coffee shop. These types of jobs typically accept people with little to no work experience (which certainly describes you). The wage, of course, will be quite low, and the work quite unpleasant, but it will provide enough income for you to get a very modest place of your own and have some food to eat. Further, you will gain valuable skills; in particular, you will learn how to interact gracefully with people you dislike and/or are better than.

 

[russ_watters]

Not because I'm *into* philosophy. Because I realize things about the world that few others have fully realized.

I'll start by plagarizing Ivan:

Oh Lord. I have tried to stay out of this but you need to know...

And fluxions:

...By your own admission, you have no marketable skills, no social skills, no friends, no family to help you, no money, and a frail constitution. You are nearly homeless.

This seems like fairly strong evidence that your life strategy needs to be revised.

It is readily apparent to me and it would appear pretty much everyone else in this thread that essentially your entire life to this point has led you to what is now nearly the rock-bottom of ultimate failure to flourish as a human being. No, you do not "realize things about the world that few others have fully realized". Clearly, essentially everything you think you know about being a serviceable member of society is wrong. You've made a few good steps and looking for help is also a big key towards fixing your life, but you have not yet let go of the belief system that has led you down this road. If you do not reject those beliefs completely, they will forever anchor you to failure.

I hope that stung a little: the sting is a wakeup call that you need to fix this problem of your philosophy, otherwise you will ultimately fall back into the same patterns. Consider this: the only reason you are making an effort now is the crisis that just befell you. It took the perception of mortal danger for you to even begin to reverse your course. Once that fear falls away, I fear you will fall back into your old philosophy and the cycle will repeat.

 

[G037H3]

I'm...disappointed by the previous three posts. None of you seem to realize how hard it is for me to have to deal with normal people. Since you're incapable of gauging my intellect by the ideas I espouse, I suppose that there is no reason in arguing.

I'll just focus on obtaining a job, and becoming a Pythonista. Arguing with people who cannot see what I am is a waste of time. If you have something constructive to say (constructive does not include telling an overly self-critical and self-blaming person that they're arrogant), that is fine.

 

[russ_watters]

I suggest you find a job in the food service industry. Perhaps a coffee shop. These types of jobs typically accept people with little to no work experience (which certainly describes you). The wage, of course, will be quite low, and the work quite unpleasant, but it will provide enough income for you to get a very modest place of your own and have some food to eat. Further, you will gain valuable skills; in particular, you will learn how to interact gracefully with people you dislike and/or are better than.

That's great advice, but I'm not sure a coffee shop will do. Food service at a nursing home probably pays better and accepts a lower quality of worker (which the OP is) because the working environment is so miserable. It is a much better character-builder than a coffee shop where the worst of it will be having snobby rich people look down on you, which may end up just reinforcing your own sense of superiority. Working alongside a poor, uneducated minority who is much better at your crappy job than you are is a wakeup call you desperately need.

 

[JaredJames]

I'm...disappointed by the previous three posts. None of you seem to realize how hard it is for me to have to deal with normal people. Since you're incapable of gauging my intellect by the ideas I espouse, I suppose that there is no reason in arguing.

We have gauged your intellect based on what you post.

I'll just focus on obtaining a job, and becoming a Pythonista. Arguing with people who cannot see what I am is a waste of time. If you have something constructive to say (constructive does not include telling an overly self-critical and self-blaming person that they're arrogant), that is fine.

Look, just because you don't like what you're being told, doesn't make it less true.

Sometimes telling it like it is, despite how hurtful it can be, is the best way forward for someone. If you don't accept what you are being told then we cannot help.

Constructive criticism isn't always positive.

 

[Mech_Engineer]

Set goals, get a job, stop spending the day online telling everyone what a genius you are, and figure out that genius is ultimately measured by one's accomplishments, of which you apparently have none.

 

[G037H3]

It is readily apparent to me and it would appear pretty much everyone else in this thread that essentially your entire life to this point has led you to what is now nearly the rock-bottom of ultimate failure to flourish as a human being. No, you do not "realize things about the world that few others have fully realized". Clearly, essentially everything you think you know about being a serviceable member of society is wrong. You've made a few good steps and looking for help is also a big key towards fixing your life, but you have not yet let go of the belief system that has led you down this road. If you do not reject those beliefs completely, they will forever anchor you to failure.

I hope that stung a little: the sting is a wakeup call that you need to fix this problem of your philosophy, otherwise you will ultimately fall back into the same patterns. Consider this: the only reason you are making an effort now is the crisis that just befell you. It took the perception of mortal danger for you to even begin to reverse your course. Once that fear falls away, I fear you will fall back into your old philosophy and the cycle will repeat.

Ultimate failure? Define success. If success is knowing oneself, then I am undoubtedly succeeding.

