Best Pickup Lines: Two Funny Ones to Try

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The discussion revolves around the use of pickup lines in bars, with participants sharing their experiences and opinions on what works and what doesn't. Two particularly bad pickup lines are highlighted: one about commitment and self-change, and another referencing a research grant for a two-day study on finding a woman's g-spot. Many contributors express disdain for traditional compliments like "You have beautiful eyes," deeming them outdated and ineffective. Instead, they advocate for more overtly sexual or humorous approaches, arguing that confidence and creativity are key to successful interactions. The conversation also touches on the broader social dynamics of bars, with some participants criticizing the behavior of both men and women in these settings. Ultimately, the thread showcases a mix of humor and frustration regarding the art of flirting and the challenges of meeting potential partners in nightlife environments.
  • #151
Evo said:
Did you ever go to meat markets with the sole purpose of hunting men? We weren't there because we wanted to listen to music or have drinks, we were on a mission. :devil: :biggrin:

And you say men shouldn't treat women like a piece of meat. :mad:
 
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  • #152
JasonRox said:
And you say men shouldn't treat women like a piece of meat. :mad:
Hey, meatmarkets exist. They're not your regular corner bar. People go there to be noticed and to pick people up. You don't treat anyone badly, but everyone knows why you are there. Men are looking for women and women are looking for men.

Places I went to socialize with friends were different. But going out with Cindy or Terri meant naming your targets. Cindy would claim every guy worth looking at while I was still walking through the door. :frown: It was actually a good rule so that we wouldn't get upset about being interested in the same guy.
 
  • #153
Evo said:
Hey, meatmarkets exist. They're not your regular corner bar. People go there to be noticed and to pick people up. You don't treat anyone badly, but everyone knows why you are there. Men are looking for women and women are looking for men.

Places I went to socialize with friends were different. But going out with Cindy or Terri meant naming your targets. Cindy would claim every guy worth looking at while I was still walking through the door. :frown: It was actually a good rule so that we wouldn't get upset about being interested in the same guy.

Hmmm... sounds like Cindy would be a bad wingman if she were a guy. With me, you can never call anyone... that's actually kind of demeaning, counter-intuitive and the least effective thing to do. Like you said, to avoid being upset. Well, you shouldn't be making emotional attachments to someone you don't even know, so her lack of capability of managing emotions leads to you girls catering to them which is not constructive to her or you.

No one calls anyone their territory with me. If someone does, then I'll walk away and literally never talk to them for the rest of the night. Avoids me knowing who he is "calling" so I can always just say... "You never told me." And I'm right. :approve:
 
  • #154
Moonbear said:
No, I'm not talking about a sports bar, I'm talking about a local neighborhood bar. Sports bars are the bars plastered with TVs in every corner. I don't go to sports bars either, because nobody there wants to talk to anyone, they just want to sit and watch a game and drink their beer.

The best bar around here is the one where you'll come out smelling more like the grease from french fries than cigarette smoke. Great bar food there...completely unhealthy, but tasty. If you go with a small group of people, you can get a table, but aside from the actual bar, they also have a long table at bar height running the length of the room where people on their own can sit with other people...it's like sitting at the bar, except someone could actually sit across from you too, so makes it easier to strike up conversations with other people. Then again, even if you're sitting at a table there, you're not going to be left out of conversation. People regularly shout questions across the room there or strike up conversations with people at adjacent tables. It's nice. Everyone goes there to be friendly and have a good time. No pretenses, no obnoxious drunks (at least I've never seen any there), nobody prowling for hook-ups. It's also a place where there are no class boundaries. It doesn't just cater to students, or the yuppies, or blue collar workers, etc., it has everyone in there...it's a place where the university faculty can be equally comfortable with the custodial staff, or secretaries from local businesses, or the soccer mom, etc. It's nice. Just one TV, sometimes folks watch the game. But it's not like in a sports bar where they're glued to it. It's more something they glance up every so often to catch a score. Okay, the exception being on days when our football team is playing, but the whole town watches football those days, so even the mall is playing the game broadcast over their speakers.