Could you possibly imagine for a moment that perhaps some issues with my life aren't actually my fault? An LCD society, spiritual emptiness, culture of lies. These things are not my fault, and are a serious barrier to any sort of security or success.

If I am to give to "society", "society" will be those who are worthy. It will not be those who demand of me without fair compensation. I am not a resource to be abused.

The major flaw of my philosophy, in its current form, is an all-pervading fear.

I am on the edge of the chasm of nothingness, yet I stand there and contemplate it. Nothingness. That seems rather absurd, doesn't it? The chasm, is it a thing? Or is it the absence of something to interact with, a kinetic loneliness.

I fear myself, because I know myself. I fear myself because I know what is possible, and what is possible, nay, what is necessary, are actions which will be emotionally painful.
All of these patterns, speak to me. And I do not hear the echoes of human sentiment.

There, I've given something. It's still a gift, regardless of whether or not you can understand it.

 

[Mech_Engineer]

Wait, this one's even better:

 

[JaredJames]

success
1. the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors.
2. the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.
3. a successful performance or achievement: The play was an instant success.
4. a person or thing that is successful: She was a great success on the talk show.
5. Obsolete.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/success

1. Not you
2. Not you
3. Not you
4. Not you
5. I hope not.

 

[Mech_Engineer]

Some other good ones because I just can't help myself. Funny because they're true

 

[russ_watters]

I'm...disappointed by the previous three posts. None of you seem to realize how hard it is for me to have to deal with normal people. Since you're incapable of gauging my intellect by the ideas I espouse, I suppose that there is no reason in arguing.
[emphasis added]

I honestly feel for you and wish you luck. You've begun to pull out of the dive you're in by addressing your physical needs and that's good, but you haven't even really hit the bottom yet (you're still in the apartment!) so you haven't fully failed yet. Certainly the immediate physical needs are the priority for today and this week, but they are only the result of the problem, they aren't the problem itself. Perhaps the jolt of actually hitting the bottom will do you better than the fear of hitting the bottom has. But either way, fixing the underlying mental cause of the problem is much more critical and much more difficult than temporarily addressing the physical consequences.

I do know a little bit about failure. Growing up, I had a single overriding goal in my life, a goal that was entirely up to me to fulfill. 12 years ago, I was firmly on the path to making it happen and nearly close enough to see it, when a mental flaw that dogged me my entire life caused me to lose it. To make matters worse, it wasn't lost for good, but I didn't deal well enough with the flaw to prevent it from continuing the failure and making it permanent. It was a devistating series of failures.

I still have the flaw, but I'm aware of it, I work to fight it and I'm at least moving in a positive direction. I spent 20 years learning that flaw and I don't yet know if another 20 years is enough to unlearn it, but I'm trying. You're in for a similar challenge and the most important thing you can do is recognize it and start to deal with it as soon as you can: the stakes are much higher for you than they were for me.

Good luck. Honestly.

 

[JaredJames]

Goethe, we aren't here to attack you. I think I can speak for everyone when I say that the members of PF will give you all the help and support they can. But, we also aren't here to blow smoke.

I do hope you sort everything out and get your life on track, but unless you are willing to accept what people here are telling you and at least take it on board you aren't going to get far and all of your posting here will be pointless.

 

[dmatador]

I think you just need to stop thinking. No one on here is incapable of understanding a single thing you have written...

Have you even started programming?

 

[russ_watters]

Ultimate failure? Define success. If success is knowing oneself, then I am undoubtedly succeeding.

I don't think you do know yourself, but regardless, the "success" I'm talking about is in being "a serviceable member of society". Again, you useem to acknowledge these failures:

By your own admission, you have no marketable skills, no social skills, no friends, no family to help you, no money, and a frail constitution. You are nearly homeless.

That's nearly every possible failure to be a serviceable member of society, minus crime.

Could you possibly imagine for a moment that perhaps some issues with my life aren't actually my fault? An LCD society, spiritual emptiness, culture of lies. These things are not my fault, and are a serious barrier to any sort of security or success.

Those things, whether real or not, are not part of what is being described as your failure. Most don't even affect you! Your failures are the things that are directly in your control, and there are a lot of them, but ultimately they can be summed up by your decision to give complete control over your own success/failure over to someone else. A productive member of society cannot give up their personal responsibility for their own success and still label their failure to be the fault of others. The failure to get a high school diploma is yours. The failure to get a job (because you've never attempted to get one!) is yours. The failure to interact with others in a way that enables you to have productive relationships is yours. Or more generally, the decision to give control of your life over to someone else was yours and the failures resulting from that decision are therefore also yours.

If you continue with this attitude, you will get rejected from a couple of job applications, decide society has it in for you and never try again, blaming all of your failures on society never giving you a chance when you haven't put in the effort required to take advantage of a chance in the first place.