I really can't think of many bars like that around here. I know they had something similar to that in Mass when I was there. I think you should buy me dinner at said bar.......you have beautiful eyes.
 
  • #155
Moonbear, I noticed you made the comment about class differences again. Is there a reason for this?

I never felt this in any bar I've been too. My buddy is umemployed and always goes to bars/clubs where it's common everyone is wearing suits because they just got off work... Lawyers, Professionals, etc... Never had any issues.

If it's like that in the US, that sucks.
 
  • #156
I don't understand how you go out without the intent of meeting people. Seriously, I never run into a smoking hot chick and think to myself "Oh, she's hot. I would talk to her, but I didn't set out to meet people on this excursion. Perhaps I'll run into her in another setting."

That goes double if she talks to me first.

Anytime I leave my bed is a chance to meet people.
 
  • #157
SticksandStones said:
I don't understand how you go out without the intent of meeting people. Seriously, I never run into a smoking hot chick and think to myself "Oh, she's hot. I would talk to her, but I didn't set out to meet people on this excursion. Perhaps I'll run into her in another setting."

That goes double if she talks to me first.

Anytime I leave my bed is a chance to meet people.

I think you are sticking your neck out by making statements contrary to what anyone has said.

(SEE Moonbear. Never talk to the police or PF. If you say one thing, people extrapolate it to mean many other things you never intended. Read mcknia's reply to mgb_phys)
 
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  • #158
SticksandStones said:
Anytime I leave my bed is a chance to meet people.

Do you have a bar in your living room?
 
  • #159
Cyrus said:
I think you are sticking your neck out by making statements contrary to what anyone has said.

(SEE Moonbear. Never talk to the police or PF. If you say one thing, people extrapolate it to mean many other things you never intended. Read mcknia's reply to mgb_phys)

Haha, I know. I didn't even know what to say after that comment. I was like... what?
 
  • #160
Topher925 said:
Do you have a bar in your living room?
Perhaps he sleeps on the streets.
 
  • #161
Cyrus said:
I think you are sticking your neck out by making statements contrary to what anyone has said.

(SEE Moonbear. Never talk to the police or PF. If you say one thing, people extrapolate it to mean many other things you never intended. Read mcknia's reply to mgb_phys)

I guess I misunderstood what she said then. In that case I apologize.
 
  • #162
JasonRox said:
Moonbear, I noticed you made the comment about class differences again. Is there a reason for this?

Responding to Cyrus' comments about those really snooty bars. The type he's showing are expensive and will be filled with only the people who can afford expensive and enjoy showing it off (or pretending they can afford it, which is worse).

Then again, when you live in college towns, there are also a lot of "student" bars. Not many other people go to them, because they're overrun by students (i.e., very immature, sometimes not even legal drinking age), and then nearby, a few bars trying to get the non-student crowd who go the other extreme and are rather expensive and inhabited only by a MUCH older crowd (not really a class difference there, more of an age difference). If you get away from campus a bit more, the bars are more mixed crowds, which I like better.
 
  • #163
Moonbear said:
Responding to Cyrus' comments about those really snooty bars. The type he's showing are expensive and will be filled with only the people who can afford expensive and enjoy showing it off (or pretending they can afford it, which is worse).

Then again, when you live in college towns, there are also a lot of "student" bars. Not many other people go to them, because they're overrun by students (i.e., very immature, sometimes not even legal drinking age), and then nearby, a few bars trying to get the non-student crowd who go the other extreme and are rather expensive and inhabited only by a MUCH older crowd (not really a class difference there, more of an age difference). If you get away from campus a bit more, the bars are more mixed crowds, which I like better.
In smaller, rural towns, there are likely to be lots fewer bars, and the client mix can be explosive. In the town where I live currently, there is one bar, and ALL types of people show up. When I was in my 20's, that place used to get police visits every Saturday night. You had local married couples coming out for some music and a few beers, meat-market types wanting to score, young kids with just enough brains to be dangerous, and people looking for trouble, etc, etc. It was not uncommon to see a fist-fight every 45-60 minutes. The place is now owned by a friend and fellow biker, and he clamps down on the crap pretty quickly to protect his business. Previously, the place was owned by a guy whose son hung with would-be "outlaw bikers" (posers) and his friends caused no end of trouble.
 
  • #164
turbo-1 said:
In smaller, rural towns, there are likely to be lots fewer bars, and the client mix can be explosive. In the town where I live currently, there is one bar, and ALL types of people show up.

One bar in your entire town? Wow, I can't imagine that. The smallest village I've been to over here has more than one pub and these are tiny places. That said, drinking is what we're best at :wink:
 
  • #165
cristo said:
One bar in your entire town? Wow, I can't imagine that. The smallest village I've been to over here has more than one pub and these are tiny places. That said, drinking is what we're best at :wink:
When your town is very rural and has maybe 700-800 residents, it might be hard to support more than one bar. For Jim to pull in enough business at the bar, he has to rely on locals for the daily nut and pull in people from surrounding towns with music/dancing on weekends. It's a tough business. One time (before my reactions to perfumes got real bad), he had a short-notice cancellation, and a friend of mine and I put together a pickup band consisting of me on vocals, lead and rhythm guitar, my friend on lead guitar, another fellow sharing guitar duties with some vocals, a bassist, a really hot drummer, and my sister on vocals. He promoted us (lightly) as "to be announced" with some hints that the band might be good. We packed the place, kept the dance-floor filled all night, and he had the best bar receipts of any night all that year. After closing, as he paid us, he begged us to keep the group together, promising that he would clear his calendar ASAP and make us his house band. It was tempting, because we would have had storage space at the hotel for our gear, it was a short drive for most of us, etc. Ultimately, it would have meant that 5 of us would have had to quit other bands and leave them in the lurch, so we didn't do it. It was a very luck confluence of his short-notice cancellation and the lack of engagements for the people we managed to pull together. It's nice to do something you enjoy for an evening and take home $100+ each for doing it.
 
  • #166
"You have pretty eyes. I think I'll take them."

Based off of:

http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=the+shaving+athf&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&sa=N&tab=wv&oi=property_suggestions&resnum=0&ct=property-revision&cd=2#q=the%20shaving%20athf%20-hakusho-&emb=0

Skip to 7:00

EDIT: okay, it's the first video on the left with the picture of the onion with spider legs. You know what, thanks to Google being so lame, the joke is ruined.
 
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  • #167
Cyrus said:
(SEE Moonbear. Never talk to the police or PF. If you say one thing, people extrapolate it to mean many other things you never intended. Read mcknia's reply to mgb_phys)

What...did I say something wrong or bad?
 
  • #168
mcknia07 said:
Cyrus is so vague about his statements. I can extrapolate anything from them.

Oh really.
 
  • #169
mcknia07 said:
What...did I say something wrong or bad?

He made a joke and you gave a serious reply to it.
 
  • #170
mcknia07 said:
Cyrus is crystal clear and sooo good looking!

Oh really.
 
  • #171
Cyrus said:
He made a joke and you gave a serious reply to it.

Oh, I thought he was being totally serious, my bad.
 
  • #172
mcknia07 said:
Oh, I thought he was being totally serious, my bad.

Don't say "my bad".
 
  • #173
JasonRox said:
Don't say "my bad".

Don't say "Don't say "my bad"."

Yes, I'm very good looking. I Get it.
 
  • #174
Cyrus said:
Don't say "Don't say "my bad"."

Yes, I'm very good looking. I Get it.

Oh, you really think that's the case. Maybe you misinterpreted what I said then...or didn't say...:wink:
 
  • #175
How does it always seem to come back to the thought of me having this huge crush on you?
 
  • #176
mcknia07 said:
How does it always seem to come back to the thought of me having this huge crush on you?

No means no. Please respect my choice.
 
  • #177
mcknia07 said:
How does it always seem to come back to the thought of me having this huge crush on you?