 

[Vanadium 50]

I'm...disappointed by the previous three posts.

...

If you have something constructive to say (constructive does not include telling an overly self-critical and self-blaming person that they're arrogant), that is fine.

Remember how I said you can't choose a course of action and also choose its consequences? You also can't ask for advice and also get to choose the advice you receive.

Oh, and you might think about throttling down your contempt for "society" just a notch. They are the ones that will be providing you with the food you eat in just a few days. The reason you will be alive a month from now is because society has decided that even its non-contributing members should not starve to death. In other times or places this would not be the case. Something to think about.

 

[cobalt124]

I'm new to the forum, but I feel I need to say something to you. Firstly Hi. Now the rest. I'm going to be blunt, and what I will say is meant to be well intentioned and for your own good (sort of "tough care" if you will). It may be wrong in parts and coloured by my own experiences which I will apologise for in advance. Take it or leave it as you wish.

First I cannot be of any assistance with your practical situation, which you seem to have a good handle on, but your situation is difficult. Good luck.

From what you say you seem to be a very vulnerable person which seems to be coulouring your outlook (the fear of rape comes to mind, though I don't know all the facts do I). You need to sort out all the practical stuff first, but make sure you do sort it and you are not setting youself up to fail and be a victim and blame all around you (apologies if I am off mark - my personal experience here). You are qualified you need to get a job (stating the obvious here).

Here's a hard one. Your situation is your own doing, based on your own choices (again I don't know all the facts) If you really face this one everything can come right for you (from my reading of the thread you haven't yet). You say you have no friends and no-one to turn to so who else could be responsible (it hurts me to see someone going through this I know how it feels).

I'll now quote you - "As for habits, I've already completely cut out all of my math/programming studies, and all of my recreational internet perusing" - Thats good, keeping your habits may take you away from facing the issue(s). I must add you also need to drop the D/s thing, not abandon it forever but see it as it really is. It seems to me that is a very good way to set yourself up as a victim and stay as one, so I would advise dropping it until you are in a well enough state to have that relationship, or better to be in a position to choose to have that relationship or NOT, because it looks to me like you may be defining yourself on that relationship and submissive feelings and that is wrong (and I tell you it is a damn sight easier to see it in someone else than in yourself), and if this is the case and you really see it you can do something about it (seeing this part of it is slicing up my stomach).

Talk to a lawyer yes. You have rights, and you don't know what they are, and I suspect you don't feel you have/ deserve them. You do. You grew up in an abusive household, do all your troubles follow from that? If so, you need to start making choices not based on your past (easy to say). You say you tend to blame yourself for things that go wrong. Me too, its a good way of avoiding changing anything. You are trying to figure these things out. Definitely good, but note that trying can be a way of avoiding as failing is still an option (personal experience again). As Math is Hard said it seems you do not want control of your life and have handed it to those around you (been there, done that, didn't help). D/s is not a way of life. JarednJames says - "Perhaps not a deliberate act on your part?" It never seems like that but they are your choices (again been there).

I'm starting to repeat things that have already been said so looking at posts #81-96 there is sound advice and you (don't mean to be hard, just honest) are posting justifications and excuses for your situation which will get in the way of making any of it better. Post #96 and philosophy and genius and arrogance, see what is really going on and change it. Post #98 hits the nail on the head I'm afraid. And #101. And your post #102 - correct, don't argue, that's a step in the right direction. If plenty of people tell you you are standing in dog poo, it is likely you are standing in dog poo. All the posts afterwards seem to be giving the message I'm trying to get across in a more succint way so i will stop here.

Sorry if it's weird I've posted all this, I've never spoken like this to anyone, largely because much of my situation was a lot like yours and I've wasted a lot of years and now I'm putting it behind me and can actually do this and feel right inside. Apologies if this is full of apologies (I'm British, sorry). All the best and take care and keep posting how you get on.

John

 

[Mech_Engineer]

Good god man, paragraphs! Your post is nearly impossible to read as-formatted...

[PLAIN]http://dilbert.com/dyn/str_strip/000000000/00000000/0000000/000000/00000/1000/500/1589/1589.strip.gif

 

[JaredJames]

Good god man, paragraphs! Your post is nearly impossible to read as-formatted...

Couldn't breathe I laughed so hard!

 

[cobalt124]

Noted for future. I'm new to this, and was concentrating on getting it all down in the time I had available. Accuracy was most important. I'll endeavour to be as succint and presentable as others are in the forum, which I believe I noted somewhere in the last third of my previous post. Apologies (there I go again).

 

[cobalt124]

Is there a way to edit it and tart it up?

 

[JaredJames]

Is there a way to edit it and tart it up?

The edit button.