Because he has a huge crush on me, and I have a huge crush on you, everything just goes in circles. (Or triangles...)
 
  • #178
JasonRox said:
Because he has a huge crush on me, and I have a huge crush on you, everything just goes in circles. (Or triangles...)

Oh, ok I get it now then...it all is crystal clear :biggrin:
 
  • #179
mcknia07 said:
Oh, ok I get it now then...it all is crystal clear :biggrin:

I had to call you out on that long reply to what was clearly a joke. Sorry, it had to be done. It was for your own good and my own amusement. :smile:
 
  • #180
Cyrus is a big 'ol meanie!
 
  • #181


BobG said:
If you look into my eyes while we spin, you won't feel so dizzy.

(This is true! This is a trick learned from contra dancing. If you look into your partners eyes while dancing, you won't feel so dizzy and will be less likely to puke - except adding the last part wouldn't be such a great pick-up line.)

Hey, another contra dancer! I wondered if there were any others at PF. So you're in Colorado? I went to the Denver dance once, around 1996. Great dance.
 
  • #182
JasonRox said:
Not sure if you're joking or not?

I wasn't joking. Lol what made you think I was joking?
 
  • #183


Redbelly98 said:
Hey, another contra dancer! I wondered if there were any others at PF. So you're in Colorado? I went to the Denver dance once, around 1996. Great dance.

I've never actually gone to one, yet. It's something I'm at least considering, though.
 
  • #184
Just to stay on topic:
"Wanna go contra dancing?"

Oh, it's worth trying at least once. You'll probably get a little dizzy before the night is through, but looking in your partners eyes during the swings will minimize that.

If you ever go, don't be worried about making "mistakes" (you will your first time), and dance with different people (if you happen to go with a date or girlfriend or spouse) because that will help you learn the moves quicker.

EDIT:
At most dances there is a beginner's lesson before the actual dancing starts. I recommend showing up early, if they have that lesson.
 
  • #185
"What will a tenner get me?"
 
  • #186
hopefully, this has not been posted yet. i can't wait to get back to class to use it :D

"I wish I was your derivative so I could lay tangent to your curves."
 
  • #187
Hi babe, wow is it hot in here or is it just you? { Was that in a movie?}
 
  • #188
Wow! check out Redbelly's avatar today!:
https://www.physicsforums.com/customavatars/avatar122961_14.gif

:smile:
 
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  • #189
physics girl phd said:
Wow! check out Redbelly's avatar today!:
https://www.physicsforums.com/customavatars/avatar122961_14.gif

:smile:

Yes indeedy, a good avatar is better than any pickup line :smile:
 
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  • #190
edward said:
Hi babe, wow is it hot in here or is it just you? { Was that in a movie?}

Especially good line for a woman going through menopause.
 
  • #191
Whoa there guys maybe you won't need a pickup line.

Burger King launches beef-scented body spray
46 minutes ago

NEW YORK (AP) — Looking to beef up your mojo this holiday season?

Burger King Corp. may have just the thing. The home of the Whopper has launched a new men's body spray called "Flame." The company describes the spray as "the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat."

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5htNyNi8i-XrcBv74A8JBGuFM1_4AD955EMP81

FLAME SPRAY

http://www.firemeetsdesire.com/
 
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  • #192
edward said:

Wow! I love this link when you keep clicking the spray bottle!
The best is when you get that come-hither look from the king himself.
Pick-up lines definitely not needed. But the mask might help more than the spray. :biggrin:
 
  • #193
Redbelly98 said:
Just to stay on topic:
"Wanna go contra dancing?"

Oh, it's worth trying at least once. You'll probably get a little dizzy before the night is through, but looking in your partners eyes during the swings will minimize that.

If you ever go, don't be worried about making "mistakes" (you will your first time), and dance with different people (if you happen to go with a date or girlfriend or spouse) because that will help you learn the moves quicker.

EDIT:
At most dances there is a beginner's lesson before the actual dancing starts. I recommend showing up early, if they have that lesson.

Is this something a person can do when they're six weeks pregnant?
 
  • #194
BobG said:
Is this something a person can do when they're six weeks pregnant?

Bob: Are YOU 6 weeks pregnant?

To keep this on the subject of pick-up lines... is your cute little pot-belly round because you're pregnant... or would you like me to try to help you make it that way? :wink:
 
  • #195
One that someone seriously used (it was on a singles show): "my mother is looking for a daughter-in-law, would you want to be that nice daughter-in-law for my mother?"

It worked, after at least the third try he had a date
 
  • #196
physics girl phd said:
is your cute little pot-belly round because you're ...
My wife and I went to the local bar last Friday and that's exactly what I began to ask her. I never got to finish because just then a fight broke out between two of the customers.
 
  • #197
You could just sit at a bar, looking morose, and nursing a beer until the nice lady next to you asks how you're doing. Tell her "It's just my luck. I won the powerball lottery on the same day that my doctor called to tell me that my brain cancer is inoperable." Works every time.
 
  • #198
Redbelly98 said:
Just to stay on topic:
"Wanna go contra dancing?"

BobG said:
Is this something a person can do when they're six weeks pregnant?

That should be fine. It's basically doing up to 3 hours of light aerobics with lots of breaks. If somebody gets winded or a little dizzy they can always stop and sit out for 1 or 2 dances.

Here are a couple of links where you can search for a dance near you:
http://www.contradancelinks.com/
http://tedcrane.com/DanceDB/
Note, you'll probably see some references to English Country Dancing--which is different and less strenuous than contra dancing, but also worth trying.
 
  • #199
Redbelly98 said:
That should be fine. It's basically doing up to 3 hours of light aerobics with lots of breaks. If somebody gets winded or a little dizzy they can always stop and sit out for 1 or 2 dances.

Here are a couple of links where you can search for a dance near you:
http://www.contradancelinks.com/
http://tedcrane.com/DanceDB/
Note, you'll probably see some references to English Country Dancing--which is different and less strenuous than contra dancing, but also worth trying.

They have a dance on the 17th I'm going to. I need to start getting out of the house and, besides, I might even be officially single by then.



physics girl phd said:
Bob: Are YOU 6 weeks pregnant?

To keep this on the subject of pick-up lines... is your cute little pot-belly round because you're pregnant... or would you like me to try to help you make it that way? :wink:

The drawback to doing this is having to do it alone. The plan is to shamelessly exploit my kids and their significant others as my wingmen. Now one of my wingmen is 5 weeks pregnant.

Monique said:
One that someone seriously used (it was on a singles show): "my mother is looking for a daughter-in-law, would you want to be that nice daughter-in-law for my mother?"

It worked, after at least the third try he had a date

On the positive side, I now have a new pick-up line: "My pregnant daughter is looking for a new mother-in-law." No, wait, that won't work. I mean, uh, geez, my life is getting way too complicated and Jerry Springer-like.

I think I'll just go with: "Wanna have sex with grandpa?"
 
  • #200
BobG said:
I think I'll just go with: "Wanna have sex with grandpa?"

Watch out... too many older women might want to really latch on and be "grandma." (Thank goodness my mom doesn't fit that category.)

Seriously... a newly pregnant (even third "trimesterly" pregnant) woman can (and should) get an appropriate amount of exercise... when my high school marching band was preparing for the Rose Bowl parade (in the 90's) part of our fitness program (aerobics sessions) were conducted by an aerobics instructor that was 8 months pregnant!

Your wingman just might want to take care with wearing sensible shoes and being careful about moves that she might be unbalanced in (and fall from). They do caution about working out to the point of being "out of breath." But working out is good.

She should also discuss the form of exercise with the obstetrician. This is important... my sister was rehabbing a torn ACL (with leg presses) and had partial placental separation during the activity. She hadn't talked to her OB about her exercise/rehab program (perhaps because she's an MD herself, and a power-freak). Fortunately her little boy was born a bit small, but is still OK.

So anyway, I'm done hijacking the thread... let's get back to topic!
 

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